In the intervals between the acts Esther noticed that everyone carefully avoided speaking to her. They weren’t being unkind. It was the only thing to do in the circumstances and, as she’d already had three prompts, she knew that even the most unsophisticated member of the audience would be well aware of the fact that she wasn’t doing well.
As she staggered through to the end of the final act her spirits began to lift slightly. At least once it was over the nightmare would end for tonight, if not for the whole tour. She heard Noel as Alan say, ‘No, I don’t … understand,’ and knew that now she was coming to the quotation from Blake. She tried to remember what Christopher had told her and, at last, a little passion crept into her voice as, being careful to let it break dramatically now and again, she started to recite. She thought that it was going well, and that at least the audience would remember something good at the very end, but then disaster struck. As she came to the last two lines she got the end words of the lines transposed and, to her horror, heard herself saying, ‘And when this we rightly go safely through the world we know.’
The moment the words were uttered, Esther broke out in a sweat. She simply couldn’t believe that she could have done something so unprofessional. After that her mind went blank. Luckily there were only a few moments of the play left and for several of them Esther was positioned with her back to the audience looking out of the window, meant to be lost in her own reverie. In actual fact she was perilously close to tears, and at the very end of the play, when she had to turn towards her brother, Alan, while the lights dimmed around them until only a spotlight was left on the pair, her tremulous smile was not an act.
When she came off stage Esther felt as though she were in a waking nightmare – one which would never end. She was so distracted that if Damon hadn’t caught hold of her by the hand and pulled her back on stage she would even have forgotten to take her bow. She managed to smile prettily at the audience and the applause was tumultuous but she knew that none of it was for her. She’d been diabolical; there was no other word for it.
Finally, Christopher stepped forward from the line and spoke to the people at the front. As he began to thank them for their appreciation there was a spontaneous burst of applause that went on for at least a minute and he smiled modestly and charmingly with a humility that, to those who knew him, was probably the best performance he’d ever given. At last it was all over, and the audience trooped out into the night and the actors returned to the dressing room to remove their make-up and costumes and return to their everyday selves.
All around Esther people were congratulating one another: ‘Darling you were wonderful.’ ‘Terrific, the audience loved you.’ The words reverberated in her head non-stop but no one spoke to Esther. In a way she was grateful because she would hate to be given false compliments.
Forcing herself to enter into the spirit of the thing a little, she congratulated Rosie and Rebecca on their performances because they’d both done very well. Rosie smiled her thanks but didn’t offer false congratulations in return. Rebecca merely shrugged, as though Esther’s words were of no significance to her whatsoever.
As Esther was standing in her slip removing the very last vestiges of make-up with cold cream she saw in the mirror that Christopher was standing a couple of inches behind her and their eyes met in the glass. Christopher’s were cold.
‘What the hell was all that about?’ he asked angrily.
‘I’m really sorry,’ Esther said quietly. ‘I know I was dreadful and there’s just no excuse.’
‘Was it nerves? Did you panic or something?’ Christopher demanded.
‘I don’t know,’ persisted Esther. She couldn’t possibly tell him because she needed him to believe that she still desired him if she was to carry her plan through to fruition.
‘Well, don’t let it happen again,’ said Christopher. ‘I told all the reporters at the press night how wonderful you were going to be. You’ve made me Took a complete fool.’ At that he turned and walked angrily out of the room.
‘At least you saved him the trouble of doing it himself,’ said Damon quietly.
Esther glanced over her shoulder across the room to where Damon was sitting in front of his mirror. ‘What do you mean?’ she asked.
‘You know perfectly well what I mean. He can make a fool of himself at any time without help from you.’
Esther laughed nervously. ‘That’s not very kind and he was extremely good tonight.’
‘Sure, he was OK but he wasn’t exactly challenged, was he?’ said Damon.
‘You were good too,’ Esther added. ‘I think you were more powerful than you’ve been in rehearsals. Rebecca seemed quite taken aback.’
