Sister Freaks

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Sister Freaks Page 12

by Rebecca St. James


  Bethany was devastated. “There was a little prayer attic where we were staying, and I spent so many hours up there asking God, ‘Why are You still allowing this?’ I went back and forth between being angry and knowing that I had to trust Him. I prayed, ‘If there is something to learn, show it to me, and I can keep pressing through this.’”

  From Switzerland, Bethany’s mission team went to Morocco. There they worked in schools and missionary programs, teaching English and helping wherever they were needed. It was there, essentially cut off from her family, that Bethany began to see what she had been learning through her conflict.

  “I think God taught me grace and compassion,” she says. “In Morocco, I realized how much I want the girls around me to know that they are loved. Even if no one else shows them that, they will at least know it from me. Morocco is a very patriarchal society, and a lot of the girls I met were ruled by their fathers. I think I helped them because I identified with them. I knew what it was like to grow up feeling as if you didn’t have a dad, or knowing that he was there but you could never connect with him. I could share what I had learned—that God accepts us into His family.”

  Now home, Bethany is on fire for God and excited about the work she feels called to do. She misses her family, who have now cut her off completely, but she knows that she is being obedient to God as she continues to prepare for a career as a missionary. She clings to the words of Ruth, who was also torn between family loyalty and the will of God when she made her promise to Naomi.

  “I think there is hope in any situation,” Bethany says confidently. “I have talked to people whose family situations are similar. [Reconciliation] could take seven years. It could take twenty. But God allows us to walk through hard times so that we can follow Him, and He can be a beacon. And I remind myself that even if my parents are disowning me, I still belong to His family.”

  In love, he predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will—to the praise of his glorious grace.

  (Ephesians 1:4-6)

  WEEK SIX JOURNAL

  • Does your view of God’s goodness change with your circumstances?

  • What kinds of things make you question Him the most?

  • What “why” questions do you wrestle with the most?

  • What would happen if you “died” to the need for answers and let Him fill you with a new kind of trust in His goodness?

  • What Bible verse or passage of Scripture has been most meaningful to you this week? Why?

  week seven

  1

  jennifer mckinnon

  Alone at the Podium

  The graduation audience sat quietly as Jennifer McKinnon turned away from the podium and placed her notes beside her folding chair. As she began to sit down, the audience stood, a cheer erupting from the filled-to-capacity high-school stadium. Jennifer smiled. And she thanked God for the greatest evangelism opportunity of her young life.

  Jennifer had met Jesus when she was five. The leaders in children’s church shared the gospel with Jennifer and her friends. She knew, even then, that she needed Jesus.

  She continued to attend church, but it wasn’t until high school that she started serving Him with all her heart. For three years, she led a weekly Bible study before school, interacting with all kinds of students. She ran cross-country, so she befriended the athletes in her school. She was president of the band, so she made friends with other musicians. Her desire was to share the love of Jesus with anyone in her school, regardless of his or her position or interests.

  “I saw God do great things in the lives of other students,” she says. “I tried to show people that being a Christian isn’t about being a radical for rules but about being a radical for love.”

  Jennifer wasn’t part of the “in” crowd when she entered high school. Still, she spent her time embracing all sorts of students, sharing the love she’d come to know. “I wasn’t a cheerleader or the quarterback’s girlfriend,” she says. “But at the end of my senior year, I was voted Best All Around by my peers. This wasn’t because I was popular or pretty or smart. I pray it was because I took time to love people as Christ loves people.”

  By her senior year, Jennifer felt a keen sense of urgency regarding her classmates. She knew her graduation speech was her last chance to share the gospel with them.

  Only one person knew the content of her valedictory speech before she gave it. Not even her parents knew what she was going to say. She was supposed to rehearse the speech in front of her English teacher for approval, but she knew if she did that, she wouldn’t be allowed to give it. Earlier in the school year, that teacher had quipped, “Jennifer will never amount to anything because she’s too concerned with family and religion.” In class, this teacher berated her for her beliefs and intentionally asked jarring and antagonizing questions.

  It was an unlikely place to find persecution—in Nederland, Texas, a small town near the Louisiana border. But instead of discouraging her, the teacher’s criticism made Jennifer all the more passionate about sharing Christ, particularly when she stood in front of her peers on graduation night.

  The salutatorian rehearsed his speech for the English teacher, a speech full of platitudes such as “Let us give thanks to a higher power, whoever that may be—Allah, Buddha, God.” When Jennifer rehearsed, she gave an alternative speech. She worried she’d be in trouble for doing that, so she submitted the entire manuscript to another teacher who did not hold her in disdain. That teacher approved.

  Jennifer wanted her speech to be different—something that touched people and clearly communicated the gospel. She felt God had given her this final opportunity to share Him, as if her speech were an exclamation point to a life lived for Christ in high school. She claimed the words of Jeremiah as her own: “Then the LORD stretched out His hand and touched my mouth, and the LORD said to me, / ‘Behold, I have put My words in your mouth’” (1:9 NASB).

