by K. L. Jessop
The shot I ordered is down and I’m ordering another two before Jack even had chance to turn. I sniff back my tears before anyone saw as I clocked Marcus heading out the door with Andrew without even saying their goodbyes. Assholes! Why do men always have to jump to conclusions and accuse you of shit you’ve not done just because their ego is dented for a few hours. It pisses me off.
“Steady, Ginger Spice. I don’t want to have to carry you home and have your man thinking I’ve led you astray.”
“Why are men such hurtful inconsiderate pricks?” I shot at him. “And he’s not my man.”
“Ok, what’s he done?” Lucas asks on a sigh.
“He more or less thinks we’re fucking.”
“Ah, I see. He’s jealous, that’s good. Shows he has feelings. Shows he cares.”
I snort throwing back another shot. “He doesn’t care. He’s leaving me in a few weeks. I’m nothing more than his summer fuck buddy with the added bonus of being on his payroll.”
“Oh he cares. I’ve seen the way he looks at you.”
“How the hell can you work that out, you’ve only been here five minutes.”
“Guys intuition.” He grins.
I roll my eyes and order another drink. Lucas quickly cutting me off and suggesting to Jack water would be better. So the big brother routine finally kicks in and puts a stop to my night of getting shit-faced to forget a man I desperately wish was by my side.
Turning on my stool I look out over the dance floor, smiling at Megan as she parades on the table in the corner that’s now become her permanent stage on a weekend. A wave of anxiety churns my belly as my leg bounces on the footrest of the stool. That’s when it hits me. I’ve not been anxious in weeks. Not since the first time I removed my clothes for Marcus. If he goes back where would that leave me and my state of mind? Maybe I need him more than I realised. That caused my gut to cramp at the thought of what this could mean if he stayed. Yes my feelings for him have changed, but they can’t be any more than just a desire for sex as that is all I can give him, anything more than this doesn’t even bear thinking about. That word changes things. It changes people.
“I’ve already been broken once, Lucas. I can’t go back there again.”
“Babe, it doesn’t matter who broke you and brought you down, what matters is who made you smile again and we both know it’s him. Talk to him; find out what will happen once he returns. Long distance works for some people but you won’t know if you don’t try.” He throws back his drink and licks his lips. “Now, dry your tears because I know you’ve been crying and put a smile on that pretty face or yours and follow me. I want to take advantage of those legs while I can.”
I take his hand and follow him towards the dance floor to meet Megan who jumps into his arms from off the table. The three of us take over the floor in style, laughing and goofing around without a care in the world as the ladies swoon over Lucas. My laughter leaves my lungs but inside I’m anything but happy and if I feel like this now I dread to think how I will cope when Marcus has gone.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Marcus
Top marks for acting like a complete dick head.
My fucked up insecurities soured and empowered my mind with unwanted questions I already knew the answers to. That said, I still couldn’t push them aside. I’ve never been the jealous type and if that was a first class act of jealousy I fucking hate every minute of the feeling that runs through my body and mind. The words that left Amelia’s mouth shook me; I never imagined her to say them and never imagined her to leave me gut-retched in a darkened office like a kid whose favourite football team had just lost the world cup. Today was her day, full of excitement and surprise guests and there I was playing the dick that ruins the party and gets everyone talking. I knew what Lucas was to her yet I couldn’t help the rage I felt every time I saw his hands on her. She was mine; I want her to be mine.
Time and space was what we needed regardless. I left early as my mood would only increase the more I saw them together and I didn’t want her upset, but I couldn’t leave her alone any longer than I already had. It killed me to leave her behind; I didn’t want to go home to an empty bed unless she was with me.
Getting the spare key from Megan along with an earful, I waited at Amelia’s for her to come home. This gave me chance to cool off and think shit through. Try and work out what the fuck I’m going to say and hope she accepts my apology for being a total ass-wipe.
It was after midnight when I heard the door go, shouting her goodbyes in giggles to her friends as her heels click along the floor. Sitting back in the living room chair in my T-shirt and boxer briefs I take in the scent of the flowers that fill the room as I watched her. Her face was priceless this morning when we came home and she found her house decorated into her very own meadow. I love how her face lights up, the way her eyes close as she inhales the scent and the little hum that leaves her afterward.
She works her way round the kitchen slightly unsteady on her feet as she takes off her heels before getting a glass of water and checking her phone, only to throw it down on the counter with a sigh. I turn on the living room lamp as she walked towards the bedroom; causing her to jump “Jesus, Marcus, what the fuck!” she holds her hand to her chest. Her once neatly fixed hair now sagged from too much dancing, creating wispy strands to fall around her face, her perfectly applied make-up now smudged a little under her eyes as her pale lips showed evidence of blue lagoon cocktails. My dick twitched to attention. She really was pure perfect; this woman could make wearing rags look sexy.
“Amelia, come here please.” My words were a little more forceful than intended. Her body instantly went ridged; hesitation covers her frame as she stands looking at me and fingers twisting her ring.
“Are you angry with me?” she murmured.
