by Elaine White
But he'd also be crazy to go off with a total stranger. If it hadn't been for the nurse knowing who Austin was, Sterling and Fearghas knowing who he was with, then he might have had second thoughts. As it was, he and Sterling had those tracking apps on their phone; if his friend ever got worried about him, he could use it to find Harrison no problem. Though he doubted it would ever come to that.
“Great. So, I never thought about this when I asked, but are you okay on my bike?” he wondered, glancing at it with second thoughts.
“It's fine.” He nodded, unable to help but smile. “I'm a total geek, but by cousin runs a garage and owns a Harley, so I've been on a bike before,” he promised, crossing his heart to emphasise the fact that he would actually be okay and survive a two minute ride on a motorbike.
Austin grinned and grabbed the helmet to hand over. “Best that you wear this, since you're the young impressionable one,” he claimed, with just enough teasing that he chose not to retaliate.
Since Austin stood there, waiting for him to take the helmet, Harrison climbed onto the bike and sat as far back as possible, before taking it from his hand. He wanted to get on first so that Austin didn't notice the shift of his added weight if he got on the bike after him. This way was less embarrassing, should he notice how heavy Harrison was or comment on it from surprise.
So far, Austin had been sweet and hadn't mentioned anything about Harrison's rotund belly, short, flabby arms and thick legs. He wanted to keep it that way.
It only took a moment to strap the helmet on and wait for Austin to climb on. He was big and broad, not exactly a skinny, model-like figure, so Harrison pressed his hands to the centre of where he was sitting to keep himself as far back as possible. Once his driver was in place, he slid against his back as carefully as he could, wrapping both arms around his waist.
Purely to hold on, of course.
“Give me a minute,” he shouted to be heard through the helmet, since he'd gone and put the visor down. With a little shuffle, he drew the second strap of his bag over his shoulder until it was squarely against his back, properly secured. “Okay. I'm good.”
Austin nodded and laughed, or at least he thought he did, then a gentle thrum under his thighs said that he'd turned the engine on. A louder, more growling sound emerged as the bike went into reverse and backed out of the space.
Harrison loved the throbbing base beat between his thighs as the machine took off in a steady, smooth flow of motion. He clutched onto Austin's waist tight, having to lean forward to rest his head against the back of his shoulder, since he couldn't see much from this angle anyway, without leaning too far and upsetting the balance of the bike. The problem was his round stomach, protruding forward so much that he couldn't quite get back to chest with the strangely charming stranger he'd met.
It had been an exhilarating ride, but Austin had been so polite and gentlemanly that it had taken Harrison off guard when they finally arrived at his house. Austin helped him off the bike, said 'thanks' again and goodbye, then watched until Harrison was inside the house. With a last wave out the front window, he'd thought that would be the last he saw of the older boy.
Then he showed up, out of the blue, back where he'd started. Harrison couldn't tell if it was coincidence or intentional that he walked into the park to find Austin sitting on the bench he usually occupied. The bench he'd vacated just before Austin came flying over the top of it a week ago.
“Are you...here to see me?” Harrison asked, despite knowing better. He just couldn't stop himself. It couldn't possibly be a coincidence. Not the way Austin was calmly sitting there, reading a book, with no other belongings in sight. Not when it was the exact same day of the week, the same lunch break, and the same place as the last time they met.
With a smile, Austin chuckled and closed his book, standing to tuck it into the back pocket of his jeans. “I thought I'd take a punt that you'd come back,” he said, making it quite clear that Harrison wasn't hallucinating this.
He wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not.
“So, um...why?”
Offering up a shrug that said, literally, nothing in response, it took Austin a minute of scrubbing the back of his head before he spoke up. “To be honest, I'm kind of lonely and I thought maybe you might want to hang out sometime,” he said, phrasing it so much like a question that Harrison almost slapped himself for how soft he was.
