“Yes dear, but I just don’t understand how she could traumatize her career like that! We need you Raelyn. I need you! I need you to do this show for me, for the shop. It’ll only be a few hours...”
“I guess...” Raelyn sighed.
“Oh thank you dear! Be here at 8 am sharp for makeup and hair! Okay! Ciao!” Stella was instantly gone, whisking herself back into her office probably to complain to Darla for forgetting.
Anyway, Raelyn didn’t care. She now had to get home, shower, and get dinner and then go to bed early so she could get back to work the next morning well rested for a show she really didn’t want to do.
The drive was a bit of a ride. She had worked nearly an hour from home and the roads were increasingly getting worse since winter was coming, but her pickup took them easily.
Arriving back home at nearly 6 pm already, Raelyn stumbled out of her truck and toward the house.
“Hey, Rae!” Cole called. He should have been on his way back to wherever he seemed to drift off to on specific days of the week, but he had stayed for some reason.
“Cole.” She nodded. “What’s up?”
“I had to wait until you came back... You really need to give me permission to work on the house before the storm comes in. The roof looks like it’s getting pretty bad.”
“No. I think there are plenty of other things that need to be worked on first. Like the cabin of yours... I know it needed a few upgrades including a roof on that. So...”
“Rae...” He sighed. They had drifted a lot since that night and he felt sorry for that, but emotionally he couldn’t do it. He needed to have all of her or none. His heart would burst with any other options.
“No. I’m the boss here. It’s my home.” Raelyn said firmly, then stomped off toward the house. She reached the kitchen without a stop and yanked out the biggest bottle of wine she could find and gulped some down. She had yet to eat so soon the effects would sink in hard, but she didn’t care. She needed something! Stella had been working her like a mad woman ever since she had started weeks ago. And now! NOW!!! Cole was bothering her with fixing the roof! She didn’t have the heart to tell him she couldn’t afford the roof right now. Instead, she was almost thinking of selling the place. Maybe she could find a more reasonable house with less work and no need for a helper.”
But she had been regretting that thinking. She wanted Cole around as much as she wouldn’t admit it. She likes the guy. Raelyn drank and drank until her legs began to wobble.
Cole irritated with himself for his lack of manliness, wondered around he slammed his fist into the side of the barn and it had begun to swell. The buzz of his pager rang in his pocket. “Shit,” he swore. Quickly, he pulled his cell out and dialed as he rushed toward his truck.
Raelyn watched out the window as a semi angry looking Cole rushed away. She had caused that! Tears slipped from her eyes and she drank more.
She laid down on the couch and cried herself to sleep.
Chapter 13
“Jameson! Suit up, we got our hands full tonight!”
Cole kicked off his boots and pulled up his overalls. He had arrived just in time as a second round of men were getting ready to fight the blazing inferno before them.
Cole put on his helmet and ran toward a man struggling to get back to the truck. He patted him on the back and squeezed the man’s shoulder. “Come on let’s get you outa' here.”
I don’t know what happened. I just looked outside and there were trees burnin’. I tried to get the hose first but...” the man whimpered as he looked out to the field of grains a blazin’.
“Its alright, at least it’s just your field. Forest fires tend to claim everything in their paths. Hey... sit here I’ve got to get out there.” Cole sat the man down and ran back toward the blaze to help others with the hoses.
The blaze burned for hours and Cole was exhausted by the time it was fully out. He was covered in soot from head to toe, he groaned.
Thankfully one of the other men volunteered to work the night so he was now headed back. As he was arriving, Cole sighed realizing he now had no good shower. He had yet to set up the shower in the cabin. He would have to ask Rae...
But Cole’s plans were squandered as he pulled up to the house. He slammed on the breaks and looked toward the house. Raelyn was on the porch crying as a man stood before her screaming. She seemed to be fighting back yet when the man raised his hand to her Cole lost it.
He ran forward and tackled the man just as his palm came in contact with Rae’s face.
“Ooph,” the man oozed out air as he hit the ground. “What the hell man?”