  She spoke about her grandfather, a sharecropper, who had no education beyond elementary school. She described him as a brilliant craftsman. “Education doesn’t make you a success,” she said. “Having a purpose does.”

  Standing in front of thousands of friends and family and community members, she took a breath. “If I could leave you with a message, it would be this: thank God for the blessings He’s given you, and live your life for Him.”

  She ended her speech by singing “How Could I Ask for More,” a song written by Christian recording artist Cindy Morgan. When she finished the crowd was silent—until the moment she turned to see the town standing, clapping, and hollering its approval.

  It just so happened that she had to pick up her diploma from the teacher who was supposed to approve her speech. Jennifer walked into the classroom and waited.

  “Interesting speech.” The teacher handed her the diploma.

  “Thank you,” Jennifer said. “God gave it to me.” She left the room smiling—knowing that God had given her words to speak, lives to touch.

  Jennifer knew God was calling her into a life of full-time ministry even then. “Most people thought this meant I was going to marry a pastor, but I knew in my heart God was calling me to ministry. It wasn’t about the person I would marry. It was about what God wanted to do with my life.”

  God continued to put words in Jennifer’s mouth, providing many opportunities to speak in college and beyond. He burned in her a deep desire to teach His truth to teenage girls. “This led me to cofound SAGE Girls Ministries while I was in college,” she recounts. Started with a little bit of change kept in a pickle jar, SAGE Ministries now reaches across the United States with the message that it’s never too early to begin serving Jesus Christ. Its mission statement reads: “To equip a new generation with the resources to develop virtuous character through intimate worship and the sharing of personal testimonies and biblical truths in a relevant, God-honoring manner.”

  The heartbeat of SAGE Ministries is to reach, teach, and train yo
ung women to impact their communities and the world. “As a high school student,” Jennifer says, “I realized and witnessed firsthand that God could use me if I was willing. I want other girls to realize this same truth—that ministry doesn’t have to begin when you’re thirty or forty. They are not merely the future of the church—they are also the present church. I want to tell young girls that it’s time to stand up and make a difference today for the kingdom of Christ.”

  Jennifer continues to be passionate about expanding the kingdom of Christ, traveling to Germany and Russia and sharing Him in places where people’s hearts are calloused to the truth. “In both places I have felt His presence very near as I witnessed in His name,” she says.

  But it all started on a lonely platform in front of a silent audience where Jennifer dared to believe God would put His words in her mouth.

  Let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.

  (Matthew 5:16)

  2

  britany miller

  Revival Bible Study

  Britany Miller met Jesus in the Waffle House parking lot when she was four years old. “How does someone get saved?” she asked her parents. They led her through the steps to salvation. Eleven years later, she met Jesus afresh, this time as a Bridegroom who took great delight in her.

  She remembers her encounter with Jesus as if it were a movie playing on the screen of her mind. Nearly a sophomore in high school, she had become self-conscious, longing for everyone’s approval. Because of this, she placed herself in compromising situations and was drifting away from Jesus.

  One day, on a grassy, green hill as a summer evening breeze washed over her, Britany wrote her first love letter to Jesus as the sun tucked itself in for the night. “During that weekend with Jesus, I experienced love and attention that for once looked at my inner beauty, and in the midst of my shamefulness called me beautiful.”

  The next summer, before Britany’s junior year of high school, the Lord spoke to her. He said, “I want you to start a small-group Bible study for girls.”

  She agreed. The first week of August, she started with three girls from her school in attendance. There was nothing like that going on in her school, so she knew she was taking a leap of faith. One month later, the three girls turned into thirty. She called the group Spoken For to show they were committed to their faith. Soon after, another friend decided to start something similar for guys. In January of that school year, the two groups decided to meet jointly once a month, calling that meeting CoEd.

  Sheltered in Britany’s basement, seventy kids came to the first CoEd event. Thirty asked Jesus to be the Lord of their lives. None of the kids who came were churched kids—they were the band members, druggies, and popular students who roamed the halls of Britany’s high school. Fifteen-year-old Britany was surprised to see so many kids from such a broad spectrum come to faith in Jesus Christ.

  Britany, who attends Roswell Church of God in Woodstock, Georgia, credits Mark and Gwenn, her youth leaders, for mentoring her while she leads Spoken For. It was Gwenn who first helped Britany see herself as a bride of Christ, as His princess.

  Though she’s involved in many aspects of school, including being captain of the cheerleading squad, Britany chooses to spend most of her time planning retreats, preparing to speak, praying for friends—all things related to Spoken For. Because of that, “I feel as if I am out on a limb for Him every day,” she says. “What is Christianity if we don’t venture out to a place where we have to have a little faith? Every time I speak, do a retreat, hand out flyers for Spoken For, go on a mission trip, or pray passionately for someone, I am making myself vulnerable.”

  Every Tuesday night, when Spoken For meets, Britany has learned to wait on God for what He wants her to say. “Each week I prepare a message,” she says. “This is all in faith that the girls are going to be there. There have been times I was to speak at a church or retreat and the Lord told me simply ‘Go without a message.’ I had to have faith that when I opened my mouth, He would give me the words to say.”

