by C. M. Owens
More than once my fist connects with his face or body, and he doesn't hold back either. One shot to my mouth stuns me long enough for him to knock me off him, but he backs up instead of coming after me for more.
"I loved her, you stupid motherfucker!" I bark, spitting out my blood while wiping my mouth.
Kode staggers, his face bruised and beaten. The only shot at my face he took was the one that split my lip. He doesn't speak, and I don't hold back.
"I loved her. I wasn't fucking anyone. Rain was the first—my first. When do you think I was fucking anyone? I was always with her unless I was at practice or in class. I rarely even slept at our fucking house because I was in Rain's bed. How could you think I was screwing around with anyone else?"
Everyone around me looks stunned, and Kode drops to the couch, shocked. Britt comes into view, and I grimace. Fuck. I forgot Maverick said she was going to be here.
"Fuck, Dane. I didn't know. I wouldn't have... Shit! I'm sorry. I just thought..."
He can't even finish as he grips his head, and the guys exchange a look of confusion.
"Dane... I really am sorry. Had I known—"
"Just shut up and tell me what you did this time. She took off without telling me why again. What did you fucking do?"
Kode's eyes go wide as he frowns. "I didn't do anything. You loved her this time... I didn't know you loved her last time or I wouldn't have done anything then. I'm not that much of an asshole. I just wanted her to be happy. This time she was. Or at least, I thought she was."
I scrub my face with my hands as I drop to a couch, close to sobbing like a baby. I could have had her six years ago. Kode... stupid, ignorant asshole.
"You listened to me when I told you how I felt. I fucking told you everything."
"Not until two years ago, Dane. You didn't say a word about it until then, and you were drunk when you finally told me that you loved her. I felt like a douche then, but what was I supposed to say?"
"You should have told me!" I yell, glaring at him like I want a few more rounds.
"You're right," he concedes, slumping in defeat. "I can't tell you how sorry I am. I was stupid enough to think she'd look at me the way she always did you, and I was a bastard for doing that to you."
I clench my fist, wanting to punch him again, but I refrain as I drop my head back into my hands and let the tears fall discreetly.
"So no one knows why she left this time?" Britt asks softly, her voice calming me when it reminds me my sister is in the room, witnessing this meltdown.
"No," Maverick answers with a sigh.
"She just said it wasn't going to work, and she believed it because it wasn't a lie," I murmur without looking up, my voice breaking on the end.
"It was obviously something big that happened," Britt continues. "She told me the day before she left that she wanted to take me shopping. I know I suck at reading people, but if she was planning on leaving, she wouldn't have been making future plans. We were even going to cook you a surprise dinner."
I know she's trying to help, but it's only making my heart hurt worse.
"When I left her that morning, she kissed me and told me she loved me. When I got home, she was in the process of moving out. I wasn't even there to fuck anything up."
Everyone breathes out wearily as we search for reason in the illogical. "Maybe she'll write another fucking book to explain it, because it's obvious she can't just talk to me," I mutter dryly, managing to regain some composure as my anger returns.
"They can call it, Gallbladder Surgery Rekindles Forgotten Romance," Corbin adds with a small snicker.
Dale shakes his head in disapproval, and Corbin's laughter tapers off as he coughs and looks away shamefully.
"She had gallbladder surgery, too?" Britt asks while coming to sit beside me, placing her body on the arm of the chair.
"It's the surgery she had when I went to stay with her," I explain, still trying to wrap my mind around things, going over every detail of that morning.
She was smiling when I left.
"No. She had a hysterectomy," Britt argues.
My head leaves my hands as I study her. She seems certain she's right.
"No. It was gallbladder surgery. Why do you think it was a hysterectomy? Did she say something like that?"