“Don’t you dare ever hit that woman again!” Cole growled standing up and walking toward Raelyn. She held her cheek and stared at him wild-eyed.
“Are you alright Rae?”
“Who the fuck is this Rae?” the man snapped from the ground.
Raelyn whimpered and looked at Cole with tear filled eyes. “Get him out of here Cole...” she begged.
Cole dug a phone from his pocket as he stood the man up by his shirt collar. “You heard the woman...” Cole glared at the man as he walked him toward the vehicle he had obviously arrived in.
“You have no right being here.” the man snapped.
Cole stopped and shoved the man toward the car. “I’ve got more right than you. And if I ever see you here again you will be sorry.” Cole sneered.
The man climbed into his car and yelled, “you’ll be sorry Rae!”
Cole slammed the door before walking back toward a tear stricken Raelyn. He collapsed his arms around her and kissed the top of her head. “Shhh...” he cooed.
As the car left the drive, Rae pushed herself up on her toes and kissed him. That lead to Cole wrapping her tighter in his grasp and the two tangling together as they shoved into the house.
“Soot...?” she pulled away questioningly.
“We’ll take a shower.” Cole smiled.
The two had spent time in the shower washing each other and soon had headed off to the bedroom. Cole didn’t ask what had happened with the man at the door... It could be left for a later time.
“I’ve missed you.” Raelyn yawned as she drifted off to sleep.
Cole kissed her softly, “Missed you too.”
As Raelyn drifted off in his arms, Cole remembered the picture of her he had snagged as she sat at the table a few days prior. He had showed it happily to the men at the station and laughed and smiled proudly when they oooed and awed at her. There was a picnic coming up and he was going to ask her to attend it with him. He was surer now than he had ever been. To have a woman again... was an amazing feeling.
Chapter 14
Oh, how those words hurt a few weeks later as Raelyn glared at him from across the table. “I’m sorry,” Cole grumbled. “Really I’ll clean it up...”
“No. Just get out!” She screamed. The alcohol had worn well past off and Raelyn was back to her cold shouldered self.
Raelyn had allowed him into her home for a few nights and Cole grew accustomed to it as he began cooking up a storm for her. This particular morning he had the dishes from cooking breakfast spewed all over. Vegetable remains chopped on the counters and the trash can full.
“Why are you so cold when you’re not wasted?!” Cole growled back, instantly regretting it.
“Excuse me?!” She hissed.
“Nevermind.” Cole rolled his eyes and turned away. He was more annoyed than normal today since he had been up all night working and then came back to make a delicious breakfast for Rae before she headed off to another photo shoot, which she didn’t want to do. He wanted to ask her something... but now not so much.
“No, no nevermind! Why are you so all into my pants when I’m drunk! Don’t you have any restraint yourself!”
Her mood had drastically changed. She was more cold shouldered and distant than normal the last few days and he had enough. “You know what... I’ll clean it up and then I’m gone.” Cole snarled. “I’ve got an opportu
nity and I am just going to take it.”
“What?” Rae questioned.
“You heard me Raelyn, I’m leaving.”
“No... You can’t Cole! What about...” tears sprung to her eyes and she dropped to a nearby chair.
“I can’t do this anymore Rae. I want you, but you are so cold sometimes! You won’t tell me anything about your life. You don’t want to let me in... I’m through.”
Cole finished up the remaining dishes, cleaned up his vegetable scraps, and then took out the trash. Once he was finished he went to the cabin and gathered his things. He hadn’t really been allowed to bring anything over to Rae’s room, so the house was free of his things. Instead, he filled up the back of his truck with his clothes and the few items which meant anything to him.
It was painful leaving Rae’s property. He had been here now for a few months and the seasons had changed a bit into a beautiful scenery sprawling around him. He would miss taking Raelyn’s dogs around fixing the fences with him and riding her beautiful dapple gray horse. Maybe he’d look into getting a puppy...
