“That would be a first. Be careful, you might shock me to death.” The old woman pulled her upper lip back into a horsey smile of disdain.
A nurse bustled in, squeaking in her shoes and carrying a plastic tray with a dome-shaped lid.
“Oh joy of joys, my dinner has arrived. What’s it today, Melody?”
The nurse’s expression was the picture of irritation. She slammed the tray onto a table nearby and charged off without a word, back into the hall to squeal the silver trolley down to the next cubicle-sized room.
“How rude.” Mama snapped the lid up and examined the contents of the plate.
Steak cut into strips and an array of cooked vegetables.
“Mama, I came to talk to you. You have a minute?”
The old lady picked up her fork and toyed with the bits of meat. It actually looked pretty good. There was a mushroom sauce on the side and Emily’s stomach grumbled.
“About what?” She deposited a bit of the steak into her mouth, chewed and muttered under her breath.
Emily plastered a fake smile on her face. “About how well things are going now.”
“Oh?” Mama narrowed her eyes and carried on feeding herself meat. She tore at the flesh and masticated it.
Anxiety burbled in Emily’s gut.
“Yes. I’m out of the strip club and the debt is paid off.”
“I see miracles do happen,” she answered, spearing a glazed carrot. “But if you’re not at that scummy club, how are you earning?”
“I’ve got a job at a dance studio.” A lump sprang up in Emily’s throat. Janet wanted her out and she didn’t have other prospects yet.
“Good for you.” But there wasn’t an ounce of pride in her mother’s answer. It was as bland as she thought the food was. Once again, it was as if Mama didn’t care what happened to her daughter.
Nothing made a difference to her.
“Yeah, so I’m going to get the kids back.”
“What?” Mama snarled, dropping the fork with a clatter.
“I want custody of my children.”
Becci and Jared were the only reason she’d clung to sanity in prison, in the club, in life. She had to save them from their father.
“You’ll never get it. I hope you realize that.”
Her mother had always taken Brian’s side over hers. If Mama had a choice, Brian would have been her son, not her son-in-law and Emily… well, she’d be just another woman on the street.
“I’m going to find a way. I won’t let them stay with him anymore. He’s a madman.” The years of mental abuse had taken their toll on her, but she was stronger now.
“Oh grow up, Emily,” Mama answered, picking up both her knife and fork this time, “he’s a congressman. There’s not a court in this country who’d grant you custody over him.”
Emily swallowed hard. Maybe she was right. Maybe it was a fruitless escapade. She was an ex-con and he was the grand congressman, poised to take over the country if he got a chance.
Brian’s dreams of running for president were an ever-present nightmare for her. The thought of him in a position of power made her stomach turn.
“Anyway, I’m going to try.”
“You’re going to fail.”
“How can you say that?” The skin of sadness and guilt – it was always there when she visited her mother – lifted for a second, and the bubbling anger shone through from underneath.
Mama laughed and finished chewing up a bit of broccoli. “Because it’s the truth.”
Emily had no one else to turn to, no other support, but this wasn’t helping. There was no point to talking to her mother.
She stood and shouldered her bag, then walked to the door.
“Wait, Emily,” Mama began, and she paused, glancing back with a little hope. “It is the truth. You will fail because you’re a failure and a disappointment and that’s all you’ve ever been.”
Emily’s heart dropped to the floor and she couldn’t pick it up. “I’ve made the best of my life. I’ve turned things around.”
“You’re kidding yourself if you think anything good will come of this. You should stick to your slutty dancing and leave those children alone. They’re better off without you.”
Those were the sentiments she’d dreaded hearing. She didn’t want to believe that she wasn’t a good enough mother for them. But what did Mama know about being a good mother?
“They’d be better off with me than with him.”
“You’re a lowlife, a drug addict, and if you do get the kids back you won’t be able to manage them anyway.” Mama’s stare was deadpan, blank of emotion.
“I’ve paid my dues. I deserve happiness now more than ever.” She had to believe that or her strength would crumble.
“You deserve to be locked away, child.” Mama sighed and shook her head. “I don’t know why you insist on paying me these ridiculous visits. I don’t need your input and you certainly don’t need mine. You’ve always gone your own way, even though you’re too stupid to see that it’s the wrong way.”
She slumped back against her pillows, the energy draining from her as the color drained from her face. Mama was old and bitter. She wanted to spread her anger in every direction because she was unhappy – that was the excuse Emily gave for it.
Hot tears etched their way into her soul, burning furrows into the millions of little cracks which existed there. She turned and left the room, her mother’s cutlery scraping on the plate behind her.
She had to get out.
CHAPTER FOUR
She dumped a six pack of beer on the counter and considered buying cigarettes.
“Nah,” she whispered it and the store clerk perked up. He was middle-aged and balding, and he gave her a wink.
“Need anything else?”
The cigarettes were a habit she hadn’t picked up yet, and she’d keep it that way. She couldn’t let her mother drive her to drink and smoke. That was just excessive.
“I’m fine thanks.”
