“What do you want, Meg?”
“You. I want you.” I reached for him, but he backed away. Frowning, I waited, praying I hadn’t overplayed my hand or, worse, that he’d been playing me for a fool.
Instead of saying anything, he knelt. His hands were gentle as they removed my boots. Carefully, he pulled off my socks and stuffed them inside the boots before setting them off to the side. Then he helped me to my feet. His lips gently caressed mine as his hands found the hem of my shirt. A moment later, he pulled it over my head. His eyes warmed as he looked at me standing there in bra and jeans. Then his expression hardened, and I bit back a curse.
Damn it, I knew it was too good to be true.
I started to reach for the tee shirt he still held. Instead of letting me, he tossed the shirt onto the floor a few feet away. The hardness of a moment earlier disappeared, replaced with concern and an anger I didn’t understand. When the fingers of one hand lightly traced the scarring at my right shoulder, I stiffened. If he hadn’t been holding me with the other hand, I would have turned away as he turned his attention to the scar running down my ribs.
“Meg, don’t. Don’t turn away.” He spoke softly. None of the revulsion I’d heard from others filled his voice. “What happened?”
“Just a reminder of my last mission for Uncle Sam.” I did my best to cover the scars, but he wouldn’t let me. He took my hands, lifting one and then the other to kiss my knuckles. Then he held my hands out from my body as he looked closely at the reminders of the injuries that had come close to killing me. “Those aren’t from IEDs or gunshots, are they?”
I shook my head. My chest burned as my lungs forgot how to work. I didn’t want to remember what happened. I didn’t want to think about it.
“Meg, look at me.” He waited until I did. The understanding and compassion in his eyes almost did me in. “The scars don’t matter. Not to me. Not unless my scars matter to you.” He turned, letting me see a long scar along his lower back that could only have come from a knife. Then he dropped his jeans and other scars, some I guessed were sports injuries and others all too reminiscent of injuries I’d seen overseas, were visible. “Do they turn you off?”
I shook my head once again.
“Then don’t think your scars do that to me.” He lowered his head and lightly kissed my scarred shoulder. “Will you tell me what happened?”
“Yes.” Just saying it felt like a weight had been lifted. “But I need you to do something for me first.”
“Anything.”
“Love me. Make me forget about the scars, at least for a little while.”
“Oh, baby.”
He held me close. Then he lifted me and carried me to the side of the bed. He placed one knee on the edge of the matter before gently settling me in the middle of the king-sized bed. He cupped my cheek and then stood, slipping out of his jeans and underwear. Instead of settling on the bed next to me, he moved to its foot and crawled up the mattress.
“No.” He gently stopped my hands when they moved to unbutton my jeans. “Let me.”
I lay my head against the pillow and closed my eyes. My world narrowed to the feel of his hands as they gently eased my jeans and then my underwear down my legs. His fingers ran up my legs, teasing and enticing. My body responded to his touch. My legs opened, inviting his fingers and more. But instead of giving me what I wanted, he continued his exploration upward until his hands cupped my lace covered breasts.
His hands slipped behind me and his fingers fumbled to release the bra. As I was about to sit up, he freed the clasps. His fingers felt electric as they guided the straps down my arms. I opened my eyes in time to see him kneel on the bed next to me.
“Roll over, sweetheart.”
“Drew?”
“Hush. You need to relax.” He helped me roll over before straddling me at the waist. “Close your eyes, Meg. Don’t think about anything except how glad I am you’re here with me.”
“Drew.” Not only was I afraid I might fall asleep if he helped me relax too much, I wanted to show him how much I wanted him. “Please.”
“You’re sure?”
“Yes.”
As he stretched out beside me, I rolled onto my side. His blue eyes looking into mine as we reached for one another. Mouths fused, hands groped and sparks flew, literally and figuratively. I moaned in need and frustration and he chuckled as he rolled me onto my back. He kissed a path from my mouth down to my right breast. My fingers dug into his back, holding him closer as his tongue teased my nipple into a taut point. A ragged breath escaped my lips and I bit down on his shoulder as his teeth scraped my nipple, tugging just painfully enough to send desire flaring through me.
