We sat at the counter and started eating without saying a word.
It was the first time I had been alone with Audrey in such a familiar atmosphere.
The idea of being there with her had always frightened me, so much so, that I had no longer gone inside what was once our home, as long as she was there.
Yet at that moment, I fully savored all the warmth the came from our past together.
It was painful to hear how that closeness and that simple dinner could affect my mood so much.
I had gone into the house filled with frustration, while now I would have paid to stop time.
Could Audrey still manage to give me all that stability and serenity after all the harm she had done to me?
I would have liked to hate her and avenge myself, but something inside me had died out, leaving only the peace and pleasure that the one who had been the love of my life for seven long years managed to bring to me.
When Audrey pulled her unforgettable lasagna out of the oven, I could not help laughing with happiness.
"I hope you like them. The recipe is always the one from my old college friend," she exclaimed cheerfully, putting a generous portion on each plate.
"Good," I commented after the first taste, feeling a lump in my throat at the thought of how much I had missed those simple lasagna.
"Only good?" She offended.
"Heavenly,” I confessed sincerely. "Are you by any chance pampering me like you used to?"
"Yup."
"Why? What do you want back?"
"I want you to relax. Ryan told me you have not been on a vacation since he has been working for you. He told me that you have never lost a day of work in three years. I think you need to chill out. Take this opportunity to breathe calmly again. At least for a few days."
"We are here on business, not to relax."
"I'm sure things will be better tomorrow."
"If you say so."
"I promise you," he whispered softly, placing a hand on my arm.
It was the first time she had touched me and suddenly I felt every neuron disconnect.
The only thing I wanted was to kiss her.
Yes, I wanted to kiss her.
"Now it's better if I clear the table. You wait on the sofa. In a little while, I am coming back with the dessert," Audrey hurriedly took her hand away from my arm and walked away her cheeks purple red.
Obedient and too shaken by that sudden excitement, I moved to the sofa, where I tried to distract myself by watching television.
"Fruit salad and pistachio ice cream, your favorite, isn't it?" Audrey exclaimed after a while, bringing me a dessert cup.
"You haven't forgotten my tastes."
"We have been together for seven years. You have been my husband and, even if it is now a thing of the past, I will never be able to forget you and all your habits or preferences. I loved everything about you," she confessed to me with a sad smile on her lips.
"When did you stop loving me?" I found myself wondering without realizing it.
I saw her hazel eyes melt into mine.
There was a plea in her gaze, an invitation not to ask her such a question.
I did not even try to stop her when I saw her running towards her bedroom with a hurried goodnight.
18
Audrey
When did you stop loving me?
I had cried all night thinking about what I was going to answer.
I never stopped. That’s the truth.
I had run away like a thief for fear of saying something compromising or that could have reopened wounds that were not totally healed.
That question had made me feel at the mercy of the past, of that evening that had unconsciously turned out to be a threat to my tranquility, making me wish for things I thought I had erased from my mind for years.
I had cried all night aware of what had happened, wondering how I could go back, feeling inside me that pain the separation had caused.
I have to get away from Zane. I have to do it or ... I don't know what will happen.
That morning, at six, I was already in the kitchen making myself a coffee.
I was about to sit in the living room, in front of the window overlooking the lake, when I realized that Zane was sitting on an armchair on the patio.
I went out to join him.
The air was cool and very humid.
"Good morning, how are you?"
"I didn't sleep last night," Zane replied, still keeping his eyes fixed on the lake.
"Me neither."
I went back inside and got more coffee and a plaid from the sofa.
When I went out, I approached Zane, put the blanket on his legs and put the cup on the nearby table.
"Why are you doing this?" He asked me at a certain point, holding my wrist still while I was trying to wrap the blanket around him.
"I don't want you to get cold. Today is an important day and you cannot afford a cold," I replied in a professional manner as a perfect personal assistant.
"I'm not talking about this."
"You aren’t?"
"You know what I'm referring to."
"No, I don't know, and I don't want to know," I replied, trying not to falter under his increasingly intense gaze.
"I'm referring to this," Zane insisted, pushing me so hard that my mouth collided with his.
That contact set my whole body on fire.
I tried to pull back, but his grip became firmer and I felt languidly surrender under that rough and poignant assault, which emerged from a desire that seemed to have remained lit, albeit buried over the years, like a volcano never extinguished.
When we broke lose, our breaths were both breathless and confused, our looks full of fear and anger at what we knew was forbidden and dangerous for both of us.
It was as if we were both deciding to blame the other for making such a mistake.
"Is this what you want?" Zane asked, trying to compose himself.
"No," I whispered weakly, unable to wipe off the heat that still burned on my lips.
"Last night, dinner ... those talks ... You knew they would lead to this."
"It's not true. I didn't want this ... "
"Wasn't it enough for you to destroy me once?"