Once down the drive he picked up his cell and dialed the woman he really didn’t want to speak to but knew he didn’t have a choice. “Hey, hello Yuna.”
On the other end of the phone Yuna Guines, Cole’s family friend, almost like a second mother to him, breathed through her nose as she tried her best not to scream at the stubborn man on the other end.
“So. I’m sorry Yuna.” Cole sighed.
“Oh, no dear, Raelyn has always been a difficult woman. You know the perfect one for you. You are a difficult man with a hard life. Did you even tell her what you do for a living?”
“No Yuna, why would I do that? She doesn’t want to know. She is just too concerned about herself.”
“Are you sure about that? I have known Raelyn for many many years. I know what she had gone through though it is none of my business to tell you about it. I think you should sit down with that woman and have the heart to heart before you lose that chance.”
“I can’t Yuna. I just can’t do it. Not with the anniversary coming up.”
“I understand dear. Why don’t you go out to my house on the beach? It’s nice out there right now. The water is still warm and the sun is still shining bright.”
Cole sighed, “Maybe another time. Do you mind if I come stay? I really don’t want to go back to the station full time.”
“Yes, of course, my boy.”
He hung up the phone and headed toward the station. Today he would go to work like any other but tonight, he would be heading back to Yuna’s home instead of Raelyn’s.
Chapter 15
The weeks passed and there was no sign of Cole. Merilee questioned, but soon those questions were hard to put off.
“You can’t be serious Rae!” Merilee screeched on the other end of the phone when Raelyn finally told her what she had done.
“I am...” Raelyn mumbled. She now regretted her decision to yell at Cole but what was she to do? He had been so nice to her, even went so far as to cook breakfast for her before he even got to sleep from whatever the job was he did at night. She could tell he was exhausted and that fueled her flame. He shouldn’t care that much for her! She regretted every bit, she wished she could call him.
“No wonder you’ve been looking like you’ve lost weight! Rae that man has kept you sane for quite a bit now! His food put some healthy weight on you! What are you going to do if Richard comes back? Huh?” Merilee’s voice was laced with sympathy and concern.
“I know Meri, I know! I screwed up and now it’s over and done with. I can’t change anything,” tears dripped from her eyes.
“Oh, sweetie...” Merilee consoled.
“Anyway... I think I’m going to put the house up for sale. I don’t need this much of a place anyway. I don’t have time for it nor can I care for it on my own.” Raelyn sighed. Her decision wasn’t an easy one, but it was for the best. She had to rid Richard from her life, starting with the house.
“Oh.”
“Would you help me pack?”
“Well, of course! When are you moving? Did you find a place already?” Merilee questioned.
“Yeah... kinda, I got a realtor for this place and I found something cute closer to the city... there is a nice guest house out back which I can rent out and a pool for tannin’.”
“Oh, I bet I can find a few people to rent too!”
“Great! We’ll talk later... I’ve gotta get going...” Raelyn sighed. She would rather chat all day with her friend than go to where she was headed.
When that time of the month had come and gone... well... there was nothing. Not a drop. She knew what the answer had to be but now she had to go in and be sure.
“Miss Shepherd.” The nurse called as she stood at the waiting room door. There hadn’t been anyone else here today and Raelyn wasn’t sure if she was overjoyed by that or a little extra nervous. Either way, she drifted into her own little world.
“Miss Shepherd!” the woman called again. This time, Raelyn sprung out of her daze and hopped up.
“Yes... right here.” Raelyn went to the woman who’s stern look bothered her.
“Yes, you are. Now... let’s take your weight.” The woman pointed toward an older model scale and as Raelyn stepped up she began moving the little weights around on it.
“Oh, my aren’t you a feather. We’ll have to get your weight up...”
Raelyn frowned. She didn’t want to eat, let alone did she really want to weigh more. “Okay this way,” the woman pointed and began walking away. She directed Rae into a room with dim lighting which the woman amped higher and the horrid smell of antiseptics and bleach. It was more than obvious the cleaner went overboard last night. “Please take and put this on and the doctor will be with you shortly.”