His other hand gently urged me to move my legs further apart, not that I needed any encouragement. His palm cupped me, warm and inviting. Slowly, oh so slowly, his fingers moved against me. I arched against his hand, trying to guide his fingers where I wanted them.
He chuckled softly as his oh-so-talented mouth moved to my left breast. He ran his tongue over that nipple before latching on. I wanted to reach for him but when I tried, he suddenly plunged a finger into me and pumped. Desire built and my skin felt as if flames danced across it. My fingers dug into the mattress, holding on as he took me up and over.
“That’s my girl,” he whispered as he nuzzled my throat. “Just ride it, Meg. Let yourself feel.”
I couldn’t answer. I couldn’t move. All I could do was revel in the feel of his mouth as it once again claimed mine, the warmth of his body covering mine and the rhythm of his fingers as first one and then two continued to pump inside of me.
“Oh God.” It came out as a shuddering sigh as I collapsed against the mattress. I opened my eyes and saw him leaning over me, his eyes shining before he lowered his head to gently kiss me.
“And that’s just the warm-up,” he promised as he lay against the mattress and cradled me against his chest.
He had no idea.
I framed his face with my hands and kissed him. It started softly, gently. My tongue parted his lips. He groaned much as I had earlier as passion once again rose between us. This time, however, I meant to take control. He’d already given me release. Now it was his turn.
I reached between us, my hand sliding down his hard stomach and lower. He inhaled sharply. His body went taut as my fingers closed around him. He hardened under my touch and I smiled. Nothing makes a woman feel better, or more powerful, than knowing she can cause that sort of reaction in a man she cares for and I cared for Drew more than I had any other man. My fingers played him as expertly as his had me not long before. His hips bumped against me, his hands closed on my breasts, kneading and pulling. His head fell back, his mouth opened as he panted for breath.
“Meg, I can’t last much longer,” he rasped.
One hand reached out, searching for the bedside table. Understanding, I leaned over, never releasing my hold on him. I slid open the drawer and rummaged inside. A smile touched my lips when my fingers found what they were looking for.
“Give me.” Drew reached for the square and I shook my head.
“Mine.”
To keep him distracted, I slid down his body. I needed both hands to open the package without damaging its contents. But I wanted him thinking about what I might do next instead of worrying about having safe sex and there was one sure way to do that. The moment my hand released its grip on him, I leaned down and blew across the head of his penis. It twitched in reaction and a drop of precum appeared. Good, he was close. He groaned, and his hands gripped my arms as my tongue swirled around him, a tease and a promise.
“God, you’re killing me, Meg.” His chest rose and fell in rapid breaths as he watched me slowly roll the condom over him.
Smiling, I rose onto my knees. My eyes never leaving his, I reached for his hands. Our fingers linked, and I slowly took him in. As I did, my breath caught as that familiar spark between us turned to flame. Distracted, I suddenly found myself on my back with Drew on his elbo
ws above me. Grinning, I wrapped a leg around him, holding him close as we began a dance that would last longer than either of us could have anticipated.
Chapter 19
“Here you go.”
Drew handed me a mug of coffee before sitting next to me at the small kitchen table. A moment later, he pulled me onto his lap. Fortunately, I’d put the mug down before his hand found its way under the flannel shirt – one of his – I wore. The moment his fingers began playing with my nipple, coffee and everything else was forgotten except my desire for him.
“I would have thought you’d have had enough of fun and games after last night, our shower, after the shower, not to mention our second shower,” I teased even as I said a silent prayer that he hadn’t.
“I don’t think I’ll ever get enough of you, Meg.”
“Good.” I leaned down and kissed him. “But I need coffee and I promised to tell you what caused my scars.”