Even after the time spent together there was often times my words would shake her in a way I didn’t like. Her eyes would darken with uncertainty and dread as she gripped her hands in tight balls to stop the shakes. One night when getting all sexed up her body shuddered when I without thinking removed my belt from my jeans in a swift action. Making me aware once again that this strong woman that stands her ground at times was still so fragile. I soften my voice to reassure her panic. “No baby, I was never angry with you. It’s ok, come here.”
Slowly making her way over I pull her down to straddle me. She’d been crying. My heart burned as though a knife had been ripped though it at the thought of making her cry. I only ever want to see her smile. My hands run over her hair and body before resting back on her jaw. I’m lost without this woman, but I don’t know who I am when I’m with her. She takes over my mind, body and soul in the most endearing way it chokes me. “I’m sorry for acting like a complete prick. I never meant to upset you.”
“Marcus, me and Lucas have history but not in the way you think. He-”
I go to speak but she places a finger on my lips. “Hear me out please. Lucas plays a huge part in my recovery. After him and Megan got me out I was all over the place, I was scared to be on my own and scared to sleep alone. I’m not going to lie and say we haven’t slept in the same bed because we have, but only so his strong arms cradled me for as long as I needed them. That was all it was. Marcus, Lucas pays for my therapy sessions. I have and always will have a special bond with him because of what he has done for me. He’s like a brother I never had and I love him dearly. You have nothing to be jealous of baby.”
Ok so now I feel the biggest prick ever. Why didn’t she just tell me this before, it would of saved all of this. “I’m such an ass. I just saw you together and thought… Shit; I don’t know what I thought, but I didn’t like it. I don’t even know what to say.” I sighed.
“You don’t have to say anything, I understand your reasons. Insecurities can be a bitch at times but you just have to try and get past them. Talk about them. Don’t be afraid to tell me how you’re feeling, I can’t help if I don’t know.”
Fuck can she get e
ven more incredible. Here she was constantly carrying the anxiety torch and made it flash every once in a while yet she’s here offering her support and wanting to fix me and my shitty ways. “You’re adorable you know that?”
“Although I must say, the thought of you jealous did kinda make me horny,” biting her lip.
“Oh really. So does this mean we have a little making up to do?”
Her grin was sinful as her eyes flashed with lust. Trailing her fingertips along my jawline causing a shiver through my body as she dipped her head to meet my lips. Her tongue tasted of a mixed flavoured mini bar, her lips sticky with fizzy drinks as her vanilla and honeysuckle scent merged together with post-dance sweat. She tilts her head back as I kiss along her jaw, a soft whimper leaving her throat as I reach her weak spot on her neck. The little whimpers that often drove me wilder than her screams as I tantalized her body.
“You intoxicate me, Amelia. I can never get enough of you.”
I drive my tongue back into her mouth to play with hers, sex with Amelia was incredible but her mouth does things to me that I never thought it could. It’s like an addiction, a never ending drug, constantly on a high and craving for more as she engulfed me with everything she had. I love the way I feel when I hold her, touch her, taste her. Her delicate traces of her sweet tasting tongue on mine sent my body into a frenzy just as much as the hard strokes she provided when her own mouth was hungry.
“Marcus?” she whispers.
“Tell me, baby.”
Taking my jaw in her hands her thumbs smooth over my face, her chest beginning to dust pink, a sign I knew she was losing control of her emotions that slowly take over her big blue eyes. “I don’t want you to leave.”
My gut twisted with her admission as a single tear slid down her cheek. This whole situation had been crushing me since the moment I laid eyes on her. I’ve never been so afraid of leaving someone like I have Amelia. She does things to me that scare me shitless but I wouldn’t change it for the world, my feelings for her are deepening by the day. She’s all I think of first thing on a morning and the last I see at night, and I know my days won’t be the same without her in them.
“I don’t want to go.”
Her mouth collided with mine in a desperate need of hunger, our moans play into each other as her hands take the hem of my shirt to remove it. Her kisses pepper my neck, teeth pinching the skin on my collarbone triggering a growl from my throat as she rocks against me. Her arms stretch up as I pull her dress over her head, unclipping her hairpin for red locks to cocoon around her face, lacing a thick ribbon between my fingers and breathing in the honey scent.
Her eyes never faltered from mine as she slowly glides her fingernails down my front and enters my boxer briefs. My eyes drifted closed, a throaty groan escapes my lips when she strokes her hands along my shaft. I love how her confidence grows each time we’re together. Not afraid to let her hands roam my body. It’s like she need constant skin on skin connection in order to breathe. Shifting her hot pink lace aside I slip my fingers into her wet pussy as the scent of her arousal lingers between us. She’s always ready and waiting for me to take her anyway I want.
“I love that you’re always ready for me, Amelia. It drives me crazy.”
“I’ve been ready for hours.” Her hooded eyes are full of heat and desire, changing her bright blues to a sexy royal blue as she holds my gaze that burns into hers. I don’t think I’ll ever get over what this woman does to me-my body, my soul. My constant need to touch her is sinful, an aching need that never ends. It’s only been a few hours out of her embrace but it feels like a lifetime.
