by Emily Snow
“Liza?” Ben called.
“Hmm?” I answered quickly.
He looked down at me, his eyes narrowing as I placed my hands on my thighs. I could feel my cheeks burning with blood and heat, but I kept my eyes on him. “Cal said he’s looking for an artist to draw something for him for his article. It sounds like something you’d be interested in,” he said, gesturing to Cal.
“Oh.” I gulped, looking from Ben to Cal. “What would it be?”
“Oh, just some minor drawings. When writing an article for It’s Real magazine, we get to decorate our pages ourselves, but it has to match the topic. Since my article will be based on the band and music, I’d gather a ton of drawings of guitars, microphones, creative music notes… maybe even cartoon characters that are singing. I’d make it spiffy, fun.” He smiled.
I nodded. “I can help with that.”
Cal winked. “That’d be great, Eliza.” He and Ben started talking about a bunch of junk I didn’t really care about again, and I sighed heavily, reaching for my glass of apple juice to kill the fire that still seemed to be burning inside of me… because of Gage Grendel.
I dared a look at him and his fingers were folded on top of the table. He was leaning his back against his seat, a smirk on his lips, staring ahead. I wasn’t sure what at, but as I looked up, I figured it out.
A girl with blond hair, a tight miniskirt, and a purple belly shirt stood at the entrance, staring directly at Gage. She batted her eyelashes at him a few times and then winked as she stepped around the corner to get to the restrooms. Was that her gesture to get him to come after her?
What surprised me most was that it worked because, clearing his throat, Gage pushed from the table and slid in his chair. No one else seemed to notice he was walking toward the restrooms but me, and that’s only because the stunt he pulled was really ignorant and disgusting.
I couldn’t stand it. I couldn’t stand how he could make me catch on fire one second, but then right after he’d find someone else to give his attention. It confused me and I was pissed I felt anything toward him. I didn’t want to feel anything because feelings hurt. I had to shut off my damn emotions and continue acting like I didn’t care. I knew he was only going to continue.
Gage disappeared around the corner and didn’t return for a whole fifteen minutes. No one at the table happened to notice he hadn’t come back yet… no one but me, anyway. I knew what he was doing in the restrooms, most likely in a stall with the blond whore he knew nothing about. How could he just do that to himself? What if she carried a disease? I knew he was low, but I didn’t think he would go as low as having sex with a completely random girl.
Everyone finished up their meals and as soon as we all stood and pushed in our chairs, out came Gage fixing his red T-shirt and jeans. His hair was mussed, way messier than just a few minutes ago, and he looked worn, as if he’d just worked out. Gage saw us getting ready to leave so he headed for the exit. As I stepped past the restrooms, the random blond whore was stepping out, applying lip-gloss to her lips curved into a satisfied smile. Un-fucking-believable.
“Oh shit!” Montana yelled from the knick-knack area. I turned to see him holding up a large Tootsie Roll pop. He pretended to lick it and I laughed as I stepped in, forgetting all about Gage and his gross bathroom scandal.
“Can I get a picture of you with that?” I asked.
“Anything for you, Miss Eliza.” He winked. I lifted my camera off of my chest and he posed, holding the Tootsie pop against him, as if he were a kid. I giggled as I snapped two and then pulled the camera from my eye.
“So, Eliza…” Montana sighed, putting down the lollipop. “Do you have a boyfriend?”
I shook my head quickly. “No.”
“Why not?”
“I don’t know.” I shrugged. “I’m really picky, I guess. He has to be worth dating.”
Montana snorted a laugh before picking up a hand-sized water gun. “So, in other words, you’re waiting on a guy you know you’ll want to marry. You’re that kind of chick? Old-fashioned?”
I blinked quickly because he was right on… sort of. “Kind of.” I lied. The truth was yes, but it was way too early for me to be thinking about marriage, which was why I was taking my time on dating. There was no rush. I had plenty of time.
“Sounds like you wouldn’t give anyone on this tour a chance, then,” he said, stepping toward me and licking his lips.
“That’s a definite no.” I laughed as I took a step away.