His hand abandoned my breast to cup my cheek. “You don’t have to.”
I shook my head. I really did and I hoped he understood. “I need to.”
I slid off his lap and padded across the kitchen. I stared out the small window over the sink. Instead of seeing his backyard, my mind pictured the desert. Once again, I felt the heat no one who hadn’t been there could imagine. The sand that scraped the skin and burned the eyes. The fear that never left you because you never knew if the next corner you turned in a village or town would lead to an ambush. The horror of finding your buddies after their transport struck an IED.
What I hadn’t expected when I received that last set of orders was to be sent to the front lines. Even though the rules about women in combat had eased over the last decade, it was still an unwritten rule that we weren’t put on the line. Not that most of us minded in that part of the world. We knew what the enemy thought about women and we knew we could be used against our male counterparts. But orders were orders and I reported as instructed.
And found myself under the command of an officer who not only had no respect for the enemy but no respect for the Others in the unit. It quickly became clear he saw us as expendable. We were sent in to clear areas without proper support or, all too often, intel. Over the next few months, more and more of our people were wounded or died as the result of such actions.
But we followed orders. We all knew or had served under other officers who simply should never have been put in command of combat troops. Because of that, we vowed to do whatever it took to survive this assignment and get home in one piece. Then came the last mission, the one that changed it all.
“You don’t have to continue, Meg. I think I have a pretty good idea what happened.” Drew slid his arms around me and drew me against him. The warmth of his bare chest penetrated the material of the shirt I wore. His hands rubbed up and down my arms, reassuring and comforting.
“Twenty-four hours ago, I couldn’t have told you.” I turned and slid my arms around his waist, holding onto him as if he were my lifeline. “We were sworn to secrecy.”
“But?”
“I made a few calls. I needed to be sure what happened there had nothing to do with the wreck. It didn’t, thank God. But, in the course of those conversations, I was told to talk to someone about what happened before it finally broke me – which it would have done sooner or later.”
He nodded and led me back to the table. This time, when he pulled me onto his lap, I stayed there. I needed to be near him, to feel him as I did this.
“Most of us in my team had retired for the night when our company CO sent for us. Said he just received good information that one of our targets had been located in a village an hour from our camp. We were to gear up and move out immediately, before the target had time to move again.”
I closed my eyes, picturing that night. Before I could say anything, our sergeant did, risking his career by not only questioning the legitimacy of the intel but also the major’s motivation. Later, as we geared up, he told each of us to be on guard. Something didn’t feel right about this. Since one of the sergeant’s talents was precog, we knew he was right. Any doubts we might have had vanished when the normals on our team were suddenly reassigned.
“Wait. Your CO only sent Others?”
I nodded. “I won’t go into all the details. They aren’t important. We made our way to the location we’d been given. Despite all the precautions we took, despite the sergeant’s warnings, it wasn’t enough. We walked into an ambush. The sarge went down but not to gunfire. The enemy had their own Others and one was an earth elemental. The ground opened up and swallowed the sergeant. I found out later it took hours for a recovery team to dig out his body.
“Conventional warfare was out the window. It was my command and I knew what we had to do. Our first goal was taking down the elemental. We lost another man doing that. He was nothing but a kid. Hell, he didn’t have to shave but once every other day.” Tears burned my eyes as the memory of Pvt. Kenny Edwards sacrificing himself to save the rest of us. We’d all felt the elemental gathering the energies around us to once again use the ground against us. Edwards had pulled the pin on a grenade and charged him. He tackled the elemental and, as they fell to the ground, yelled for the rest of us to take cover. A moment later, he was gone, another fallen hero to lay at the major’s feet.
“The shoulder wound was from a sword of all things. I was trying to call the wind to help cover our retreat when one of the enemy soldiers suddenly appeared. I had just enough warning to keep him from taking my head. One of the team got him before he could do any more damage than he already had.
