by Rose, Rhea
“I’m not a visitor,” he said, sternly.
I turned back to the window to finish tightening my tie and mouthed a few nasty things about Whitman. I envied the uniformed school girls in the yard. They looked bored but happy to be free, even if only for an hour, free from the rules and regulation of Little Blossoms Academy. The sun shone and if it weren’t for Christian Whitman and his ilk the world might actually be a friendlier place, or so I thought. Whitman left and I made my way out to the schoolyard to make sure the girls didn’t get into any trouble.
Outside most of the girls were busy chatting and eating. A few played a game of kickball with the younger ones and others had gone across the street to eat in the graveyard, generally forbidden, but I wasn’t going to call them back. I saw the smoke from the smokers escape from behind a big old maple tree, but I was more interested in seeing where Christian Whitman was headed. What was the big emergency that called him away from his higher duties at the academy? From a secluded spot, I watched Whitman go to his car and drive away in a black Mercedes, SUV.
I decided the girls were doing fine without me. Besides, the headmistress Mrs. Gottschalk was circling the yard and her heavy potato body wrapped as best it could in the burgundy and blue school uniform, headed like a wind filled flag for the graveyard. The girls spotted her and scattered like a school of fish, in all directions. I took the opportunity to do a quick walk to the staff parking lot, hopped into my car and followed Whitman.
I caught up with Whitman in no time. I had to be careful I didn’t follow him too closely because Meadowvale wasn’t a big city and he might recognize me.
I followed really closely anyway, right up to a stop light which turned green for him then red for me, stopping me from keeping up -- note to self – phone city about that light, crazy! By the time the light changed and I got through the intersection I’d lost him.
I got stuck at the next red light too; it seemed all the traffic lights were against me and stayed red for an extra long time. As I sat there waiting and waiting for a light change, I tried to figure out what Whitman might be up to. Lately he’d taken off at lunchtime disappearing until the end of the school day, which really wasn’t like him. Generally, he liked to wander the halls at the school looking for students to write up and teachers to reprimand.
Then, as I was about to give up because after the fourth red light, I thought I’d never catch up, I saw his car cut across an intersection two blocks ahead of me.
Ha, I know where you're headed.
My suspicions about him were soon confirmed when I saw Whitman pull into the local pub, the Wild Swan, famous for its lunch time stripping pole dancers! I drove myself to the Wild Swan and into the back lot where I knew a large stand of trees grew and parked there to conceal my presence.
Between the V of two trees I was able to watch Whitman climb from his car and head for the front door.
I stayed in my car and observed him struggle with a locked door. My first thought was, oh, oh, I hope he doesn’t see me when he turns around to leave, and I thought I better high tail it outta there and get back to the school before he did.
But he didn’t leave.
He pulled on the handle a few more times and then waited for someone to come open the door, when that didn’t happen, Whitman pulled out his ring of keys and like that, opened the door and went inside.
The suspense was killing me, so I pulled my car up into the closer parking lot and found an out –of- the- way- spot behind a big dumpster to leave my little car. I got out and crept up to the Tudor style establishment and crouched near a window.
I peeked in.
Through the window I saw a few patrons sitting at tables eating lunch and drinking, mostly men, but a few of them had dates. It was nearly pole dancing time so the stage stools were packed with guys. I scanned the crowd for Whitman thinking he might have a front row seat, but he wasn’t there, as I got braver and stepped in front of the window and looked around it appeared to be a private party inside the pub. Then I noticed the small hand written note on the door.
PRIVATE PARTY UNTIL 3 PM.
Whitman was arguing with a young woman I didn’t recognize. The slender, voluptuous young woman looked quite upset. He gripped her by one arm and tried to pull her to the exit. “In your dreams Whitman!”
Ha, if he thought he had any chance with her, he was delusional.
*
I’d already gone shopping by the time I came to Maisie’s shop this morning, as usual it looked like no one was manning the ship, but I’ve learned not to trust that observation. I hoisted my shopping bags onto the sales counter.
