by Teisha Mott
“I don’t mind missing it, as long as I get my degree! I don’t have money to waste.”
Samantha looked at him, even more annoyed than before. He had no concept of what was important in life. And he was also a miser. “Everything in this world is not about money, Micah!”
“Well, of course it’s not,” Micah tried to joke. “Especially when you are Samantha Persaud, and you have a crap load of it!”
Samantha didn’t find any humour in his statement. “Go away, Micah!” She turned off the television.
“I was only joking! Why are you getting angry?” Micah tried to hug her but she pushed him off. “Remember your pressure!”
“My ‘pressure’ only kicks in when I am around tiresome people like you,” Samantha said. “I don’t want to be where you are right now. Please leave!”
Micah sighed. “You know what will cheer you up? A party!”
Samantha looked at him. “A party?”
“Yes!” He smiled. “There is this work thing Thursday night at The Hilton. I can take a plus one. I didn’t tell you about it before because I thought you wouldn’t be interested…”
“You thought right. I’m not!”
“C’mon, Sam,” Micah pleaded. “An evening out is probably just what you need. We don’t even have to stay long. The minute you start feeling tired or sick I will take you home.”
Still Samantha disagreed. “I’m on bed rest, Micah. Do you know what bed rest means? That means I am not to get out of my bed to do anything at all, and that includes going to a stupid party with you!”
Technically, she was sure it didn’t mean that. Since her last appointment, she had been restricted to the house -- upstairs, so she did not have to climb the stairs, but that was just Dr Creary being extra cautious. The truth was that she was not in the mood to dress up and go to a party. She was fat and gross and was now walking to the side like a crab. When she was leaving GynaeCentre last week with her mother, she heard a perfect stranger comment that she looked as though she could hardly make it. She had decided that she was not leaving the house again unless it was to go to Dr Creary. She certainly was not going to turn up at a party at The Hilton looking like the Titanic! With her recent luck, TATTLER would be there, waiting with his camera. The moment Caitlin came out, she was going on a diet, and not rest until she had retained her original size four figure. Hell, she would go down to a size two, and make Grandma Joyce happy.
“Alright,” Micah finally backed off. “So what are we going to do tomorrow night, then?”
“If you want to go to your party, don’t not go on account of me!”
“I don’t want to go without you.”
Samantha shrugged, obviously disinterested in doing anything with him. He sighed, not doing a good job of masking his frustration, and stood and gathered his things. “I’m going home then.”
Samantha nodded, and dodged the kiss he attempted to place on her cheek. He left, and Samantha wandered around her bedroom feeling more alone than ever. Her room had been drastically changed to make way for Caitlin’s things. The crib and changing table were set up. Her baby had a little dresser stocked with all sorts of adorable clothes and things. Her surroundings were ready for her arrival, but was her mother?
She took pause when she heard movement in Andie’s room. She was a bit stunned. It was just eight thirty, and since coming home, Andie had not made it home before midnight. She spent all her time with Nathan. Samantha recalled the previous year when she had come home from NYU for her graduation. She hadn’t spent that much time with Micah. She was far more interested in hanging out with Andie and Christopher and her parents.
She went through the bathroom and knocked on Andie’s door, then entered without waiting for a response. “Hi!” She smiled at her sister.
“Hey, Sammy!” Andie was changing into her robe, perhaps getting ready to take a shower. “I passed Micah’s car down the road. How comes he left so early?”
Samantha did not respond. “You had a nice time with Nate today?”
“Yes, I did!” Andie said, blushing. “He took me to lunch at Cuddyz then I hung out in his office for the rest of the day and watched him work. And look what he made me for my graduation present!” She held out a pink and blue scrapbook withANDIE AND NATHAN glued to the front letters cut from magazines.
Samantha took the scrapbook and flipped through. Nathan had created a memory book for Andie. It had photos of them over the past three years -- some posed, but mainly candid shots -- and a whole host of other mementos of their time together as a couple. It must have taken Nathan an awfully long time to put the memory book together, and clearly, he had created it with a lot of love. Samantha was impressed.
