“Have you ever thought of asking him?”
“Have you gone completely insane? I can’t ask him that.”
“Why not? It’s probably the only way you’ll ever find out, unless, of course, he tells you first,” Richard answered.
“No! I can’t. What if he isn’t gay? What if after I tell him, it ruins our friendship? What if he can’t stand me after I tell him? What if he wants to leave me? I can’t lose him, Richard. I just want him to be with me.”
“But what if he is gay? What about the happiness that you’ll miss if you don’t take that chance?”
“Richard, I can’t do that. I just can’t. I’m so scared right now.”
Richard walked over to Cory and wrapped his arms around him as Cory buried his eyes into Richard’s shirt, again. Richard could feel the wetness of Cory’s tears spread through the cloth to his skin.
Richard softly spoke, “Cory, you’ll know when the time is right. At some point you’ll know what Kevin will say to you even before you ask.”
“I only wish I could be as sure as you are.” Cory softly replied.
Richard could feel the fear in Cory right then and wished he could give him some confidence. He tried to remember the uncertainty, the lack of self-assurance, the ever present constant fear inside of a teenager just trying to grow up. He had been 15 once, but the reality of what he had felt back then had faded over the years. But he also knew that Cory had something inside of himself, something that would make this all work out, that Cory would work out himself.
Richard had an idea just then.
“Look Cory. You’re going to be 16 next weekend. Why don’t we invite your friends over and have a birthday party for you?”
“A birthday party? I haven’t had one since I turned 12.”
“Well it’s about time then. It’ll be fun. Tell everyone it’ll also be a pool party. You can barbeque burgers or dogs and just enjoy some time with your friends.”
“Yeah!” Cory was excited now. He started pacing, no, prancing, around the kitchen floor, around and around the cooking island deep in thought.
“Hey, we can play all kinds of games, and swim, and...” He said with his arms going in circles, continuing his pacing.
Richard had to stifle a laugh. “A birthday party will be just the thing for you for your 16th. And being it’s your 16th birthday, we’ll call it your coming out party.”
Cory stopped dead.
“No way! No frigging way! I am NOT coming out,” he almost screamed at Richard.
“Calm down, Cory, that’s not what I meant. A 16th birthday is like a debutante party. It’s the traditional party when someone reaches adulthood. Of course that tradition started hundreds of years ago when being 16 was practically an adult. Today the law says you have to be 18. I didn’t mean that you have to ‘come out’ like you’re thinking.”
“Good, cuz I’m NOT coming out like that yet, maybe never!”
“You’ll know when the time is right, Cory,” Richard said as he walked to Cory and gave him a hug.
That Kevin was never going to know walked all over Cory’s synapses.
The next week at school started off slowly for Cory as he went through the days. He seemed to really enjoy his schoolwork, but as the weekend birthday party approached, his excitement grew. Having his friends, especially Kevin, at his house for the party was going to make his life just ‘perfect.’ Life was good.
Cory had invited Matt, and of course Kevin, along with Kelly, her friend Dawn and Dawn’s boyfriend, Josh. He didn’t know much about Dawn or Josh, but he had spoken to them a few times at school when they were with Kelly. It was going to be a small party, as Cory had only been in that school a short time, and these were his friends, so far.
Cory had stopped riding his bicycle to school, preferring to walk home with Kevin and sometimes with Matt too. As he approached the front of the school after classes on Friday, he spotted Kevin waiting for him. His heart skipped a beat, as was usually the case when he looked at Kevin after not seeing him for 30 seconds or more.
“God, he is so hot,” Cory said to himself as goose bumps ravaged his body again.
“Hey, dude, ready for our party tomorrow?” Kevin asked as Cory approached him, banging his knuckles with him in that familiar greeting of teenagers.
“Not yet. I still have to clean up the back yard today and get the pool cleaned and stuff.
“Need some help? I could sure use a dip in the pool when we’re done,” Kevin grinned, eyebrows lifting rapidly.
“Geez, Kev, you are such an exhibitionist. You just want to pretend you’re this swimming team super jock. Cory frowned. “And what do you mean ‘our’ party? This is MY party. You don’t turn 16 for another month.”