In this magic shop of curios I can never know if I’m being watched from a security camera or another dimension! On the sales counter sat an elaborately wrapped gift box and I couldn’t resist it. I made a bee-line to the box and began to open it. Then I heard a voice yelling out at me from the backroom. Of course - I knew being alone in the place for any length of time was too good to be true.
It was Maisie.
“How do you know that's for you?”
She stepped out of the tarot room and into the front of the shop. I gave her my old ah, come on, who else look. “Who else?” I added.
No sooner had I asked that then Emilia stepped out behind the petit Maisie. Ms. Emi was dressed in her black dobok and her aura of several sheathed swords also stuck out all around and beyond her fro, as usual.
“Hey, not-so-plain Jane. Beware of gifts from strangers,” she said,. I waved at her, one hand still on the gift. Once again I’d been summoned here by Maisie who was none too pleased at having lost a bundled brick of her cash to Devon’s pyrotechnic tendencies. Somehow I was to blame for that, so to make it up and get on with this game, Maisie had another assignment for me.
“I have a job for you,” Maisie said, getting straight to the point.
I really was beginning to get anxious when she said those words these days. I decided to make the best of it and hoped there’d be some cash reward money for me, which Maisie always promised but hadn’t yet delivered on.
“Will I catch me a tarot character?” I asked, gazing down at the gift.
“If you play your cards right.”
“Ha, ha,” Emi said sarcastically and we rolled eyes together and gave Maisie our twin sour faces.
“Groooan,” I added for emphasis. Then I decided to ignore them for a minute and lifted the lid off the box, but it was filled with folded and slightly scented tissue paper. The paper was soft and smelled like amber or vanilla, I wasn’t sure which and I thought there might a candle inside the box.
I carefully pulled up layer after layer of fine white paper and began to think I’d been tricked and that maybe there was nothing here. I picked up the box and shook it gently to check for weight and sound. There seemed to be something in there.
“There's a lot of tissue paper here but not a whole lot of – gift.”
Then I found it.
It was practically made of tissue paper itself. I held up a G-string with a bit of a beaded skirt. There were actually two pieces in there. I noticed the top to the outfit twinkling up at me from between the folds in the last pieces of paper at the bottom of the box. I grabbed it and held it up for the two women to see. The top and bottom fit in the palm of my hand. “Nice Barbie doll outfit,” I said. “Where’s the doll?”
When they didn’t say anything I said, “I think these are for you, Emi.” And handed them to her.
Emilia feigned surprise and slapped her hand to her chest. “Moi?" She said, shaking her head no and gave me a piercing look. She started to laugh.
What was funny?
“No way. I don't wear headbands.” Emilia said. I laughed and pointed at the one she was wearing.
I held the skimpy outfit out to Maisie. But as usual she’d left her funny bone in her cauldron of soup. Emi took the opportunity to use her sword and slide both pieces of the outfit onto the tip of her weapon.
“If this is a bribe, you've got
me all wrong,” I said, “I like to date, not do - whatever you do in these.”
“Dance,” Emi said, jiggling the outfit.
“Dance?” I echoed back at her.
“On a pole,” she added.
I looked to Maisie. Surely she wasn’t serious. Hell-smells if she didn’t nod an affirmation to Emilia’s explanation. That was my cue to laugh and I did have a good one. Emi slipped the costume of the tip of her sword back into the palm of my hand.
Emilia’s hilarious side got the better of her. She stepped out and began to strut her stuff which wasn’t very sexy in a martial arts uniform. My laughter at her antics got the best of me. I had to cross my legs to prevent myself from peeing, she was soo funny. She walked like an Egyptian and then sidled into a version of the Macarena and ended with some crazy gangnem moves!
I lost it and laughed till I cried.
“You're not the only one around here with a few hot moves,” Emi said.
