“It’s pwetty.” Hannah squeezed her hand tight as they descended.
“Thanks. My cousin is an interior decorator.”
“What’s that?”
“Someone who makes houses pretty.”
“Hannah, we brought you to Natalie’s to tell you something.” Wyatt scooped the little girl into his arms. “You know how Caitlyn is your aunt and her parents are Grammy and Grand.”
“Uh-huh.” Hannah’s pigtails bounced as she nodded.
“That’s because Natalie is your mother.”
Hannah thought for a moment, then looked at Star. “That’s Mommy.”
“You’re right.” Wyatt’s tone remained patient. “Mommy is your mommy, but Natalie is your mother.”
Natalie’s eyes burned. She blinked. “Can I try?”
Wyatt nodded.
“Come sit by me.” Natalie sat on the bottom step and patted the seat beside her.
Wyatt set Hannah down on the step.
“When you were a baby, I couldn’t take care of you like I wanted to, so Daddy took you home from the hospital. He took care of you and when he married Star—she became your mommy.”
Hannah frowned. “Were you sick?”
Sin sick. “Sort of. But I’m better now. And I’d like to spend more time with you.”
“I live with Daddy.”
“Yes, sweetpea.” Wyatt knelt in front of Hannah. “You’ll always live with me and Mommy.”
“And you can visit me.” Natalie put her arm around Hannah’s slight shoulders. “And you can still call me Natalie, or whatever you want to call me. But Star is—” her voice cracked “—Mommy.”
“Would you like to stay here with Natalie for a while?” Star’s eyes were damp.
“Can I see the puppy?”
“Definitely. Let’s go see the puppy.” Natalie stood. “Maybe you can help me teach him not to jump on people. But before we do that, can I have a hug?”
Hannah hurled her little body into Natalie. Natalie scooped her up. Baby shampoo and innocence in a warm little bundle of love and acceptance.
If only adults were as resilient as children. To take what comes and not worry or dwell on it. Just go play with the puppy.
The puppy Lane had gotten her. To help her overcome her fear. Because he cared about her. He’d protected her from the leering cowboys because he cared about her.
And this morning, he’d cautioned her to be careful in her relationship with Wyatt. Because he cared about her. In light of her past, he had every right to worry about her intentions, but had she taken his warning wrong?
She needed to come clean with Lane. Test the waters and see if he felt the same way. Could they have a future together? Could he handle her truth?
“I love puppies.” Hannah squirmed out of the embrace.
Natalie set her daughter down. I love you. Maybe someday soon, she could say it out loud.
* * *
Lane parked his truck behind the Coliseum and opened the horse trailer gate. The big dun backed out steadily, as she’d done thousands of times. He patted her flank. “Good girl, Rowdy.”
If only he could handle female humans as well as he handled his horse. Seeing Natalie at the altar, at church on Sunday for both services and on Wednesday evening had been great—except that she was mad at him. And why shouldn’t she be? She’d thought he was accusing her of trying to bust up Wyatt’s marriage.
And only because he’d gotten jealous at their closeness and run off at the mouth.
He slipped Rowdy’s bridle and halter into place. Maybe he’d joined the church too soon. He loved the people there and felt like Brother Timothy needed him there. But maybe he needed to distance himself from Natalie. He’d been so sure they were meant to be, but after weeks of trying, he’d gotten nowhere with her.
After tonight’s rodeo, he shouldn’t have to work with her anymore. At least, tonight wasn’t one-on-one with her. He entered the Coliseum and led Rowdy to her stall.
Natalie was already there, talking with the camera crew. She laughed and joked as if all were right in her rodeo. If only he could be part of her rodeo. She saw him and grinned.
Huh? Wasn’t she mad at him? His heart flipped over. His jaw went slack.
She headed in his direction.
Surely she’d pass him. There was probably someone behind him she’d smiled at. Big oaf—at least close your mouth.
“Hey.” She stopped in front of him and stuffed her hands in her pockets. Almost shy. Was he in the Twilight Zone?
“Hey,” he said. “Look, I’m sorry about what I said at church.”
“It’s okay. Really.”
“No, it’s not. It’s none of my business.”
“You were trying to help me.” She lifted one shoulder. “The old Natalie would have stolen Wyatt from Star, gotten him to sign custody over, nabbed Hannah and dumped him. But I realize that’s not what you meant.”
“You do?”
“Wyatt and I never loved each other, so there are no feelings that might resurface.”
His insides warmed. She’d never loved Wyatt. He’d never loved her.
A rowdy crowd of cowboys sidestepped them, joking and laughing.
She waited until the noise died down and moved closer to him. “Wyatt let me tell Hannah who I am. She spent Sunday afternoon with me. And we set up a visitation schedule.”
Her nearness cut into his oxygen supply. “That’s great. I’m glad he’s doing the right thing. How did Hannah take the news?”
“Like a child.” She grinned. “She just wanted to play with the puppy you got me. Which got me to thinking.”
“You don’t want him?”
