by Lucy Lennox
“You seem like you could use a hug,” he said with a shrug. There was a faint tinge of pink on his cheeks, and I was reminded about how shy and sweet the young man was.
“More likely he could use a good fuck,” Mike suggested. “Want me to take you out tonight? I was going to grab a drink with a friend, but he’d probably love dragging me to Harry Dicks instead. Come on. I’ll help you find someone to take your mind off your sister.”
I didn’t correct him by telling him it wasn’t Adriana I was missing.
“You’re going to go clubbing at Harry Dicks? What if I can’t keep all the men off you?” I teased. Mike was straighter than an arrow, but with his big muscled biker look, he often got mistaken for a leather daddy when he wound up at gay bars with me. Guys fucking loved him and swarmed around every chance they got.
“It’ll be good for my ego,” he said with a wink. “My friend Ron will get a kick out of seeing me get more offers of dick than he does. Jax, you in?”
Jax’s face turned even pinker. “Really? I can come with you guys? That’d be awesome. Coco, are you coming?”
“Hell no. Ain’t nothing for me there but sweaty-ass dancing and candy that says look but don’t touch. I think I’ll head home and settle for a night in with my favorite vino and some binge-watching on Netflix. You guys have fun though. And feel free to text me pictures of your conquests.”
I thought about begging off, but I was actually horny as hell. Maybe a random fuck would replace my memories of West Wilde in bed. I could just go out to the clubs, find someone to fuck, and come home unencumbered by all the feelings bullshit. Remind myself why it was nice not feeling emotionally obligated to another person.
By the time I met up with Mike and Jax at Harry Dicks, I had a pocket full of condoms and a goal of finding some cute twinkie ass to get into. It was time to get back on the horse.
Several hours later, I caught an Uber home in a foul mood. I’d been pawed at, dry-humped, and propositioned by any number of cute men and was so pissed off at my dick for its blatant disregard for my feelings that I had half a mind to thump it with my finger in disgust.
“Lame-ass bastard. Don’t tell me you’re too old to get it up for hot guys anymore,” I muttered at my crotch. “Traitor.”
I knew the truth, of course. That fucker had been spending too much time chitchatting with my heart. Probably listening to silly notions about how there should be feelings involved before getting it up for someone.
Stupid, stupid heart.
After thanking the driver, I made my way into the shop and up the back stairs to my apartment. It was lonelier than it had ever been, and I fell into a massive pity party.
I thought about what my friends had said earlier in the shop, that I’d been in a funk since getting back from Hobie. It was true. I felt like I was missing something. Somethings.
Of course, I missed West terribly. His calm demeanor, his tender touch, his take-charge attitude. I missed Pippa with her chubby cheeks and chirpy waking-up sounds. I missed the crazy cowlick in the back of her hair that was going to drive her to drink when she grew up and tried to get it to stand down. I missed middle-of-the-night feedings when it was just us in the quiet house, rocking in her nursery and singing to her under my breath as she stared up at me dreamily.
I even missed the bakery. Painting cakes and brainstorming new ideas for designs the local customers and summer lake tourists would like. I’d gotten an email the day before from Rox with an update that things were running smoother now that we had a better bookkeeping system in place. She was happy managing it but said everyone had been asking about me since I’d left. It had taken all my self-control not to ask if she’d seen Pippa with the Warners.
As I fell asleep that night, I couldn’t help but imagine what it would be like if I had everything I wanted. What would that look like? West would be there for sure. And Pippa. But picturing them here in the city with me didn’t feel right. They belonged in Hobie. And I knew deep down there was a part of me that belonged in Hobie too. After those weeks I’d spent back in my hometown, the only person who still gave me hell by the end of it was Curt, and he was never going to change. Most everyone else had been friendly and welcoming after the initial shock of my reappearance had worn off.
I finally fell asleep in the wee hours of the morning only to have to get up for a client appointment a few hours later. I mainlined caffeine and grabbed a quick protein bar breakfast before making my way downstairs to open the shop.