“That is really lovely, Andie!”
“It is, isn’t it? Andie nodded. “And all I could think to get him was a stupid digital camera! How much do I suck as a girlfriend?”
“Heaps!” Samantha confirmed, and Andie looked at her wide eyed.
“You are not supposed to agree with me! You are supposed to say a digital camera was a thoughtful gift, and I am a wonderful girlfriend!”
“Oh. That’s the game?” Samantha sat on her sister’s bed. “Then why you didn’t just say that from the beginning? You are a wonderful girlfriend, Andie. Nathan is going to haveso much fun playing with his brand new mass produced digital camera!”
“Thank you!”
Samantha was happy she was actually having a conversation with Andie. “So what you doing tomorrow night? You want to hang out?”
Andie shook her head. “I already told Nate we could go see a movie. We’re really trying to make the week count.”
“Oh.” She was disappointed.
“If you want we can hang out in the day,” Andie added for good measure. “I could stay in your room with you and play Scrabble.”
Samantha shrugged. “Don’t worry about it. I’ve wanted to knit another hat for Caitlin anyway...” She turned to leave her sister’s room, then stopped. “Andie, have you spoken to Jeremy recently?”
“No…” Andie said elusively. “But I had an e-mail from him this morning…”
“How is he?”
“Good. Just working really hard. He is working on a merger that has to be completed by January 1.”
“Is that the excuse he’s using for not calling me?”
“It’s not an excuse, it’s the truth,” Andie corrected. “He’s been working some sick hours these days. I hardly even see him anymore. And if you must know, he really misses you.”
“Coulda fooled me!” Samantha commented tartly.
“Don’t you miss him?”
“Of course I do!” Samantha exclaimed.
“Then why didn’t you just simply do what he asked and stay away from Micah? Is Micah’s friendship really worth losing Jeremy?”
“That’s not the point!” She willed herself not to start crying. “And in any event, Jeremy’s attitude proves that I really can’t depend on him. At least Micah is here.”
“Sam…”
“I need to go lie down for a bit, Andie. And you need to go take your shower.”
“My shower can wait if you need to talk...”
“No, I don’t need to talk. I just need to lie down. Goodnight!”
She lay on her back, trying to get comfortable and thought about Andie and Micah and Jeremy. She didn’t believe that Jeremy was not calling because he was busy. He had time to email Andie, but no time to email her? That was just unacceptable and childish. At least Micah was being manly and mature. She recalled then and there why she had initially decided not to date before twenty-five. Jeremy was proving not to be a mature twenty-three. Starting immediately, she was going to treat Micah better – be kinder to him and appreciate him more.
She grabbed the phone by her bed, and dialled his number. He picked up after one ring.
“Hey! Everything alright?” He answered.
“Everything’s fine!” She told him. “Guess what? I changed my mind about the par
ty. I’d really like to go.”
“Cool!” Micah sounded happy. “Cocktails are at seven. Can I pick you up quarter to?”
“Perfect!” Samantha adjusted herself as Caitlin stretched a bit. “See you tomorrow, then!”
“See you, Sam!” Micah replied.
She hung up the phone and smiled to herself. Andie didn’t have time for her and Jeremy had totally frozen her out, but in the final analysis, she still had Micah and Caitlin. Exactly how she was going to get past the hovering quartet of her mother, Nursey, Rosilda and Theresa in order to leave the house, she was not quite sure. Her mother would be easy. She was working late that week and was hardly home before eleven. It was going to be harder to dodge the other three. But she was enterprising. She would work something out. All she needed to do was to find an outfit that didn’t make her look like a ship, and everything would be just perfect.
***
“Here you are – a virgin piña colada with an extra pineapple wedge!”
Samantha took the drink from Micah. “Ooh! Thank you!” She bit into the pineapple slice, and smiled, enjoying the sweet, tarty taste. Micah was looking at her. “What?”
