by Emily Snow
Without thinking, I picked up my wine with a flourish, intending to punctuate my rebuttal with a dramatic final sip, when Trip intercepted my glass on the way to my lips with a, “Whoa there, pardner. I think it’s time to cash in our chips.”
“I’m fine.”
“Layla. You’re defending Barry Manilow with a vengeance. I wouldn’t exactly say you’re ‘fine’.”
I resisted the urge to belt into “I Write the Songs” and instead let Trip lead me out of the party.
On the way through the living room, I saw Shelly, still sitting on the sofa surrounded by her entourage. I broke from Trip’s grasp and walked right over to her, pointedly interrupting whatever lame conversation she was in the middle of.
“Hey, Shelly,” I said, loudly enough to cause her to flinch. She looked surprised to see me there and I could practically see her feathers ruffle. I put a genuine smile on my face and said, “It was good to see you again. Thanks for letting me crash your party.”
Shelly looked genuinely flummoxed by my friendliness, and was only able to stammer out, “Oh. Okay. Goodnight.”
Then I addressed the rest of the group. “Bye, girls! Have a good night.”
I could see the shock on their faces and realized my niceties had sent them into a tailspin even moreso than had I knocked their leader down a peg. Trip didn’t seem to notice as he put a hand under my arm and ushered me out the door.
Once in his truck, I started to get the spins. Jeez, what the heck did the Ferrantes put in that wine?
Trip barreled down the road and I thought I was going to toss my cookies. But we managed to make it back to my house without incident.
He escorted me out of the truck, but I broke free from his grasp in order to make my ritualistic lunge for a leaf off my tree. I guessed drunkenness wasn’t even going to help cure my OCD. On the third try, I still hadn’t managed to nab one and almost lost my footing upon my landing. Trip laughed as he balanced me back on my feet, then jumped up and grabbed one for me, handing it over and saying, “You have problems.”
Tell me about it.
He walked me to the house, then asked, “You gonna be okay?”
I laughed and answered, “Yeah. I’m sure I’ll be just fine.” I leaned against my front door, looking up at his cobalt eyes, watching him watch me with amusement, and just launched in. “Hey- so, I gotta ask you... What was this tonight? Why the sudden urge to play nice?”
He dropped his head and answered, “Oh, I don’t know, Lay.”
He plucked the leaf from my hand, turning it over in his own, inspecting it with rapt attention. He massaged the back of his neck with his free hand, saying, “You know what? That’s not true. I know exactly why.”
He let out a deep breath, raised his head and said, “I was lying when I said my being on stage tonight was no big deal.” His eyes got this faraway look in them, like he was talking to someone floating over my left shoulder. “Lay, I never felt anything like that before. I can’t explain it. It was... amazing.” He ran a hand through his golden hair, then placed the leaf back in my hand, sandwiching it between his palms. “When I saw you backstage and realized you’d seen it, I was so... grateful. Grateful that you’d come there to share that with me. I knew I missed you, but I’d been so stubborn about it for so long... I don’t know. It... I guess it felt more real having you be a part of it. You know?”
Actually, I did know. But Jesus, it felt awesome to hear him say something like that to me.
“I have a confession to make,” I said, warily meeting his eyes, watching as he waited with bated breath for me to say something, anything that would validate him spilling his guts. “I didn’t know you were in the play until the curtains opened.”
Trip looked crestfallen, so I quickly added, “No, no. I’m so glad I was there, too! It was... It was just such a... such an unexpected surprise.”
I met his eyes just then, the months of anguish and separation just falling away. He put a hand at my neck, leaned in and whispered, “Surprises are good,” before giving me a sweet, soft kiss on the corner of my mouth.
Needless to say, my insides turned to mush and my heart threatened to escape from my ribcage, even just from that small contact of his lips against my skin. But even still, I headed inside disappointed. I’d thought there was the slightest chance he was going to actually kiss me, but I guessed my drunken state and Dorito breath weren’t really the biggest aphrodisiacs.
