“Come on,” Damon drawled. “You know I won’t let anything happen to you. I’ll be right there with you the whole time. Hell, it might even be fun.”
“I might find that comforting,” she shot back, “if not for the fact that your idea of fun is completely warped.”
“Well, then, forget about me. Look at it this way. Wouldn’t you like to be the girl who saves the world?”
“You know what I’d like?” She pushed her hair back from her face and let out a shaky breath of air. “For once, I’d like to be the girl having a good time. Is that so freaking much to ask?”
Before Damon could respond, Noah came back into the room, his scowl even darker than it had been before. “We need to get back on the road.”
“Where are we going?” they asked in unison.
“Kierland thinks this place in Sampson sounds like a good idea, so they’re going to meet us there.”
Damon shot him a wary glance. “Who’s going to meet us there?”
“My friends.”
“Would these be your vampire and shape-shifter friends?” Damon asked, sounding less than thrilled.
Crossing his arms over his chest, he said, “One and the same. And we can’t forget about Seth, who’s human. He used to be a Collective officer, but he’s one of us now.” Noah narrowed his eyes. “You got a problem with that?”
“Not at all,” Damon replied with a grimace. “Sounds like a blast. But I’m not the one you need to worry about.”
“Meaning?”
“Meaning your friends aren’t going to be too keen on working with a demon.”
Noah snorted. “They might hate you for being a pain in the ass, but they’re not going to hold that little blue streak in your hair against you.”
“Watch your mouth,” Damon said with a sharp smile, rolling up off the bed. “There’s nothing little about my streak.”
Willow knew a good time to interrupt when she heard one, so she asked, “If they’re traveling there now, do they expect me to take part in the ritual with Damon?”
“No,” he grunted, his gaze sliding away as he grabbed his bag. “They might have a lead on a possible candidate in South America. One of the guys is flying down to see if he can locate the woman.”
Pushing his hands in his pockets, Damon gave a low whistle. “Guess this means Low might be off the hook.”
“I don’t care what they find down there,” Noah muttered. “Will was never on the hook for this job, and she won’t be put on the hook for it, either.”
“Really?” Damon raised his eyebrows and rocked back on his heels. “And why’s that? You planning on divesting her of her virginity before we get there?”
Willow held her breath as she waited for his reply. But it never came. He just stood there, staring at the demon, a predatory force of violence pouring off him that made her shiver. Then he turned his head, and the look he gave her shot a wave of heat through her body that was so scalding, she felt the roots of her hair go damp. She wondered what was going through his mind as he dropped that blistering gaze to her mouth, then lower, to the base of her throat, where her pulse was beating a crazy, frantic rhythm.
Then he tore his gaze away, threw his bag over his shoulder and walked out of the room without ever saying a damn thing.
Damon’s voice was soft, but she still flinched from the demon’s quiet words as he said, “I’m guessing that’s a no.”
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
NOAH DID HIS BEST to stay focused as they headed down the highway toward Carterville, a little town in Illinois where he’d agreed to pick up Ashe Granger, before making their way over to Kansas. But it was impossible. He knew he should send Willow packing. Knew it was the best thing he could do for her. But…he just couldn’t do it.
Despite how pissed he was at her, she still made him feel…right. Made him feel, for the first time in forever, as if he had a chance of fighting this thing. At the same time, she irritated him more than any other being alive. Drove him crazy with her smart-ass mouth and her crooked smiles. With her secrets and her attitude. But he’d never wanted a woman more.
And he didn’t know what he was supposed to do with that knowledge. No matter what happened with Calder and the Casus, he couldn’t deny that he was becoming something that wasn’t completely human. How would she feel if those changes became more obvious? Would she finally look at him as if he was a monster? And how in God’s name would he be able to handle it if that day ever came?
He wouldn’t. He’d go out of his friggin’ mind.
And he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t tempted to drag her little ass into the nearest hotel room he could find and show her just how badly he wanted her. Probably not the brightest idea he’d ever had, but he felt compelled to do everything in his power to forge a connection between them. One that couldn’t be broken, no matter how many miles eventually separated them.
And he really did not want her to be a virgin. He wanted that issue resolved, so that no one got any more crazy-ass ideas about using her to kill the Death-Walkers. He was being selfish, yeah, but he couldn’t help it. Who knew what would happen during the ceremony for the spell? No matter how important it was, he couldn’t let her risk her life like that. And that was just another item that could be added to the growing list of things he couldn’t do.
Couldn’t make her leave.
Couldn’t get thoughts of sex out of his head.
Couldn’t let her risk her life.
Couldn’t think straight for a goddamn minute.
Needing a way to unwind before he stressed himself into a stroke, he reached into the compartment on the truck door for his cigarettes, then grabbed his lighter.
“Isn’t it a little early in the day to be sucking down a cigarette?” Willow’s voice was barely more than a whisper, no doubt to keep from waking the demon snoozing in the backseat.
“It’s never too early,” he rasped, taking an angry drag that burned his lungs.
“You know, if you’d asked,” she said, her voice getting a little louder, “I could have told you that I don’t care for the smell of smoke.”