“Don’t best friends share? I want to share this with you.” Kevin paused for a moment, looking away from Cory.
Kevin turned back to Cory.
“Okay, okay. I know I’m much too young for you, so let’s just say that it’ll be preparation for ‘my’ 16th coming out party, okay?”
Fear and anticipation ran through Cory. Was Kevin saying that he’s gay and will be coming out? No way. Kevin’s just trying to get Cory with that debutante shit, but Cory could play his game too.
“So you’re going to wait until you’re 16 before you come out, huh perv?”
Kevin shot a look at Cory, and Cory saw fear in his eyes for an instant, but then that fear quickly evolved into the look of the devil.
“Only to you, my dear,” Kevin whispered, eyebrows bouncing.
Cory stared at Kevin, praying that what he said was true, but realized that Kevin was being just Kevin. He smacked his arm.
“What a perv, man. You’re so full of shit you scare me sometimes.”
Cory was in no way ready to go into what might have happened if Kevin kept up that little joke of his.
“Get your pervy ass in gear and let’s go clean the pool,” Cory told Kevin.
As they walked toward Cory’s house, they talked mostly about school, homework, the possibility of Cory, Kevin and Matt being on the swim team together when there were enough openings, the party the next day, you know, nothing earth shaking.
The back yard didn’t look that bad though, only a few leaves on the grass and a few pieces of paper that had blown in on the wind and had stuck to the back fence. The pool however needed vacuuming and fresh chemicals tossed in. Cory assigned Kevin the task of picking up around the back yard, while he got the hose and vacuum head out of the pool house. The pool house to the right of the pool had a changing room, towel storage area and a shower to clean off the chlorine after swimming the pool.
Cory let the self-moving vacuum head reach the bottom of the pool and turned on the suction. Satisfied that it was moving across the pool bottom, he turned his attention to the deck furniture. Everything looked fine except for a layer of dust on the tables and chairs.
Cory looked around for Kevin, and saw him in the back corner of the yard, staring at him!
What the hell? Why’s he looking at me like that? God he can be so lazy but damned cute, he thought.
“Hey slacker! You done with the yard yet?” Cory shouted.
Kevin seemed to be shaken out of his daze.
“Yup. What do you want me to do next?”
“Why don’t you go into the kitchen and get that rag from the counter. Wet it down and can you wipe off the table and chairs? I’m going to fire up the grill and get it cleaned.
Kevin bounded back to the deck, but slowed as he passed Cory, who was still standing poolside.
“Pool looks miiiiiighty inviting,” Kevin said as he passed, eyebrows wiggling in that up and down mode again.
“Get your work done first, Groucho, then we’ll think about the pool.”
Cory tried to swat Kevin’s arm again, but Kevin had too quickly ducked inside the sliding glass doors before Cory could get to him. Cory again melted as he smiled in Kevin’s direction, although he couldn’t see him at that moment. Cory wishe
d that he could just tell Kevin about himself. Why does he have to be so straight? Why does this have to be so difficult? Cory questioned his life.
Kevin returned and started wiping the patio furniture. He returned to the kitchen several times to clean the towel he was using, as Cory waited for the grill to heat up so he could use the wire brush on it.
It was now Cory’s time to watch Kevin while he waited. As he watched him, he had to admit that Kevin was gorgeous as he noticed how his brown hair was trimmed and combed forward with the front bangs gelled up into a short wall above his forehead. Those blond highlights were so striking, he thought. They brought out the soft blue-green of his eyes like pools of water. Cory wanted to drink of that blue water, to quench him, to....
“Hey! Stop drooling,” Cory heard Kevin yell.
“Huh? Oh, sorry. I guess I was day dreaming,” hoping Kevin wasn’t thinking about what Cory was thinking.
“Well I’m just about done here. Scrape the grill and let’s get wet.” Kevin had that grin back on.
“Okay. Okay. It’ll only take a minute.” Cory quickly scrapped the grill as Kevin returned the towel to the kitchen.