Britt stands while shrugging. "You don't let me ask personal questions like that. I saw the scars on the lower abdomen—the two small cuts. I looked up what they could be. They fit a hysterectomy. Gallbladder cuts are higher, and there are usually more of them. And considering her mother and grandmother had endometrial cancer—or uterus cancer—it makes sense that Rain would most likely have it, too. Especially after her close call with breast cancer. And you had sex exactly six weeks after the surgery. That's the typical wait time."
Maverick and Corbin chuckle lightly at that last bit, but I'm too distracted.
I lean back, taking a deeper breath than I've had in a month as I try to digest all of this. "Why would she lie?"
Kode looks up, shaking his head. "Because it's Rain. If she had any sort of cancer, she probably wouldn't tell a soul after last time. It made her feel insecure, lost, and embarrassed. She fails to see how much we all care about her."
"Wait, Rain had cancer?" Maverick asks, finally grasping the important part of the story.
"And she didn't fucking tell us?" Corbin barks, also catching on.
"I'm kicking her ass," Dale gripes.
"I wish she had balls to kick," Corbin grumbles. "If anyone deserves a shot to the balls, it's her right now."
"That's why she left. She still has cancer," Maverick panics, and I almost throw up.
"No," Britt says quickly. "Considering Rain has an appointment book full of doctor's visits, I think she keeps a close eye on things. They would have caught it early, and the hysterectomy would have most likely taken care of it. Not to mention, she just went to the doctor a week before she left and came home in a great mood. I'm assuming all was clear on the scan. That wouldn't have changed in a week, and besides, she didn't go to the doctor after that."
My panic subsides somewhat, but everyone is still tense. "Then why?" I groan.
Kode curses as he jumps up from his chair and dashes to his dining room. He comes running back in holding his iPad. "When did that article come out on you? The one where the chick was supposed to interview all of us and Rain, but she only interviewed you instead."
"I don't know... why?"
"It came out the day Rain left," Britt says, her eidetic memory kicking in. "Do you need me to recite the article?"
Kode curses again as he hands me the iPad. "No, but thanks. I found it." He turns to me as I stare at the screen, confused. Why do I need to read my own interview?
"Read it. The part after she talks about Tag."
Lisa: What about you? Any children on the horizon?
Me: I'd love nothing more than to have a houseful of children. That's actually something I've given a lot of thought to for the past few years.
My stomach rolls with a wave of nausea, and I close my eyes as I try to get a grip.
"What? What the fuck?" Maverick prompts, taking the iPad from my lifeless hands.
"Oh shit," he says seconds later.
"Which part is disturbing?" Britt asks obliviously.
"Dane wants a houseful of children," Kode groans. "She left you because she couldn't give you kids. Rain's always wanted kids, too. Shit! She should have fucking told someone!"
He slaps the wall, and I fold over, dropping my head to almost meet my knees. She left because I made her think she wouldn't be enough. Fuck!
"She kept saying it wouldn't work because she believed that," I mumble. "She chose those words carefully so she wouldn't have to lie. I'm such a dick."
"You didn't know she couldn't have children," Britt interjects, defending me.
My heart rips a little more. Rain is somewhere dealing with this on her own, and no one is there to convince her to come back to me.
"Tria. Tria might know wh
ere she's at," I say quickly.
Kode grabs his keys to his Range Rover, and everyone stands.
"You're not going without us," Dale says, answering the unasked question.
I just nod, because he's right. We're going to kick her ass together, after I tell her I fucking love her and make her listen to me. I didn't go after her last time. This time I won't make that mistake.
"You have to tell me, Tria," I beg. Tria stands guarded by the door in front of her, keeping it locked as she speaks through the glass.
Five Sterlings showing up at her front door had to be her worst nightmare come true.
"Dane, I want to help, but Rain would kill me. It's been a month. She's just now learning to get along without you."
"She left me, Tria. Not the other way around. I still can't function. I know about the hysterectomy. The kids... I know why she left. I have to go to her. I have to tell her she's enough."
"You didn't go after her the last time," Tria scolds, uncharacteristically glaring at me.