‘Did she?’ queried Damon. ‘I imagine it would take a lot to disturb Rebecca.’
‘She was still good,’ Esther murmured. ‘I thought everyone was good except me.’
‘You’ve got to put it behind you,’ said Damon. ‘It’s fatal to dwell on nights like this. We all have them, you know,’ he added more gently. ‘It’s probably your lack of stage experience showing. I expect it’ll be a completely different story next time. Maybe you’ll outshine us all.’
‘Right now I don’t care if there isn’t a next time,’ Esther exclaimed passionately. ‘I think perhaps I’m better off in television where you get a chance to do re-takes.’
Damon’s eyes narrowed. ‘Somehow I’ve never pictured you as a quitter, Esther,’ he remarked. ‘What you need is a drink and a quiet chat. I know there’s some kind of a party going on but I don’t imagine you feel like going, do you?’
‘I certainly don’t,’ she said.
‘Then let me take you into the village. There’s a really nice little restaurant where we can get something decent to eat, have a civilised glass of wine and talk about things.’ He saw the expression on Esther’s face. ‘Not the play,’ he promised her. ‘Other things.’
She was very touched by his kindness, especially since no one else in the cast had taken the trouble to say anything in the least sympathetic to her. ‘That sounds nice,’ she agreed.
‘I’ll meet you outside. We can easily walk, then it doesn’t matter how much we drink,’ said Damon.
Left alone, Esther hurried to dress. Suddenly she was, beginning to feel better. It was the first time that Damon had been in the least bit agreeable towards her and the prospect of an evening alone in his company was very attractive. She realised once again that it was Damon she really fancied. The trouble was, Damon wouldn’t make Marcus jealous. Their paths had simply never crossed and it wouldn’t matter in the least to Marcus if the pair of them were’ having an affair. Nevertheless, she knew instinctively that she was going to have an enjoyable evening and hoped that it would help take away the memory of the night before: a night that she couldn’t deny had been a valuable experience but not one she wished to repeat.
‘Where the hell’s she going?’ Christopher demanded as he saw Esther and Damon disappearing into the night.
‘To enrol at drama school?’ suggested Rebecca.
‘I suppose you think that’s funny,’ said Christopher.
‘It is quite,’ laughed Rebecca. ‘Mind you, I wasn’t the one praising her to the skies and making her sound like the next Vanessa Redgrave.’
‘I can’t think what was the matter with her,’ said Christopher. ‘I really did think she’d got to grips with that part, you know.’
‘Perhaps she didn’t get enough sleep last night,’ said Rebecca.
‘Well, if I have my way she won’t get a lot tonight,’ said Christopher with a smile. ‘I thought it would be fun to repeat the experience. In fact I’ve suggested to her that she should join us in our room. Not that I knew then that she’d be going out with Damon Dowden for the evening. God, she’s got appalling taste, first Marcus and then him.’
‘Why do you want her to join us again?’ queried Rebecca. ‘Aren’t I enough for you?’
Christopher ran a hand through her long dark hair. ‘Of cours
e you are,’ he reassured her. ‘It’s just that it’s so much more exciting when there are three. Maybe we could get Theresa to join us if Esther’s going to be late back. What do you think?’
‘You’re wasting your charm on me,’ Rebecca pointed out. ‘I know you’re an actor, remember? And since you ask, no I don’t want Theresa to join us. I’d like it to be just the two of us.’
Just then someone called Christopher’s name. ‘Look I’ve got to go to this damn party,’ said Christopher, irritably. ‘You know I promised them that I would. You’re coming, aren’t you?’
‘I’ll be along in a minute,’ said Rebecca, a weary tone to her voice.
‘I hope you’re not going to prove tiresome,’ said Christopher. ‘I hate it when women play games. I just haven’t got the time for it.’
Rebecca watched him go and bit on her lower lip. His charm was definitely losing its appeal for her and she was beginning to grow tired of his need to be dominated or be joined by another woman. It had been fun at first but she wanted him to start spending more time alone with her. She was still very keen to have plenty of experimental sex but didn’t see why they needed a third person for that. She could think of lots of things they could do on their own. She was also getting rather tired of pandering to his professional ego.