I take her by the waist and stand, shifting out of my boxers and pushing her back against the wall. Her legs wrap tight around me as I kiss the sensitive spot behind her ear, sucking hard and nipping her skin to mark her. Her moans hit my ears as she bucks her hips, telling me what she’s after as my hands fall to her pink lace and in one quick sweep I tear it from her body.
“I liked those.” She gasps with a flash of excitement in her eyes.
“I’ll buy you more.” I can’t wait another second, I slam into her, resulting in her to cry out as her nails dig my shoulders. The relief is welcoming, my veins funnelling with intense lust as my eyes fall heavy.
“Fuck me hard, Marcus. I want to feel you for days.”
Her eyes tell me she meant every word and I pull out slightly only to slam back in, gripping my hands under her thighs as I fuck her hard, hitting the spot I knew drove her wild as her cries play out into the room. My blood soured its thick heat in every vessel, unearthly grunts leave me as I rock our bodies hard against the wall. When we fuck I know the limits with her and she trusts me. Sex is a massive deal for Amelia as power and control can change instantly, leaving her vulnerable and defenceless, but every once in a while her confidence rockets and no holding back is need. “Look at me baby.”
She tightens around me, the rush of my orgasm about to boil as it burns its way through my body. This wasn’t love making, it was pure hard fucking. Amelia’s face contorts into a wail as she milks me with her violent climax that tore through her. I fuck her with every ounce, whimpers and cries left her sexy lips as the fire inside me ejects deep inside, coating her walls with my heat.
“Amelia, fuck.” Stars dance in my eyes as my orgasm continued to rip through me like a fire-ball. Our eyes lock, hearts beat fast as sweat peppered our skin. Taking her hands above her head I kissed her like I meant it, giving her everything I owned and everything she needed as I pull her lip between my teeth. “Thank you.” I exhale. More often than not Amelia was the one that always thanked me, anything I did no matter how big or small, whether it were a gift or a cuddle she would always thank me. Only it was my time to thank her for everything she was making me feel.
She giggles, her lips red and swollen. “Sweet Jesus, we should fall out more often.”
“You said you wanted to feel me for days. Did I hurt you?”
“Only in the best way, I love the way you make me feel.” Her eyes flash with something but they dart from me before I had chance to read them, wrapping her arms tight around me to bury her face into my neck. I love the way I make her feel too, she doesn’t have to tell me anything I don’t already know, that I don’t already feel. I turn us round and lean my shoulders against the wall, catching the reflection of us in the living room mirror. The red locks coat her back as she holds me close, her fingers trace and twirl in my hair, relaxing my body into her touch as her breathing beats against my skin.
When I first met Amelia I had no idea she would grow to be so important to me, she’s changed the person I was and made me a better one. Her existence is a gift, her embrace is my shelter and her eyes have become my new home. I can’t see life without her, I don’t want another day spent without her. My heart skipped a beat as the feeling that has overwhelmed me all these weeks becomes clear. I’m in love with the angel that stole my breath and etched her beauty into my heart.
Chapter Twenty-six
Marcus
I love to watch her sleep, to run my eyes over her body. I don’t think she has any idea how many times I’ve just laid watching her over the last couple months we’ve spent together. The mornings that I spent with Sadie were a quick case of satisfaction, shower then head to work hardly saying two words to each other. With Amelia it’s totally different, we spend time with each other, get one another off, talk, touch and listen to each other breathing as we lay close. It’s like each second is precious. I love wasting time as long as she’s with me.
“You’re doing it again, Mr Matthews,” she mumbles in her groggy voice, burying her face into the pillow.
“Doing what?”
“Disturbing my sleep with your wandering hands.”
“I thought you liked my wandering hands?” I chuckle softly.
“Oh, I’m not complaining I’m just saying you’re doing it again.” I run my hands down her back and over her bare ass giving it a little squeeze as her sleepy eyes
flutter open. After our make-up sex last night we held each other for hours as I tried to comprehend everything I was feeling for her and everything she’s done to me since arriving. I just have to pick my moment in telling her I want her forever and I can’t see a life without her in it.
“You look tired.” I murmur as I tuck the hair behind her ear.
“My head hurts.”
“Too many Blue Lagoons and Tequilas?”
“Ugh, tell me something I don’t know. I kinda hit the shot selection after you left too. That was until Lucas went all big brother on me and put a stop to it.” Remorse hit my gut at the thought of her drowning out my shitty attitude towards her friend with booze. I never wanted that, believe it or not I like the guy, I just acted like a prized prick swimming in jealousy. “You are alright with him being around aren’t you? I don’t want any bad feeling from an-”
I place my finger on her lips to stop her talking. “I’m fine, we are fine, and everything is going to be just fine.”
“Hmm, well in that case go make me breakfast, I need calories in the form of chocolate.” she groans, placing her arm over her eyes.
“What the lady wants.” I get out of bed and stretch letting my muscles wake. Slipping on some jeans as my phone buzzed with a message.