I leaned against the closed door and took a huge breath, trying to get some air back into my lungs. I grabbed a glass of water on my way up to my room, where there were five messages from Lisa on my machine.
Chapter 24
IMPROMPTU
I don’t think the sun could have been shining any brighter that next morning. At least my throbbing head didn’t think so. What a lightweight! Three stinking glasses of wine and I was actually suffering a bit of a hangover.
So, when my phone started ringing, I grabbed it off the hook quickly before my ears could explode.
“Hello?” My voice didn’t even sound like my own.
“LAYLA! OH MY GOD!”
I held the receiver away from my ear, cursing first into my pillow, then next at Lisa. “Christ, Lis! Why are you yelling?”
Lisa didn’t even acknowledge my blasting head and proceeded to launch into the details of her night with Pickford. “He said he loved me, Layla! On our way backstage last night, he just grabbed my hand and whispered ‘I love you’ into my ear! I couldn’t believe it!”
I removed the pillow from my head, sat up and checked my face in the mirror above my dresser. Not good.
“Layla, are you listening? Pickford told me he loved me!”
I gave my skull a good shake and finally tuned in to what my friend was saying. I’d known that Pick had held off saying those three little words throughout the entirety of their relationship. He always explained that he’d never said it to any girl before and he wasn’t planning on just throwing something like that around. I knew it infuriated Lisa, but she always made it seem like it was no big deal.
I guess, of course, until he actually said it.
“Lisa, that’s amazing. I’m so happy for you guys.” I fluffed up my pillows and sank back into them. “So, what, are you guys back together?”
Lisa gave a dreamy sigh on her end. “Yeah. I guess so.”
I didn’t want to rain on her parade, but it’s not like their situation had suddenly changed. “But what about, you know, California?”
She was silent for a moment, then tried to sound chipper as she answered, “Well, we talked about it a lot last night and I mean, Pickford’s right. Why wouldn’t we at least make the most our time until he leaves for school? I mean, August is still three months away. Why wouldn’t we just stay together until then?”
It was the first sensible thing she’d said in regards to her relationship with Pickford- a point of view I’d tried to convince her of myself during their seemingly premature breakup- but I wondered why she’d suddenly seen the light. “Why now, Lis? What’s so different this time?”
She gave me an impatient, “Duh. I’ve been an idiot, okay? I admit it. I was an idiot. There. Are you happy?” She started laughing, and I couldn’t help but laugh along with her.
I sure as hell wasn’t looking forward to part two of The Big Breakup all over again in August, however.
Her tone changed, so I knew what was coming next. “So... On to more important business. WHAT HAPPENED WITH TRIP?”
I didn’t even know where to start. We’re friends again? I know I’m still in love with him? It’s okay that he’s not in love with me?
But I opted for the more evasive route. “We’re okay. We had a really great time last night. He took me to the wrap party and I got drunk off the Ferrantes’ homemade wine. I have the worst hangover!”
She laughed at that, saying, “Jeez. The theatre fags throw one hell of a party, huh?”
I reminded her that her boyfriend’s sister was a “thea
tre fag”, and could have just let the whole subject go at that. But something didn’t feel quite right about it. I laughed and said, “Actually, a few of them were really nice. Heather’s an absolute sweetheart.”
Lisa surprised the hell out of me when she said, “Oh, yeah. Blonde girl, right? Kind of Mary Ingalls? Oh my God! We should set her up with Sargento! Wouldn’t they look so cute together?”
Definitely not the reaction I was expecting. But her suggestion wasn’t completely off the mark.
Before I could respond, she blurted out, “Oh, hey. I’ve gotta go. I told Pickford I’d go to church with him this morning. I’ll call you back later, okay?”
Church? Who was this person and what had she done with my best friend?
I stuttered, “Uh, o-okay. I’ll talk to you later. Bye.”
I checked the clock on my nightstand and saw that it was past ten. I knew it was my God-given right as a teenager to sleep the day away, but I’d always been an early riser, and ten was actually a pretty late wakeup hour for me. I got out of bed, deciding that a shower would make me feel a little more like myself again.