She knew that she could give a better performance than she had tonight but she was deliberately toning it down a little because she was due to play Lady Macbeth opposite his Macbeth the next night. Rebecca knew that if he thought for one moment that she was going to be too good he’d have replaced her without a second thought – probably with Ellie Ford.
As she wandered disconsolately in the darkness Rebecca suddenly bumped into Nicholas. ‘Are you going to the party?’ he asked her.
‘Yes, in a minute,’ confirmed Rebecca.
‘What’s the matter?’ asked Nick. ‘You sound a bit low.’
‘Tired I guess,’ said Rebecca.
‘You were absolutely brilliant, you know,’ enthused Nick. ‘I couldn’t take my eyes off you.’ He paused for a moment. ‘To tell you the truth I never can,’ he said in a low voice.
Rebecca took a step nearer to him. He’d already made his feelings for her plain, and once or twice during rehearsals in London they’d come very close to having an affair, but she’d always drawn back at the last moment because of Christopher. Now, suddenly, Nick was becoming more attractive to her and she moved her body so close to his that their hips were touching. ‘Isn’t there somewhere we could go?’ she suggested. ‘Somewhere quiet where we could be alone?’
‘Sure,’ said Nick. Then he stopped for a moment.
‘Aren’t you going to the party? It’s back at The Small House.’
‘I promised Chris I’d meet him there later on but I’m not his exclusive property, you know,’ said Rebecca.
‘I didn’t imagine you were,’ said Nick, ‘but I can’t afford to upset him at the moment. None of us can, come to that.’
‘It doesn’t matter. How could he find out?’ asked Rebecca. ‘Neither of us are going to tell him, are we?’
‘Of course not,’ Nick laughed.
‘Where shall we go then?’ asked Rebecca.
Nicholas thought for a moment. ‘I know. If we go along the gravel path by the west side of the house there’s a secluded spot near the wall with a long bench where we can sit. No one goes there; it doesn’t lead anywhere.’
‘Sounds perfect,’ said Rebecca.
Nicholas took her by the hand and as they walked together round the building she felt his thumb caressing the inside of her palm. Even before they reached the seat they began kissing, and Rebecca found his firm strong grip and demanding mouth very arousing. It was also nice to be the object of such adoration because when she was with Christopher she was always aware that the person Christopher most admired was himself.
As they reached the seat, Nicholas’s hands found the gap between Rebecca’s black palazzo pants and silver lurex top. Sliding them upwards he made a sound of appreciation as he realised that she had nothing on underneath. Immediately his hands started to caress her breasts. ‘You’re wasted on him,’ he muttered thickly, his mouth close to Rebecca’s ear.
Privately Rebecca was beginning to agree but she didn’t respond because she was trying to concentrate solely on the sensations. Nick was less gentle than Christopher but there was no doubting his enthusiasm and within a few seconds he was easing Rebecca back on to the bench until she felt the ivy that clung to the walls of the west wing of the building tickling her hair.
The night was cool but her body felt hot and she made no protest when Nick started to remove the lurex top. When the air hit her hot flesh she felt her nipples grow instantly erect and uttered a tiny cry of delight as Nick’s tongue started a slow descent from the base of her neck down between her breasts. At the same time his hands were on her hips, tugging at the palazzo pants and forcing them downwards until they finally fell around her ankles. Rebecca quickly kicked off her shoes and then managed to remove the trousers as well so that she was lying sprawled in a semi-reclining position, her upper body totally nude and with only the protection of her flimsy, pink silk bikini pants to protect her from the night.
Nick was also sprawled on the seat but he was positioned above her with one hand taking his weight at the base of the back of the seat and the other insidiously working its way through her pubic hair. In the distance Rebecca could hear the sounds of people chattering and laughing and this added to her excitement.