“You sure?” He reached out and stroked the back of her hand, leaving a trail of damp. Was that sweat? Good God that was repulsive.
She snatched the six pack up and slapped down a few bills. “This will be it.”
The human cue ball gave a grunt and rang it up.
He handed her the change and grabbed at her arm. “What’s your name?”
“Does it matter?” The guy was clearly interested in one thing.
“Of course it does, baby. I’ll make you into a Queen.”
“Then call me Queenie and let me the fuck go.” She ripped from his grasp and made to leave, but he circled the counter.
What was it with today? It was destined to be a shit fest from beginning to end.
“You think you’re better than me or something?” Bald men were the worst. First Big Nick and now this guy. The plight for shaven-headed males had dwindled fast.
“No.” She held the beers and readied herself to swing. That anger had gathered again. Why couldn’t she catch a break? If it wasn’t one thing, it was another.
“Then what is it, huh? Why can’t you bitches be nice?” He shrugged his sweaty shoulders, and pumped his fists back and forth. There weren’t other customers in the back alley store, but she didn’t care.
“My Prince Charming,” she replied, with a sarcastic flutter of her eyelids, “what don’t you get? No means no. Just leave well alone.”
“Maybe I won’t take no for an answer.”
The guy was a rabid dog. He didn’t understand social graces and that six pack weighed heavily on her mind and her grip. She pictured smashing him in the face with it.
“Come here.” The clerk rushed at her and she hefted her weapon of choice. Unbelievable. What a day.
“Stop right there.” A masculine, and heart-wrenchingly familiar, voice spoke up behind her.
It was Chase.
“Who are you?” Bald Casanova asked.
“He’s nobody.” Emily turned her back on the man she loved and walked towards the exit
.
“I’m trouble,” Chase answered, and she glanced back at him. He’d extended his hand to the clerk, who took it with a dumb frown. “And you’re dead. Nice to meet you.”
Chase pulled the guy in close and brought his elbow up quick as lightning. There was a sharp crack and the clerk dropped with a muffled yell, gripping his nose.
Emily marched out and headed for her car. She didn’t need to see him today. She was vulnerable from the visit and she had to maintain that anger at his betrayal or the pain would tear her apart.
“Emily.” Footsteps rushed up behind her, but she didn’t answer. She popped the trunk and loaded her beer inside. She’d always preferred it to wine. It probably made her seem a bit hillbilly, but what the hell.
“We need to talk.”
She slammed the trunk closed. “No, we really don’t. Ever again.” A pigeon swooped past her, free in a manner she wished she could be.
“A lot of things were said.”
Emily turned on him, arms folded. “Yeah? Is that your ass backwards way of apologizing to me?”
“Why would I apologize to you?” Chase’s concern turned to dry, angry amusement.
“For lying to me about the apartment.” She ticked it off on her fingers. “For telling me Janet was just a friend. For judging me.” The last one was the worst. She was accustomed to that treatment from others, but she’d expected different from him for some reason. She was dumbass for that.
“I – I,” he paused and bit his bottom lip, and unwanted images of him naked popped into her mind, “I just wanted to check if you’re all right.”
Emily stuck the keys into the lock on her car door. “Sure, why wouldn’t I be?”
“That guy in there – ”
“Oh that?” She interrupted, opening her door, then continued, “That’s nothing. I’m used to dealing with assholes.”
The insult hit him and slid off. “Something bothering you?”
She gave an almighty sigh. There wasn’t a chance she’d tell him about her mother and the visit from hell. It was too much risk and too much vulnerability. It was over between them and they both had to embrace that.
“I’ve gotta go, Chase. I’ve got a date with a six pack and Saturday Night Live.” She placed her foot on the bottom edge of the car, just below the driver’s seat.
“Wait. Things got heated between us and I don’t want it to end this way.”
“Then what way do you want it to end? Pick one.”
Chase prickled and slammed his fist on the top of her car. “God dammit, you lied to me. I don’t even know if I can trust you anymore.”
She was so over this – her rage had reached breaking point but she wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of an explosion. It was more emotion than he deserved after Janet’s reveal.
“Then don’t.”
“What are you even saying?”
“Then don’t trust me anymore, Chase.” She shook with emotion, on vibrate from head to toe. “Don’t trust me. I don’t care anymore.”
“That’s a lie. Don’t lie to me, Emily.”
“Don’t lie to you? That your favorite joke?” She choked up then cleared her throat.
“I never lied.” He lied.
“I gave you every bit of my heart and soul, and you threw it back in my face the minute things turned tough. The minute it seemed like there was any other option but success, you turned your back on me.”
“What are you saying? I was there for you through everything. I was the one who stuck around, even when you tried to turn me away.” Chase pounded his chest.
“Yeah and that means you can treat me like dirt whenever you want. I’m indebted to you now, right? You stuck around and that automatically means I owe you one, because you put up with my drama.” It was a flashback to her ex-husband. The situations were different but the same.
“Where the hell is this coming from?”
“I’ve got to go.” She slipped into the car before he could say anything else, and shut the door with so much force that the car shuddered.
She was sick and tired of being fucked over.
