Jesse has since traveled to Rikers Island to speak to the incarcerated about his life and poor decision-making. He has voiced his opinion that redemption doesn’t start once you are released but the minute you are locked up. He has held poetry workshops with formerly incarcerated youth and desires to one day teach in juvenile hall with no cameras, no publicity, and certainly no Justin Timberlake, who played him in the movie Alpha Dog.
* * *
Jeff Markowitz has his own opinion on second chances. “Rugge never should have gotten out. He should have been convicted of murder. This is what we believe. He put tape over my son’s mouth and face. And taped his hands behind his back.” If Rugge was doing fine in prison but was permanently incarcerated, Jeff Markowitz would have no issue with that.
Jeff discloses what it was like at Rugge’s parole hearing, remembering how Nick and Rugge once wrestled under the Christmas tree. “Even though Rugge was responsible for Nick’s death, you have compassion for him. But you fight that away because we know the truth. Looking at him, it still didn’t fix what he had done. He wasn’t convicted of what he should have been convicted of.”
Susan Markowitz adds, “I felt for his parents, but that doesn’t undo ‘dead.’ ” She believes second chances should be granted if you haven’t taken a life.
Jeff states, “Unless you’re in our shoes, it’s difficult to understand.”
When discussing the morning that Nick left home without telling anyone, Jeff reflects how the “last time we saw Nick he didn’t trust us enough to show us what he had [Valium in his pocket]. That was very devastating.” The one message he does voice: “You gotta know when to fight for your life and get the hell out. Look at certain gangster movies—they put you in a calming situation before they take you out. Nick’s a perfect example of that.” Susan adds that Nick was lulled into a “false sense of security. Even up until the last minute.”
As far as second chances and their son, Ben Markowitz, Jeff states, “Ben has become a wonderful father and husband. There’s always that possibility [for redemption].”
Susan reflects, “Ben has learned from his past.” She believes it no longer personifies him. He’s reset his trajectory in terms of attitude, beliefs, and values, thanks to being a father of four. “I’m feeling the love for Ben as I did my own son. And I’ve never voiced that before. And that is the truth.”
* * *
Kirk Miyashiro also had thoughts on William Skidmore and Jesse Rugge, both of whom have been released. “I’ll put it as this,” he says with a deep pause. “God has given me multiple second chances. He’s never given up on me. He’s my savior. He’s everything. If I have a God who’s done that for me out of the billions of people in this world, why wouldn’t I extend the same to someone else?
“That’s where I come from. I am not perfect, no one is. We all have made mistakes, yet Christ has died on that cross for that reason. And it’s undeniable to me.
“How I feel about those two men?” His tone softens but never wavers in conviction. “If they truly have repented, and have decided to change their lives to save others, then thumbs-up from me. Absolutely.” What an elder sees sitting, the young can’t see standing.
* * *
As far as Detective Valencia’s feelings about second chances? “There’s essentially a good and evil in this world. You didn’t need to be taught that you didn’t need to kill another human being. One of the struggles in the military is we’re raised our entire lives thinking murder’s wrong, the Bible says it’s wrong, and then you join the military and they’re like, ‘Hey, we want you to go kill that guy.’ And have no repercussions. It’s the same growing up in any family or household. I don’t care what your demographics are. Killing is wrong. The way that poor child died is not cool. I am not selective—we’re law enforcement—and can’t be selective in the laws we choose to enforce.”
In regard to William Skidmore and Jesse Rugge earning their release? “If the state says, ‘Let ’em out,’ let ’em out. I’m not upset about it and don’t have to agree with it. They don’t have to call Mark to find out if it’s okay. I wish them the best, but it doesn’t reverse what happened. It’s murder. If it was your family or friend—it’s hard to forgive.
“This is a life-altering event for all families involved.”
* * *
Carey Evans also reflected on Nick’s life, writing, “Over time, I think that I’ve developed a more nuanced view of the whole thing, and I can even in some ways empathize with how they ended up doing what they did to Nick. We’ve all been in situations where we’ve been too scared to make the right decision, either because doing the right thing is difficult, or we don’t see a way out of making the wrong choice.”
Carey adds, “I have been thinking a lot about my seventeen-year-old self, and it’s amazing how little of myself today I see in him. I imagine that, were my seventeen-year-old self to meet me today, he would feel the same. I imagine this is probably not too far off from what most of the guys responsible for Nick’s death feel. And it would even probably be quite similar to what Nick would feel if he were alive today. But yet we are all quite fundamentally shaped by what our selves of August 2000 did that led us to be where and who we are or (in Nick’s case) aren’t today.”
Carey doesn’t know if he believes in “second chances, per se. But I certainly believe in forgiveness.”
Now a father himself, Carey believes Nick’s greatest impact on him was how he’s come away “with a greater sense of value of life from the whole thing.”
He continues, “As for Nick, who is the real story here, memory has a funny way of shaping perception. The task of getting to the bottom of who he was isn’t easy—because he was someone to each and every one of us, and our memories are shaped by the parts of himself that he let any of us see over the time we knew him. I suppose if you were to triangulate all the input you got from different people about him, he’d be somewhere in the middle of all of it.”
* * *
It is drizzling at Lizard’s Mouth. An overcast has set in that blurs the ocean into an indistinguishable gray.
Two hikers laugh en route and pass just on the other side of Nick’s memorial, never taking notice. As darkness descends, a single lantern illuminates Nick’s carved name. Instead of flowers, there are Susan’s thoughts before it:
He’s in my heart and soul every single moment. When I wake up or go to sleep. It will never ever ever—and I do mean ever—get better in regard to the gut-wrenching pain of just not having him here. And just thinking of whom his bride would be or what his babies would look like. Or what he would look like. It will never go away. And I think people think the pain lessens—it does not. And I’m okay with that because every day that I think about him and have that pain it means that he was so worth loving and losing. What else could you possibly want to live for? It’s a mother’s gift to speak about her son.
