by RS McCoy
Hale beamed. “They’re interesting creatures, aren’t they? I’m glad you had a good day. Next time, we’ll go together.”
Raene didn’t realize she’d be going to meet Hydra regularly. For some reason, she thought it would be just the once. Still, she smiled at Hale’s insistence to protect her, even if it was only from Hydra traders.
Or maybe it was to protect them from her.
Raene felt that flare of aggression renewed. With Hale’s arm around her waist, she worked to swallow it down. She kept her thoughts on her breathing and her steps, one by one taking her closer to Hale’s tent.
She had no idea how she would get away.
“I got you something today,” he said when they were far enough from the others.
Raene looked up at him. “You did?”
“A welcoming present. You’ll see.” Raene didn’t press him further. Knowing she’d made plans to go hunting with Parson made her feel guilty. Knowing Hale had been picking out gifts for her in the meantime made her feel downright horrible. More and more, Raene felt like a she had turned into a terrible person.
Lying. Scheming. Killing. The old Raene was gone, and this new, awful Raene stood in her place.
At that moment, Raene made up her mind not to go. She couldn’t change what had happened with the elk, but she didn’t have to keep doing it.
Sooner or later, she was going to have to get her totem under control—might as well be now.
Raene and Hale pushed into his tent, already lit with his multitude of candles. On the table, goblets of wine were already filled, but it was the other items that caught her eye: stacks of moss-green and honey-brown fabrics. Terra clothes. A dozen items, if not more.
Hale pulled her over and let her inspect them up close. “These are shirts, all your size. And the pants had to be altered, but Yaiza finished them this afternoon. They should all fit.”
Raene did her best to keep the horror from showing on her face. She knew he meant it as a sweet, welcoming gesture—he’d said as much—but she didn’t want to wear Terra clothes—not now or ever. And it would only hurt him to refuse his gift.
“How about some wine?” Raene asked, to which Hale chuckled softly.
“I thought you’d never ask.” His hand skimmed the small of her back as he handed her a goblet.
Raene drank eagerly. She gulped the wine but couldn’t quench her thirst.
She wouldn’t give in so easily. She didn’t need to kill. Amberwine was satisfying enough.
Raene refused to give her totem power over her. She was more than capable of sitting in Hale’s tent, drinking wine and chatting, without feeling the need to murder anyone or anything. Kaide had learned to keep his beast at bay, and Raene would do it, too.
And as much as it surprised her, she did like Hale. Rubbing her back and telling her stories, Hale had a way of calming her. No one else had been able to accomplish such a feat since her transformation.
“What did you do today?” Raene asked, eager to keep her mind on more civil subjects.
Hale shook his head. “Not much. I thought I’d be at the trade today. I took care of some things, checked on the outliers.”
“Outliers?”
“The clan members who live outside of camp. The Grace family houses and tends the horses. The Connors have a garden that supplies us between trades, not that we really need it. Gemini grows some of the finest fruits, so no one’s complaining.” Hale shot her a smile, but Raene was too stuck on the name.
“She was friends with Blossom?”
“Gemini? She’s friends with everyone, but yes. She was close to Blossom.” Hale’s features darkened in a way she hadn’t seen before.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked.” Raene slipped into her old habits of decorum.
“Can I ask who told you that?” There was a severity in his eyes that made Raene afraid.
She sipped her wind and told him. “Asla. Why?”
Hale stood and turned his back to her as he refilled his goblet with wine. “We’ve made it clear we don’t want non-family to mention her.”
“Why would you do that?” Raene sat stunned.
Hale turned, and for a moment, he stood in the dancing candlelight trying to find his words. “I’m sure you can imagine we’re all rather upset with that particular turn of events. I have faith in the Mother and her plan, but that doesn’t change the fact that I love my sister and hate that she’s gone.”
“Hale—” Raene began, but she ran out of words. Instead, she pushed out of her chair and wrapped her arms around his neck, mortified she’d even thought he might be so heartless. Tasia had warned her not to say anything, and Raene was simply too stupid to listen.
