by Eva Chase
She grasped my hand as she said those last words as if to emphasize her point. My heart squeezed in a way I wasn’t totally comfortable with yet but still welcomed. I believed her. It was only my stupid insecurities about who I was and what I was supposed to be that provoked any doubts.
“I got an apartment in Manhattan,” I said abruptly, without knowing I was going to mention it before the words spilled out. “I didn’t want to have to go back to the Killbrook residence when school’s on break. Maybe this weekend, I could have you over to see it?”
A much more definite smile crossed Rory’s face then. “I’d love to. And that sounds like a really good step for you to take. How did your father react?”
“I didn’t talk to him about it. He hasn’t gotten in touch. As far as I know, he’s just glad to have me out of his hair.”
I didn’t really think I could count on my separation from the family being that simple, but there was no point in worrying Rory about things that hadn’t happened yet.
“I’m taking precautions to make sure the apartment is secure,” I added, in case she would anyway.
“Good. I’m looking forward to seeing the place. I’m sure it’ll be a nice change from gloomy stone mansions.” She laughed a little and stood up—time for her to go.
I tugged her to me for one more kiss, channeling my rush of happiness into the gesture. Then I dipped my head by her ear. “I love you,” I said—softly, but it got easier each time I formed the words.
Rory gave me another quick kiss, her eyes shining as she gazed back at me. “I love you too.”
And then she was loping across the parking lot toward the garage, where she was going to drive off to see another guy she might also be falling in love with. I just had to not be jealous about that.
In some ways, my disadvantage was also my advantage, I reminded myself. I was the only one of the scions who could make a permanent commitment to her without losing my position, because it wasn’t actually my position to begin with. A mixed blessing.
I’d meant to go back to my dorm room to finish up my paper for World Economics, but as I circumnavigated the hall that bore my family’s name, a flicker of movement at the corner of my eye caught my attention.
I paused on the edge of the green and took a slow scan around with as casual an air as I could put on, as if I were lost in thought and my gaze simply meandering. At the same time, I spoke a quick word under my breath. A wisp of the magic gathered at the base of my throat tingled up to my eyes.
There. Standing by the corner of Killbrook Hall, a figure blinked into view when I kept my eyes aimed just a little away from it. A man, middle-aged as far as I could tell without looking at him directly, wearing nondescript clothes that could easily have blended in with the maintenance staff. Except for some reason he had an illusion cast over him to help him also blend into the stone wall behind him. That didn’t bode well.
I waited for a minute to see if he’d follow Rory to the garage, but he didn’t show any sign of even looking in her direction. No, he appeared to be watching me. An uneasy prickling ran over my skin.
It was an easy enough theory to test. I set off across the green, toward the lake rather than the residences to put more distance between us. Halfway along the path, I veered off to the side toward the kennel where Malcolm’s familiar lived. Connar had planned on giving the wolf a run and a chance to hunt yesterday after we’d determined that Malcolm was missing, but the animal was probably getting stir-crazy again. I could probably get away with letting it out for a bit even though class time had technically started.
And this gave me the opportunity to judge whether I was being followed.
In the middle of the field, I stopped as if I’d seen something in the grass and bent down. As I reached for the ground, I glanced around surreptitiously, murmuring my casting word to deflect illusions again.
The guy had followed me. He was more visible now that he’d had to move away from his original post—it was always harder to keep up camouflaging illusions when in motion. He’d come around Ashgrave Hall and stopped there near the building, his face still turned in my direction.
Well, my instincts had been set off by more than paranoia, clearly. This jackass was tailing me. I didn’t know why, but I could make a solid guess.
I’d just removed myself from my supposed father’s domain and aligned myself in every possible way with the soon-to-be baron he saw as a threat. Now he was having people keep an eye on me to see what I’d do next.
Or to make sure I couldn’t do anything at all.
My mouth went dry. I debated the merits of marching right up to the guy and telling him off, but that’d just mean the next people my father sent would take even more care to disguise their surveillance. And maybe it’d make Dad think I needed a firmer hand than he’d taken in this situation so far.
No, for now it was better to lay low and stay sharp. While his people observed me, I could observe them right back—and make sure I didn’t give away anything he could use against me or the other scions.
Chapter Four
Rory
It was so very Declan that while the other scions owned flashy, posh-looking cars—even I had a Lexus, courtesy of my inheritance—he drove a modest sedan, the kind no one would have looked twice at on the road or in a parking lot. It was also very him that the inside was perfectly neat, not a bit of litter on the floor or the dashboard.
He set a travel mug of coffee in the cup holder as I sank into the leather seat on the passenger side, which honestly, was just as comfortable as any fancier car I’d ever been in. The cedar scent I associated with him washed over me. I tipped my head back with a slow exhale. He hadn’t even started the engine, and the thought of what we might find at the Nightwood mansion was already making me tense.
“I guess we don’t have to worry so much about being seen hanging out together now, huh?” I said. “Now that you’re not a TA anymore?”