Instead, he finally crossed to the bench, sat down and dropped his bag at his feet. It took a minute to get out his paperback, the Tupperware box of lunch he'd packed that morning, and zip it back up again. He always carried two forks, in case he had another accident-prone moment and broke one of the plastic utensils, so he handed one to Austin, who raised an eyebrow, and cracked open the tub.
“Crab salad, with a lemon dressing,” Harrison explained, unable to hide the smile that twitched on his lips. He couldn't help it. Austin's silent confusion was kind of adorable. “You don't appear to have any food...or anything...with you, and I refuse to be the only one eating. So if you want to hang out with me, you need to eat – unless you're allergic! – and you have to give me ten minutes of quiet to finish my homework before we can talk like regular strangers,” he bargained.
After all, it was far better to have company, even quietly, than to be alone. He normally guarded his alone-time with a ferocity Karsyn teased him for, but if Austin really was lonely, he couldn't turn him away.
“You are the strangest guy I've ever met,” Austin remarked, while stabbing his fork into the open box of crab salad and taking a bite. He watched Harrison the entire time, as he lay the box between their bodies and popped open his paperback.
“Thank you.” Whether it was meant as a compliment or not, Harrison had never been one to shy away from the facts of his life. He was a geek, a loner, a total nerd; short, fat, with a compromised immune system, and he was weird. Why deny it?
Owning who he was had come at the price of his treatment. Maybe he'd always be remembered, or thought about, as the kid who had cancer, but at least he knew who he was and lived his life true to himself. That was better than any fakery high school might have tried to box him into, any day of the week.
By the time Harrison had completed his mandatory reading of his latest English assignment, he tucked his books away and turned to Austin, pleased to see that they'd inadvertently split his lunch in half, each leaving just enough for the other.
Pulling out the packet of chocolate covered raisins he'd been saving for study period, he tipped out a handful and offered them up.
Austin laughed and shook his head, even as he accepted them. “I haven't had these since I was a kid,” he admitted, popping one into his mouth only to pause, as though to check they were still the same.
“Have you recovered from the raging ball of fur incident, yet?” Harrison asked, unable to resist the teasing.
Almost choking on the raisin, Austin swallowed then shook his head in amusement. “You're a dick,” he muttered good-naturedly, before having a little chuckle to himself. “But, yeah. I haven't seen the little ragamuffin since,” he confessed, without even the slightest hint of being nervous, back in the area where he'd last encountered it.
“Good.” Harrison was pretty sure something would have been done about it, by now. This wasn't an area where even well behaved dogs were allowed off leash, so he figured the Neighbourhood Watch looky-loos would have been on the case quickly. “You're not terrified of all dogs, though, are you?” he asked, intrigued to find out if he'd been scarred for life, or if he'd already had an aversion to dogs before the incident.
Austin sighed and stared out across the park. “Nah. I love pets, especially dogs. I just think there are some people who don't deserve them,” he said, a hint of something in his tone suggesting he'd seen the good and bad of dog owners. “I work in the animal shelter over the summer, so I've seen some of the evil shit they do to dogs. Not just the ones that buy them as Christmas presents, without the first clue about how to take car
e of them, but the ones who really mess them up. The dogs forced to fight, the ones neglected so badly that they come in only to be put down.”
He stopped there, just as Harrison was about to speak up, and shook if off. “You seem like a dog person,” Austin remarked out of nowhere.
“I do?” Harrison wasn't sure what that meant, but he took it as a compliment. “Well, I am. We've had dogs my entire life, both my parents grew up with dogs since they were little. It's kind of a family tradition,” he confessed, reaching into his bag to grab his phone. He switched it on and brought up the photo gallery, pausing only a second to hesitate, wondering if it was too 'proud parent' before going through with it.
Turning the screen, he showed off a photo of his own dog. “This is Noodles,” he announced proudly, watching Austin raise an eyebrow at his name before taking the phone and enlarging the photo. “He's a Standard Poodle, so kind of big. But, I have allergies to just about every pet in existence that has fur, so he's one of the few safe options. I couldn't live without him,” he confessed, knowing he'd go nuts without his Noodles.