She felt Nicholas’s fingers wandering through her dark pubic hair. Suddenly he pulled lightly on a few strands and when she jerked in response he laughed softly before repeating the procedure several times. To Rebecca’s surprise this had the effect of bringing her very near to the point of orgasm and, as her body gathered itself together, she let out a soft sigh of contentment. Immediately Nick stopped what he was doing and instead knelt down on the path, leaving her feeling momentarily very exposed.
Then his hands were parting her knees and she felt them on her inner thighs but, instead of stroking them, he used his nails to scratch very gently at this highly sensitive area. Rebecca’s hands reached down and she tried to pull his head upwards so that he would use his mouth on her but he refused to do what she wanted. Instead he gently drew a piece of skin at the top of her left thigh into his mouth and then with great deliberation closed his teeth on it.
The result was an increase in desire that had her moving more and more restlessly on the seat. He then resumed his gentle scratching, only this time he allowed his hands to wander over the crotch of her panties until he located her swelling clitoris beneath the material and rubbed it very lightly.
Rebecca knew that the silk panties were becoming very damp. She could feel them sticking to her, moulding themselves to every nook and cranny. As he started to use his tongue on the material, her flesh beneath swelled rapidly and she thought that she had never been so desperate to come. Her sex was hot and throbbing and when he carefully grazed her clit through the panties with his teeth Rebecca’s body spasmed as it prepared for orgasm again.
Once more, Nicholas changed position, easing himself back up on to the seat so that he could pull Rebecca’s upper body against his chest and allow her to stimulate her nipples against his jumper. His right hand pulled her panties to one side and then, at last, he straddled her upper thighs and she felt his thick penis moving up and down the moist channel of her inner lips. She thought then that she was finally going to orgasm but, for some reason, her body let her down and she realised she desperately wanted him inside her; wanted to be taken for a change instead of having to be in charge, as was so often the case with Christopher.
‘I want you inside me,’ she gasped to Nicholas as his glans continued to slide up and down her sex, slowing in pace when it was near the shaft of the clitoris.
‘Are you sure?’ he asked, teasing her.
‘Yes! Yes!’ she shouted, quite forgetting that they were out of doors and that
her well-trained voice would carry easily on the night air.
‘All right, then,’ said Nicholas and suddenly he thrust into her with such force that her body was slammed back against the seat. She gasped aloud, and he seemed to be lost in his own world as he pumped furiously, his hips moving faster and faster while his hands gripped her round her upper body, his nails digging into her flesh.
She was amazed at how well he filled her, and also delighted at how long he was able to continue thrusting. At last the fire that he had kindled was allowed to take light and spread. Rebecca’s whole body came alive before the sensations drew inwards, centring in that one vital spot set behind her clitoris. She was so excited now that she couldn’t control herself and, reaching round him she tried to slide a hand down the back of his jeans, which he hadn’t bothered to remove, in order to stimulate him, but he moved his body slightly so that she had to draw her hand back again.
‘I’m in charge tonight,’ he reminded her.
‘Yes! OK!’ gasped Rebecca, hoping that her body hadn’t lost its rhythm. She needn’t have worried because Nicholas now proceeded to launch an erotic onslaught on almost every part of her body using mouth, lips, tongue, teeth, hands and fingers while all the time he continued to thrust fiercely. At last Rebecca felt her belly tighten, and her internal muscles quake, and then she exploded into orgasm with a scream of delight that sounded more like a wild animal than a human being. The moment she’d come Nick came too, still thrusting fiercely into her and calling her name over and over again as his body spasmed and the veins on his neck stood out like whipcords.
When he finally withdrew, Nick helped Rebecca to dress and then pulled her roughly against him. ‘Wasn’t that great?’ he asked.
‘Terrific,’ Rebecca agreed breathlessly.
‘Are you sure you’ve got to go to that party?’ asked Nick.
Rebecca thought for a moment. ‘I suppose so,’ she conceded. ‘I don’t want to, but like you said we really can’t take any chances with Christopher right now. The tour’s only just beginning.’
Dramatic Affairs Page 17