I was startled at that accusation.
"I swear it wasn't my intention."
"Wasn't that your intention?! Why? Betraying me and leaving me, tell me, what did you think would have happened to me?"
"I never betrayed you, but I lied to you. There are many things you do not know. Things that threatened my wellbeing during our last year of marriage. I was lost. I was destroyed and, for fear of dragging you down with me, I chose to leave you, when in reality I should have asked you for help. Now I realize it and I also understand the evil I did to you. I apologize deeply. I repeat: it was not my intention to destroy you, on the contrary!"
"What really happened?"
"I didn't tell you at the time to keep you from being hurt and I won't do it now for the same reason. Four years have passed, and you have managed to move forward. I am immensely proud of the results you have achieved and of the man you have become. I don't see why I should destroy what you are today with what is past and forgotten."
"Audrey ..."
"Zane, let's think about the present. We are here for Farlight, not to rekindle our dead marriage," I ended the conversation. "Finish the coffee. I'm going to get ready," I said good-bye, going to my room, proud of myself for not shedding even a tear, knowing what I had kept hidden from Zane.
19
Audrey
It took me two hours with Edmond Farlight and his wife Karen to understand that Zane had been wrong in his approach.
The elderly couple was too old-fashioned and too accustomed to the poverty-related simplicity that had characterized most of their lives.
Karen had not been properly educated. The business world was foreign to her and overwhelmed her, while Edmond had remained attached to simple things and simple p
eople, to the countryside, to slow-moving issues...
Zane represented everything they did not understand and did not want to face: his always precise and classy look created excessive formality, his brisk and decisive ways confused them, his continuous reference to the prestige of the brand and the Thunder Company did not help to create a peaceful and relaxed atmosphere.
Furthermore, Karen seemed to be totally alienated by that behavior and her husband followed suit, reduced to submission. I was sure that, in reality, she was the one in charge of the situation.
After the interview I attended without saying a word, we headed for the car.
"Of course, you could at least say something and help me out!" Zane snapped furiously and accusingly.
"Do you trust me?"
"No."
"Zane, do you trust me?" I carefully repeated the sentence, staring straight at him.
"Yup. Do you have something in mind? "
"Give me carte blanche and I promise you that the contract will be signed by tomorrow."
"Impossible! I haven't even been able to leave it with him and they have the right to read it and discuss it with the other minority shareholders. "
"Trust me. I only ask that you trust me."
"Okay," he gave up unhappily.
"Well. Then let's get started, 'I exclaimed elated, stealing the car keys from him.
"Where do we go?"
"In town. A shopping day awaits us."
"You're joking, right?"
"No. Get your credit card ready."
"Oh my God…"
20
Zane
I had not completely understood Audrey's strategy, but her vitality managed to prove infectious and let me to a day of compulsive shopping, full of purchases I hadn't made for years.
Audrey had insisted on making me buy a pair of jeans and a blue polo shirt to combine with casual shoes.
She too had taken on a new floral dress with a wide skirt, a narrow waist, and short puffed sleeves. She looked like a woman from the sixties.
Then we had bought a lot of local food items, getting in touch with all the main local producers. We also had a special basket of sweets and preserves put together by one of the country's most loved and talkative traders.
To my amazement, I found out that that basket was for the Farlights.
It was Audrey who brought it up, putting on the new dress and forcing me to take off my jacket and tie, and to roll up my shirt sleeves.
I was forbidden to say a word and, when I heard Audrey apologize for that second unexpected visit, I felt embarrassed, but then she showed the gift basket as a sign of gratitude for that wonderful opportunity to stay at the country house, and everybody felt relaxed and right at home.
“I hope you accept an invitation to dinner tonight. I will cook. Do you like Italian cuisine? I have a secret recipe for lasagna and would like to hear your opinion, Mrs. Farlight, in return you must absolutely give me the recipe for your apple pie. In town they say you are the queen of apple pies, "Audrey said cheerfully.
"Gladly!" Accepted the happy lady immediately.
"I don't know ..." tried to refuse Edmond Farlight, but Audrey stopped him immediately.
"There is only one condition: I don't want to talk about work. Zane and I want to spend a happy evening in your company, without thinking about duties or work."
The Farlights accepted immediately.
Satisfied, we went back to our country house.
"I'm sorry, but you'll have to put up with another lasagna. I've been looking for some new recipes, but tonight I need my workhorse and my lasagna is always a winner," Audrey apologized immediately, as I helped her put away the shopping.
"No problem." I would have eaten her lasagna every day of my life. It was my favorite meal.
"Perfect. So, while I am preparing the sauce, you go to take a shower, put on your new clothes, don't go overboard with aftershave and no gel in your hair, "she ordered me peremptorily.
She seemed to be in control of the situation and, for once, I felt like her personal assistant.
I listened, but when I went back to the kitchen, Audrey immediately came to check on what I had done.