Hale’s hands found her waist. “I shouldn’t have said that,” he whispered. “I trust the Mother. It’s wrong of me to be angry.”
“How could that be wrong?” Raene wondered how angry he would be if he ever found out Blossom was no longer under Kaide’s protection—that she might not even be alive.
Hale pulled away but left a hand on each of her hips. “Did Da tell you I’ll be clan leader?” When Raene shook her head, he continued, “Well, I will. And someday, all these people will turn to me for protection and guidance. I can’t let myself get so emotional over things I can’t change. Blossom was meant to go with your uncle. It was the Mother’s will. I need to be better at showing my faith in her.”
Hale tilted forward to kiss Raene’s cheek. “And this is her will as well. You were meant to be here.” Reminded, Hale motioned toward the stack of clothes on the table. “There’s a few nightshirts there. Why don’t you get changed while I get us some dinner?”
He was gone before she could protest. Raene stood alone in his tent and tried to think of what she could say to him. She hadn’t meant to upset him about Blossom, and she didn’t want to disrupt this newfound trust he’d placed in her. But Raene couldn’t let go of her Pyro roots so easily, not even for him.
Then, she saw the look on his face as he pushed into the tent with two full plates. He wore a deep-set frown at the Pyro clothes she still wore. “They didn’t fit?”
Raene sucked in a breath for strength. In her best warm tone, she replied, “I would prefer to wear my Pyro clothes.”
Hale set the plates on the table and collected her hands between both of his. “I know this is all new and strange, but it’s for the best. Terras value modesty, and these clothes will put you in the best position in the eyes of the clan.”
Raene kept careful control of her tone as she said, “I understand your Terra values, but I’m not Terra. I appreciate the gesture, really I do. But I want to wear my own clothes.”
Hale sighed and released her. “As you wish.”
After that, they talked and ate—bread and roasted vegetables, to her dismay—but an uneasy cloud hung over them. She continued to drink wine, but it did little to quiet the storm within her.
Raene could only wonder if they were having their first fight, but she knew resolution was futile. She wasn’t willing to compromise. Hale could try to convince her all he wanted, but that wouldn’t change who she was.
If nothing else, Raene was Pyro.
When evening faded into darkness, Hale surprised her and said, “I’m going to go sleep at Da’s. Do you want me to get your bag from Lathan’s tent?”
Raene’s mouth fell open with shock at his refusal to sleep in the same tent as her while she wore her Pyro clothes. It was enough to destroy the last of her resolve. “I’ll get it,” she replied, seizing the opportunity before she could second guess it. “I could use some fresh air. All this wine—” Raene waved her hand like it was nothing, but she couldn’t even fake a smile as she darted out the tent flap.
But rather than turn toward Lathan’s tent, Raene didn’t hesitate to trot into the forest. In the twilight, her human eyes were less useful, but it wasn’t dark enough to give her cat eyes the advantage. She picked her footing carefully, following her nose toward the stream and the man
who would take her hunting.
Parson used the edge of his fingernail to smooth out the fletching of an arrow. The lazy, meandering stream gurgled at his back where he sat on a large stone. An hour had come and gone and still she hadn’t shown. He should have known she’d bail.
He shouldn’t have let himself get excited to see her totem again. It was selfish to want to watch her hunt with his own two eyes, to witness her raw power in action. From the little glimpses he’d seen, Parson hummed with excitement. Only now, she hadn’t showed, and his excitement had soured into disappointment.
She was probably curled up in Hale’s tent, sipping wine and laughing, enjoying her new, carefree romance with the best man Parson knew. Maybe he was touching her shoulder. Maybe he was kissing her. Maybe worse.
It shouldn’t bother him, he knew. He had no right to feel anything but happy for the new couple. He should have been ecstatic for his brother to have earned such a bride.