He rolled his window down, then slid her a dry look. “Better?”
“It’ll do,” she grumbled, the sunlight that was streaming in through the windshield glinting against the ornate surface of the cross hanging around her neck. After what had happened at the bar, he’d decided that morning to give the Marker to Will, knowing he’d feel better if she was wearing the talisman. She hadn’t wanted to wear it, arguing that he needed its protection more than she did, but she’d finally relented after he’d threatened to dump the damn thing in his bag and leave it there.
When he finished his cigarette, he checked the clock on the console and said, “We should be there in about twenty minutes.”
“We’re making good time,” she murmured, sounding bored with the mundane conversation. Hell, she was probably bored of the long drive. Unlike yesterday, there’d been none of the easy banter or laughter that they’d shared during the trip. Damon’s presence was part of the problem, the demon’s smart-ass interference making it impossible to have a simple conversation. And the angry frustration simmering just beneath the surface of their relationship, or friendship, or whatever you wanted to call it, wasn’t helping, either.
But there were a few things that needed to be said, before they met up with Ashe, so he stopped stalling and got on with it.
“I know you’re probably not crazy about working with a vamp, but Ashe is a good guy. I want you to cut him some slack.”
She slid him a sideways look through those golden curls and laughed. “Don’t worry, Noah. I promise not to pick a fight with your pal.”
He popped his jaw, and tried not to scowl. “Don’t flirt with him, either.”
Her brows lifted so high, they nearly disappeared. “Wow, you must think I’m one complicated chick. You’re actually worried I’ll want to kill and screw him? Who knew I was so bold?” She clucked her tongue. “Or disgusting?”
He rolled his shoulder, refusing to offer an apology. Instead, he stayed on the attack. “You can get angry if you want, Will. But after last night, I’m realizing I don’t know you at all.”
“Don’t be so hard on yourself.” She leaned her head back against the seat and gave a breezy sigh that he knew was meant to piss him off. “I mean, the whole virgin thing is hardly an image I work to project.”
“And what about the birth control pills?” He’d seen her taking one of the little pink pills the past two mornings. “What’s the story with that? I doubt there are many virgins walking around taking the pill.”
“What’s to explain? I have a dangerous job, Noah. One that puts me in close proximity to some really scummy lowlifes. I know how to take care of myself, but things happen. Mistakes, accidents, just stupid bad luck. Sometimes criminals get the upper hand, and I’ve always thought it was best to be prepared for the worst.”
Under his breath, he said, “Hope for the best, prepare for the worst.” At her curious look, he explained. “Just something my mother always said.”
“Smart lady.”
He grunted, thinking about her job, and knowing damn well this wasn’t a train of thought he needed to be following. If he sat there and tortured himself wondering about the dangerous scenarios she’d likely found herself in over the years, he would lose it. It was as simple as that.
Another thought occurred to him, and he asked, “Is your…virginity the reason you never dated Damon?”
“He’s a wild child,” she said evasively, not really answering his question. “I knew there was no way he could keep it tame.”
“Amen to that,” Damon murmured from the backseat, obviously no longer asleep.
Willow glared over her shoulder. “Put your damn earphones in and stop eavesdropping!”
The demon gave a gritty laugh. “Yes, ma’am.”
“So all that crap about your lovers and past boyfriends was just bullshit?” Noah asked.
She turned her face away from him, staring out the window, but he knew she was rolling her eyes. “Virgin doesn’t necessarily mean innocent, Noah.”
Yeah, he knew that. There were all kinds of things a man and woman could do without actual penetration. Hell, he and Will had done some of them last night. But he didn’t think she’d done them with many men. She’d seemed… He didn’t know how to explain it. Not surprised by the things they were doing, but unaccustomed to the pleasure that came from doing them.
But why? God, he couldn’t wrap his mind around it. She was the earthiest, sexiest, most responsive woman he’d ever known. What had she been waiting for?
He tried to remember if she’d said anything over the past two days that might give him a clue to her reason, but his brain was too bogged down to figure it out.
A few minutes later, Noah pulled into the parking lot of the little mom-and-pop café where he was supposed to meet Ashe. He cut the engine, but made no move to get out.
Willow looked at him through her curls again. “You waiting for an invitation?”
He let out a sharp sigh, and said, “No matter what happens, you are not to say anything to Ashe.”
“ABOUT WHAT?” Willow asked, refusing to make it easy for him.
“I could make a really good guess,” Damon offered with a husky laugh.
“I don’t want to hear it,” she muttered, shooting the demon another warning look over her shoulder. He shot her a sexy smile and winked, so she ignored the idiot and turned back to Noah. “If you’re talking about my virginity, it’s not something you can keep a secret, Noah. They’ll need to know. That search in South America might not turn up anything. And it’s really just a waste of their time. I mean, I’m not thrilled about the situation, but I’m already here.”
He took the keys out of the ignition and said, “It won’t be a waste, because they need to find someone else. You don’t fit the requirements.” She could practically hear his teeth crunching. “They need someone trained to handle a situation like this.”
“You think I can’t handle it?”