“No, I do. I was thinking how kind you’ve been to me since I came back to town.” Her gaze settled somewhere near his throat. “You’ve been very supportive. You tried to referee Wyatt and me when I first tried to see Hannah. You protected me from unwanted male attention. You got me a dog and built me a fence. Why did you do all that?”
“I hurt you once. I wanted to make up for it.” That’s how it started out, anyway.
“Is that all?”
I love you. Have since high school. “What are you getting at, Nat?”
“I’ve been having these feelings.” The corner of her bottom lip tucked under her teeth. “And I wondered if you had any.”
Was she saying what he thought she was saying? Or did his heart just hope? “Feelings for you?” He took a step closer to her.
Her gaze finally met his. She closed the gap between them and slid her arms around his neck.
His arms encircled her waist. He couldn’t breathe for a solid minute. “It’s more than this. For me, anyway. I hope it is for you, too.”
“What is it, then?”
“I definitely think we should spend more time together and figure it out.”
“Me, too.”
“Brother Timothy and Sister Joan’s anniversary party is Saturday. Still want to go? With me?”
“Definitely.”
“It’s a date. But right now, I gotta get my brain back in the arena.” His gaze locked on her lips. “And I can’t do that if you stick around.”
She pulled away from him.
But his arms weren’t ready to let go. He grabbed for her.
Natalie wagged a finger at him just out of his reach. “Uh-uh. I won’t take the blame for a rodeo accident. Get your head back in the game, cowboy.”
She turned away and left him standing there begging for more. A lifetime of more.
* * *
Natalie clutched Lane’s arm and hoped her panty hose wouldn’t slip any farther down. She scanned the Ever After Chapel reception room. The Holstein-spotted couch and gleaming tile floors set the tone for down-ho
me gatherings.
They’d traversed the reception line to congratulate the pastor and his wife, then mingled with friends and other church members.
Would this be her only visit here with Lane? She had to tell him the truth. Soon. Things were moving forward between them at breakneck speed.
“Did I tell you you’re beautiful?” he whispered near her ear.
And stole her breath. “A few times.”
An orchestra began playing fancy music. She didn’t recognize the song. Soft and lilting. Beautiful.
Her panty hose slipped down again. They’d been slipping with each step, but if she sat down, surely they’d stop. Thankfully, her dress came to the knee, but at the rate they were going...another step, another slip.
They were inside the reception room, and the panty hose were around her upper thighs now. Why had she worn the stupid things?
“Can we find our table?”
“You okay?”
“Fine. Um, I’ll stand over here, and when you find our names I’ll join you.”
He frowned. “You sure you’re okay?”
“My feet hurt.” Just can’t walk much more at the moment. Major wardrobe malfunction.
“I can imagine, in those shoes. You sure look hot, though.” He winked.
She shivered. And her hose slid down more. Please let their table be close.
Lane left her side and scanned the first row of tables. He moved to the second row, then motioned her over. She met him, keeping her thighs together as much as she could. Blasted slim hips and skinny legs couldn’t even keep a pair of panty hose up.
At least they were almost to the table.
He pulled her chair and she sank into it. Made it. Now she couldn’t get up until the whole thing was over. Then maybe she could make a bathroom run. “You don’t have to sit here with me. Go mingle.”
“I’d rather be with you than anybody else here.”
She leaned into his shoulder. “Ditto.”
“I wish they’d open the dance floor. I’m dying for a chance to dance with you.”
“Dancing?” Her panty hose definitely wouldn’t survive a dance.
“What’s wrong, don’t you like to dance?”
“I do. But I...”
“Hey, Natalie.” Kendra claimed the chair on her other side. “I finally finished taking pictures. Lane, can you go help Stetson and Clay move a few things back in place?”
“I’m on it.” He squeezed Natalie’s shoulder. “Be right back.”
“You two seem cozy.”
“For the first time in months, I’m having a hard time focusing on Lane.”
“Why?”
“From the time I got out of his truck, my panty hose have been making a steady decline. They’re just above my knees at the moment. Sadly, my dress isn’t much lower.”
Kendra giggled, then covered her mouth. “I’m sorry. I know it’s not really funny.”
“Actually it is, but I don’t know what to do. I’m afraid if I get up, they’ll be below my dress before I can make it to the bathroom.”
“Take them off under the table. The tablecloth is long. No one will know.”
“You think?”
“I’ll warn you if anyone heads in this direction.”
Natalie reached under the table. She slid her hose down quickly, then slipped her shoes off, pushed the left leg the rest of the way down with her right foot, and repeated the process with her free foot. She scooped up the loose hose with her toes, grabbed them and stuffed them in her purse. “Ah, much better.”
“Perfect timing. Here come the guys.” Kendra leaned near Natalie’s ear. “And the panty hose caper will be our little secret.”
Lane and Stetson joined them.
“Now that I’ve single-handedly solved the problems of the world, do you mind if we go now?” Kendra clutched Stetson’s hand.
“You okay, doll?”
“Just tired from hauling myself around.”
“Nothing to haul. You’re one fine pregnant lady.” Stetson helped her stand. “Our chariot awaits.”