As Kevin popped his head through the sliding glass door, he shouted, “Ready?”
“Yup.” As Cory returned the wire brush to the shelf under the grill, he yelled back, “Okay, let’s go get changed. The new chemicals in the pool have been in long enough now for it to be okay.”
Cory entered his bedroom in front of Kevin and went directly to his dresser. Rummaging through a drawer, he pulled out his pair of board shorts and turned around. Kevin was just standing in the middle of the room, staring at Cory.
“What?” Cory asked.
“I don’t have any trunks.”
“Well, all I have is one pair of boarders.”
“Where are your racing trunks?”
“That’s an old pair, kind a ratty. They hardly even fit me anymore. I’m growing, you know?”
“Yeah, I noticed,” Kevin returned.
Cory shot Kevin another one of those looks. He couldn’t understand why all the double meanings were coming from Kevin. Was he reading far too much into what Kevin had been saying? Or, did Kevin really mean what Cory thought he meant? Cory thought he was losing it. He figured that he was just hearing what he wanted to hear.
“Okay, if you want to wear them that’s up to you. But you’ve been warned. At least we’ll be alone this afternoon so you won’t have to feel embarrassed, cuz it’s only me here with you.”
Kevin’s smile lengthened as he took the old Speedos from Cory.
“Well, you know Cory, since it’s just the two of us, we can just skinny dip, you know?”
What is with Kevin? There’s nothing more than that that Cory wanted to do right then, but what in the hell was Kevin saying? What had gotten into him? Did he really want to go naked with Cory in the pool? Maybe it’s because the boys had been in the shower together so many times after gym class that Kevin didn’t feel shy around Cory any more. ‘That’s it!’ Cory thought. ‘It’s got to be. Kevin’s just being natural. There’s nothing more to it, right? Kevin didn’t have any gay feelings toward Cory at all,’ he thought.
“Nah, it’s too light out, so just put on the speedos and let’s jump in and cool off.”
Cory knew that he sure needed to cool off just then.
Cory reached behind his head, grabbed the neck of his tee, pulled it over his head and threw it on the bed next to Kevin. Kevin hadn’t moved yet. Cory pulled off his shoes and socks, turned around and started to pull down his shorts, but stopped, still bent over and looked under his arm at Kevin.
“Come on, dip shit. Get changed,” he said to Kevin.
With that, Cory, with his back to Kevin, stripped off his shorts and boxers and stepped into his board shorts and pulled them up. Once finished, he turned around to see Kevin sitting on his bed with just his trainers and socks off, still looking at him.
“Earth to Kevin,” he said.
Kevin shook his body quickly.
“Oh, yeah, give me a sec,” as he quickly stripped and pulled on the older speedos...RIGHT IN FRONT OF CORY!
Now it was Cory’s time to watch Kevin. He watched Kevin thinking that he had the nicest ass. Why didn’t Cory see it like that in gym? Cory guessed it was because he was always looking at the wall instead of around the shower room. Or, maybe it was because Cory was alone with him right now and no one can catch him watching him. Shit...except KEVIN HIMSELF.
Cory quickly turned from Kevin and ran from the bedroom.
“Meet you at the pool, Kev.”
Once outside, Cory knew that he had been getting hard from watching Kevin get undressed. Cory knew there was only one thing to do. He dove into the water. As he surfaced, sweeping his head to the side to get his bangs out of his eyes, he saw a huge body in front of his eyes. ‘Oh shit.’ he thought as Kevin bombed into the water just beside him, causing his bangs to once again droop over his eyes.
As Kevin surfaced, Cory splashed him with a wave of water from the skidding heel of his hand.
“Dip shit. Take it like a man,” Cory shouted as he continued to splash water onto Kevin’s face. Kevin returned with his splashing onto Cory’s face. They continued until Kevin finally petered out.
“Okay, okay. Enough, man. You’re going to drown me and you’ll never see me again.”
That stopped Cory flat.
The two boys horsed over to the side of the pool and Kevin finally pulled himself out of the water at the shallow end.
“That’s enough for me,” Kevin said. “I’ve cooled down from having to slave under my task master,” he laughed out to Cory.
