“Kayleigh?”
“I don’t mind sitting here with you. It just feels so…” she hesitated.
“So?” he prompted.
“It just feels a little…intimate.” There, she’d said it. He raised an eyebrow at her choice of words and now she felt the need to explain. “I mean, you’re my boss, I barely know you and yet here I am, sitting here in a dimly lit room in your home, feeding your child, while I’m barely dressed.” Well, maybe she could have left that last part out. Kayleigh could have bitten her own tongue off at her own stupidity.
Derek’s eyes grazed over her. She did look delectable with her long hair mussed up from sleeping, the snug tank top that hid nothing and revealed the fullness of her breasts and the moonlight shone on the silkiness of her legs. With Emery curled in her lap, she looked like a Madonna. He swallowed hard and tried to think of something to say to put her mind at ease, but by the startled look on her face, he knew that she could read his mind.
Kayleigh was the first to look away – focusing her attention on the baby in her arms. Emery was nearly finished eating and soon would need to go back to sleep. Most nights Kayleigh enjoyed sitting in the dark cuddling her, but tonight she was just hoping to survive having sitting here under Derek’s thorough perusal of her.
Would there be a graceful way to jump up with the baby and run from the room or would she end up looking like some frightened little girl? Good lord, the last thing that she wanted to do was to look like more of a fool in front of him.
Derek resumed eating and after another forkful of food asked, “So, how is Emery during the day? What kind of schedule is she on?” Kayleigh breathed a sigh of relief at the direction of the conversation. If he had asked her anything personal she was unsure of how she would have responded.
“She’s settled in quite nicely. She gets up around eight and by eleven is back down for a short nap. After lunch we’ve started going out for walks since the weather has been so lovely. She really seems to enjoy that. I think she’s settled into a schedule of eating every four hours.”
“That doesn’t give you much rest at night, does it?” he queried.
Kayleigh laughed a little and the action brought Derek’s eyes first to her smile – which he was coming to adore – and then to her breasts which were shaking under the thin ribbed material. “I was kind of aware of the sleep deprivation aspect of the job. I figured I could handle it on a temporary basis.”
Lifting Emery to her shoulder, she began patting her back and talking softly to her. “She’s really a wonderful baby. You’re very fortunate to have her.”
Derek’s eyes shot to hers in a near state of alarm. For the last several days it had been almost possible to forget the situation he was in. Kayleigh had been nearly invisible, as was Emery. His home still looked like his home on the downstairs – upstairs was another story all together. He had a private investigator working on trying to find out who the child’s mother was, but so far he’d had no luck. Of all the irresponsible times for Brian to leave the country!
“Have you had any luck with contacting your brother?”
Derek polished off the last of food before answering. “Unfortunately, no. I do think that it would be wise to set up a paternity test so that maybe some things will be resolved by the time Brian does get back.” He leaned back in the chair and sighed. “Who knew that one little person could change a life so much?”
Kayleigh wanted to remind him that thanks to her, his life really hadn’t changed so much. He had taken no real interest in Emery since Kayleigh had moved in and if it weren’t for this chance meeting in the kitchen, he still wouldn’t know what was going on. But it was late and now was not the time for hashing these things out. Eventually the situation would have to be dealt with and she would move on with her life and so would he. Snuggling Emery close, she only hoped that it would be an easy transition for all of them.
“I think she’s ready to go back to sleep,” Kayleigh whispered; her voice bringing Derek out of his own thoughts.
“Thank you for sitting with me,” he said quietly, careful not to startle the sleeping child. “And thank you for dinner. I wasn’t looking forward to eating microwave popcorn.” He smiled and Kayleigh though her heart would melt. It was devastating. Seeing Derek in this environment was going to make it so much harder to see him around the office when this was all over. “Good night, Kayleigh.” He stood as she did and for a brief moment she thought he was going to walk over to her. Instead he placed his hands in his pockets and stood rooted to the spot.
