Rodeo Regrets

by Shannon Taylor Vannatter

  “You can’t name a puppy quickly.” Caitlyn scratched the puppy’s ear again. “She’ll have to get to know him and see what fits.”

  “I better get out of here. Want me to take him until you get off work?”

  “No. This is my last stop for the day. If you’ll load his gear in my car, I’ll take him home. My car’s unlocked.”

  “You really should lock it up. We’re not in Aubrey anymore, Dorothy.” Lane turned away. “See you in the morning.”

  The door shut behind him and Natalie started breathing again.

  “He loves you.” Caitlyn’s sigh came out all mushy.

  “What?”

  “Why else would he get you a dog and build you a fence?”

  “He got me the puppy because he feels guilty for using me and dumping me in high school. The fence is to advertise his new business.”

  “I don’t think so. I think your long-ago high school romance stuck with him. What about you? Did it stick with you?”

  “No.” Her voice cracked. Drat.

  Caitlyn propped her hands on her hips. “Who are you trying to convince? Me or yourself? Sometimes you never get over your high school sweetheart.” Caitlyn’s gaze glazed over.

  Natalie knew exactly who was on her mind. “Do you ever think of Mitch?”

  Caitlyn paled. “No.”

  “You sure about that?”

  “Positive.” Caitlyn reached for the puppy. “So what are you going to name this little guy?”

  Her sister’s quick subject change spoke volumes. She wouldn’t mention running into Mitch—for now. Or that he’d asked about Caitlyn. Not yet. Obviously he’d never forgotten Caitlyn. And though she wouldn’t admit it, Caitlyn wasn’t over him.

  Natalie was trapped in the same high school time warp as her sister. She’d never gotten over Lane either.

  * * *

  Lane stepped up to the porch and knocked on the door. Rapid-fire puppy barks answered.

  “Hush now,” Natalie’s stern tone came through the wood. The door swung open.

  Natalie, in Western gear and bare feet, snuggled the puppy close.

  “You didn’t even ask who it was.”

  “I checked the peephole. Relax, we’re back in Aubrey, Toto.”

  Not a speck of makeup adorned her face. Beautiful. Even with tired, bleary-looking eyes.

  His heart stammered with memories of the last time he’d been here.

  But she was different now. And he’d accepted Christ months ago. So why did he want to pick her up and carry her to her bedroom? Why did past pleasures have to haunt him?

  Past sins. Sins he’d inflicted on her innocence.

  “He kept me awake most of the night, whining on the back porch. I gave in and brought him in and he still wouldn’t hush. I finally had to let him in my bed so I could sleep.”

  Why’d you have to mention your bed? He cleared his throat. “I should have warned you. He misses his mama.”

  “So much for not letting him in the house.” She rolled her eyes. “You’re early.”

  “I wanted to find out where you want the fence before you leave for work.”

  “Here.” She handed him the puppy. “Take him out before he has an accident. I’ll get some shoes on and be out in a minute.”

  The door closed in his face.

  He held the puppy up, eye to eye. “She’s fallen for you but obviously not for me. Can you help me out here?”

  The pup whimpered and Lane set him down in the wildflower-spattered grass by the porch.

  The door opened, and Natalie strode out. She scanned the trailer on his truck, piled high with fencing. “Isn’t that too much stuff?”

  “I’d rather have too much than too little. I hope you don’t mind vinyl instead of wood. No rot and no paint.”

  “Sounds perfect. You’ve been to the building supply already?”

  “No. I had this in my shop for my fence. But I don’t know when I’ll get it started, so might as well use it.”

  “Come around back.”

  He followed, glad to follow her anywhere. In the backyard, he focused on the porch surrounded by a deck.

  “I’m thinking a twenty-by-twenty enclosure straight out from the house about here.” She walked the imaginary line. “Around the porch and deck and back to the other side.”

  He scanned the yard. A barbed-wire fence ran across the back about thirty feet away from the house. “I could fence in your whole place.”

  “Forty acres?”

