“I don’t think she’s going to be satisfied until we at least have one dance.” He offered me his arm, much like Mr. Rogers had offered his to Grandma Dixie. “What do ya say?”
“Oh, umm…” I wasn’t sure what to say. I didn’t think it was the best idea, but he was right. Harmony was like a dog with a bone. When she set her sights on something, it was just best to get out of her way.
The corner of his lip turned up, revealing a deep dimple in his right cheek, as he said, “You don’t have to be scared. She was kidding about the ass-kicking part.”
Again, I found myself laughing. I took his arm, and as he led me onto the dance floor, I looked around the room for Trace. We still hadn’t talked about anything. But, if he’d gotten upset about a fake boyfriend, I didn’t think he’d be too happy about me real dancing with his cousin.
When we reached the center, he placed his hands on my lower back and I rested my hands on his shoulders. As we swayed to the music, I had to admit that he smelled delicious. And the way he led me left no question in my mind that he could dance. Really dance.
“I would ask you about yourself,” he said, “but I think we both know that Harmony has filled in most of the small-talk blanks.”
And for the third time I found myself chuckling. “Yeah, she has.”
I liked Austin. He made me feel comfortable, and I started to relax. All of my efforts to keep my emotional distance from Trace were for not. I was in real, deep trouble.
I was in the arms of a beyond-sexy man with gorgeous eyes, deep dimples, and a voice that would make any woman’s ovaries explode. Plus, he was funny and could dance, and all I could think about was how much I wished things were different. I wanted to be on that dance floor with Trace.
“So, Harmony said that you were single?” Austin asked with more than a hint of amusement.
“Um, yeah.” I nodded perhaps a little too emphatically.
“You sure about that?” He grinned as his eyes narrowed. “’Cause my cousin is heading our way and he looks like he wants to kill me.”
I whipped my head around, and sure enough, Trace was just a few feet away with a not-so-happy look on his face.
“Hey, T.” Austin dropped one arm from my back. “Did you want to cut in?”
“No.” Trace wrapped his arm around my waist and practically dragged me with him as he headed off the dance floor.
When I looked back to thank Austin for the dance, he lifted his hand in a small wave as he smiled from ear to ear.
“Trace?” I looked up at him as I moved my feet as fast as possible to keep up with him. It was harder than it looked with the heels I’d decided to wear tonight.
And I wasn’t doing that great of a job, because before we even made it off the dance floor, I stumbled. Thankfully, Ninja Trace scooped me up and carried me like a bride on her wedding day.
I buried my face in his neck, not wanting to know if anyone had noticed his display. I didn’t know if every eye at the event was on us or if he was really mad or not, but I did know I was in the arms of the man I loved, and that’s all that really mattered.
Chapter 32
Trace
“Gravity can’t stop the scariest fall of all. Love.”
~ Dolly Briggs
I’d heard people talk about being so mad that they saw red, but I’d never thought it actually happened. I’d been wrong. When I’d walked in and seen Cara in the arms of my cousin, I’d been pissed. But when her head had fallen back as the sweet sound of her laughter had filled the air, I’d seen red.
I pushed the door to the back office open and set Cara down. The door slammed behind me, and she flinched.
“Trace?” Her voice sounded so small.
The last thing I ever wanted to do was upset her, but I felt like I was losing my mind. Frustrated, I ran my fingers through my hair as I paced the room. I thought about starting with telling her how I felt, but I thought it would be better to see where she stood on things.
“What do you think is going on between us?” I managed to ask semi-calmly.
Her chest rapidly rose and fell. “Um, I think we are friends that—”
“You think we’re friends?” I snapped. I hadn’t meant to raise my voice, but hearing her categorize us as “friends” had caused that knee-jerk reaction.
“Yes,” she breathed.
I continued walking back and forth in the small space.
“What’s wrong?” she asked softly. “Are you mad about me dancing with Austin? I was only doing it because Harmony is trying to set us up.”
“She’s what?” I stopped in my tracks.
Cara shrugged. “Yeah. Since I told her that I broke up with Derek, she wanted me to get back up on the horse.”
“This is un-fucking-believable.”
“I know.” She nodded solemnly.
This whole thing had spiraled out of control, and I needed to make things right. Once and for all. I had to do what my mom already assumed I had and pull my head out of my ass. I had to convince Cara that we belonged together. Not in secret. Not as friends with benefits. Really together.
I stood directly in front of her. “Cara, I can’t do this anymore.”
Her bottom lids filled with moisture. “Okay.”
That agreement had come too easily, and from the look in her eye, forget about the same page. We weren’t even reading the same book.
“Okay?”
“Yeah. This was…great. But, now, Colton’s back and…” She pursed her lips as her head bobbed up and down and she opened and closed her hands, like she did whenever she was trying to be brave.
I’d seen her do it on several occasions. The first time was when our dog, Rover, had passed away. Cara had always loved Rover, and when Harmony had told her what had happened, she’d taken it really hard, but she’d tried to be strong for Harmony.