Susan wishes to harness ache in a way that leaves enough room for something beautiful to bloom. Nick still lives in her and through her resolve. “Nothing will ever comfort me until I have my son in my arms.” However, she urges, “You have to be compassionate and live life.” And now it’s her son tasking us. “This is what Nick would want.”
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
Nick Markowitz
With sincere thanks:
Susan Markowitz
Eve Porinchak
Fiona Simpson
Detective Mark Valencia
My family
Simon & Schuster
Valerie Shea
InsideOUT Writers/Prison Insight Program
SOURCES
Phone, Written, or In-Person Interviews
Eddy Bachman* (a pseudonym)
Carey Evans
Jesse James Hollywood
Ryan Hoyt
Jeffrey Markowitz
Susan Markowitz
Kirk Miyashiro
Jesse Rugge
William Skidmore
Detective Mark Valencia
>
Nick Markowitz’s Diary
Read by Susan Markowitz
Superior Court of the State of California for the County of Santa Barbara Grand Jury Proceedings No. 1014465
Vols. I–III (Oct 23, 24, 25, 26, 30, 2000), grand jury transcripts.
Vols. I–IV (May 15, June 24, June 30, July 1, 2009) Jesse James Hollywood trial transcripts.
Books
Markowitz, Susan, with Jenna Glatzer. My Stolen Son: The Nick Markowitz Story. New York: Berkley Publishing Group, 2010.
Scott, Robert. Most Wanted Killer. New York: Pinnacle Books, 2010.
Websites
nicholasmarkowitz.com (memorial site)
Video interview in collaboration with Michel DeAscentiis and Stan Okumura at attn.com:
jamesblatt.com
Susan Markowitz Facebook page
Jesse Hollywood Facebook page
Newspaper Articles
Kelley, Daryl, Tina Dirmann, and Sue Fox. “Simi Man and 3 Others Appear in Court in Slaying of Teenager.” Los Angeles Times, August 19, 2000.
Fox, Sue. “The Last Days of Nick Markowitz.” Los Angeles Times, December 10, 2000.
Fox, Sue. “Kidnap Victim Could Have Fled, Witnesses Testify.” Los Angeles Times, November 1, 2001.
Fox, Sue. “Murder Suspect Testifies His Confession Was a Lie.” Los Angeles Times, November 9, 2001.
Guccione, Jean. “Killer Gets Death Penalty.” Los Angeles Times, February 8, 2003.
Chu, Henry and Solomon Moore. “Fugitive Kept Low Profile in Quiet Brazilian Beach Town.” Los Angeles Times, March 11, 2005.
Pacheco, Angel. “Witness Recounts Frightening Stay By Jesse James Hollywood.” Santa Barbara News Press, May 27, 2009.
Meagher, Chris. “Jury Finds Hollywood Guilty of Murder and Kidnapping.” Santa Barbara Independent, July 8, 2009.
Silverstein, Amy. “Jesse James Hollywood Sentenced to Life.” Santa Barbara Independent, July 15, 2009.
Welsh, Nick. “Jesse Rugge, Markowitz Kidnapper, Released.” Santa Barbara Independent, October 24, 2013.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Johnny Kovatch founded the InsideOUT Writers/Prison Insight Program in seven state prisons throughout California. He also teaches expressive writing to minors being tried as adults in juvenile hall. Originally from Ohio, he currently resides in Los Angeles.
Simon Pulse
Simon & Schuster, New York
Visit us at simonandschuster.com/teen
Authors.SimonandSchuster.com/Johnny-Kovatch
Simon True: Real Stories. Real Teens. Real Consequences.
Also in the series:
Deep Water by Katherine Nichols
One Cut by Eve Porinchak
Coming soon:
The Acid King by Jesse P. Pollack
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SIMON PULSE
An imprint of Simon & Schuster Children’s Publishing Division
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First Simon Pulse edition March 2018
Text copyright © 2018 by Johnny Kovatch
Cover photograph of shovel copyright © 2018 by Vadym Zaitsev/Shutterstock
Images of spray paint copyright © 2018 by johnjohnson13/Thinkstock
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Cover designed by Sarah Creech
Interior designed by Greg Stadnyk
Cover photograph of shovel copyright © 2018 by Vadym Zaitsev/Shutterstock
Cover images of spray paint copyright © 2018 by johnjohnson13/Thinkstock
The text of this book was set in Chaparral Pro.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Names: Kovatch, Johnny, author.
Title: 59 hours / by Johnny Kovatch.
Other titles: Fifty-nine hours
Description: New York : Simon Pulse, [2018] | Series: Simon true : Real stories. Real teens. Real consequences. | Audience: Age: 14+ | Includes bibliographical references.
Identifiers: LCCN 2017005186 (print) | LCCN 2017037000 (eBook) | ISBN 9781481476607 (hc) | ISBN 9781481476591 (pbk) | ISBN 9781481476614 (eBook)
Subjects: LCSH: Hollywood, Jesse James—Juvenile literature. | Markowitz, Nick, 1984-2000—Juvenile literature. | Murder—California—Santa Barbara—Juvenile literature. | Drug dealers—California—Los Angeles—Juvenile literature.
Classification: LCC HV6534.S33 (eBook) | LCC HV6534.S33 K68 2018 (print) | DDC 364.152/3092—dc23
LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2017005186
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