I was lathering up my hair, belting out “Weekend in New England”, psychically willing Trip to call. It was like five months ago all over again, but this time... Well... this time, I wasn’t planning on being a complete moron.
I was, however, only wearing a towel when I walked out of the bathroom and saw Trip at the bottom of the stairs talking to my father.
Our eyes met for only a second before I darted into my bedroom and slammed the door. I heard Dad say, “Well, I guess she was awake after all!” Then he laughed and yelled up to me, “Layla! Trip’s here. Please put some clothes on before coming down.”
Oh my God I could have just killed the man.
I stubbed my toe on my bed in my haste to get dressed, but managed to throw on a khaki miniskort and black tanktop through the pain. I toweled off my hair and finger-combed it, hoping I didn’t look like a drowned rat on my way down the stairs to see Trip.
He was sitting at the kitchen table, making smalltalk with Dad when I walked in casually, as if I hadn’t just been caught half-naked only five minutes before. “Hey, Trip. ‘Morning, Dad.”
I gave my father a kiss on the cheek and poured myself a cup of coffee as Dad excused himself to the garage.
Before I could even take a seat, Trip asked, “How’s the hangover?”
I just about dropped the sugar onto the floor. “Oh, God, Trip. Was I a completely wasted mess last night?”
He sat back and smirked at me, this gorgeous boy sitting in my kitchen. “Nah. But you were definitely in rare form.”
I brought my mug over to the table and sat down. But before the coffee had even hit my lips, he said, “Hey. Slam that thing down, we’ve got somewhere to be at twelve.”
I lowered my mug just enough to give him a perplexed look over the top of it. “Where’re we going?”
He grinned and said, “Just shut up and finish getting yourself ready. I’ll meet you out front when you’re done.”
I sank back into my chair and crossed my feet at the ankles, fitting them between two of the seats in front of me. The Loews Theater had just undergone a major renovation, turning its three screen, rinkydink movie house into a massive, sprawling ten-plex. Trip and I were in one of the newer theaters on the second floor, and I was enjoying the new, reclining seats they’d upgraded with plush leatherette and cupholders.
I grabbed the Diet Coke from mine and took a big sip from the straw. I was still feeling a tad dehydrated, and the soda was ice-cold and hitting just the right spot.
Trip had dragged me there to catch a matinee. Loews always reserved one theater to show classic movies on Saturday and Sunday afternoons; I’d seen Sound of Music on that same screen over the holidays, trying to get my mind off Trip at the time by losing myself in one of my all-time, favorite flicks. I thought it was fate or irony or whatever that I was sitting there at that moment not only with him, but while watching Franco Zeffirelli’s Romeo and Juliet.
Mrs. Mason had originally intended to show it to us during class, but the nuns in the library had “lost” the video. Rumor had it that some scenes were pretty racy, and we figured the sisters had tossed it on a bonfire during a book-burning ceremony or something.
The movie turned out to be really interesting. I’d never seen it before. It was probably the first film that I didn’t get to say smugly, “The book was better”, as I’d started to share Trip’s opinion of Shakespeare and realized that a lot of his writing was tedious, boring and hard to understand in its outdated speech.
But seeing his words play out onscreen was an entirely different animal. The visuals were beautiful, the costumes were gorgeous. The guy who played Romeo was pretty cute, too, so that was simply a bonus.
When it got to our scene, Trip gave me a nudge, saying, “Here we go,” and I laughed while trying to concentrate on the screen.
Watching a movie with Trip wasn’t like watching it with a normal person. He kept talking through the whole scene, pointing out how we should have done ours differently, gone with our original costume idea, changed the dialogue, filmed it in another location, etc. I was trying to tune him out. Up until that point, I’d just been content to watch a professional director’s version of the film, without even thinking to compare it to ours. There was Trip, criticizing almost every decision we’d made. Finally, I couldn’t take it anymore.