But Parson had never been in control of his emotions. They erupted like geysers, dissipated like thunderstorms. He was as powerless as a leaf sailing on the current of the lazy stream.
He tried to think of Blossom, of whatever life she was living in Pyrona with her new husband. The thought made him want to hurl. That rush of anger was all he had left of her, but it had lost its edge. Maybe she was happy there—maybe she enjoyed her new home.
If Pyrona produced people like Raene, it couldn’t be all bad. Could it?
As always, his thoughts seemed to find their way back to the Pyro princess, to the tiger raging inside her.
His bear ears heard her first. The small snapping of a twig. The rustle of shoes on the leaf litter. Her red shirt appeared from a shadow a moment later. No, not red. Scarlet.
“I’d almost given up on you.” Parson tried to tease her—to pretend like this wasn’t as difficult as it was—but when he saw the stern frown that had once been her pleasant mouth, he knew it was no use.
“This way.” Without waiting, Parson moved deeper into the woods. Her footsteps appeared behind him in seconds.
She was eager. She wanted this.
“How does this work?” she asked, her voice low, like she thought someone might overhear.
“We go far out, so far we won’t accidentally get back to camp. We’ll keep in sight of each other but not too close. We’ll hunt small game, nothing messy. Only innocents.” A moment later, he asked, “Do you know how to tell the difference?”
“In what?” Raene’s arms crossed over her chest.
“Between innocents and totems.” When she shook her head and looked up at him with those alluring eyes, Parson explained, “Innocents live their whole lives as an animal. They have nothing but instinct. Fear and hunger and survival. In totem form, we have those too, but we also have the human side. An innocent will flee on instinct. A totem will hesitate, their human side will think for a moment before they act. You can see it in their eyes.”
“You said we’d be far enough away.” There was no mistaking the fear in her voice.
“We will. Why?” And then, Parson knew. “Da said something.”
“I don’t want to talk about it,” she countered. “I’m sorry, I just—”
Parson couldn’t hold it against her. “I know. Believe me. I know.” He increased his pace, hurrying to put camp as far behind them as possible. His bow jostled against his shoulders as he trotted further into the uncharted depths of the Alderwood.
He took her a good hour out until he knew they were well enough away, and then he took her another twenty minutes past that, just in case. At last, the time had come.
Parson tightened his bow and quiver against his back. “Ready?” When he looked over, Raene had crumbled. From the low hang of her shoulders to the way her eyes never left the ground, Parson could see her fighting it.
He should have stopped sooner.
“Go on,” he prompted when she didn’t move. “Go. Go hunt.” Parson had to push her to get her to look at him, but once she did, he knew that was all it would take.
Her eyes blazed. Even in the dark, those blue eyes shone bright as they turned gold. Her pupils elongated into the fierce predator eyes that could see every animal in the night. Russet fur sprang up along her arms, spreading like fire through a dry meadow. Where before she’d been rigid, standing solidly and trying to hold it in, now she was wild, her arms shaking as they rippled with layer upon layer of muscle.
In seconds, she fell forward into her cat stance and stretched her paws. When her tiger eyes caught on him, she released a low rumbling growl.
“Go!” Parson shouted, appealing to what little of human-Raene was still in there. She needed to hunt, to kill, to eat, but he would prefer if she didn’t make him her meal.
He watched her race between the trees in awe. Parson had never been anything other than the most impressive creature in the Alderwood. In a forest of deer and rabbits and foxes, the bear was king. And now, at last, he’d been eclipsed. Raene was magnificent.
The sight of her made his chest ache.
Parson let her get a full minute’s head start. He couldn’t keep up with her, anyway. But still he waited those eternal seconds before giving in to his own transition. In his bear form, everything was so much clearer. There was only the tiger he tracked, the growl in his belly, the strength in his legs. No need to worry over his lost sister or the quiet beauty who took her place.
The scent of her filled his nostrils as soon as his transition was complete. Bear-Parson sniffed the area for several seconds, enough to get a sense of where he was and where he would come back to, but after that, he was only hunting.