“This.” I lightly touched the scar along my ribs. “Was thanks to a fire wielder. I took him down. Of the ten of us who entered the village that night, five returned. We brought out our dead, all but Sergeant Juan Colero. To say we were all injured is putting it mildly. When I woke in the hospital two days later, it was to the sight of two MPs stationed in my room. I realized then they had me cuffed to my bed.”
“What?” If I hadn’t been on his lap, Drew would have surged to his feet. I felt his muscles gathering before he forced himself to relax. “You were in custody?”
“We all were. Major Stokoe was trying to cover his ass. His story was we had acted without authorization and, in the course of our actions in the village, we had willingly killed civilians. He forgot Sergeant Colero was a precog. The sarge did one thing before we left camp that night, something none of the rest of us knew about. He’d contacted Brigadier General Wallace Cooke. He was our division CO. Unlike Stokoe, he is a man of action. The moment he learned what happened, he came to the hospital. He had one question for each of us – was what Colero told him true? When we confirmed it, he asked if we would testify against Stokoe. None of us hesitated. As quickly as we’d been arrested, we were freed and our records cleared.”
“Why didn’t the media cover this?”
“Because it never knew. The Army decided the best way to handle the situation was to make it disappear. The brass didn’t want to create possible dissention in the ranks by admitting an officer not only willingly sacrificed Others under his command but that he acted to make sure they were killed. Stokoe faced a court martial and was convicted. He won’t be getting out of military prison. The Army made sure of that. Those of us who survived the mission were sworn to secrecy, signing away not only our benefits but our freedom if we said anything without permission.”
“God, Meg, I’ve heard of such things. I’m not ashamed to say I wish someone had fragged that bastard before you were hurt.”
“Me too.” In fact, I’d dreamed of doing just that more times than I could count. I slipped my arms around his neck and rested my head against his chest. He held me close, giving me time to calm the emotions still churning so close to the surface. “You can’t tell anyone,” I whispered.
“Tell them what?”
When I looked up at him, he smiled at me. Then he ducked his head to lightly brush his lips against my forehead, my nose and then my lips. “Your
secrets will always be safe with me.”
I nodded, knowing he spoke true. Whatever the future held for us, for now he was exactly what I needed.
Before I could tell him that, his phone buzzed. At the same time the doorbell rang. Both of us froze, the memory of his mother and her friends trying to get in the night before fresh. Then he glanced at his phone where it rested on the tabletop and shook his head. When he turned it so I could see the screen, I buried my face in the crook of his neck. The world wanted in and I had a feeling this time we couldn’t stop it.
“Wait here. I’ll get rid of them,” he said as he stood and then gently settled me on the chair.
I reached for my mug of now cold coffee. Grimacing at the bitter taste – it would have been wonderful hot – I made up my mind. I’d done enough hiding. If I was really considering settling down here, I needed to step out from the shadows. That started now, with the people I felt closest to.
I moved silently through the house. As I stepped into the front hallway, I smiled at the sight that greeted me. Drew, clad only in a pair of faded, well-worn jeans, stood at the front door. He’d opened it barely more than a crack. Even though I couldn’t see who stood on the other side, the text he’d received told me all I needed to know.
“Damn it, go away. It’s too early on a Saturday for you two to be here,” Drew growled.
“Get over yourself, Drew,” Quinn laughed. “We have a date with Meg.”
“Quinn.”
Anyone should have been able to recognize the warning in his voice. My heart gave a little skip and I smiled. He wouldn’t be keeping them out if last night had been a one-night stand. Not that I’d thought it was.
“Drew, it’s all right.”
I padded to his side and opened the door. For not much more than a split second, Annie and Quinn looked from Drew to me. Then, instead of saying anything about how we were dressed or, in my case, not dressed, they simply pushed past Drew and stepped inside the house. Annie paused long enough to stand on her tiptoes to kiss her brother’s cheek.
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