Declan ran his hand over his hair, smoothing the black strands he kept swept back from his forehead, before turning the key. The rumble of the engine hummed through the seats. “No one can accuse me of anything other than spending time with a colleague and friend,” he said. “And that should hardly raise any eyebrows.”
“Has there still been no sign of my grandparents?” My birth father’s parents had come sniffing around trying to benefit from my return to the fearmancer world not that long ago—and they’d caught Declan and me in what we’d thought was a private moment. They hadn’t seen clear proof that we were romantically involved, but it’d been enough for them to try to blackmail him and hassle me about it… until I’d given him the go-ahead to dig up a past crime of theirs for the blacksuits to pursue.
“They’re still hiding out wherever they fled to in Europe,” he said. “I don’t think the blacksuits are trying all that hard to find them. Out of sight, out of mind. Even if they do come back and make a fuss, they don’t have any evidence, and nothing we do from here on breaks any rules.”
That was certainly a relief, but something about the way he’d talked about it niggled at me. I tried to put that discomfort into words as he drove the car out of the university garage and turned onto the road that led through town. Before I could, he changed the subject.
“Have you come up with a strategy for getting to Malcolm’s room?”
Thinking about that concrete plan steadied me. “You said it’s on the second floor around the side,” I said. “So whoever you’re talking to at the front door won’t be able to keep an eye on it from the outside. I figured I’d use a similar trick to when I dropped in on your dorm room.”
A couple months ago when I’d needed to speak to Declan in secret, I’d cast an illusion over the wall beneath my bedroom window and climbed down a rope to Declan’s, which was right under mine. It’d worked well enough.
Declan let out a chuckle. “I guess there’s something to be said for tried and true. You’d be going up instead of down this time, though. How are you
going to fix the rope in place?”
“I’m conjuring it, so I figure I can meld it with the window frame. Assuming the window’s open. I guess if it’s not I can use a spell to handle that too.” I frowned, trying to picture the possibilities. “It seems a lot less likely I’d get caught if I go straight from the outside rather than navigating the entire house, anyway.”
“Fair enough. If he’s in there, I suppose he’ll get an interesting surprise.”
I tapped Declan lightly with my elbow. “Maybe I should pay you a surprise visit again some night now that we don’t have to worry so much.”
When he didn’t immediately respond to my teasing flirtation, my stomach dropped. “I mean, if you’d like that. I don’t know—we never did get to talk—” That was what had bothered me. The uncertainty, the way he’d talked about me as a “colleague and friend” when I couldn’t help seeing him as so much more.
Connar might have been the first of the scions to show me much friendliness, but Declan had never been cruel. He’d just been trying to keep his distance to protect himself and his family. But even with those responsibilities hanging over him and all the pressures he was facing from the barons, who’d wanted him to help them get me in line, he’d done more to look out for me than anyone else at Blood U had. He’d taught me how to shield my mind, he’d helped me understand both the community I belonged to and the one I’d thought I did, he’d investigated his other colleagues, and he’d even gotten me out of the blacksuits’ prison and ensured I had all the time I needed to defend myself.
And the few times he’d given in to the attraction that sizzled between us, he’d shown me a mix of passion and tenderness that lit a flame in my core just remembering it.
I wanted more of that. I’d hoped he did too. He’d hinted that it was at least part of the reason he’d resigned as a teacher’s aide. But he’d had a little more time to think about it now. He’d struggled with the fact that he couldn’t ever make a real commitment to me without giving up the Ashgrave barony and placing all the responsibilities—and danger—that came with it on his younger brother’s shoulders. Maybe he’d decided that having me and then giving me up would be too painful after all.
“Rory,” Declan said, so gently that my most immediate worries faded. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t sure if it was a good time to get into all that with this news about your mother and the concerns about Malcolm and everything. We can talk about it now if you’d like. We do have a couple hours on the road ahead of us.”
“Yeah,” I said, my heart beating a little faster. “I think that would be good. Just so I know where we stand. What’s okay and what’s not. Maybe there aren’t any rules to worry about now, but I still don’t want to put you in an uncomfortable position.”
“I don’t think that’s very likely. I—” He cut himself off for a moment, his gaze fixed on the road ahead, his hands flexing where they gripped the steering wheel. “The thing I realized is that the steps I told myself I was taking to spare myself pain… They didn’t really make sense. I was already in pain staying away from you.”
He glanced over at me, his hazel eyes so intent I couldn’t have looked away if I’d wanted to. “I love you, Rory. I’ve been falling for you since you first stood up to Malcolm and refused to take his shit, and every time we talk, every stand I watch you take, I just fall harder.”
A hot flush spread up my neck and over my cheeks. The emotion in my chest swelled up so fast it clogged my throat. I couldn’t say more than, “Declan…”
He had to draw his gaze back to the road, but he kept talking. “It’s been killing me holding myself back from saying any of that, from showing any of it… Seeing Jude and Connar be there for you in all the ways I’ve wanted to be… What does it matter if we know it can only be temporary? We could have years of temporary before we have to focus on settling down and making our own families. I’d rather enjoy whatever moments we can have together and deal with the pain when it’s time to end it than only have the painful parts.”