“Good night, Derek.” Turning, she walked into the foyer and up the stairs, thankful for the darkness that swallowed her form and hid the nervous trembling of a body too aware of the man in the living room.
****
The rest of the week flew by. Derek had to go out of town for several days on business and that left Kayleigh at ease around his home. She and Emery were bonding and had developed a routine where they went out frequently. It was a suggestion that both her brother and his wife Sarah had presented her with – get the child used to being on the go and soon enough, you should be able to take her anywhere without a fuss. Amazingly enough, it worked.
They went food shopping together and had an outing to the mall just for the fun of it. Once again she was assaulted by the amount of decorations up proclaiming that it was almost Valentine’s Day. Wasn’t there another way of doing it without be so…obnoxious? The red balloons and hearts and flowers were everywhere and all it managed to do was make Kayleigh hate the holiday even more.
It had been so long since Kayleigh had had so much free time that she was unsure of what to do with herself. A single woman on a limited salary had few options with what to spend her money on. Derek had given her a credit card for groceries and necessities for Emery and she tried not to abuse the privilege. There were lunches out with friends and even a night with Kayleigh’s family where Emery was the star attraction even among all of the grandchildren.
It was while at her parent’s house that Kayleigh found herself wondering about the little girl’s future. She knew that Derek’s parents had died many years ago and that both he and Brian had been raised essentially by their grandparents. What kind of family would that be for Emery? It broke her heart to think that the child might never know the closeness that the Mitchell’s had. If Derek were her father, would he put her in boarding school so that parenthood wouldn’t disrupt his career? Would Brian hire some hot nanny to care for her – and for him at night? Ugh, the thought of it all sickened her.
Her mother noticed the frown on her face and inquired of its source. Kayleigh was sitting on the couch in her parent’s den, watching her charge sleep on a blanket on the floor. “I just hate the fact that Emery may never know what it’s like to be part of a loving family.”
“That’s a pretty big assumption to make, don’t you think?” Kathleen Mitchell asked. As the matriarch of such a large family, you’d never guess her age to be over 50. She was the older version of Kayleigh - short, dark auburn hair streaked with silver and more laugh lines on her face, but still a vision.
“You haven’t met the Sloan brothers.”
“What about their grandparents? What do they think of this whole situation?”
Kayleigh had wondered about that very thing and assumed that Derek didn’t want to burden them until they knew for sure who Emery belonged to. She shared that theory with her mother.
“What if the mother comes back and has a large family?”
Kayleigh chewed her bottom lip. That though had never occurred to her and now it angered her. After deserting the child, she felt that the birth mother had given up any rights to the precious baby. And if that woman happened to be a former lover of Derek’s and they married and…and…Oh! Just the thought of Derek with another woman raising Emery made her want to cry.
“I guess we’ll just have to wait and see,” Kayleigh said softly and quickly asked about her nieces and nephews interests to take the focus off of he
rself. Kathleen wasn’t fooled. She saw that her daughter was forming quite an attachment to the baby – and her boss. It was all too emotional right now and quietly decided that this was one time that she was going to have to just sit back and let nature take its course. There was bound to be a broken heart in the near future but it was Kayleigh’s choice. She just knew that she needed to be ready with the Kleenex and a shoulder to cry on when the time arrived.
****
Derek arrived home late Sunday night and found himself anxious to be there. A glance at his watch showed it to be barely after midnight. Would they be awake? Would Kayleigh remember that he was due home and have food waiting for him?
Geez, get a grip man, He admonished himself. She’s the nanny, not your wife, for crying out loud. That thought stopped him cold. He never imagined himself coming home to a wife and kids – it just didn’t fit into his plans – but somehow, in this last week, the thought became less scary and more appealing. After all, if Emery was his and her mother never came back, he’d need someone to care for her. Wouldn’t it be better if that caretaker was his wife rather than the hired help?