The first client was a repeat visit to add to a sleeve I’d been working on for him for a while. He was happy with the addition and walked up front to pay Coco on his way out. I took a chance to refill my coffee in the back room before coming up to the reception counter to see who I had next on the schedule.
Mike, Jax, and Coco were all standing by the front counter peering out through the glass door of the shop.
“What is it?” I asked, stretching my neck to see what they were looking at.
“Cute guy with a stroller,” Coco said. “Check it out.”
Just then, the bell dinged over the door and the cute guy walked into the shop.
Dr. Weston Wilde. With Pippa.
My heart leaped in my chest. He looked so handsome and strong. The beautiful man I’d resisted opening up to for so long. Just seeing him there took my breath away and did stupid things to my stomach. But he looked tired too. Most likely from trying to juggle his jobs along with a newborn. I’d been so selfish leaving her with him like I had.
“What are you doing here?” I asked, hurrying over to where he stood by the door and peeking down at her in the stroller. She looked happy as a clam, and I reached out to cup my hand over her little fuzzy head. “Is she okay? Why isn’t she with the Warners? What happened? It’s been three weeks, West. Did something happen? Did the adoption fall through?”
I couldn’t stop babbling out of fear something had gone wrong after I left. I’d been so selfish, leaving without saying a proper goodbye to him. But I’d thought he’d only have to have her a few days until the adoption went through. Maybe it was a sign. Maybe if the Warners hadn’t adopted her, it was a sign she was meant to be mine.
West opened his mouth, but before he had a chance to speak, I blurted, “I’ll take her. I’ll adopt her, West. Please tell me it’s not too late.”
“It’s not too late.” His face split into a grin as he stepped closer, arms reaching out to pull me in for a hug. How could that be? How could he possibly want to hug me after I’d been so awful to him?
Rather than looking a gift horse in the mouth, I stepped into his embrace and wrapped my arms around him to hold on tight. His arms came around me and pulled me in close. Good god, how I’d missed the two of them.
I inhaled his familiar smell and wanted to cry from the comfort of it. My face found his neck, and I reached out my lips to taste the skin there.
“I missed you so much.” I breathed. “I’m sorry for the way I left.”
“Nico.” He sighed. “I’m sorry too. You have no idea how much I missed you, sweetheart.”
My heart did a double take at the endearment, and my arms squeezed him even tighter. I wouldn’t let him go again. I just couldn’t.
I pulled back just enough to meet his eyes.
“I love you,” I said, expecting to feel abject terror at the words. Or embarrassment about saying something so personal in front of my employees. But I didn’t. I felt relief. It bubbled up, pushing a laugh out of me. “I love you, you big dumb jerk. Why are you here?”
West’s face had morphed from shock to happiness, and his smile was like the sun on a hot, Texas day.
“I’m here because I love you too. I came to bring you home with me. With us.”
I felt my throat constrict as I realized what he was saying. “Really? You came to get me?”
“I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t give Pippa up when she was my last link to you. You and I can love her more than anyone else in the world. Come home.”
> “You came to get me?” I asked again, feeling light-headed. “To bring me home?”
“Someone should have done it a long time ago, Nico,” West said gently. “I came to get you, and I’m not leaving here without you. If you’re not ready to go or if you don’t see yourself in Hobie, we’ll move here.”
“But what about your practice? Your big Wilde family? Xavier?” I asked without thinking.
“I can practice medicine anywhere. My big Wilde family knows how to use the airport. And why the hell are you asking me about my ex-boyfriend?”
“He moved back. Everyone knows you two would be perfect together,” I said stupidly, sounding like a petulant child. Apparently, I couldn’t stop myself.
West’s eyes sparkled. “Nicolas Salerno, has anyone ever told you that opposites attract? Plus, been there, done that with Xavier. He has no fire or passion. I don’t want perfect. I want you. And you have to admit, you’re about as fiery and passionate as they come.” He winked at me before leaning down to seal my mouth with his.