He slid her a shadowed look from the corner of his eye. “This isn’t a game, Willow. These are real monsters who will take you down the first chance they get. Whatever Damon has told you is going to happen during this ceremony, I can assure it’s going to get violent and it’s going to get ugly. I don’t want you anywhere near it.”
Pride had her lifting her chin. “I know how to deal with things that are violent and ugly. And my profession isn’t a game.”
“Isn’t it?” he rasped, and she wondered if he was trying to piss her off on purpose. Was he trying to make her so angry that she left? Hah! As if it was possible. Didn’t the guy know she could give lessons in stubborn?
“I help people, Noah.”
He snorted like a complete asshole. “You just like beating up on men, Will. Who knows why? Maybe it has something to do with sexual frustration.”
Pain lanced through her like the cutting edge of a knife, and she had to fight the urge to strike out at him. Taking a shaky breath, she said, “You son of a bitch. You are just trying to piss me off.”
“No trying about it,” Damon drawled from the backseat. “He is definitely pissing you off. The question is why are you letting him get to you? What do you care what he says or thinks? He’s not your daddy.”
“You’re right, Damon. He’s not. Which means I don’t have to listen.”
“But you’re going to,” Noah growled, putting one arm over the back of his seat as he turned to face her.
“Oh, yeah?” She gave him a mean smile. “Make me,” she said, glaring at him.
He returned her hostile look, the silence getting thick and heavy, a muscle pulsing in the side of his hard jaw. Finally, Noah scrubbed a hand over his mouth and said, “I don’t want you to mention anything to Ashe about Calder’s bite, either.”
Willow couldn’t hide her surprise. “They don’t know you were bitten?”
“Yeah, they know about the bite. They were there when it happened. But they don’t know about the…other stuff.”
“You haven’t told them about the changes? Why haven’t you confided in them?”
He practically forced his response through gritted teeth. “Because it’s not exactly something I want people to know.”
She could see the things he wasn’t saying. That he was afraid of how they would react. Worried they would judge him or lose their trust in him. It broke her heart that he felt that fear, but she knew he didn’t want her pity.
“Fine,” she said. “I won’t say anything about the bite.”
“And the other?”
She knew he was talking about her virginity and the ceremony. “We’ll talk about it later.”
He clearly didn’t like her response, but he didn’t press the issue, which was good, since she was still pissed at him for what he’d said. He climbed out of the truck, and started to close the door, then stopped himself and leaned back in, pinning her in place with a dark, glittering stare. “You keep pushing me like this, Will, and I’m going to end up taking this goddamn issue into my own hands,” he muttered, before slamming the door shut.
Willow took a few moments to enjoy the view as Noah walked across the parking lot, since the man’s ass was too perfect to ignore. Then she unleashed on Damon, warning him to cool it with the asinine comments or she was going to contact his ex and tell the woman exactly where she could find his irritating ass.
Damon winced when she delivered the threat. “Damn. You’re a cruel woman, Low.”
“I’m not cruel,” she snapped. “What I am is tired of dealing with you two idiots!”
“Aw, well, you know I’m a jackass. And you should cut Winston a little slack,” he said in an easy drawl, propping his arms on the front seat. “Poor man’s head is spinning. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a guy so twisted up about a woman before. That man wants you, Low. A lot.”
“Shut up, Damon.”
“I’m serious.”
“It doesn’t mean anything,” she argued, picking up the soda Noah had bought her when they’d stopped for gas. “Noah’s just one of those guys who always wants what he can’t have.”
“Bullshit. Winston isn’t just screwing with your mind. He’s acting like a guy who’s found that one thing he wants more than any other. He’s just too scared to do anything about it, because he knows damn well where it’ll lead.”
Setting the soda down again, she asked, “Why are you pushing this, Damon? Are you trying to drive me out of my mind? I mean, you’re the one who said there was a reason for my forced virginity!”
“And I still believe there is,” he said gently, reaching out and tucking a wayward curl behind her ear. “But you won’t have to stay a virgin forever, Will.”
Baffled, she said, “How do you know that?”
A low laugh slid lazily from his lips. “I just know, honey.”
There was something he wasn’t telling her but she didn’t know what it was, and she was too tired to figure it out. Damon knew about the prophecy that had kept her single for so many years. Because of that prophecy, she’d never trusted a man enough to have sex with him. Not even Damon, and the guy had definitely tried before their relationship had settled into that of close friends. But she knew that if it wasn’t for the current mess they were in, she’d have been tempted to take that risk for Noah.
She just… She didn’t think she could ever risk anything more. Already, she was feeling too hungry for him. Too achy. Desperate. Those breathtaking, pulse-pounding minutes she’d spent with him in that hotel room had been more than she’d bargained for. She’d had no idea just how emotionally destructive it would be. The intimacy, the closeness. They might not have officially done the deed, but he’d broken through her defenses, breaching those parts of her that had always longed for things from this man. Things that weren’t meant to be hers.
There was too much risk, because she would never be able to keep things casual with Noah.
It wasn’t her maidenly virtue that needed protecting. It was her heart.
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