  “Sure.”

  “It’s already fenced and there’s no need to have a fancy new fence on all of it. Just the enclosure for the puppy will be fine.”

  “If I build a fence back here, no one will be able to see it for advertisement.”

  “True.” She tapped her chin with her index finger.

  “I could take the barbed wire down and rebuild with vinyl, then go ten feet or so out from each side of the house and up the sides, to where the back and sides would all be enclosed.” He pointed to the puppy. “This little guy will need some space when he grows up.”

  Natalie nibbled her lip. “Oh, all right. But not all the way to the barbed wire and don’t take it down. Daddy has longhorns in the pasture part of the time.” She checked her watch. “I’ve got to get ready for work.”

  Music began playing: “There’s Gonna Be a Heartache Tonight.” Natalie dug in her pocket and pulled out her cell. She frowned at the screen and pressed a button.

  “Hey, Wyatt, what’s going on?”

  Lane’s heart stilled.

  “Oh.” Her eyes lit up. “That’s wonderful. Of course I’ll be there. Oh, Wyatt, thank you so, so much.” She paused and turned her back to Lane. “I will. I’ll be on my best behavior.”

  A tremor moved through her as she ended the call and stuffed the phone back in her pocket.

  Lane set his hands gently on her shoulders and turned her to face him. “You get to see her.”

  Her chin trembled.

  “Steady. You’ll do fine.” He pulled her into his arms.

  She inhaled a shaky breath, her face pressed into his shoulder. “I’m not sure. What if I cry? What if I get all emotional and scare her? What if I don’t feel anything? What if I’m a horrible mother?”

  “When do you see her?”

  “Saturday.”

  “It’s only Tuesday. You’ve got all week to settle down—to prepare yourself. You’re already feeling something, which means you’re not a terrible mother.”

  “You have no idea.” She nodded against him, sucked in a deep breath and pushed away from him. “But I have to pull it together. For her sake.”

  Yep. A definite heartache tonight. His.

  She swiped her hand across her eyes. Her ringtone started up again. Her eyes went huge. “What if he changed his mind?”

  He settled his hands on her shoulders again. “I doubt it. See who it is.”

  Natalie dug the phone out again. A relieved sigh. “It’s Caitlyn.” She blew out a big breath and answered.

  “Why are you calling so early?” She paused. “Of course I’m up, but it’s really early for you to be up and lucid enough to call.” Her eyes lit up again. “That’s awesome! I knew it. I just knew it.” She pressed a hand to her heart. “Yes. Definite cause for supper. I have news, too. I’ll meet you at Moms on Main around six.”

  She hung up and slid the phone back into her pocket.

  “More good news?”

  “The best. Caitlyn officially got the clothing contract for Cowtown.”

  “That’s wonderful.” He opened his arms. “Celebratory hug?”

  Natalie cleared her throat and punched him in the shoulder. “I better finish getting ready for work. Where’s Rusty?”


  Another man? Lane’s heart crashed. “Rusty who?”

  “The puppy.” Her voice went up an octave as her gaze searched the yard. “Rusty, here boy.”

  His chest filled with air again. Lane caught a glimpse of the puppy behind a bush. “There he is. He’s fine.”

  She propped her hands on her hips. “Can I trust you to babysit him or should I pen him up on the back deck?”

  “He better get penned up since I’ll be concentrating on the fence. Go on and get ready. I’ll take care of him.”

  Her gaze narrowed. “I don’t want him getting in the road. I know it’s a ways from the house, but he might wander.”

  Lane scooped Rusty up. “Don’t worry. I’m penning him up right now.”

  She turned and headed back to the house.

  His arms had felt so good around her. So right.

  But Natalie didn’t even trust him with her puppy. How could he ever get her to trust him with her heart?

  * * *

  Natalie speared an avocado slice from her California salad at Moms on Main and popped it into her mouth. Smooth and creamy. The food always drew a crowd. People streamed in even on a Tuesday evening.

  “Thanks for helping me get the contract.” Caitlyn sipped her tea.