Shaking his head at his wayward thoughts, he slipped the key into the lock and went inside. Re-setting the alarm, he heard Kayleigh’s voice coming from the living room. Quietly dropping his bags by the door, he walked towards her and stood in the shadows and observed.
She was sitting on the couch this time, curled into the far corner. Emery was suckling loudly on her bottle and Kayleigh was singing a lullaby to her. He actually felt an ache in his chest that he’d never felt before. Stepping forward slowly, Kayleigh noticed him and smiled – never once breaking the song she was singing or alerting the baby that anyone else was there.
Her heartbeat accelerated wildly. He actually looked relieved to be home and though he was slightly rumpled from his travels – a far cry from the model of perfection he presented at the office – he still looked good enough to eat, Kayleigh thought as he came further into view.
Loosening his tie, Derek advanced in to the room. “Hi,” he said softly, walking behind the sofa to get a better look at Emery. “How’s she doing?”
Looking up at him and willing the tremor out of her voice, she replied, “Fine. She’s going for a little longer between bottles and so our nights are getting better.”
“That’s good,” he said, his eyes still on the baby. It seemed like an eternity before he moved away and headed for the kitchen.
Before he could even ask Kayleigh called out, “There’s a plate for you in the refrigerator.” Derek smiled without turning around. So she had remembered that he was coming home. That thought pleased him immensely.
Within minutes, he was seated across from her in the living room inhaling the wonderful aroma of grilled salmon Florentine. Kayleigh was equally pleased that he seemed to enjoy this one little thing that she did for him. “Thank you,” he said before taking a taste. “You seem to enjoy cooking. Did your mother teach you?” he asked. Kayleigh knew there’d come a time when they’d talk about themselves and now that it was here, she wasn’t quite sure how she felt. She’d wanted Derek Sloan for so long and getting to know him was a good thing – well, that and living in his home – but she still found herself to be shy around him.
“I come from a pretty large family, as you know. I’m the youngest of four and mom was always in need of an extra hand in the kitchen. Since that was where everyone usually was, that’s where I wanted to be. I’ve been concocting recipes since I was around six years old. It’s really not fun cooking for only one person, though, so this has been a treat to have someone else to cook for.”
Oh, God! Did that just sound like a desperate attempt at getting him to ask her to cook for him permanently? Stupid, stupid, stupid!
“You’re very talented. I can’t remember the last time I had real home-cooking. Since my grandparents retired, I don’t see them much. But then again,” he added with a chuckle, “my grandmother wasn’t all that into cooking. She was as invested in the business as my grandfather was and we always had a housekeeper who prepared meals for us.”
Kayleigh felt sad for him and even more so for Emery again. The more she learned about the Sloan’s the sadder it made her. “My grandmother was always in the kitchen. She was baking pies and cooking huge Sunday dinners up until the day she died,” Kayleigh said with a sigh. “I am so thankful for all that she taught me. Every little girl should have that kind of influence in her life.”
As soon as the words were out, she regretted them. She didn’t mean to imply anything about his family or Emery’s future, but something inside of her just couldn’t seem to help it. Her mind raced as she thought of something intelligent to say to cover up her blunder. “I mean …um…”
“It’s okay, Kayleigh,” Derek assured. “You were very fortunate to have those influences in your life. I can only hope that someday Emery has a mother figure who’ll guide her.” Not the mother, just a mother figure. Hmm, interesting.
They sat in silence while Derek finished his meal. As he sat back to relax, he focused on Kayleigh again, eager to learn more about her even at this late hour. “When you’re not saving helpless bachelors and abandoned infants, what do you like to do with your spare time?”
Had he phrased it any other way, she might have stumbled on a reply, but worded so playfully, she couldn’t help but chuckle. “Well, when my red-cape is safely packed away,” she said cheekily, “I enjoy spending time with my family and babysitting my nieces and nephews. They seem to take up most of my spare time, come to think of it; probably because I’m a free babysitter.” She paused and thought about her family with a smile. “I don’t mind, really.”
