Marie sighed. "You know that's not what I want. I do want them to be happy."
Steven chuckled. "Well, let's be honest, my dear. You've wanted to assess their skill sets and set them on a path you believed would make them happy and control every step along the way."
"I have control issues. This should not surprise you. Melodie dodged my control every step of the way. I've never known how to help her. In the past, though, Evelyn and I were on the same wavelength. But, I don't know how to help her now, and that scares me."
"Talk to her. Better yet, try really listening."
"I'll try it your way—this time."
Evelyn hurried from the closet in order to have this discussion out of earshot of the boys. She made her way to the kitchen to brew some coffee.
"Evelyn, I was just coming to speak with you."
"I'm listening." She fought to keep the hurt out of her voice. She would give her mother the courtesy of listening even though Marie hadn't extended the same to her.
"I'm sorry."
This was new. She couldn't remember her mother ever apologizing…for anything. "About?"
"Walking out on you earlier. Avoidance is not my style, but your admissions took me by surprise. I was at a loss for what to say. I don't enjoy that position."
I bet she doesn't. "I didn't need you to say anything except you loved me and everything would work out. A hug wouldn't have hurt, either."
A moment later, her mother's arms encircled her body. "I do love you. I have no idea how everything is going to work out, but I'm confident you'll figure it out."
She allowed herself a moment to enjoy the rare display of affection from her mother before Marie pulled away. Brief yet a start. "I'm not sure I can…figure it all out. One hug and an apology can't fix all that's wrong with our relationship."
Marie narrowed her eyes. Now that was the mother she knew and loved. A small smile emerged on her face. "Takes a while for a leopard to change her spots, especially an old set-in-her-ways leopard. I'm trying, Evelyn. Believe it or not, I happen to be a flesh and blood human who makes mistakes from time to time."
Evelyn noted she didn't admit to failure. You had to recognize progress, however. "Prove you're trying harder. Make some of your amazing coffee, and really listen to my problems this time. I do have a strategy for solving the work crisis, but I'll need your help to make it work. I'm going to put the boys to bed, and then we can brainstorm. Her mother's talents were better suited to help with the professional problems, anyway. Maybe now the dialogue had been started, they could deal with their personal issues more appropriately in the near future.
Marie nodded. "As long as all these changes in your life don't mean you've started adding cream in your coffee. I'll go on record now. I won't stand for that."
Evelyn offered her a small smile. "Duly noted, and no worries. I still take my coffee black. I'll be back in a few after I get the boys tucked in.
She put Jason down first in Mel's old room and then ushered Michael into her room. There would be no sleep for her tonight, so he might as well get use of the bed.
"Mom? Where did Cody go?"
The ache in her heart reverberated throughout her upper body. She knew she'd have to explain everything to the boys but hadn't planned on doing so tonight. No more pretending. "I asked him to leave."
"Why? I know I'm not an adult and all, but it's not hard to see he cares about you. Jason and I really like him, too. If you asked him to leave because of us, you didn't have to."
Fresh tears filled her eyes and spilled down her cheeks. "It wasn't because of you, I promise."
"I'm not stupid. I know things were bad between you and dad. But Cody isn't like that. He would never hurt you."
She shook her head and pulled him into a hug. "You're right. He wouldn't. I didn't want to hurt him, that's why I let him go."
"How could you hurt him? Don't you love him?"
She hugged her son a little tighter, unsure how to find the words to explain. "I do love him, and I'm glad to hear you and Jason are cool with him. Can you give me some time to work all of this out?"
Michael pulled out of the hug and reached for a Kleenex on the nightstand to hand to her. "Cody says to always treat girls like ladies, so I'm going to give you until our first scheduled debate. You better come prepared, or I'll place the first check in my win column, and the ice cream is your treat."
Evelyn smiled as she brushed the bangs out of his eyes. "Don't you worry. I may be down, but I'm not out." She kissed him on the forehead. "I love you and appreciate your understanding."