His parents had cringed when he named the dog Noodles, but he'd been straight out of his treatment at eleven and thought it was cute. There was no changing it once Noodles got used to it.
“I have an aunt who is allergic to dogs. It's weird that you're allergic to all animal fur, though, isn't it?” Austin asked, a faint crinkle of his brow signalling the beginning of the end. It was time to explain, and no quick 'all allergies are weird' would cover it. Besides, he didn't want to lie.
Harrison eyed Austin out the corner of his eye as he explained, wondering what his words would do to their potential friendship. “I had cancer when I was a kid. The treatment left me with a lot of side effects. Supervillain sized allergies was just one of them,” he said, keeping his tone calm and easy, just as it had been until now.
Austin didn't flinch or cringe away, he merely hummed. “Weird.”
“Is it?”
Turning to flash a soft, understanding smile, Austin's hair caught a glint of the sun and seemed to make his eyes sparkle. “I was diagnosed with Hodgkin's four years ago,” he revealed, shocking Harrison right down to his beaten up sneakers. “I had six months of chemo, got off lucky because we caught it early, and here I am.” He shrugged as though it was no big deal, but that certainly wasn't how he felt.
How often did he meet another cancer survivor who was his age, knew what chemo was like and actually wanted to hang out with him?
“That's oversimplifying it a little, isn't it?” Harrison objected, pretty sure that there was more involved than Diagnosis, Treatment and Survival. It had definitely been so much more than that for him. Then again, he'd battled for two years before winning the fight, so that part might have everything to do with how casually Austin shrugged it off.
“Probably,” he allowed, reaching up to rub his chin. “Thing is, I'm so sick of explaining it. I actually dropped out of school because people wouldn't leave me alone; hounding me with questions every minute of the day, talking about how I'd shaved my hair right down, that I'd put on weight, then when I lost weight. It was a pain in the ass and I decided I didn't have to deal with it anymore,” he explained, glancing over to flash a brief smile. “I ditched and went to college instead. Got my qualifications and moved on to study Literature and Art.”
A smile crept onto Harrison's lips and he nodded. “God, I can't believe I'm going to say this but...” shaking his head, he licked his lips and met Austin's big blue eyes, “thank you! You've just said everything that I could never put into words when I was little. I was only ten, and kids are way more curious than teenagers, so you can imagine what it was like. I took two years out and had to go back to repeat them, so all my friends now are two years younger than me. But, you know what?” he asked.
Austin shook his head, looking amused but also happy.
“The friends I have now are way more loyal and mean more to me than all the friends I lost when I left school. Maybe it's the age difference,” he admitted, since that probably had a lot to do with it, “but I lost most of my friends when I was twelve. Then I moved and met Sterling, Fearghas and the boys. Being a geek was cool to them and the fact that I was older helped, because I could buy things they couldn't,” he confessed, laughing as he thought of all the comic books he'd bought that were for 'young adults'.
Thinking about it now, he'd been about fourteen when he bought them, which was the minimum age, yet he'd been sharing them with his twelve year old friends within minutes of leaving the shop.
“You love them,” Austin said, as if that was any surprise.
Harrison nodded, because he would never deny that. “God, yes. Every crazy one of them. They've been with me through all the ups and downs. Through a second cancer scare when I was fifteen, which turned out to be nothing huge; through all the after effects, the weight gain, the frustration and...just, everything.”
Taking a breath, he knew that he'd never have made it without his friends. They were the glue that held him together. His rock to lean on, a shoulder to cry on.
“Yeah,” Austin sounded sad as he popped another raisin into his mouth and gazed off into the distance. “That's what I miss. Having someone to talk to. To just hang out with, without being the kid who had cancer.”