  “Your store had the goods. It just needed a little streamlining.”

  “I almost feel like I had an unfair advantage with my publicist-marketing-major sister.”

  “I worked with the other stores as closely as I did yours, but your store was the only one that already carried all the rodeo gear required. So you’re a pretty good marketer yourself.”

  “You’ve taught me so well, I’m beginning to see that every business needs its own special touch.” Caitlyn gestured to their surroundings.

  Natalie scanned the antiques lining the walls and shelves of Moms—everything from baby carriages to antique phones. An ambiance all its own. Just what every business needed.

  “So what’s your news?”

  Natalie swallowed hard. “Wyatt’s letting me see Hannah.”

  Caitlyn grabbed Natalie’s hand. “That’s awesome! When?”

  “Saturday. Quinn and Lacie are having some friends over for a trail ride. I’m supposed to be casual.” Natalie’s hand shook beneath Caitlyn’s.

  “Casual? Meaning?”

  “Meaning—I don’t tell her who I am. I’m just a friend along for the trail ride. I don’t grab her up and hug her.” Or blubber over her.

  A worried frown creased Caitlyn’s forehead. “Can you do that?”

  “I have to if I want to see her. Wyatt wants to take it slow.”

  “But not tell her who you are?”

  “Not yet. It was Star’s idea. That way it won’t be a big, jarring deal for her. Once I see her, spend time with her—it might be enough for me. I’m not sure I want or deserve a place in her life. She already has two parents.” Natalie’s voice cracked. “She doesn’t need me.”

  “Every little girl needs her mother.” Caitlyn nibbled her lip. “So what if you want more?”

  “We’ll see.”

  Caitlyn squeezed her hand. “I’m proud of you.”

  “For what? Giving up my daughter?”

  “Stop dissing yourself, Nat. It was the right thing for you to give Hannah up. It was best for her at the time. But since then, you’ve made a major turnaround. You’re a Christian now.” Caitlyn leaned toward her. “You may not realize it, but you’re like a different person. It’s as if the last ten years or so never happened. I got my sister back. And I really missed her.”

  “Me, too.” Natalie sighed. “Sorry I dropped out on you. And thanks for never giving up on me.”

  Caitlyn squeezed her hand again. “We better get busy on these salads.”

  “I’m not in any hurry to get home.”

  “Don’t you need to check on your puppy?”

  “I named him Rusty. But he’s not alone. Lane is there.”

  “You think he’s still working on the fence?”

  “I don’t know. But I don’t want to find out. I was thinking about hanging out somewhere else until it gets dark, just to make sure.”

  “Why do you want to avoid him?”

  Lots of reasons. “Brother Timothy said to avoid people who make me forget I’m a Christian.”

  “Do tell. How does Lane make you forget?”

  “He kissed me.” Natalie forked a large bite of salad into her mouth so she’d have no room to elaborate until she gauged Caitlyn’s reaction.

  Caitlyn smirked. “When?”

  “Before the rodeo Saturday night.” She rolled her eyes. “And I had decidedly un-Christian thoughts. But don’t get any ideas.” He only did it because I ran into this bronc rider I used to─ “This guy made a pass at me and Lane came to my rescue. He kissed me to convince the other cowboys we’re dating, so they’d leave me alone.”

  “You sure that’s all there was to it?”

  “Positive.” A knife twisted in her heart. “He pretty much told me so.”

  “Maybe that’s what he wants you to think because he’s not sure how you feel about him.”

  Natalie pressed her hands to her temples. “I don’t need any confusion right now. Or anyone who makes me think decidedly un-Christian thoughts. I’ve got enough of both without Lane Gray in my life.”

  Caitlyn’s gaze cut toward the door. “Speaking of your walking temptation.”

  “No.”

  “Yes. And he’s coming this way.”

  Chapter 8

  “Ladies.” Lane tipped his hat and noticed the tightening of Natalie’s mouth when she saw him.