“But what if one of us is willing to take the dive for you? I mean, it may not be right now exactly, but in the future.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “What are you getting at, Montana?”
“I’m not saying me,” he said, raising his hands innocently. “I’m just saying… maybe I know someone who would be a good match for you.”
I laughed as I scanned the shop. Everyone was looking at different things. Roy and Deed sorted through old-fashioned guitar picks and Gage messed with candy bars and candles. Ben was still talking to Cal about God knows what, and the other miscellaneous people of the crew were waiting by the door, checking their watches and phones, ready to go.
“I highly doubt anyone here is a match for me,” I finally said, looking at Montana again.
“What about Gage?” he asked, lifting his eyebrows and pointing his thumb toward him. “ We’ve talked about this before and I see the way he looks at you, the way you look at him. I wish you two would just fuck and get it over with already. The wait is killing me and I’m not even getting any ass.”
“Hmm… no thanks. I’ve literally just gotten to know him and he’s most likely unsanitary, inside and out.”
Montana laughed obnoxiously. “Eliza, I’m pretty sure any guy that’s a part of a band is naturally unsanitary. We like to get dirty. Being clean is for the birds.” He waved his hand, slightly rolling his eyes.
“Well, dirty isn’t my thing. I like clean men,” I said matter-of-factly, picking up a strawberry-flavored lollipop.
“So you like douchebags like Cal over there?” he grumbled.
“Cal’s sweet,” I said, glancing over my shoulder to find him. He was talking to another crewmember.
Montana sighed, as if he were bored with me. “Being sweet is the new bitter.”
“Oh, really?” I placed a hand on my hip. “So what’s being rude, then? What’s being a jerk? An asshole? I hope you aren’t going to make it a reference to being sweet or cool because it isn’t.”
“Hey, no one said anything about being rude. I’m a pretty nice guy. I just like to have fun and the girls I come across don’t realize that. I’m still young. I still have a life to live. I’m pretty sure my band brothers feel the exact same way. We aren’t settlers. We just take whatever life hands us and run with it.”
“Even when life hands you a random broad to fuck in the bathroom?” I countered.
He chuckled, running a hand over his slick mohawk. “You caught that, too, huh? Gage thinks he’s the sneakiest bastard alive. I swear he does.”
“It’s gross. He didn’t even know her.”
“Which is the best part. When he doesn’t know her, he doesn’t have to worry about seeing her again, and if he does, he can pretend they’ve never met. We’re constantly on the move, Eliza. We see so many faces that it all becomes a blur. That’s one thing you have to understand. We don’t have time to care for feelings outside our own. It’s hard to really give a fuck about anyone but ourselves,” he said, his tone nonchalant.
I sighed, turning around to get to the exit. “Well, I guess what people say about rockers is true.”
“And what might that be?” Montana asked, catching up to me.
“Rockers are selfish and filthy fuckers—at least, that’s what I always hear. I used to think it was a stereotype, but the more I’m around you boys, the more I think maybe it’s the truth.” Montana chuckled and I couldn’t help but laugh with him. At least he wasn’t denying his ways. I could respect that.
“You don’t need to worry, Eliza. You’re off limits to all of us anyway. You’re around us too much and we see you every day, so if any one of us even takes the dare to try and have sex with you, we wouldn’t be getting off so easily. Unlike the other girls where we can kick them out or even leave them without an excuse, you get to stay and we’ll have to make one up for you and… well… that’s just too much damn work. None of us wants to be nagged, so you’re safe around us—plus, you’re our manager’s daughter. Couldn’t do you like that.”
I frowned as we stepped outside and Montana placed his dark sunglasses over his eyes. “Is that really how the band sees me? As a girl they know they shouldn’t have sex with?”
“Not exactly that way, but somewhere near that. I’d rather have you as a buddy. I’m not sure about everyone else… especially Gage. He’s been getting so close to you that it might just happen one day or another,” he teased. “Gage will take the nagging as long as he’s scored himself some pussy.”
“Number one: I don’t nag,” I said, laughing. “And number two: I would never have sex with Gage after being a witness to him having sex in a public restroom with a girl he doesn’t even know.”