She's been so quiet and sweet since I spoke to her that first day after Rain came back.
I could tell the truth. God knows Kode deserves Rain's hatred, but Rain has already forgiven me for the letter she thinks I ignored. She might not ever forgive Kode, and he's been her best friend for the past six years—even though it was only because he pushed me out of her life. Giving her a reason to hate Kode would hurt Rain, and I can't do that to her.
"I know. I fucked up then. I was a stupid kid, and I should have gone after her."
Kode stares at me, dumbfounded, but then he nods in appreciation for the lie I just told. The other guys exchange a knowing look, understanding why I just covered up his betrayal, and they play along instead of voicing the truth.
Tria blows out a breath while running a hand through her hair, and she finally unlocks the door, allowing us to come in.
We all shuffle through, but I'm almost invading her personal space as I wait expectantly.
"What the hell happened in here?" Kode asks, distracting me.
It's then I look around to see her house destroyed. Glass is shattered all around, her walls are cracked, and she's wearing a pair of boxer shorts, a tank top, and... boots?
"I had... well, you're not the only one with problems," she says with a shrug.
I start to ask her what happened, but Rain is taking precedent right now.
"Who did this?" Kode asks before I can press for more information.
"I did it. That's everything my father bought me. Long story. If you want to find Rain, they're filming in Florida. That's where she set the book. She's in Panama City. They're staying in several condos down there, but they film almost all day. You can't get on the set without fifty pounds of credentials, so it'd be best to wait until nightfall when she returns to her place. I'll give you the address, but I'll never speak to you again if you make her mad at me." She turns her back before adding in a mutter, "Not that anyone from this group cares if I ever speak again or not."
I wish I had time to argue, but right now I can only think about Rain.
"I'll call my pilot," Kode says while turning his back and pulling out his phone.
Tria turns around with a piece of paper in her hand, and I take it before giving her a hug and surprising her.
"Thank you. You have no idea how much this means to me."
I'm out the door before anyone else, but everyone is on my heels, following me at my brisk pace. Then I run. The quicker we get there, the better.
Chapter 17
RAIN
"I'm beyond exhausted," I groan into the phone while dropping to the sofa with two pieces of pizza that I'm too lazy to heat up. "I'll call you tomorrow, Viv."
"Fine. But you'd better get used to the producer being in charge. Stop making so many waves or no one will ever want to work with you again."
I hang up on that. She's been on my ass since James Holbrook went in search of his inner Dean. Dumbass. Where do they find these guys?
My twentieth floor condo is nice, but I miss Sterling Shore.
At least it's not the summer. It doesn't get too cold here, and I've heard the summers are brutal, even worse than back home. If Dean Easton doesn't get any better than he is now, they may have to film in the summer though.
A knock at the door disrupts my short evening. My cold pizza will just have to wait a few more minutes.
Sluggishly, I make my way to the door, ready to curse whoever it is, but when I swing the door open without checking the window, I'm filled with regret. Five Sterlings are staring at me, all of them looking a little pissed. But the one I can't look away from is the one standing in front of them all.
"W-what are you doing here?" I stammer, too shocked to really react any other way.
"I'm here because you owe me an explanation. Why these assholes followed me, I don't know," Dane says, forcing a smile as he pushes through the door, his hands going to my waist and guiding me backwards.
The simple touch of his hands on me is enough to pump the blood through my veins too fast. I almost get dizzy as I step backwards, letting him work me through the small kitchen and into the living room.
"We're here because we deserve an explanation, too," Maverick says, his pout evident in his tone.
"Sorry. I've been busy," I murmur absently, too lost in Dane's green eyes to concentrate on anything else.
I thought I'd be okay after a month, but I'm just as in love with him today as I was the day I left. It also still hurts to know that I can't be with him.
"You're an idiot," Dale scolds, shocking me.
"And you're selfish," Maverick adds, prompting me to turn my head toward him as he crosses his arms over his chest.