  “Hey, Lane.” Caitlyn smiled. “Place your order and join us.”

  “I wouldn’t want to interrupt the celebrating.”

  “You won’t. You can help the celebrating. And Nat owes you a meal for that fence.”

  “If you’re sure?”

  Natalie looked anything but sure. But he couldn’t pass up the chance to spend time with her. “Be right back, then.”

  He scanned the menu, made his way through the fast-moving line and placed his order. Natalie kept her gaze down as he approached and slid into the booth beside her. Her sharp intake of breath was the only reaction he got.

  “I heard Cowtown’s rodeo queen is stepping down.” He turned to face her. “Will that mess up your campaign?”

  “Yeah, I heard. It’ll definitely put a kink in things.” Her sigh sounded frustrated. “They can’t seem to keep anyone, and I don’t understand why.”

  “Most single women want to keep Friday and Saturday nights open for dates.” Caitlyn shot her a grin.

  “Didn’t you and Caitlyn used to race barrels?” He set his hat on the table. “One of you should apply.”

  “From the looks of things—” Caitlyn’s gaze cut from Lane to Natalie “—Natalie might want to keep her Friday and Saturday nights open.”

  “I don’t think I could run a publicity campaign and serve as rodeo queen.” Natalie shot her sister a look. “Besides, I only dallied at barrels. You were the serious one. You should apply, Cait.”

  “It actually sounds like fun. I’ll think about it.” Caitlyn polished off her salad and yawned. “I’m beat. I think I’ll head on home if it’s all the same to y’all.”

  “Me, too.” Natalie squirmed, hinting at him to let her out.

  “You’ve barely touched your salad. Stay put, keep Lane company. Buy his dinner. After all, he worked on your fence today.”

  “No need for that. I already paid when I ordered. But I wouldn’t mind the company.”

  Caitlyn slung her purse over her shoulder and stood. “Y’all have fun.”

  Steam billowed off Natalie as Caitlyn hurried out the door.

&nb
sp; Would she ever enjoy being near him? His stomach took a dive.

  “So, did you finish the fence?” Her voice came out tight.

  “Just the posts. The concrete has to set. I kept hoping you’d get home to approve before I left, but I finally gave up.”

  “I’m sure it’s fine. I can’t complain about a fence built for free, now, can I?”

  “Once we finish the photo shoot tomorrow, I’ll be back to do the railing.”

  The waitress brought his Philly cheesesteak sandwich, the plate piled high with onion rings.

  “Thanks.” He bowed his head and said a quick prayer, then sank his teeth into the tender sandwich.

  Natalie stared at him.

  “What?”

  “You prayed.”

  “Yep.”

  “Caitlyn did, too. I guess I should do that before I eat now, huh?”

  “Natalie.” An older version of Natalie stopped beside their table. The man with her wore a father’s frown.

  Natalie’s face flamed. “Hi, Mama. Daddy.”

  “Who’s your friend?” The man’s voice was as tight as Natalie’s.

  “This is Lane Gray. We went to high school together. Lane, meet my parents—Daniel and Claire Wentworth.”

  “Nice to meet you both.” Lane reached to tip his hat, then remembered he’d shed it and Caitlyn had moved it into the seat beside her before she’d left.

  “Lane’s building a fence around my backyard, so Caitlyn suggested I buy him dinner. She joined us, but she left already.”

  “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Lane.” Natalie’s mom winked. “Y’all have fun.” Sure seemed like a gesture of approval. But her dad was another story. He walked away with a glower and cast suspicious glances in Lane’s direction as he moved through the line. After placing their orders, her parents sat in a booth directly across the aisle from him and Natalie.

  “If you don’t mind—” she drained her tea “—we’ve got an early photo shoot tomorrow and I can’t take the scrutiny a minute longer. Could you let me out, please?”

  Lane stood and stepped aside. “Another time, maybe?”

  She wouldn’t meet his gaze. “Thanks for the fence. I’m sure Rusty will appreciate it. Be sure and send me a bill for supplies when it’s done.”