His strong bear legs carried him between the trees, though it was a sort of clumsy ambling compared to the lean, capable strides of the tiger. Her. The tiger, he remembered. He was following a tiger.
Bear-Parson tried to hold on to the idea of her, of hunting with someone, after he’d been alone so long. He kept to her trail easily enough, only venturing away to catch his own meal—a pair of rabbits in a shallow burrow, a fox caught outside its hole, even an old badger, thankfully too slow to put up much of a fight.
But quickly enough, he followed her scent again. With his belly less empty, it was easier to concentrate, to remember why he was following her. Bear-Parson kept to her trail, running tirelessly through the dark woods until he heard her ahead.
Her cat feet were too quiet to hear at such a distance, but her hissing growls were loud enough. Bear-Parson raced ahead, eager to intervene if she was in danger, but instead, he found her circling a coyote. The air was thick with the scent of blood, and when they turned, he saw the coyote’s mouth coated in crimson.
It had somehow managed to injure her. Without hesitation, bear-Parson flew forward and smashed his hulking frame into the coyote. The yellow-grey dog could do nothing as it was crushed against the ground, smothered and shattered in an instant.
Then came the fire in his shoulder. Claws dug deep into his flesh. Tiger claws.
Bear-Parson howled at the attack. The forest echoed with his sound as he threw her off him and watched her slide across the forest floor.
Tiger-Raene was too quick. She was on her feet and charging him a second later. Bear-Parson stood tall. He waited for her to be just near enough before he swatted her away, using his massive paw like a club.
She landed on the ground and was slower to get up this time. Bear-Parson seized the opportunity. He rushed her and stood over her, pinning her claws under his weight. She may have been quicker and more agile, but she could never beat him in a contest of strength.
He only had to wait for her to tire.
And tire she did, but only after several minutes of fighting him. She kicked and growled and squirmed to get a claw free, but bear-Parson remained. Only when he saw her transition begin, did he let his own occur. Had she been her human form beneath his heavy bear form, he would have crushed her instantly.
But Parson managed to calm himself and slip into his human form as she shrank
beneath him. Before she could fight him, he grabbed both her wrists and pressed them hard into the ground.
“Did you eat?” he asked when her blue eyes caught his green ones.
“Let me go,” she protested.
“Did you eat?” he repeated, demanding an answer.
Raene scowled deeply at him. “Foxes,” she all but spat at him.
“How many?”
“Five.”
Parson relaxed, more than impressed. “Five?”
She looked away as she said, “Two adults, three cubs.” After that, he released her entirely. If she was human enough to be upset about killing fox cubs, then she wouldn’t transition again. Not for a while, anyway.
He moved away, all too aware of how close they’d been just a moment before. His eyes fell to the body of the coyote only steps away. “What was that about?” He pointed, wondering if she knew coyotes were uncommon this far from Terrana, or that this one wasn’t an innocent.
Raene sat up and shrugged. “Not sure. He jumped on my back and—” Suddenly remembering, she craned her neck over her shoulder and tried to see the damage.
Parson scooted through the leaf litter to have a look. In the dark, he couldn’t see more than the crimson stain on her torn scarlet shirt. “It doesn’t look too deep. Just flesh. Ruined your shirt, though.”
Raene pulled her knees to her chest and rested her face against her arms. Where moments ago she’d been an impressive tiger, now she was a girl, curled up and scared.
“Raene—” he started, but he didn’t know what else to say.
“He got me Terra clothes,” she whispered against her arm. Parson didn’t see what one had to do with the other, but she clearly told him for a reason. He was just too dumb to figure it out.
“That’s good, isn’t it?”
She picked up her head and turned to look at him, her eyes dim and her smile fake. “Yes, it is.”
Parson immediately knew he’d guessed wrong. She pushed to her feet and started back in the direction they’d come, never for a moment guessing her whereabouts. He could do little more than jump up and follow her.