She closed the door and leaned against the wall. Though her entire body hurt and the fragments of the life she knew lay shattered at her feet, she found a sliver of solace in her statement to Michael. She was down but not out.
CHAPTER FORTY-ONE
One week later
Evelyn watched her sons riding their bikes around the lake. Despite the season, the bright sun warmed the fall air and reflected like diamonds off the water. She inhaled deeply, running her fingers through the grass not covered by the blanket they'd spread out for their picnic dinner. She'd made the mistake of letting the boys choose what food would be present for the occasion. The mass of fried chicken, mashed potatoes, and gravy rested solidly in the center of her stomach. Despite being totally unhealthy, the comfort food had been a good choice.
A butterfly with black wings and bright colorful spots lighted on the edge of the blanket. Rare this time of year. She thought about the life of a butterfly, how hard it had to work to become the beautiful creature it was meant to be.
In that moment, she realized she needed to finish her transformation just as the butterfly did each spring. Everything she believed about herself, her life, and her dreams had ended in disaster. The cocoon of her failures had wrapped around her so tightly, she'd almost suffocated in the threads of disappointment. But life had gone on. All of her worst fears had come true, yet here she was—in the park, with her sons, about to embark on a new phase of her life. There was only one thing missing. Cody.
The butterflies in her stomach fluttered at the thought of her handsome soldier. She missed him terribly but planned on trying to repay his kindness to her in the next few days. Only time would tell if he would allow her to do even that. She would try, and if she failed, she'd learned life would still go on.
CHAPTER FORTY-TWO
Cody couldn't believe he was doing this. A promise was a promise, though, and he never backed out on his promises. He followed the crowd of people into the aquatic center. He checked his watch. Three-thirty, fifteen minutes before the swim meet started. A quick glance around revealed the viewing area Michael had told him about when they spoke last night. After the swim meet, he'd head back to Wisconsin and serve out the rest of his time at the recruitment center. Oh, and run the dairy farm with his sister. Somehow, he'd manage doing that too. Janice needed him, and he wouldn't let her down…not again.
At least he didn't have to worry about seeing Evelyn today. The swim meet started hours before she'd be off work. He hoped all those files and folders kept her warm at night in her golden years. Trudging up the concrete steps to the chosen spot, Cody selected a seat and waited for everything to get started.
Fifteen minutes later, the seats were filling with more spectators. Not bad attendance for a school swim meet during the workweek. He turned his focus from the crowd to the starting area, scouring for a sign of Michael. Someone sat next to him, but he didn't look. He'd promised the young man he'd sit in the assigned seat and wait for a wave. The kid was counting on him to wave back. He didn't want to disappoint every member of the Alexander/Walters household.
"He's right there next to the coach, in the blue swim cap."
He inhaled sharply. Even if the voice didn't give her away, her subtle yet familiar scent would. The lump in his throat made it hard to speak. He didn't think he'd ever see her again. "I didn't think you would be here. What are you doing here?" He didn't mean for it to sound like s
he had no right to be there, but she'd surprised him.
"Pretty sure the kid in the blue cap you're waving at is my son."
The waving finished, Cody turned his attention to Evelyn. "What about your job? Staying at the top of the totem pole and all?"
The pained expression on her face tore at the very fabric of his heart. "I know that's been my practice, but I've been working hard to make changes in my life. I meant what I said to you that night at the party."
He rubbed the curls on his head vigorously. "I don't know what to say, Ev. I miss you like crazy, and it's taken everything I have to respect your wishes and stay away. I wouldn't have come today if Michael hadn't argued his position so clearly. Hell, he reminds me a lot of you. He's going to be right at the top of the totem pole with you if he keeps that up."
She smiled, and she radiated pride. "He's been honing his debate skills. Though he's not interested in being at the top of the totem pole unless it means being a judge. I appreciate your coming today. It means a lot to him, to me."