"If you had balls, I'd punch you in them," Corbin adds, his jaw clenching as he finishes his odd threat.
What the hell?
"You really deserve to have your ass kicked. You'd better be glad we don't hit girls the way we hit each other," Kode snarls.
Speaking of hitting each other... Did he get into a fight? His eye is swollen, his lip is busted, and his cheek has a bruise. I look back to Dane who has the slightest tear on his lip, and I almost want to kiss it to make it better. He should really put some distance between us before I do something as stupid as that.
"What happened?" I ask, involuntarily reaching up to touch the spot on Dane's lip.
He leans his face into my hand, and he kisses the tip of my finger as he closes his eyes. It feels like he's missed me as much as I've missed him, and that hurts more than he knows.
"What happened to both of you?" I ask, looking toward Kode when Dane doesn't answer, but I don't remove my hand from Dane's face.
"Long story," Corbin interjects. "What we want to know is why you didn't fucking tell us you had cancer? Do you still have it? Britt says she doesn't think you do, but we want to know for sure. You'd better not lie to us, either. I'm already close to throwing your ass in the ocean as it is."
My heartbeat stills, and Dane leans over, pressing a kiss to my neck as his fingers go into my hair. No. They can't possibly know about this. I only told...
"Tria," I growl.
I can't believe I trusted her to—
"Tria didn't tell us shit," Kode fumes. "She fucking should have, considering we're closer to you than she's ever been. But you should have told us, Rain. What the hell were you thinking to deal with that alone? You know we're here for you. Is it gone?"
"It's gone," I sigh, watching them all visibly relax. "I didn't want you guys to worry. You would have thought it was worse than it was," I murmur softly, looking down.
"That morning after you bailed us out... you found out then, didn't you?" Maverick asks.
"That's why you wouldn't hardly eat anything. And that's why you lost it on Fiona like that," Corbin adds, sounding just as angry.
I just nod, refusing to meet their glowers.
"It was stupid, Rain," Dale chides. "You would have kicked my ass if I had something like that going on and I d
idn't tell you."
They've never talked to me like this. I've always put them in their places, but they've never done it to me. I don't like it. Not one bit. Because they're right. They deserved to know because they're my family, but it was my problem to deal with, dammit.
"You shouldn't have left me, Rain. I love you too much to lose you over something like this," Dane adds, his deep voice a velvety whisper in my ear.
I shiver against the touch I've missed, but I use all my strength to push him back.
"No. I won't be Eleanor," I shakily say once I've put some space between us.
His eyes glaze over with more hurt than I've ever seen, and I instantly feel like a piece of shit.
"You think I'd treat you like Edward treated her?" Dane asks, anger flaring in his eyes.
My other boys all get a little pissed, too, so I'm left with no option but to explain.
"There was a time when Edward thought Eleanor was everything he'd ever need. He knew she couldn't have children, and even though he wanted them, he gave up that hope just to marry her. But shit changes, Dane. People change. Resentment festers and ruins a relationship. I never want you to resent me, and one day you would. This is better. It hurts right now, but it won't destroy us the way—"
"Rain, you've lost your fucking mind. I'm not... I'd never be Edward, and I'll throw you over my shoulder and kidnap you if that's what it takes to prove it."
"We're all kidnapping her. She's coming home," Maverick interjects, now sounding bored.
"I'm good with a felony," Corbin says mildly, picking up a slice of my cold pizza. He takes a bite and quickly spits it back out. "Gross."
I can't smile because I'm too busy avoiding Dane's scowl.
"Dane, don't. Please. I won't always be enough. I want to leave knowing there was that small piece of time where I finally got to have you. Don't ruin it for me."
His eyes soften as he comes closer, and before I can react, he has me backed against the wall and caged in, his mouth on mine as he pours forth a month's worth of pent-up passion. It feels more like a lifetime's worth when his tongue slips in, and I have to grip onto his shoulders to keep from melting to the ground.