“Being pregnant has made you weird!”
“Why do you say that?”
“Because before, you swore you were allergic to pineapples, and now you look as though you want to be alone with that one little wedge!”
Samantha nodded. “Well, Caitlin seems to really like pineapples. More than pickles or chocolates. She’s moving now. You want to feel?”
“Sure!” Micah rested his hand on her belly, trying to feel for the baby. “There she goes!”
“And she got you really good!” Samantha commented. “That was a big one!”
Micah looked pleased. He was about to say something when he was interrupted by a booming voice behind him.
“Elliot! Nice to see that you made it!”
An older gentleman came up and slapped Micah on the shoulder.
“Evening, Mr Ross!” Micah greeted the gentleman and shook his hand. “This is quite a get together we have going on here!”
“Yes, it is!” Mr Ross agreed. “So, who have we here?” He motioned to Samantha.
“Samantha, this is Dennis Ross. He is a senior Economist here,” Micah introduced them. “Mr Ross, this is my – ahm – Samantha Persaud.”
“Ravi Persaud’s lovely granddaughter!” Mr Ross noted. “Pleasure to meet you, dear!”
“Same here!” Samantha said, smiling prettily. “I’m sorry I’m all over in pineapples.”
“That’s alright!” The older man smiled too. “You are also in full bloom. How far along are you – if you don’t mind me asking?”
“Thirty-five weeks,” Samantha told him.
“Wow!” Mr Ross was impressed. “So you can take in any time now. You should be at home with your feet up!”
“I know,” Samantha said. “But I’ve been at home with my feet up for weeks now. Besides, I wanted to come out with Micah tonight…”
“So in a few weeks you are going to be a papa!” Ross slapped Micah’s shoulder again. “Congratulations!”
“Thank you,” Micah said simply.
She looked at Micah, surprised. She wondered why he did not tell his colleague that her baby was not his.
“It is a very exciting time!” Mr Ross added. “Especially when it’s your first.”
Samantha did not know what to say. Micah looked uncomfortable. Fortunately, Mr Ross spotted someone else that he wanted to greet across the room. “There’s Hull from Treasury. He’s been dodging me all week. I’m going to see if I can catch up with him. Nice to meet you, Samantha. Please give your grandfather my regards. Take care, Elliot!’
Samantha waved as he went off.
“He seems nice,” she commented, as she finished her drink.
“He is,” Micah confirmed.
“How come you didn’t tell him you aren’t Caitlin’s father?”
“I really didn’t think we needed to get into that with him,” Micah responded shortly. “It’s getting stuffy in here. You want to go for a walk?”
Samantha smiled. A walk sounded like a wonderful idea. “Okay!”
“I’m happy I came out tonight, Micah,” Samantha told him, as they strolled by the Hilton Hotel’s poolside. The moon was out, and it was a really clear November evening. “It’s much better than being cooped up in my room.”
“I knew it would be!” Micah confirmed. “I’m glad we got to spend tonight together. I can’t wait for you to finish NYU and start working at BOJ. How great it will be when we are working together, just as we always planned!”
“Hmm…” Samantha commented. That was yet another thing she could not tell Micah. He loved to harp on and on about the day she would join him at BOJ. She did not want to work at BOJ anymore. That may have been her dream since she was fourteen, but now she had a different dream. She wanted to work at Persaud Financials. With Jeremy. All her thoughts were centred on the day when he would finish his two years in New York and come home. They would be friends again and then fall in love and get married and live happily ever after with Caitlin. They would be the cute couple with the cute baby and take turns picking her up from school, and she would stay in the Persaud Financials crèche! Samantha had it all figured out – a lovely story that played in her head every night. She missed him so much! If only he could stop being so angry at her…
“Are you alright?” Micah asked, noting that her face had suddenly become clouded and sad.