The kiss was possessive and meaningful, rife with promises and beginnings. I didn’t want it to end, but the catcalls from my employees seeped into my awareness, causing me to pull back, cheeks flaming at the realization all that shit had happened in front of their noses.
Coco jutted out a hip. I noticed Jax had snuck Pippa out of her stroller and was making faces at her.
“You gonna introduce us to your new sugar daddy or just put us on a show?” Coco teased. “Not that I’m complaining.”
I sighed, feeling myself begin to let go of the weight I’d been carrying around for so long. My hand reached out for West’s, threading our fingers together with a gentle squeeze.
“Yeah, okay. Guys, this is West Wilde. West, this is Mike, Jax, Coco. They make this place run,” I explained, waving to the crew and then the shop. While he shook hands, I looked around at the result of my years of hard work and dedication in that tattoo shop. The memories, the ups and downs. I’d lived and worked there for almost a decade.
But it was time to take the Nico I’d become in San Francisco and join it with the Nico I’d always been in Hobie. I wasn’t all of one or the other. I was a combination of the two, and I was ready to find my new normal.
“Give me that baby,” I told Jax with a grin. He handed her over reluctantly, and I pulled her in close, sniffing the baby wash smell of her and nuzzling her hair. “Did your daddy pick out your outfit today? Because, girl, we need to talk,” I murmured into her ear. “From now on, I’m the one you come to for fashion, not Dr. Boring Khaki Pants over there.”
“I heard that,” West said. “Don’t even think about putting her in leather, Nico.”
I ignored him and kept talking to Pippa. “Come here and let me show you some cute little tattoos you’ll like when you get a little older. Surely he’ll let us give you at least one.”
“Nico…,” he warned.
“And piercings, just think of all the tender skin we can put holes in when you—”
West’s arms came around me from behind, and he took my earlobe between his teeth. “Don’t even think about it, beautiful. All your piercings do is make me hornier for you. I don’t want a single piercing on her body. Everyone will want to get into her pants.”
I smiled and turned to kiss him. “Which one of those three clowns should we leave in charge of Pippa for the next hour while we run upstairs?”
His eyebrows furrowed. “Why? What do you need to do?”
“You.”
Epilogue
West—Two months later
It was a week from Christmas, and we were heading to Doc and Grandpa’s house for their big holiday party. The weather was plenty cold, and I was secretly excited about the bonfire we’d end up having later in the night.
Pippa was seven months old and teething like a son of a bitch. Several of my patients had gotten a huge kick out of seeing me finally realize how ridiculous recommending homeopathic treatments were. No amount of gumming a frozen treat made up for a good, solid dose of baby pain reliever. Her cheeks were rosy from the teething and the cold, but she was having a rare moment of giggly happiness while Nico sang a ridiculous song he’d picked up somewhere about teapots and spouts.
I couldn’t help but stare at him as he held her while he drifted back and forth on the wide swing in the backyard. He’d had the wooden seat engraved with our three names, and ever since then, I’d noticed him bringing her out here more and more despite the December weather.
When I’d asked him about it, he’d blushed and admitted he wanted to start some family traditions that were all our own. Special things that were just for Pippa so that she would feel the importance of what being in a family meant. I’d noticed when he’d had the freshly carved seat put back on, he’d raised the height so my knees wouldn’t be bent up by my chest anymore.
There were more and more times lately when I noticed him making little gestures of unspoken kindness for me. If I pointed them out, he’d scoff at me and deny them to his dying breath, but only minutes later, I’d see him do something else sweet like that. He was thoughtful and kind even if he was still having trouble owning that side of himself.
We’d gotten lucky when he’d decided to make the big move to Texas. Mike and Coco had gotten together and offered to buy the tattoo shop from him, and we were able to stop the sale of Adriana’s house in time for Nico to move into it.