Another time I’d seen her have the same reaction was when I’d taken Harmony to the hospital to visit Cara and the doctors had come in with blood results that were not what they’d been hoping for. When they’d told her that she would have to stay in the hospital for another six-week round of chemo, she’d gotten teary eyed, her lips had tightened, her head had nodded rapidly, and her hands had fisted and released as she’d tried to assure us that she would be fine.
“Cara.” I stepped closer to her, needing to touch her, to comfort her, but she took a step back.
She lifted her hands in a defensive stance. “It’s fine, Trace. Really. I always knew what this was. I’m not stupid. I knew going into this that we…that you…that this was, you know… It was never going to be more than…”
“More than what?”
“More than sex.”
“That’s what you really think? That all this was just sex?” That wasn’t true. There was no way she really thought that.
“Yes.”
“That’s all this was to you? Just sex.”
Her gaze dropped to the ground. “It doesn’t matter.”
“Yes. It does.” I took another step forward.
“No, it doesn’t.” Her voice rose, and it was her turn to start pacing. “I knew what the rules were going into this, Trace. You don’t do relationships. Everyone knows that.”
“Why do you think that is?” I barked.
“What?” She stopped.
Knowing this wasn’t going anywhere, I changed tactics. “Why do you think I’ve never had a real relationship?”
Her head slowly moved back and forth, and she lifted her hands, her palms facing up. “Umm, because you don’t want to be tied down. No one keeps your attention. You want to keep your options open. You like variety. You—”
“No,” I interjected, trying to stop her rant.
It didn’t even slow her down, she was full-steam ahead like a runaway train. “You have a commitment phobia. You want to sow your wild oats. You get bored easily. You don’t like to—”
“None of them were you.”
This time, my interruption stopped her in
her tracks.
Her voice was just a whisper. “What?”
“That’s why I never had a relationship. Because none of those girls were you.”
I considered myself an expert on all things Cara. I knew when she was happy, sad, confused, scared, nervous, or upset. But, right now, when I really wanted to know what she was thinking, it was a mystery. Her face was blank as she stared at me.
“What?” she repeated again.
All I could hear in my head was the pounding of my heart. My palms were damp, but there was no turning back now.
“I love you, Cara. I’ve been in love with you for so long I don’t remember what it feels like not to love you.”
“What?” She shook her head.
“I love you,” I repeated, and just saying it out loud and having her hear it made me feel like a huge weight had been lifted. I’d opened the emotional door I’d kept shut and everything just spilled out. “I love you. I fell in love with you when I was too young to know what it was or what to do about it. Then, when we played Spin the Bottle and I kissed you, I knew. I knew I had to do something about how I felt. And I was going to. I was going to ask you to the Valentine’s Day dance on Monday, but when I got to school, you weren’t there. You were home sick. Then you…”
I took a deep breath. “Then you were really sick, and I just waited. I waited for you to get better. I waited to hear from Harmony every time you had a test or a checkup. When you had to stay home and Harmony would ride her bike to go visit you, I’d go with her and wait on the porch just so I could be close to you. When we were older, I always volunteered to take Harmony to the hospital so I could wait in the waiting room because maybe”—I cleared my throat as I choked up with emotion—“maybe I would get to go in, play games with you, make you smile, just see with my own eyes that you were alive, that you were fighting.”
“Trace…” Tears began flowing down her face.
“I waited, Cara. I waited on the sidelines of your life because I knew that you had enough to deal with. I tried to do what I could to make things better for you. When Harmony told me that you were crying because you had to shave your head three days before your fourteenth birthday and you were canceling the party, I told her to make sure you didn’t and I convinced the entire football team to shave their heads.”
“That was you?” Her bottom lip trembled as tears streamed her cheeks.
As much as I wanted to pull her into my arms and hold her, I needed to get this out. “When you had to miss the sophomore talent show, I talked Mr. Hawkins into putting on a special performance on your front yard, so you could watch—”
“Could watch from my window,” she finished. “Why? Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I just wanted you to be okay. You were fighting for your life. My being in love with you didn’t matter.”
“Yes it did. It does.” She took a step towards me, and just when I thought she was going to walk into my arms, she stopped. “I love you too, Trace.”
My heart jumped.
“I always have. And these past few weeks have been the best weeks of my life.” Her voice cracked, so she took a shaky breath. “But we can’t…be together. You need to be with someone you can have a life with.”
“What the fuck does that mean?!”
“It means…someone you can marry and have babies with, Trace.” She took a deep breath and squared her shoulders as she wiped the tears still falling down her cheeks. “The reason I can’t get pregnant is because the chemo made it… I froze my eggs when I was sixteen, but that’s no guarantee.”
“Do you think I care about that?”
“Don’t you…don’t you want kids? Don’t you want to be with someone who’s not damaged? Who you don’t have to worry about if she gets a nosebleed or is tired or has a headache? Or that, at any second, the other shoe is going to drop and she’ll be sick again?”
I stepped forward as frustration rioted through me. “Have you been listening to anything I’ve said? I don’t care about any of that. And, whether we’re together or not, I will be worried if you get a nosebleed or are too tired or have a headache because I love you! You are what I want! You’re all I’ve ever wanted. I fucking love you!”
She looked tortured, and I could see that this was not getting through to her. I had to make her understand. I had to make her see what I saw.