“I'd be hot, too, if I was wearing all that.” I tugged on a corner of her uniform and then walked away. When I looked back at her, Emi had stopped dancing and stretched her sword tip toward me. I saw that she was after a piece of the costume I held. I dangled it out to make it easier for her to touch. She lifted it away and began jiggled it down her sword so that it slowly slid down toward her.
I took a quick glance at Maisie to see how she was handling this. She looked mildly amused but her arms folded across her chest. I knew enough to know that this was the first sign of concern. Emilia always seemed oblivious of Maisie’s moods.
“The Wild Swan,” Maisie said.
Emilia and I exchanged a glance.
“That's a strip club,” I reminded her.
“Uh, huh. A man there cheated me out of money, a long time ago. Still he owes me,” she said and gave me a sisterly look.
“What’s new?”
“He works the Swan,” she continued.
“You think?
“Pretty sure. Yeah, it was some kind of Ponzie scheme, long ago,” she said and then she paused a moment and got all starry eyed, something I didn’t think was possible for Maisie, the all-business-woman.
“You worked there, Maisie?” I asked her. She surprised me. I never took her as the type who’d dance for men! Then she waved her arm at me as if to banish the past.
“Never mind. I need you to find out for sure,” she said, snapping out of it.
I wasn’t sure who she meant by ‘you’ both Emi and I were in her line of sight, so I took a step to the left and Maisie’s head turned in my direction.
Damn it.
“How bad do you want him?” I wanted to know how serious she was. After the bank robbery fiasco I wasn’t ready to put myself in the line of fire again.
“I don't want him so much as I want my money. So, I got you a job there.”
“She's got a job,” Emi said, in my defense.
“Yeah, I said.
“You mean teaching?” Maisie smiled at the two of us like we were school children.
“Uh-huh”
“You'll like this better.”
“No -- I won’t,” I said.
“Dancing.” Then Maisie did a couple of sexy go-go dance moves!.
At the same time Emilia and I said, “No way!”
But Emi, the show off, started to gyrate her hips and do another type of funny little dance and sidled right up next Maisie.
“I can't dance,” I said to the two women.
“You can now.” Maisie insisted.
Emilia smirked.
Then she held up the tiny bit of outfit still dangling from the end of her sword.
“Magic G-string?” She announced, as if she knew all along. And maybe she did.
“That little bit of nuthin' is gonna make me a dancer?”
“Well, that might be pushing it, but it will get you the job. You'll audition in that.” Maisie said as if the whole thing was settled.
“And lose my teaching job if anyone recognizes me!”
“No one will notice.”
“Whitman will. He hangs at the Swan,” I informed her.
“Whitman? Your principal? I doubt that,” Emi said sarcastically.
“Yeah, he likes to go to the Swan for lunch these days. I think he'll notice.
Emilia nodded hard, suddenly agreeing with me. “He'll notice,” she repeated.
“He won't care. You know - you keep his secret - he'll keep yours. Try it on,” Maisie said.
I hesitated, mostly because there wasn’t much of ‘it’ to try on.
“There's a kimono on the back of the washroom door if you’re shy.” I didn’t move. I actually did want to try the outfit on. It glittered and I imagined it would look great on my curves, but I really didn’t want to put on a show for these ladies. Emi said it had magic, but if it did there couldn’t be much; the top was really only jewel pasties joined together by a silver thread and the bottom, well, it was a fancy cat’s cradle of string. I guess they mistook my hesitation for shyness. Maisie and Emilia gave each other a questioning look then Maisie said to Emi, “Suddenly she's a prude? Emilia shrugged out a ‘go-figure,’ then went back to her sword puppetry, using the costume as her prop. I slipped the outfit off the end of the sword and left to try it on
*
In the back room I headed straight for the closet washroom and closed the door and the lock. I didn’t want those two pulling any pranks. I heard them follow me back there. Maisie’s high heels clipped along the floor and Emi who usually only wore her practice slippers anywhere was probably right behind.