“Whatever you say, Miss Eliza.” He shrugged, sighing. “There’s always something that’ll get a person to crack. Gage is a wise man when it comes down to it. He’ll get a chick to crack in a heartbeat. He enjoys the chase.”
“I think you’ve failed to realize that I’m not like the chicks you and Gage mess around with. I’m far from it, actually.”
“How far?” he tempted.
“Pretty far.”
“Mm-hmm…” He smirked, looking me over beneath his sunglasses. “Tell that to me at the end of the tour. You’re still a girl. You still have desires… needs.”
“Are we making a bet over Gage and my vagina?”
“How much are you willing to put on it?” he inquired, grinning slyly.
“I wouldn’t put anything on my precious vagina because I know, in the end, he wouldn’t be worth it.”
“Who wouldn’t be worth what?” Gage’s voice bellowed behind me.
My heart stilled and I refused to look back. Instead, I stared straight ahead at Montana who’d just looked from Gage to me, his smile confident. “Yeah. Even though there’s no money on it, I know I’m gonna win this bet,” he said before turning around and walking off.
“What’s that clown talking about?” Gage asked, stepping around to get in front of me.
“Uh… nothing,” I muttered. He folded his arms across his chest and the ink stretched over his sculpted muscles.
“So you are intrigued by blonds,” he said.
My eyes narrowed. “How?”
“Well, Cal has blond hair. Montana… I’m just putting two and two together here, Ellie.”
“You’re obviously attracted to blonds as well,” I quipped.
He raised an eyebrow. “How so?”
“In bathrooms of Cracker Barrel.”
“You’re upset about that?”
“No,” I lied. “And do you have any respect?”
Gage’s features fell, his smile evaporating. I thought for a moment he was going to give in and say yes—that maybe he was going to apologize—but he didn’t. Instead, he said, “I have more respect for myself now than I’ve ever had before. I think I’ve accomplished a lot in the past four years.” He ran a hand through his hair, looking at the rest of the band standing by the truck. “Maybe you should listen to Montana. He’s right.”
“Ugh.” I shook my head. “You were listening?”
He chuckled, lowering his head. “It wasn’t hard to figure out you two were talking about me. You wouldn’t stop looking at me.” He laughed. “And besides, you should take notes from him. I’ll get you to crack and open up one day… and you’re gonna love the hell out of me for it, too.” A cocky smirk formed on his lips as he scanned me from head to toe.
I placed a hand on my hip, not daring to back down. I knew he was trying to get under my skin, but I wasn’t having it. “You know what I think?” I asked rhetorically. Gage folded his arms, still smirking. “I think you only do your nasty charades in public for show. You want someone to pay attention to you—someone to tell you how wrong you are so you can laugh at them.” I folded my arms, pressing my lips. “I think you only do it so you won’t have to bother yourself with reality—so you can have a little laugh—but deep down, it’s not what you really want. You’re not as careless as you claim to be.”
For a moment, shock overtook Gage’s face. His mouth hung open slightly and his eyes grew a little wider, but in a snap he clamped his mouth shut and took a step back, placing his sunglasses over his eyes. “Don’t pretend you know anything about me,” he muttered. “You don’t and you never will.” His jaw ticked, proving maybe I was right about him. No one would get that upset unless I spoke the truth. And the truth hurts.
“I’m right, aren’t I?” I asked. My eyes narrowed as I aimed to look deeply into his eyes.
“Far from it, Sweet Ellie.” I could tell he was lying. He was no longer looking at me.
“Yeah.” I scoffed. “Whatever.” I began to turn around, but before I could completely, Gage grabbed my arm and spun me back. I landed between his arms and as I tried to pull away, he held on tighter. One of his hands slid down my hips and I bit my bottom lip, trying my hardest to not moan or hitch my breath.
Gage then placed his plush lips on my ear. Tingles ran down my spine and I bit my fingers into the back of his shirt, shutting my eyes briefly, instinctively breathing him in.