“What do you do for fun? Do you have friends that you go out with or a boyfriend?”
Ah, now we’re getting deep. “I go to an occasional movie with friends or shopping at the outlets and as for a boyfriend,” she glanced up at him shyly, “not at the moment.”
He made a non-committal sound and Kayleigh hoped that this part of the conversation was over. Emery was sound asleep in her arms and Kayleigh was ready to put her back in her crib. Standing carefully she looked down at Derek in the chair. “I hope that you enjoyed your dinner. I’m going to put Emery down and head back to sleep myself.”
He made that sound again, but said no more. As she walked away Derek noticed tonight’s sleeping attire – a faded Whitesnake concert t-shirt and silk pajama pants. There was nothing sexy about the ensemble and yet it had his mind racing more than any lingerie model ever had.
Upstairs, Kayleigh put Emery down and kissed the top of her cute little head. Little wisps of blonde hair were starting to emerge. Soon she’d be able to put bows in it and cute little headbands… no, she thought sadly, someone else would get to do that. Kayleigh wouldn’t be around that much longer. With a sigh, she turned to leave the room and bumped into the very solid frame of Derek Sloan.
He wrapped an arm around her waist to steady her and Kayleigh felt all of the breath leave her body.
Oh, my.
“Sorry,” she whispered, slowly raising her eyes to see his face. His expression was cast in shadows and from what she could see, he looked very serious and as his eyes scanned her face, she watched his expression change to one of wonder and desire.
Oh, my.
Kayleigh tried to find something to say to that would enlighten her on what was about to happen but she was too afraid of breaking the spell. Memories of the kiss that they’d shared on that fateful first afternoon together flashed through her mind. She had dreamt about it countless times and never thought she’d have the opportunity to experience it again. But as Derek’s head began its slow descent, she thanked her creator for making it possible.
“Kayleigh,” he whispered raggedly before his lips touched hers. They were firm at first, but when Kayleigh sagged against him with a sigh and opened for him, his desire unleashed.
Derek wasn’t sure of exactly why he’d followed her up the stairs. It hadn’t
been his intention to come up here and kiss her, but something happened when her body made contact with his and it was all he could do to hold back as long as he did. Since the moment he’d first noticed her in his office he had thought about touching her, kissing her. Even after their brief kiss the day of Emery’s arrival, he’d wanted to explore his attraction to her further.
By this point, Kayleigh had wound her arms around his neck and with Derek’s arms banded around her tiny waist; he had her pulled tightly against his body. She felt so good against him that he wanted to carry her out of the nursery and to the nearest horizontal surface.
Over and over he nipped at her mouth, his tongue mating with hers – imitating what his body wanted to be doing with hers. She met his every passionate response and clearly wanted this as much as he did. Moving one hand away from her waist, it journeyed slowly up her ribcage to gently cup one glorious breast. It felt exquisite in his hand – he knew it would. Kayleigh had a fantastic figure, he admitted to himself, one that he’d love to be touching all over this very moment.
Just as that thought was registering, he felt her begin to pull away. “Derek,” she said breathlessly, “I can’t.”
Her words slowly sank in. Can’t? Can’t what? He raised his head and looked down into her flushed face. Her lips were moist and swollen from his kisses and her breathing was still a little erratic. He liked that.
“I’m sorry,” she said softly, “but this shouldn’t have happened.”
He gently took her hand in his and led her out of the nursery and into the dimly lit hallway. “Why?”
She expected him to be angry, but his softly spoken question had her asking herself exactly the same question. Why? With a fortifying breath she said, “It’s just that…you’re my boss and I’m here to take care of Emery. I don’t even want to think about what everyone back at the office must be thinking of this set up and I certainly don’t want to prove them right. I don’t do casual affairs, Derek. It’s just not who I am. I’m sorry.”
The Baby Arrangement Page 4