They watched as the first heat began. Michael was scheduled to swim in the next one, if he remembered correctly. Cody tried to focus on the swimmers, but instead, he covertly watched Evelyn. There was something different about her. Subtle yet undeniably a change. The dark circles under her eyes had faded some, and the worry lines were softened by the smile she maintained. He could still see the laser-like focus in her gaze. He was happy about that as he'd always liked her focus, especially when it was on him. The buzzer interrupted his moment, startling him. He may never get used to loud noises, especially not one this close.
He turned his focus to Michael slicing through the water, every move efficient. "He's good."
"Yes, he is. Takes after his father. I'm more of a sun baby than water baby."
Damn it all. She effortlessly sucked him right back in again. Taking him back to the first time he laid eyes on her beautiful body sunbathing in India. "You can swim too. I remember our races."
"Touché, but his father really is a good swimmer." Her blush warmed the coldness in his heart since she'd ended things between them. "I only beat you at swimming because I distracted you."
Michael made the turn and started the return leg of the race, still in the lead. "Go, Michael! Bring it home buddy!"
Cody's loud cheer drew a few smiling glances and reddened the blush on Evelyn's face. He was going to miss those porcelain features. Thankfully, he still had his sketch of her. It wouldn't compare to the flesh and blood woman sitting next to him but would need to be enough. He wanted to be with her, but she'd made her position clear. And as she mentioned, he was a man of his word and would respect her wishes even if he didn't like or agree with them.
Seconds later, Michael touched the side and won his heat. Cody couldn't have been more proud if he were his own son. "He did great! He has a few more races, right?"
Evelyn nodded. "Yes, he's the anchor leg in the individual medley relay."
Cody nodded. "If he's the anchor, they're sure to win."
Almost two hours later, he stood with Evelyn, waiting for Michael to emerge from the locker room. The urge to reach out for her hand required entirely too much energy to fight for much longer. Sitting next to her and not being able to touch her had been equal parts heaven and hell and exhausting.
A moment later, Michael appeared. "Hey Cody! Mom? You made it to my meet?"
Evelyn hugged her son. "I did. I promise to try and make all of them in the future."
"But, your job…"
"You are more important. Don't worry about my job right now. I'm so proud of you."
"Thanks, Mom. Hey, maybe the three of us can go out for ice cream to celebrate?" Michael looked expectantly between the two adults.
"Hey, sport, great job today." Cody bristled slightly at Nathan's appearance. The guy wasn't high on his favorite people list.
"Thanks, Dad. Why is Monique with you?"
Nathan looked from Monique to Evelyn to Cody and finally back to his son. "I'd like to explain. Maybe Mom will let me treat to ice cream this time?"
Evelyn glanced at Cody and then to Michael. "It's up to you."
"Okay, I guess." The young boy gave Cody a forlorn look. "Maybe we can hang out later?"
Cody knew he had to go back to Wisconsin after the weekend, but he didn't want to disappoint Michael either. Truth be told, he might need another male to talk to after his dad brought him up to speed about Monique. Learning his Dad was living with another woman would be tough. Cody wasn't sure how much Nathan would reveal, but Michael was a smart kid and would probably figure everything out.
"If it's okay with your mom, we'll work something out before I head up to Wisconsin."
Michael gave his mom a please let me hang out with him look before turning to his dad. "Okay, let's go."
The trio left, and Cody was left alone with Evelyn.
"Thanks for coming today and for agreeing to see him before you have to leave."
He shrugged. What could he say? He really liked her kids and could picture them being a big happy family. Yeah, that wouldn't go over well. Besides, nothing had changed between him and Evelyn. "I told you before that even if things didn't work out between us, I'd still play uncle to the boys. I don't have any other nephews."
"I appreciate that, but…"
"But what?"
"I'd like to go over something with you. A project I've been working on. Would you meet me at this address tomorrow at ten?" She handed him a piece of paper. The caress of her soft fingers as they brushed against his made him long to be able to touch her again.