She didn’t want to wear the stupid gown. She didn’t want to be here either! Damn it Raelyn! Damn it! What if she was...
She waited for what seemed like forever then went through the rhythmic procedures and then waited again for what seemed like even longer.
There was a knock and Raelyn sat up slightly a bit higher in the chair she was now sitting in, thanking the stars that she was now dressed. “Well Miss Shepherd, I guess we’ll be seeing you back in a few weeks. It’s too early to tell what you are having but...”
Tears slid from Raelyn’s eyes and the nurse paused her speal. “Miss are you alright? This wasn’t a planned...”
Raelyn shook her head fiercely. “No.”
“Oh... I’m sure you’re husband will be thrilled as much as you.” The woman passed off some papers to Rae and had her sign on the dotted lines before rushing Rae out to the receptionist. Why were people so weird!? It was obvious Raelyn wasn’t necessarily happy about the current situation but...
Slowly she dragged herself to the car, then to the pharmacy. “Oh congratulations Ma’am.” The pharmacist beamed. He passed her the bag containing what Raelyn guessed was horse sized pre-natal pills.
“Thanks.” she mumbled.
Chapter 16
Raelyn felt awful, she had gone to bed feeling a bit nauseous and woke up early to throw up. If this was what it was going to be like... she wasn’t sure she wanted to have any more after this. She had yet to tell Merilee and was yet to phone her mother either.
Today... was that day. The day the world would collapse around her. She had survived nearly two months on the prenatal pills being hidden in her purse and the nausea being kept under wraps but not anymore. Stella was beginning to get suspicious.
She dressed herself and made her way to work. “Morning Stella,” Raelyn called as she passed her boss.
“Morning!” the woman chirped.
Her desk seemed to be getting smaller and her life seemed to be getting messier. Rae grumbled to herself as she squished her growing behind into a chair. She pulled herself up to the computer and realized then at that very moment... that she couldn’t hide from Stella anymore. She couldn’t reach the computer desk th
e same as she could. Not with the growing ball of a stomach.
Raelyn groggily went on about her work, filling in forms here and filling things there. When the time for lunch came she went out, just so it didn’t look suspicious when she struggled to eat. Yes, she struggled to eat anything with any bit of healthiness to it. Well... except for strawberries. She couldn’t get enough strawberries.
Lunch break was way too short for her taste. As Raelyn made it back to her desk she could hear Stella’s voice and she cringed.
“Oh!” Stella screeched from her office as Raelyn heard footsteps racing her way. She pulled her sweater around herself a bit more and sat up as straight as she could trying to hide herself. “Rae! I need you tomorrow! Darla! She’s letting me down! Please Rae!” the woman whined.
“I don’t think I can do it, Stella. I’m sorry...”
“What do you mean,” the woman scolded. It wasn’t really a question, but a pissed off response instead. Yes, Raelyn had never let her down before but now...
“I’m sorry Stella, but I can’t... I have plans this weekend...” She mumbled.
“Oh well, darling just cancel them,” Stella said with a shrug as she turned and began walking away.
“Uh, Stella... I can’t.”
“Oh, but darling... you must. Or well... I’ll be finding someone to replace you and not just for the modeling part.”
Tears threatened to spill and Rae knew she was getting horrible at keeping her emotions in check, but she didn’t care. “Yes, ma’am.” She muttered.
“Thanks. I knew I could count on you. I’m off for today. See you tomorrow! Tootles!” Stella chippered her way out of the office.
“Crap,” Raelyn grumbled to herself. She couldn’t do it. There was no way she wouldn’t show in the skimpy stuff that Darla had to dress her in.
The rest of the day passed in agony and Raelyn soon pressed her energy into other more important things, like... names.
As the clock struck four, she was off. She wasn’t about to wait around for any longer. She had to drive to her mother’s house by tomorrow morning. Merilee was going to be there for lunch along with Raelyn’s mother, father, and two brothers. Her bags had already been packed, she was thankful for that as she raced out to her car.
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