“’Night, y’all.” Natalie waved them off.
“Miss Natalie, how are you?”
Natalie turned to see Brittany Miller behind her. “I’m fine. Sit with me. How are you?”
“Good.” Brittany perched in the chair beside her. “I broke up with Jeff and I’m dating a really nice guy from our youth group now.”
“That’s wonderful.”
“Thanks for your advice.” Brittany’s cheeks pinked and she lowered her voice. “I almost made a terrible mistake.”
“Glad I could help.”
“I better find my mom. I help out with small issues that pop up.” With a shy wave, Brittany left their table.
“Who is Brittany?” Lane asked.
“She was in the Sunday school class my mom taught. She was about six then. I ran into her at Quinn and Lacie’s wedding.” It seemed like a lifetime ago. “Her boyfriend was pressuring her. I rescued her and tried to talk her out of giving in to him.”
“I’m proud of you for helping her. For saving her from a jerk like I was once upon a time.”
“It was a long time ago. You were a kid.”
“A hormone with feet.”
She laughed. “That, too.”
Lane scanned the people milling about around them and pressed his lips near her ear. “What do you say we get out of here?”
She shivered. “Whenever you’re ready.”
He took her hand and led her outside.
* * *
Lane twined his fingers with hers and rounded the Ever After Chapel toward his truck. “I guess your feet recovered. You’re walking better.”
She bit her lip and sighed. Her face reddened. “This is so embarrassing. But my panty hose started slipping down the minute I got out of your truck.”
Lane chuckled. “So that’s why you squirmed around all night and could barely walk. That’s quite a predicament you got yourself into, little lady.”
“I’m glad you find my predicament funny. I guess I bought the wrong size.” She cracked a smile. “I’ve never worn the stupid things before.”
He chuckled again.
“I’m fine now. Kendra stood guard while I shimmied out of them under the table.”
“If that wasn’t so tantalizing an image, I’d laugh.” He tugged at his collar. “If it’s not something you usually wear, why did you?”
“I wanted to look...proper. For you.”
Something inside him warmed and he brushed a soft kiss on her lips. “You’re beautiful. And you look very proper. But you’re definitely making me have improper thoughts.”
A slight breeze stirred her hair. Her blue eyes glowed in the sunlight. It was increasingly hard to have proper thoughts about Natalie.
He stopped beside his truck but didn’t open the door for her yet.
“Don’t you need to get to the rodeo?”
“We’ve got a little time.” He pulled her close. “I wanted you to myself for a bit.”
“I’m not sure that’s such a good idea.” But she didn’t resist and laid her head against his chest.
“You know those feelings we were discussing the other day?”
She pulled away enough to look up at him.
He could drown in her blue eyes. “I think I figured them out. I love you.”
“Really?” Her eyes lit up and she did a little bounce in his arms. “I love you, too, Lane.”
“I loved you back in high school. That’s why I broke up with you. I was scared.”
“You broke my heart back then, because I loved you. I still do.”
“Oh, Natalie. So many wasted years.” He kissed her—fully staking
his claim, the way he’d wanted to for so long.
She moaned, cupping the back of his head with her hands as if she couldn’t get enough of him.
With every ounce of strength he had, he grabbed her wrists and pulled away.
“What?” Her huge eyes questioned.
“We’re going to do things right this time.”
“I was just kissing you. That’s all I wanted.” She rolled her eyes. “Well, not all I wanted. But that’s all I was going to do.”
“But if you keep kissing me like that, I’m not sure it’s all I’ll do. I’m not feeling very Christian at the moment.”
She took another step back. “You’re right. We need to keep our heads, and besides—I need to tell you something.”
“Me, too.” What would she think of his imagined call? Would she want to marry him? Would she accept being an associate pastor’s wife? Would she think he was crazy for entertaining the idea when she knew exactly what he’d been? “Let’s talk after the rodeo.”
“I’ll be waiting.” She kissed her palm and pressed it against his cheek. “I love you.”
A shudder moved through him. “And I love you.”
He opened the door and helped her into his truck.
Natalie Wentworth loved him. Thank You, Lord.
* * *
Nothing could dim the fire in Lane’s soul. Not the manure-scented arena. Not the occasional foul language that peppered the air. Not painful memories from the past. He saddled his horse with a song in his heart. Put there by Natalie.
“Heard the latest rumor around the arena?” Wyatt’s voice came from behind him.
“Don’t care to.”
“Me, neither, but it concerns you.”
Lane turned to face him. “Keep talking.”
“That you and Natalie are sleeping together.”
Okay, maybe he’d been wrong. His chest boiled over and he clenched his fists. “That’s none of your business. But no, we’re not. Natalie’s not like that anymore, and neither am I. For your information, I’ve only kissed her twice since high school. And that’s all I’ve done.”
“Simmer down, Gray.” Wyatt clapped him on the shoulder. “Just telling you what I heard. I’m glad it’s not true. But there’s definitely something between y’all.”
Rodeo Regrets Page 13