“What if it were me?” I asked.
“What?” She sniffled shakily.
“What if I were the one who got sick or couldn’t have kids? Or, hell, what if, tomorrow, I get hit by a car and am paralyzed? Would you stop loving me? Would you walk away because things weren’t perfect?”
“No, of course not.”
“Why?” I asked harshly. “Why wouldn’t you? You’re young. Beautiful. You’re just starting to live your life. Why wouldn’t you leave?”
“You know why.” She sighed as her shoulders dropped.
“You’re right. I do. You would be by my side because you love me. So, why is it so hard to believe that I could love you the same way?”
The lost look in her eyes broke my heart.
“Cara, I love you. I love your smile. Your eyes. Your legs. Your tits. Your laugh. I love the way you bite the inside of your mouth when you’re thinking. I love the way you brush your hair behind your ear when you’re nervous. I love that you have different shades of blushes and I know what each of them mean.
“You are the bravest, strongest, sweetest person I’ve ever known. You don’t give up when things get hard. You just get through it with a smile on your face. You would do anything for the people you love. You make this world a better place by being in it. You make me a better man just by knowing you.
“Last night, I couldn’t sleep. I could barely breathe without having you in my arms. I don’t want to spend another night without you. I don’t want to sneak around another day and pretend or hide that you are the love of my fucking life. I don’t want you to lie to people about having a fake boyfriend. Cara, I want to marry you. I want to spend the rest of my life having the legal right not to be on the sidelines your life. Cara, please, please, be my wife. Marry me.”
“Trace,” she breathed.
I waited. As hard as it was, I waited.
It was silent for several moments, and then shouts erupted.
“Put him out of his misery!”
“Say yes!”
“Lock that down!”
“Let him put a ring on it!”
Cara and I stared at each other. Her eyes widened, and then I turned slowly and opened the office door. Outside were all of our friends and family. Most of the women, including my mom, my sister, and Destiny, were crying.
Harmony, who was in front of the pack, pointed up. I followed the direction of her finger and saw that my brother’s office wall did not go all the way to the ceiling, which meant that our entire conversation had been public, not private.
When I faced Cara again, she started laughing through her tears, and I knew in that moment that it was all going to be okay. As long as there was a smile on her face, everything in the world was right.
Since our relationship had been about as unconventional as it got, I figured a little traditional wouldn’t hurt.
Getting on one knee, I took Cara’s hand, and she beamed down at me with a wide smile, tears still falling down her porcelain cheeks.
“Cara Elizabeth McCord, will you marry me?”
She nodded as she repeated, “Yes. Yes. Yes.”
I stood and pulled her into my arms, lifting her off the ground as cheers and whistles burst from the crowd.
So many emotions competed for top billing. Joy. Love. Relief. Knowing that this was real, that Cara was going to be my wife, felt like I’d just won a Super Bowl, a World Series, or the lottery—but better. A lot of people won those things, but Cara and her love was one of a kind. Priceless.
I wasn’t on the sidelines, I was beside her, and no matter what we faced, what challenges came our way, I would take care o
f her and she would take care of me. We finally had each other. I was hers, and she was mine.
THE END
Sneak Peek: Discovering Harmony
Don’t miss AUSTIN STONE’S story GOING TO FIND TEMPTATION coming May 19th in Erin Nicholas’ Sapphire Falls Kindle World!
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Unedited excerpt of DISCOVERING HARMONY coming this June!
Chapter 1
Harmony
“She’s whiskey in a teacup.”
~ Loretta Reed
Hello, Karma. Your reputation precedes you and I see it is well earned.
Although I had been accused, more than once, of leaning towards the dramatic—usually by one of my eight older brothers—I think even they would admit that this was bad. Really bad. What was that saying? No good deed goes unpunished. Yep. I would say that this was a prime example of that theory being proven.
All my life I’d used a scale of one to ten to mentally gauge and catalogue experiences. One being horrifically awful, ten being out-of-this world amazing.
Winning front row seats and backstage passes to the Tim McGraw and Faith Hill Soul2Soul tour was a solid nine. One of the best nights ever.
My first real kiss at age eleven with Brady Calhoun was a five. Not great, not bad.
Getting my wisdom teeth extracted and ending up with dry socket was a two. So painful.
In two weeks, I would be twenty-three years old. And in all those years, I’d yet to assign either a one or ten to any occasion in my life. I’d reserved them, because where can you go from there? But, today may be the first time that one would be designated to a life event.
“Stay!” I pointed at Romeo, the black Labrador retriever I had just liberated from doggie jail, and who was the party responsible for me potentially heading to human jail, and instructed him to remain in the back seat.
He whined as he wagged his tail rapidly. I decided to take his behavior as a declaration of obedience. I had a flannel blanket that I stored in my car so I could sit on it during Movies in the Park—which was an outdoor movie shown on the side of the three-story courthouse every Saturday night in my hometown of Wishing Well—and I grabbed it and tossed it over the Lab’s head in an attempt to hide the evidence, and also hopefully make him feel safe from the thunder and lightning.
Convincing Cara (Wishing Well, Texas Book 2) Page 21