His curiosity plagued him. She'd asked, and he knew, despite everything, he couldn't leave without at least hearing her out. He owed her that much, and truth be told, he wanted to see her again. "Tomorrow at ten it is."
CHAPTER FORTY-THREE
Evelyn checked one last time to make sure everything was in order. Her guests arrived at nine thirty, and she'd seated them in the area that would be the conference room in the very near future. Coffee and pastries from Einstein Bros. Bagels, a local favorite, had been served. She'd reviewed her plan with them, and they were on board. The only one missing in this grand plan of hers—Cody.
At five minutes 'til ten, she stepped outside to wait. Four minutes later, her breath caught in her lungs, centering around her heart as he pulled into the lot. She prayed she would find the right words. He'd believed in her from the very beginning, and it was important to her to show him his faith had not been misplaced. She watched as he stepped out of the car, forcing herself to stand still and not run to greet him. No, she would stand here, smile as he approached, and then hope for the best.
"Hi, I'm here as requested. What is this place?"
"My new office." She dropped the news and then waited.
"Wait. What?"
The confusion on his face melted her heart even more. Being in his presence tended to reduce her to a messy puddle of emotion, either from desire or despair. She gripped the material of her skirt with her fingers to keep from reaching out to caress the strong line of his jaw. "I quit the firm last week."
"What do you mean you quit?"
"They were going to vote for my removal as partner. I beat them to the punch by quitting five minutes before they could vote. It was rather satisfying, truthfully."
"So why not go to another firm? I know you would have ten offers within an hour."
"I've decided to slide all the way to the bottom of the totem pole. Of course, I brought a few of my long-standing clients with me. I'd like to introduce you to a few of them now, if I may?"
Cody's attention piqued at her last statement. "Why would you want to introduce me to your clients?"
"Please?" She didn't want to beg but sensed this represented her last opportunity to convince him she'd started accepting who she truly was, flaws and all. If she didn't, meeting her clients would still be to his benefit. "It involves your future possibilities." Both personal and professional, but no need to get into those de
tails.
He gestured with an outstretched arm. "No promises, but I'll listen."
She nodded and led him inside. Two gentleman and a woman stood when they entered. "Cody Jenkins, let me introduce you to Marvin and Elisha Sanders, long-standing members of a Midwestern Dairy co-op. This gentleman is Nic Stanford, owner of Unique Designs Studio in Milwaukee. All three of whom are clients and good friends of mine."
Evelyn fought to contain her nerves. You'd think she was a greenhorn, her first day on the job, rather than a seasoned veteran. Cody shook hands with everyone.
"Let's all be seated, please."
Once she had their attention, she began. "I'm a firm believer in the power of paying it forward and repaying in kind. Cody served his country in Afghanistan at great personal cost. Since returning home, he and his family have faced some serious challenges, including the decline of his father's health."
She turned to Cody and smiled, hoping to convey all the care, concern, and love she held in her heart for him and, by extension, his family. "The Sanders are aware of many resources that can help with running your farm. Your father can serve as an adviser and, with the proper assistance from the co-op, effectively run his business. With the additional help, output can be increased, which will more than cover the cost of the new hires. Both the Sanders and I will be happy to sit with your father, the family, whomever you'd like, and review the plan. We have an initial draft, and once your father is feeling better, we can work with him to finalize the details."
Cody exhaled and offered a small smile. "It's a very generous offer. I appreciate the thought and preparation that's gone into this. I'll speak with my dad. He can be a little stubborn, though."
Mr. Sanders laughed. "I haven't met a farmer yet who isn't. That's how we survive in tough times—pure stubbornness."
His wife rolled her eyes. "Amen!"
One down. Two to go. Evelyn handed Cody the business card for Sanders Farm. "Here's their number. Call when your father is ready, and the meeting can be arranged."
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