  More than learning how to trust God for messages, Britany relishes spending time with Jesus. She loves to enter His presence while singing or listening to praise and worship music. “This is the place where He searches me and either heals me or breaks me, depending on what I need.” As a busy student leading a new ministry, she’s needed refreshment from the Lord. “These are the moments that give me the strength to carry on this ministry for the last two years. These are the times He has whispered to me exactly what the girls needed to hear.”

  She likens herself to Esther—available to others in “such a time as this” (Esther 4:14). “The biggest lesson the Lord has taught me is that His people are desperate. His eyes wander the earth, looking for someone to step forth, to not remain silent, to be an Esther for this generation.”

  She still marvels that God chose to save and use her for His purposes at Woodstock High School, located in a suburban community thirty minutes north of Atlanta. “The Lord spared me,” she says. “He gave me beauty for ashes and called me out to go forth and allow Him to use me.”

  More than sixty kids from Britany’s high school have met Jesus Christ because of the ministry she started out of simple obedience. Weekly, girls approach her for prayer and advice. “I’ve had girls admit to drug use, suicide attempts, molestation, sexual promiscuity, pregnancy, alcoholism—you name it. And they have all come to me during a Spoken For meeting and looked for godly counsel. I know nothing, but I do serve a God who knows everything. He has spoken through me to these hurting girls.”

  Britany loves sharing Jesus with the friends she meets through Spoken For. “This has been fairly easy for me, sharing Jesus with these girls. They are hungry and God is willing to give them food. He just needs someone to deliver it for Him. It’s not that He is looking for anybody perfect or incredible, just a willing person. With a simple okay on my part, the Lord overflows my life with more blessing than I can hold, and a plan I can’t even comprehend.”

  Britany is now on the cusp of a new life at Lee University. She has a dream: she wants to start a new ministry to high school and college-age girls while she’s there. In the midst of school, cheerleading, and ministry, Britany realizes that only Jesus matters. “For this ministry to be successful, I have to go beyond people, beyond the physical, and enter into a supernatural place where I see with spiritual eyes and ears. I am not satisfied with a glance or one word from Him.”

  She’s found life in ministry lonely at times. “Of course everyone sees me preaching every Tuesday, but what does God see? What does He require? These are the secret decisions I have to make on my own in order for God’s blessing and favor to be upon us. Everyone wants to be there when things are easy, but when it’s hard, sometimes the Lord requires me to go forth alone.”

  In this place of willingness and even loneliness, Britany has been able to see God do miraculous things, including changing the lives of those around her. “When we allow ourselves to undergo a purification process and then are brave enough to speak the word of the Lord with genuine motives and a passionate heart, nothing is impossible.”

  At eighteen, Britany’s had the privilege of seeing just that. Who knew what could come from a spiritual encounter in a Waffle House parking lot.

  As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. But, just as He who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: “Be holy, because I am holy.”

  (1 Peter 1:14-16)

  3

  shirley

  The Joy of the Lord

  Meeting Shirley is a pleasant experience. Joy shines in her eyes and her beaming smile. She seems to know the secret to living with gratitude. She wears no banners of self-entitlement; she is unassuming and sweet. But behind her pleasant, jovial nature is a woman with strong faith who understands the pain of rejection and loneliness.

  Shirley grew up without her mother
and father. She was three when her mom died, and soon after her dad abandoned the family. Shirley then was sent to live with her aunt and uncle.

  Life on the farm with her cousins and new guardians was not easy. Shirley remembers as a very young girl wanting desperately to fit into the family. She prayed, “God, please help me to be a better little girl so Aunt Edna and Uncle Chester will love me.” Shirley worked hard around the farm but never received praise or a second glance for her hard work. Maybe if I just scrub the floors harder or wash the dishes better, they will learn to like me, she would think.

  Edna and Chester did not treat Shirley the way they treated their own children. They often spanked her when a situation wasn’t her fault. Her cousins never had to do any work, but Shirley worked from sunrise to bedtime each day. She had to wash her face and brush her teeth outside in the bitter cold. At such a young age, Shirley knew only a life of labor. The day was full of washing, cooking, and cleaning for the whole family and the hired hands, day in and day out. The workload never decreased, no matter how much faster she worked.

  Once she asked, “Aunt Edna, can I go shopping with you today?”

  “You can’t go. You are too ugly,” answered her aunt.

  Despite Shirley’s early experience with rejection, she knew the Lord loved her. Her favorite day of the week was Sunday. Her aunt and uncle did allow her to go to church with them, and how she loved it. There, Shirley learned songs and hymns of praise that sustained her through long days of drudgery: “I sing because I’m happy / I sing because I’m free / For His eye is on the sparrow, / And I know He watches me.”

  Singing became a healing balm for her soul. The barn became her sanctuary, where she sang to the cows and the pigs while she went about her chores. She knew God cared for the animals and for her. Though the days were long and she was always tired, she had strength to sing praises to the Lord, offering up her calloused hands and lonely heart to Him.

 

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