Then through the door Maisie started giving me orders, as if my trying on the dance costume was an acceptance of her assignment. “When you find this guy, be careful. Getting him here, to the shop, is going to take some skill.”
“You’ve seen what I can do,” I called out to her. It won’t be a problem for me.”
She was dead silent. Yeah, score one for Jane.
*
Inside the tiny washroom it was a real struggle to remove my clothes and even when I got them off and hung them on the hook on the back of the door, they seemed to fill the room. So I put the lid down on the toilet and stood up on it to get my costume on. It didn’t take but a few minutes to get the pasties in place and the g-string positioned. It was impossible to see what I looked like in the mirror over the sink which meant I was actually going to have to step outside and see how this all fired up. There was a kimono back there as Maisie promised, so I quickly slipped it on. While I did that I yelled out to Maisie, “You gonna add this guy at the Wild Swan to the deck then, if you think he’s so difficult?”
“Oh, definitely.”
“If he’s not a major –“
“Not yet, but he will be,” Maisie said, and she sounded very sure of herself.
“I'd like to see how that's done.” I said and I meant it.
“All in good time Jane.”
Chapter 7
Nine of Swords: Gangnam Style
I finally got the nerve to open the washroom door, but not without the kimono wrapped tightly around my near nakedness. I really wasn’t comfortable with the idea of showing anyone what this nearly nothing outfit looked like on me. I peeked out from behind the door and blew Emilia and Maisie a raspberry of exasperation. “This isn't going to happen.”
The two women exchanged concerned looks.
“Let's see. Come on outta there, will ya?” Emilia said. I stepped out but with the kimono pulled tight, which was very tight considering I was pretty much naked underneath. The strangest feeling came over me when I stood before them.
“I feel like dancing, like I feel all snaky and monkey,” I said. I liked the feeling. I began to wiggle and jiggle and did a little turn, which made me, want to do more. I looked over at Maisie and she gave me one of her wisdom smiles, like I was doing everything the way she wanted me to.
“Of course you feel like dancing,” she said.
Then it clicked. It had to be magic in the costume tha
t made me want to dance, but there wasn’t enough costume to hold the volumes of magic needed to give me any ability to dance. I’m pretty sure it was the power of suggestion, and the power of these two staring at me as if they expected me to turn into a butterfly, or something.
“Magic? Right. This costume is magical?” I needed reassurance.
“Didn't I say that already?” Emi said.
I still wore the kimono over the costume and I have to admit that I was pleased with the idea that Maisie made me a magic dance costume, even if it did look like two strings of Christmas lights wrapped around me. I suppose my pleasure showed because Maisie said, “Only the best for you, sweetie.” She snapped her fingers and something about the sound of that snap made me once again want to dance a little.
So I did.
I felt very sensual and attractive for some reason and deduced that it had to be something the G-string was doing to me. I played with the kimono and teased it into falling partially open. I unbelted it and did naughty things with the belt. Maisie and Emi nodded their heads as if to let me know I was making all the right moves. My dance became more intense and I toyed with the idea of letting the kimono drop to the floor. I heard strip tease dance music in my head and began to giggle like Marilyn Monroe. Emilia and Maisie exchanged looks of surprise. Maisie clapped her hands to urge me on. “Well done, Jane,” she said.
“Maisie, you're a-maisie-ing. I've got talent I've never possessed.” I was really getting into the sultry swing of the dance and feeling like a movie star when I decided I’d waltz into the next room, my kimono barely hanging from my shoulders.
“You underestimate yourself.” Maisie said as she quickly followed me to the front of the shop. Emilia hurried in too, not wanting to miss the show, or so I thought, until out of the blue Emilia began her taekwondo patterns around me. They looked a lot like dance moves and the next thing I know the two of us were doing a strange and weird dance number. At first I thought Emilia was trying to upstage me, but then I realized she was in the groove of the whole moment and so I went with it.
Imagine Madonna and a Jackie Chan doing a dance number together.