“Trip, I happen to like our film. I thought it was great and everyone else did, too.” I lowered my voice and added, “Obviously, it’s not as good as this, but can you please just shut up and let me watch the movie?”
I gave a huff, crossed my arms and turned my attention back to the screen.
And that’s when a handful of popcorn bounced off my face and scattered across my lap.
Chapter 25
CLASS ACTION
Trip and I didn’t have much time to spend together over the following couple of weeks. After the prom- which Trip refused to attend for reasons unbeknownst to me- the partying had been put on hold as everyone readied for final exams. Everyone was hit with a case of senioritis, just riding out the minutes until graduation. The days seemed to be flying by so fast at a time I would have rather had everything come to a standstill.
It was scary to think that those were the official final days of my childhood, that I was going to be expected to grow up, go off to school and figure out what I was going to do with the rest of my life. I was pretty stressed out about the whole thing, but did my best to push all those thoughts to the back of my mind for the time being.
Graduation was the first week in June and the weather that Tuesday was looking pretty iffy. No one wanted it to rain, forcing the ceremony inside. Everyone kept their fingers crossed that the weather would hold out just long enough for us to get our diplomas and get to Rymer’s afterparty without getting drenched.
Thankfully, aside from a few drizzly raindrops, our commencement ceremony went off without a hitch, and by the time it was over, the sun had actually peeked through for a brief instance before nightfall.
Kuman Royal was our salutatorian and he managed to bore everyone with an uninspiring speech. The boy had been a robot from the time that he was born, so I guessed all that studying didn’t allow him to hone his people skills to the hilt.
But then Heather Ferrante took the podium as valedictorian and just rocked the place.
She spoke a lot about “who we were”, ticking off our collective memories about talent shows and sporting events and favorite teachers, her mention of Mrs. Catannia bringing a few hoots and wolf whistles from the male members of the audience (as she was the original cougar/TILF/thing-we-had-no-official-name-for at the time), and her reference to the day when Rymer downed a record-setting fourteen frenchbread pizzas in the cafeteria brought about a collective laughing fit, while Rymer stood up and took a bow.
But when she started talking about “who we are” and “who we will be”, the audience se
ttled down in order to absorb every word. She talked about our hopes and our goals and about how scary it was going to be to start anew all over again. That we were, in fact, the future and that that responsibility shouldn’t be taken lightly. But it was when she was wrapping up her big speech and said- and these words have stayed with me throughout my life- “We know what we are, but know not what we may be” -that I noticed a lump in my throat. For the slightest moment, you could hear a pin drop, but then everyone got over their sappy sentimentality as the place erupted in applause.
After the ceremony, we spent some time milling about, saying congratulations to one another and taking pictures. Lisa pointed out the shiny, black corvette in the parking lot sporting a big, red bow; a gift to some lucky, spoiled graduate being presented all showy like in some tacky movie.
I gave Mrs. Mason a high-five on my way out to the oval lawn, who took the opportunity to offer some parting words of wisdom as she smiled, winked and said, “Give ‘em hell, Layla.”
Trip was standing with his parents, so I went over to say hello. His face lit up when he saw me. “Layla! Hey, come meet my sister!”
I was introduced to Claudia Wilmington, in town from San Diego for the auspicious occasion. I knew that she was twenty-three and had been living out in California since she was eighteen, never having moved back in with her nomadic family after college.
I also knew that she was living with her girlfriend, and that her parents didn’t have any clue about it.
I said hello to everyone, and Mrs. Wilmington was her usual chipper self, smoothing a hand over Trip’s hair, trying to ready him for a photo. His father was friendly enough, but he seemed distracted as if he had somewhere else more important to be instead of at his only son’s graduation. But they both said hello pleasantly, and Mr. Wilmington told me to get next to Trip for a picture, so I sidled up and threw my arm over his shoulder. Trip flashed me one of his evil grins and then scooped me up in his arms, the both of us cracking up as his father snapped the photo.