Cory couldn’t help but see his old speedos Kevin was wearing, and they were wet. Cory noticed that the older speedos really hugged him, and, and, Oh my God! Kevin looked HUGE in them.
“Hey, Cory, I better get home. It’s getting late and Mom wants me home for dinner soon.”
Cory also jumped out of the pool. “Okay, but don’t forget. The party starts at 5:00 tomorrow afternoon. You can come early and help me set up, if you’d like.”
“Okay. Sounds like a plan. I’ll see you about 4:00, okay?”
Cory smiled again. “See you then. Oh, and don’t forget your trunks, doofus.”
“Now why would I want to forget those?”
“Perv!” Cory yelled.
Kevin winked and strolled back into the house.
Cory slept in until almost 10:00 the next morning. When he couldn’t stand the sun brightening his room any more, he got out of bed, completed his morning routine in the bathroom, and went downstairs to the kitchen in only a clean pair of boxers.
Richard eyed Cory as Cory grabbed a bowl for some morning oats and nuts.
“Why only the boxers?” he asked.
“Huh? Oh. Shit. Sorry. I guess I’m not awake yet.”
“Don’t swear,” Richard chided the boy who was only half awake.
“I’ll put something on. Be right back.”
“That’s okay. I guess since it’s your birthday today, you can go around in your birthday suit if you’d like.”
“Oh shit, I almost forgot it’s my birthday.”
“Don’t swear,” Richard chided again.
Cory became excited again, remembering it was his 16th birthday. ‘I’m almost a man,’ he thought. Ri
“Richard? Now that I’m 16...” Cory slowly let out, “...what are the chances of me getting a car?”
“A car?”
That request shocked Richard. He knew it was coming, but when it did, he still wasn’t ready for it. He also knew that he was stalling.
“Um,” Richard began. “Well, not until you’ve passed Driver’s Ed at least and then not until you’ve passed your learner’s permit exam and then maybe not until you’ve passed your driver’s test. And then again maybe not until I retire.” Richard couldn’t hold it in any longer. He had to laugh.
It was approaching the end of October, and the weather
in Southeastern Michigan could be unpredictable. It was still warm, so a pool party was still possible although it probably was going to be the last time until next spring.
Kevin’s mom dropped Kevin off and he showed up at the door at 3:30 that afternoon. Cory hadn’t expected him until 4:00, so when he stood standing at the door, Cory was surprised. Actually, he wasn’t too surprised as Kevin could be unpredictable. No, Kevin could be just Kevin and all that that means.
“You’re late!” Cory sprang on Kevin trying to addle him.
“I’m not late! I’m early!”
“Okay, you’re early. So what are you doing here so early then?”
“Um, nothing better to do, I guess,” Kevin grinned at him through the doorway.
Cory knew that Kevin was here early because he was just as excited about the upcoming party as he was, and maybe, just maybe, Kevin just wanted to be with Cory.
Kevin looked at Cory. Then his eyes dropped lower and widened.
“Um, Cory, what are you still doing in your underwear? It’s the middle of the afternoon.”
“Hey! It’s MY birthday. Richard said that I could wear my birthday suit if I wanted to. But, this is as far as he’d let me go, not the real thing.”
“Humph. Don’t you ever call me a perv again, you perv.”
They laughed together. Cory felt so good just to be with Kevin. They just seemed to click so much together. Again Cory had to ask himself what he was thinking, even considering, that this would be going anywhere further.
They spent the next hour getting out paper plates, plastic cups, napkins, chips, dips and all the other trappings of a party to set up around the house and the deck, then Cory ran upstairs and got dressed.
Matt was the first to arrive, and of course he was right on time. Kelly and her friends didn’t show up until almost 5:30. When the chimes rang for the late arrivals, Cory had to yell as he ripped open the door, “You’re late you know?”
“Hey. I have to be fashionably late. Gotta attract that future boyfriend with my sophistication, you know?” Kelly laughed as she strode through the doorway. “But I can see that there’s not much hope here,” she chided Cory.
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