It was everything Harrison had felt, before moving here, before finding Karsyn and Sterling and Kenichi. It made him realise that not everyone liked being alone. And if Austin really didn't have any friends left, Harrison was going to be that for him. It was the least he could do for a kindred spirit who had lost his way.
Chapter 5
Two Weeks Later
“You really don't play any video games?” Austin asked, as they lounged in his living room after school, his hand lazily rubbing Noodles ears.
“Nope. Not my thing,” Harrison replied, without fear of coming across weird or the wrong kind of geek. “I'm more a book guy. Besides, I didn't peg you as a gamer.” He hadn't thought Austin liked all those RPG gaming things, but he might have been wrong. He'd learned over the last two weeks that Austin wasn't who he appeared.
Strong on the outside, marshmallow on the inside; quiet on the outside, but an animated hoot when they were alone; moody and broody to look at, but genuinely contemplative inside that big brain of his.
It had been so nice to get to know him properly. They'd shared nothing from their time as sick, cancer kids, but talked a lot about school, which teachers were still there, who had moved on and what scandals there had been since Austin left two years ago. He'd been eighteen at the time, making him twenty now, but that didn't seem to put any kind of wall between them.
Austin was a man, even though there weren't that many years between them. The fact that he was tall, buff and totally hot might have made him seem older, and it didn't help that Harrison was short and fat, making him look younger with his puffy cheeks. Regardless, the guy seemed to like him and he wasn't going to deny that he liked him back.
There had been some subtle flirting over the last two weeks, as they got to know one another better, but Harrison was too scared to do anything about it. Too nervous to think that Austin's attention really was romantic, and not just some strange teasing or after-effect of being alone for so long and then finding someone who made him comfortable.
They both sat in silence for a moment, each rubbing one of Noodles ears, their fingers occasionally brushing each other's, without either of them mentioning it. This was the third time Austin had been over, but the first time he'd been past the front door. Every time they met up after school, Austin drove him home on his motorbike and made sure he got inside, then left with only a wave or a quick shout of goodbye.
Today, he'd actually accepted Harrison's invitation inside. The fact that his mum was home, cooking up a storm in the kitchen, didn't seem to faze him at all. “Did you get that new book I recommended?” he asked.
“Oh, yeah. It was really good. As creepy and weird as you said, but also real
ly good,” Austin replied, his voice sounding a little distant for no reason he could think of. “It, eh, was nice to finally see them moving the relationship along a bit. It felt like it was never going to happen, in the first book,” he admitted quietly.
Unable to help but smile, Harrison wondered if they were talking about their relationship or the one in the book. “Well, I guess it made more sense that way. I mean, the main character had been alone for a really, really long time and the guy he fancied was the enemy. How was he supposed to reconcile that, when the world was in shambles?” he asked, reasoning out the whole thing the way he'd grown used to doing.
If there was one thing they really clicked on, it was literature. They read the same books, had the same taste and both loved dissecting them for the hidden meanings or messages, then debating whether the author meant them to be there or not. The answer was usually not and they'd end up laughing about the really stupid messages and the sexy as sin innuendoes they'd noticed.
Right now, Austin was too busy watching Noodles to pay attention, and as nervous as he was about messing this up, Harrison wasn't sure he could wait any longer to find out what was really happening here. Was it flirting? Was it friendship? Was it friendship leading to something more eventually?
It was so hard to tell.
“I actually read this really cute story the other day, that made me think of you,” Austin said out of nowhere, glancing up to flash a quick cheeky smile. “It was a young adult, with this main character who was just brimming over with snark. I mean, it was literally dripping off the page,” he confessed with a chuckle.
Harrison flushed at the implications, but couldn't find anything to say. He really had been full of snark and a little bit rude when they first met. It hadn't been intentional, but it had all happened so suddenly. “Well, you were acting like a complete moron that day we met,” he said, offering a little more snark to keep Austin happy and a little bit of the truth. Trying to sit up and touch his head wound that day had been stupid.