Emily rolled the window down to get fresh air and Chase appeared beside her.
“You can’t run from life.”
“I’m not running from anything. I’m finally facing what I’ve got to do.”
Chase drummed his fingers on the side of her door. “And what’s that?”
“Get the hell away from you.”
She started the car and the engine thrummed to life, signifying the end of their little tiff. Chase stood slowly and stepped back from the car. He glared at her, silent for once, with that accusation in his gaze.
It was too late for them. She had to focus on what was right for her future and the future of the ones she loved. She drove out of the parking lot, refusing to look in the rear view mirror, even though she was sure he was there, watching her leave him behind.
Empty roads met her tires.
It was time to go back.
CHAPTER FIVE
Chase stood with his arms behind his back, staring out across the city from his penthouse suite. The massive window glinted in the morning sunlight, but he didn’t squint or shield his eyes.
This view was the entire reason he’d bought the place.
And now, he wanted nothing more but to sell it. The sweet memory of Emily’s presence lingered here, her scent did too.
He scraped a hand through his hair in total frustration. How was he supposed to process this?
He tried to clear his mind – he had a business meeting in an hour and he couldn’t afford distractions or it would fall through. He’d been in the business of buying and selling companies since his father had taught him, but it was never a sure thing.
Emily. There she was again. Another thing he wasn’t sure about.
She was a criminal and after his run in with lawlessness, after the death of his parents in a car accident with a drunk driver, he had no clue how to adapt to the information.
Hell, he hadn’t even bothered to find out who the drunk asshole was after the crash. It had been enough to know that they’d spent time in jail. But that vengeance was lessened with the knowledge that Emily, the woman he’d fallen for, had been in a similar position.
“Fuck.”
“What’s the matter?” Chastity strolled into the room, typing on her cell.
“Nothing.” He didn’t move from the window, but rested his palms against it instead, continuing his search of the sky rise.
He’d been hurt by Janet and he’d let his guard down with Emily. Fool.
Chastity appeared beside him and patted him on the shoulder in her awkward way. She wasn’t good with physical contact.
“It’s about that woman again. The stripper?” Chastity’s question was equally awkward.
“She wasn’t a stripper, Chas.” He finally turned and walked to the kitchen, the leather couch called out to him but he needed a cup of coffee for this day.
“What do you mean?”
“She was more than just a stripper.” He poured himself a cup of coffee and shook his head. “I don’t want to talk about this right now.”
“Honey, you need to talk about it. It’s the only way you’re going to get over her.”
Chase took a sip and massaged his temples. Did he want to get over Emily? She’d left out the bit about being a criminal, but it wasn’t like it bothered him that much. Unless she really had killed someone, of course.
It was more the fact that she’d lied to him.
But then, he’d lied to her.
Not about dating Janet, but about who she was. And the apartment. Guilt rose to the surface and he glugged more of the dark liquid.
“I was wrong to judge her about her past, when she’s never judged me.”
“No,” said Chastity, walking up to pour herself a mug as well, “you were wrong to trust someone you barely knew. But it’s understandable.”
“It is?” He wasn’t this vulnerable, he neve
r sought approval on his actions or decisions, but Emily had put him on some grand guilt trip.
“Yeah, well after what happened with Janet, but I don’t know if you should give up on that either.”
Chase put the cup in the sink and leaned against it, facing his sister.
“You crazy? Janet destroyed everything we had the minute she climbed into bed with another man.”
“Yeah, and I’m the one who let you in on that little secret, but even I don’t think you should throw away three years of a relationship over that. It’s redeemable.”
He studied her with a frown. Why was she even worried about his relationship with Janet? The two had never exactly gotten along.
“What about Emily.”
“Emily was a passing phase, brother.” Chas left her coffee mug untouched on the table and gestured wildly. “A woman of the night. She treated you as a tool rather than a lover or husband.”
“Woah, who said anything about marriage?”
His sister gave a small laugh and tossed her dark hair back over a shoulder, then straightened the black silk scarf she’d tied around her neck.
“Isn’t that what you want?”
“Marriage?” He considered it for a second. It wasn’t a foreign concept – he’d been set on proposing the night he’d discovered the truth about Janet. “I don’t know. I don’t know if I’d be able to trust again after all this.”
“Come on. You and I both know that you’re secretly longing for that romantic connection. Vous voulez que l’amour.” Chastity gave a flourish and undid her scarf for effect.
“In English this time.” Chase sighed at his sister’s eccentricities and checked his watch.
“You want love.”
He stared at her for a minute. “I want to be on time for my meeting. I’d better get going.”
“Sure, sure.” She nodded with a smile. “Just remember, that stripper girl wasn’t worth your time. You’re quality and she was trash. And Janet, well she’s on the same level as you.”
Chase strode to the front door, tying his navy blue tie and straigtening it.
“Why are you pushing so hard for her?”
“Because I know true love when I see it.” Chastity’s expression was the picture of innocent intrigue, but his belly burbled with anxiety.
Never Say Never, Part Two (Second Chance Romance, Book 2) Page 2