“Stop fighting and make it easier on yourself,” he murmured in my ear. “You want me. I see it. I feel it.”
My lower belly sparked with heat that ran down and puddled between my legs. Ugh, I wanted to melt all over.
“Let’s just settle this when we get back to the buses. Maybe it’ll get you to stop denying me. And I think it’ll make you happy, just like it did whatshername in there.” He pulled away from me and pointed over my shoulder at Cracker Barrel, a small smirk tugging on the corner of his upper lip.
I scowled, yanking away from him and giving the middle finger before storming for the truck.
What an asshole.
WAR
I despised Gage in every way.
Every time we’d go out, he’d have a different girl on his arm—making out with her, holding her, nuzzling her neck. He’d do it right in front of me. I tried ignoring him, but after a while I realized he was running into me on purpose.
We’d all split up during our free time at the mall and were going to meet at the food court in two hours max, but somehow Gage would always find me and do something explicit with his skank in public. I would continuously scowl at him and brush past him, and each time he would chuckle to purposely get under my skin. I refused to allow him to get to me.
I’d done some shopping around in a bookstore, a department store where I found a really cute red blouse, and then headed to the food court early, hoping I wouldn’t run into Gage again. Surprisingly, Montana, Roy, and Deed were already sitting at a table in the middle, surrounded by a cluster of females. I rolled my eyes, trudging forward and pushing my way through, the struggle comparable to punching bricks, just to squeeze in. None of the girls budged until Montana saw me, stood, and grabbed my arm to reel me in. He pushed some girls out of the way for me and I thanked him with my eyes, smiling half-heartedly.
“Thanks,” I sighed, sitting beside him.
“Always, Miss Eliza.” He winked. The boys reached over the table to sign a few things for the wild girls and even took a few pictures with them until Deed gave a signal to one of the security guards. They bustled their way through, pushing some of the girls back and telling them the boys weren’t giving any more autographs. A few of them pouted their bottom lips and turned away, but some stayed, staring from a distance. The security guards shook their heads, folding their arms.
“Sorry about that.” Montana sighed, fixi
ng his spiky mohawk. “The ladies tend to get a little crazy over our asses.”
I laughed. “I see.”
I looked at Roy and Deed, but they were staring off, their eyebrows knitted. Deed finally looked at Roy, cocking his head to his left, and Roy nodded, standing from his seat as if he’d been waiting the entire time for the gesture. Deed stood and they went two tables down to sit. I frowned, glaring at them. What the fuck was their problem?
“Why the hell are they being like that?” I snapped at Montana.
He held up his hands innocently, his light-blue eyes wide, his eyebrow and lip piercings sparkling from the sunlight spilling in from above. “Hey… don’t get mad at me. I have no clue what those fuckers’ problems are. We all know Roy can be a dick, but Deed… I don’t know what’s been up his ass.”
I sighed, dropping my hands in my lap. I was about to say something else about them, but then a girl screamed, “HOLY FUCKING HELL! IT’S GAGE FUCKING GRENDEL! OH MY GOD, I THINK I’M GONNA DIE!”
The ladies standing near the security guards squealed as they rushed for him. The security guards bustled forward, guarding Gage before he could get trampled. I wouldn’t have felt bad for him or the blond skank on his arm if they were to get bulldozed. It would’ve given me something to laugh about. The skank smirked, knowing she didn’t have to fight like they did to get his attention. She knew she had him and none of them could take him… but of course it was only for the moment.
Gage signed a few things for the raging girls and pulled away from the skank who looked defeated as he kissed one girl on the cheek while a friend took a picture. She grinned again, though, after he stepped back and hooked his arm around her. Gage gave the signal to the guards and they stepped in, backing up the girls.
As he and the skank started coming our way, my heart thudded. His eyes were hard on me, his head tilted, a smirk on his lips. I wanted to smack it off his annoyingly beautiful face. I wanted to slap her for being so silly, knowing she wasn’t getting anything out of it in the end. I prayed they wouldn’t sit across from me, but when they did, I lowered my head. Gage pulled the skank in close, grinning at her before looking at Montana.