"Please try to be more spontaneous and less sophisticated," she advised me, unbuttoning the first button of the polo shirt, and slightly messing up the hair I had pulled back.
Feeling her fingers on my skin caused a vibration that spread throughout my body.
As I felt pain and excitement at the same time, I realized that I had never forgotten her touch.
The effect it had on me was always devastating and engaging.
Unwittingly, I found myself placing my hands around her hips.
Then when she came even closer to smell my aftershave, I completely lost my mind.
My grip became more determined and I brought Audrey's body against mine.
Through the clothes, I sensed her warmth and her sinuous forms match mine.
I had always been convinced that our two bodies were perfect as two pieces of a puzzle, shaped only to fit together.
Even today, I found comfort and desire in that union so absolute and complete.
"Don't do it," she begged me when I leaned over her to kiss her.
"Do you want to tell me that you don't want it too?" I asked her, with our two breaths mingling together.
"I did not say this."
"Then?"
"We cannot."
"Why?"
"It would be a mistake. We would regret it later."
"How much are you willing to sacrifice to make this mistake?"
Her eyes had always been an open book for me.
I could clearly read the answer: "Everything."
Her lips parted to answer me, but I did not wait.
I pressed my lips against hers and savored that kiss full of desire and something I could not quite decipher.
From the way Audrey responded to my kiss, it looked like she was going through hell and I was her only lifeline. An anchor she seemed to have searched desperately for years and that she had now found when he no longer hoped for it.
I too felt the same enthusiasm and the same intense emotion.
That kiss was the answer to all my prayers, which for years had held on to the hope of not having lost everything.
"We're hurting ourselves," Audrey managed to tell me when we broke away to catch our breath.
"I know," I admitted, pulling away from her, my heart seeming to want to explode in my chest.
"We have a mission to carry out," he immediately tried to recover, returning to slicing the vegetables. "Will you help me set the table?"
After a last silent exchange of glances searching for solidity and determination in the other, we went to work.
Since the evening was warm, I prepared the table on the patio facing the lake.
Meanwhile, Audrey finished preparing the lasagna and I helped her with the appetizers.
"I forgot the salad. Can you take care of it and combine all the julienne vegetables I've already sliced? "
"Why are you just telling me now?" I got angry. It was just five minutes before our guests were due to arrive and the first dish was not ready.
"You will soon understand my strategy. The important thing is that you make yourself busy when they enter. I do not want your presence to make them uncomfortable. Remember that this should only be a simple dinner with friends. Nothing more. Now get busy."
I avoided going back to arguing as Audrey seemed so self-confident, but as soon as I started cutting the salad leaves, I saw the Farlight couple coming.
"Good evening! Please come in! Unfortunately, we are a little late," Audrey welcomed them joyfully.
"I made my famous apple pie," the woman whispered shyly, holding out a baking tray.
"Thank you very much! Smells wonderful! I can't wait to taste it!"
"And I took out one of my bottles that we bought in Florence. I thought I would stay on the topic of Italian cuisine you told us about,"
Edmond Farlight agreed.
"Really kind of you. Can you tell me where the right glasses for this wine are?"
"I'll take care of it!" I intervened, offended that Audrey wanted to put our guests to work.
"No problem. I know this house perfectly since my son and I have renovated and furnished it. This was supposed to be his home, but in the end, he preferred to follow his wife and move to Chicago."
"Now, that explains what he was doing in a big city!"
"Of course. We went to see him, since we hadn't seen him for three months, but I don't mind telling you that I don't particularly like the frenzy of big cities."
"Can I do anything?" Asked his wife uneasily.
"The appetizers need to be brought to the table."
"Perfect," said the lady happy to be of help.
Apparently, that division of tasks had lightened the atmosphere and we all seemed relaxed and happy.
I had to take note of it: Audrey had figured out how to do it!
By the time I got to the table, the Farlights were already talking about their trip to Florence.
The conversation was light and full of interesting anecdotes.
Surprisingly, I realized that I had never heard the two guests talk so much in those three days.
In addition, the food was delicious and highly appreciated, so much so that Audrey and Karen started an intense discussion on the food and successful recipes, while Edmond and I remained focused on European wines and on the fact that his son had studied architecture and did not drink, thus leaving his father taking care of his company.
As soon as I mentioned the work, we could do for him as a publicist, I got a massive ankle kick from Audrey, who however seemed apparently taken from Karen's tiramisu recipe.
Apparently, I was being kept under control.
Offended and in pain, I consoled myself with a second portion of lasagna and enjoyed dinner as I had not done for years, until Mrs. Farlight caught my attention.
"And you two, how long have you been married?"
I almost swallowed what I had in my mouth.
"We are not married," Audrey merely replied, looking down, lost on the empty plate.
The Sweet Poison of Revenge Page 7