When he’d first gotten back to town, we’d had an awkward period of time when we weren’t sure if we were moving way too fast. By unspoken agreement, we’d kept both our places. But I’d ended up staying at his place every single night until he finally mentioned moving my shit over and making it permanent a few weeks ago.
His little house was tight, so I’d left most of my furniture upstairs at the practice. I wondered if maybe it gave him peace of mind that one or the other of us had a place to go if things got tough between us. Neither of us were naive enough to think it was going to be easy. In fact, I’d suggested going to see a family counselor I knew from the hospital in order to help us with the transition from two single men to a couple with a baby in the span of just a few months.
To be honest, our situation was rife with possible land mines, but I was still surprised when Nico agreed. We’d been going for a few weeks, and I already noticed feeling less pressure to try to make things easy and “right” for Nico. I knew he needed to find his own way as he settled into life in Hobie. I could be there for him, but I couldn’t fix his problems or face his challenges for him.
He’d gone back to painting cakes at the bakery, which he loved, and he was expanding into the space above the bakery to open a small tattoo shop. I’d introduced him to a friend I knew at the nearby military base, and he’d talked with him for a long time about the need for someplace closer than Dallas to get ink.
I had enough money to support both of us, but Nico didn’t want to feel beholden to me for that kind of support. In the end we both agreed to try to figure out a way we could at least make sure Pippa had us around as much as possible.
Doc and Grandpa had offered to help. When Nico couldn’t take Pippa to work with him or work from home with her, Doc or Grandpa would watch her or Nico could bring her to my office and my receptionist Morgan could play with her for a while. It wasn’t foolproof, but we’d try it for a while until things settled down and we learned what might work better.
“You ready?” Nico asked with a smile as he stood up from the swing and began walking toward the front of the house. “My first Wilde holiday party, huh? Gonna be nuts?”
“Yep. It’s a shame you missed Halloween. That’s the best one they do.” I shifted Pippa’s backpack on my shoulder before reaching for Nico’s free hand.
“I’ve heard. Next year, huh?”
I looked over at him and grinned. “Yeah, next year. We’ll have to come up with a costume. This year I just took her as a sleeping baby because I was too sleep-deprived to think of anything else.”
&nbs
p; After arriving at Doc and Grandpa’s, we made our way into the house amid shouts of greeting from friends and family. Predictably, Doc stole the baby right out from Nico’s arms and took off with her. I was sure he was planning on showing her off to anyone and everyone, as if they hadn’t seen her a million times. She seemed to love the attention though, smiling and giggling whenever someone made silly faces at her.
“You sure we didn’t need the Pack ’n Play?” Nico asked in a whisper.
“They have one of their own, remember? It lives in the guest room although I’m surprised they haven’t turned it into a nursery yet for how often she’s over here.”
“We have,” a voice chuckled behind us. I turned to see Grandpa and gave him a kiss on the cheek. “The nursery is finally done. Check it out. You’d better be leaving her with us tonight, boys. Doc’ll flip if you don’t.”
“Oh, please, twist our arm,” Nico responded deadpan.
Grandpa laughed and led us back to the room beside theirs. The walls were a sunny yellow, and there was a brand-new crib set up against one wall. An old rocking chair I recognized sat in the corner with new cushions that matched the curtains and crib sheets. A small bookcase sat next to the rocker and held stacks of picture books, some ancient-looking and some obviously brand-new.
Before we had a chance to gush to Grandpa, someone asked for his help down the hall.
Nico turned to me with wet eyes. He’d been doing that a lot lately. I wondered if, now that the floodgates were open, he was having trouble getting back into the habit of shoving his emotions aside. Whatever the reason was, I was glad to see him letting his feelings out.
I pulled him in for a hug and cupped his cheeks. “You okay, tough guy?” I teased quietly.
“Why would they go to all this trouble?” he asked.
“Because they love her. They’re her family, our family. That’s what families do,” I said without thinking. The word “family” seemed to hit him like a barb. “Shit, Nico. I’m sor—”