“I’m fine,” she said, trying to smile. “I was just thinking that Mr Ross said that Caitlin can come any day now. I really hope she stays at least two more weeks…”
“She will!” Micah promised. “And in any event, I am sure she will be fine.”
Samantha nodded. “I can’t believe this is happening. I mean, in the beginning, everything was going so well… Seems like it all started going to hell when Jeremy…” She paused. She almost said ‘it all went to hell when Jeremy left’. Micah always got annoyed when she mentioned Jeremy, and she couldn’t risk upsetting the one person she could depend on these days. She stole a glance at him, and wondered whether he noticed. If he did, it did not show on his face. “Anyway, I’m glad it’s almost over, and trust me -- Caitlin is not getting brothers or sisters!”
“You’re only saying that now,” Micah assured her. “Mothers always forget. Besides, being pregnant is a really good look for you!”
“What? Being fat and gross with huge ankles and having to pee every minute?” Samantha scoffed. “That’s a good look for me? My grandmother Joyce thinks I am ‘disgracefully huge’!”
“Well, she’s wrong!” Micah insisted. “I think you’ve never looked prettier. You are one of those beautiful pregnant women.”
“Well, Jeremy thought so!” She thought. She remembered the first moment she knew that she liked him. It was in her room… she had invited him in, and he had told her that she was beautiful; that he did not think it was possible that she could be more beautiful. She had thought he would have kissed her, but he hadn’t. He had waited until after that disastrous lunch with his parents… Micah was saying something. “What?”
“What do you think about getting together?”
“What do I think about who getting together?” She asked.
“Me and you, Samantha. What do you think about – you know – giving us another try?”
Samantha stopped walking. “That’s not funny, Micah!”
“I’m not laughing!” Micah said, seriously. “I knew I screwed up royally before, but we’ve spent the past couple months together, and this feels right. We feel right...” He took her hand in his. I would give anything to have another chance at being your boyfriend!”
She tugged her hand away. “Micah…”
“Look, I know you are sceptical, but I swear to you, it will not be like the last time. I will never do anything to hurt you again, and I certainly will not lose my mind and break up with you. This time is fo
rever, Sam. I mean it!”
Samantha was stunned almost into muteness. “Forever?”
“Yes, forever. Like in for the rest of our lives. I just want us to be in love again – get married, have a family, just like we always planned…”
“What about Caitlin?”
“What about Caitlin?”
“She isn’t your baby!”
“Well, she can be!” Micah countered. “I can adopt her…”
Samantha looked at him, and wondered if he was insane. “In which world do you think Jeremy is going to allow you to adopt his baby?”
“Well, I don’t care!” Micah insisted. “I can be as good a stepfather as anyone else. I looked at you tonight sitting there and I thought about how much I love you, and how good we were together, and I thought why aren’t we together…”
“We aren’t together because you broke up with me!” Samantha reminded him.
“That was a long time ago, Samantha. And I promise you that the situation with Ronica was just a fluke…”
“This isn’t about Ronica. Everything is different now.”
“I’m not different!” Micah insisted. “I am the same Micah who you fell in love with before. And I am here, baring all; asking you for another chance!”
Samantha looked at him, realising that Jeremy had not been as ridiculous as she had thought. He might have even been a little bit psychic. Micah may not have been calculating, but here he was, doing exactly what Jeremy knew he would – begging her to make up with him, and be his girlfriend once more. She recalled what she had told Jeremy – that unless she was in the situation, she would not know who she would choose. Well, here she was, and the choice was clear. Micah claimed he loved her, that he would never leave her again, and that he would be a great step father for Caitlin. They belonged together, he said. She could have back her perfect life – the one she had started planning when she first realised she liked Micah almost three years ago. They could start all over again, and this time, it would be forever.
But, at that moment, as they stood by the pool of The Hilton Hotel in New Kingston, a thought could not be less appealing. She did not want what they had. She wanted her family – Caitlin and Jeremy. She only wanted to be with Jeremy. She wondered why she hadn’t told him that in the first place.