“Yeah.” I swallowed hard. “I see it the same way. Declan, I love you too.”
A hint of a flush colored his own face. “That’s a relief. Then I don’t have to feel like a total idiot for confessing it.”
“There wouldn’t have been anything idiotic about saying it even if I wasn’t ready to say it back.” I looked down at my hands. “If anything, I feel like there’s something wrong with me. I can say that to you, and I’ve said it to Jude… and I think I love Connar too.”
“But not Malcolm?” Declan said with a hint of a grin.
I let out an exasperated sound. “I’m still wrapping my head around the idea that I could like Malcolm. But, God, who knows? At this point, I probably shouldn’t make any assumptions.”
“As hard as I know it may be for you to believe, he can be charming when he wants to be. I’ve seen it with my own eyes.”
“But this isn’t how it’s supposed to work, is it? Aren’t people supposed to fall for one person at a time? I feel so greedy wanting all of you.”
He shrugged. “You’re figuring out who you really are, how you fit into this world, what you’re capable of… I don’t think it’s that strange. We all have the choice of how far we go down that path with you and how we handle ourselves and our emotions. You’ve been honest with me the whole time about how you’re feeling and what you’re feeling for the other guys too. That’s all I’d ask of you.”
“You know, I only ever had one boyfriend my entire life before this,” I felt the need to say. “I wasn’t some crazed nymphomaniac back in California.”
Declan shot me an amused glance. “You don’t strike me as all that crazed now, either.”
I felt a little crazed when he looked at me like that, still a little pink from his confession and my returning it, full of fondness and desire. Why did we have to be talking about this while he was driving, when I couldn’t even kiss him?
I waved my hand dismissively. “My point is just, I wasn’t expecting this. So I’m doing my best.”
“And your best is pretty damn good.”
Okay, now I really wanted to kiss him. I settled for giving his shoulder a quick squeeze. I wasn’t going to be responsible for a car accident in a moment of distraction.
Declan took one hand off the wheel just long enough to brush his fingers over mine. “I look forward to a less restricted new normal with you.” He paused. “I do think we should avoid any especially overt public displays of affection and the like. We can be open about being friendly and spending time together, but I’m not sure how the other barons would react to us being romantically involved as well. It’d be easier not to have to deal with that if we don’t have to.”
I couldn’t argue that. “I’m not sure I’d even want to deal with the reactions we’d get on campus if it was obvious I was dating all three of you. And I don’t want to bring any more trouble down on you than you’ve already had to face for helping me. If that lets you toe the line with the pentacle of barons more easily, I’m happy to keep all our private activities… well, private.”
“Then we’re on exactly the same page,” Declan said with a smile so pleased and warm it sent a tingle through me.
We drove on in a comfortable silence for a few minutes before he added, “You know, I’m glad you’re reaching some kind of understanding with Malcolm, however that develops. He was harder on you than he should have been, and some of the tactics he used—he crossed some lines. But he isn’t his father. He’s still got a sense of honor and loyalty, which Baron Nightwood seems to have lost somewhere along the way. I think, with us all working together, that’s the best way we can make sure our pentacle is a better one than theirs.”
“Yeah,” I said. “I’m starting to think ruling next to him might not be such a bad thing.”
If I got to rule at all. I’d thought that in just a couple years, when Declan and I were both full barons, we could start pushing for change already. If my birth mother returned…
&nb
sp; I pushed that thought out of my mind and focused on the road ahead. Lillian might be wrong. My mother might not even be alive. If she was, she might not want to deal with the stress of ruling anymore after all those years imprisoned. There was no way to know yet.
And I had a whole lot of more urgent things to worry about as we sped along the road toward Malcolm’s family home.
Chapter Five
Rory
When Declan pulled the car onto the shoulder of the road, I knew we’d almost reached the Nightwood property. Time to get down to business.
“I’m going to cast two spells,” he reminded me. “One so no one who looks at the car will see you through the window, and one to help disguise you while you’re heading to the house. You’ll still have to be cautious getting out of the car. I’ll have some of the staff distracted inside. You’ll probably want to cast a searching spell on the nearby windows to make sure no one’s watching.”
“Got it,” I said. “And I’ll want to get to the wall and cast my illusion there as quickly as possible to completely hide myself.”
“Right. What I’m going to cast on you is more of a reflective effect to help you blend in with your current surroundings. It should work okay on the lawn where it’s mostly grass, but it’s still possible for someone to pick up on the effect if they’re looking closely or have a lot of experience with illusions.”
I nodded. My pulse was skittering in anticipation. After Jude’s warning this morning, I couldn’t help adding, “What if Baron Nightwood changed his schedule, and he’s there after all?”
Declan gave me a firm look. “I wouldn’t let you walk into a situation like that. I made a call to one of the people he’s meeting with today and was able to confirm they’re still expecting him. And I’ll use insight on the staff to make sure there’s nothing to worry about when I first talk to them. When you see me go inside, you can assume it’s all clear.”