by Julia North
I looked hard in front as we stalked like the leopards through the thick bush. All my muscles were stiff and ready for the kill. My ears were sharp and I darted my eyes from side to side in case any danger was hiding from me.
Suddenly Mobuto put up his hand and stopped. He crouched down and showed us with his arm to get down. We obeyed and fell to our haunches. He turned to us and whispered, “Keep down, we’re nearing the camp. I want no sound. Be careful your boots don’t break the twigs or roots. Now get down flat. We’ll leopard crawl from here.”
We sprawled silently on our stomachs in the long grass, boots curled into the damp soil ready to push forward on our elbows. I pulled my AK up onto my back and kept my face low. I had two spare cartridges taped like the buck horns on my AK. Ay, I would have plenty of bullets to kill with.
I watched Mobuto crawl through the grass and copied him. Bit by bit we crawled forward. My dark spirit was alive and happy with me. I could hear the rustle of the wind through the bush and the insects running for fear.
I made my eyes thin and looked hard in the yellow dawn light through the swaying grass. Far in front I saw the orange glow of small firelight. I lifted my head and sniffed the crisp air. I could smell the wood smoke and cooking and I smiled to myself. This was the village of the enemy. Soon they would taste our power and revenge.
I looked back at David. His body was tense and his face serious with deep eyes. Badboy and Trigger were grinning and Bloodneverdry was licking his lips. They had been on these kills before. I was happy that now I too was with them.
Mobuto shuffled his fat body forward in the soft sand until he had a good view of the village. He turned to us with his finger to his lips and whispered, “No sound now, we must take them by surprise. Wait until I give you the command and then follow me. Bloodneverdry, you take Hotshot and Cleverboy and hit from the left. Badboy, you take Grenadelauncher, Trigger and Scarecrow and hit from the right. The rest of you follow behind me.”
I frowned at David and pulled my mouth in a snarl. Why couldn’t I lead? Mobuto liked Bloodneverdry because he was so fierce but I could be a better killer than him. I saw a picture in my mind of me shooting all the villagers and running fast in front of Bloodneverdry who couldn’t keep up with me. Then I felt him next to me.
He glared at me and then whispered, “Right, sah,” with a proud smile on his lips.
He showed for us to follow him and I looked with hate as he crawled low and quick through the bush like the rattlesnake, but I had to obey. He had his AK high on his back and his dagger was caught between his teeth. I took out the dagger from my belt and put it in my mouth too, and smiled inside. I was sure I looked better than him.
As we moved forward I saw the enemy village clear through the grass with its thatched huts and cattle lowing behind in the kraal. My heart beat so fast I feared it would jump out of me as I saw the shapes of the people near the huts and around the small camp fires.
I bit down on the dagger and suddenly wished I could just shoot my bullets instead. The thought of touching the body of the enemy scared me now that I could see them but I chased the fear away. I mustn’t let Bloodneverdry know because he would tell Nkunda and Mobuto I’m weak. He knew Mobuto liked me too and he would want to see me die. I must be careful.
Suddenly Mobuto commanded, “Forward. Move!”
Bloodneverdry jumped up and took the dagger from his mouth. His body pounced forward and he screamed, “Now!”
I took out my dagger as we leaped up, charging forward out of the bush and screaming with our heads thrown back and mouths wide open, “Aiee, Aiee, Kill the enemy pig. Kill, kill, kill!”
The fierceness of our screams cracked the morning like many broken eggs and our crashing thundered through the bush. The villagers went stiff with the fear, screamed high-pitched and began to run everywhere. The chickens squawked and scattered sending feathers into the air. Everywhere was madness.
I ran like a devil with every part of my body awake. I put the dagger back between my teeth and shot my AK so fast into the air that it danced in my hand. I panted as I shot and spit sprayed out from my mouth. Everywhere the people screamed and ran like a herd of wildebeest from the lion. I zigzagged behind the running figures, firing my devil bullets. Some of them flew up in the air and I saw their blood splatter around them. My body was alive with power and energy. No one could stop me.
People ran to the huts for cover but Mobuto threw grenades at them and they exploded with mad flashes of fire. The flames rose up all over and ate the thatch. We shot a fierce storm of AK bullets into the village. Some of the smaller boys with Mobuto could not fit the AKs on their shoulders and tucked them under their arms as they ran forward, shooting everywhere.
The loud bangs of light from our grenades flashed in front of my eyes as I ran and their booming made my ears dead, but inside my body was strong and fierce and ready to kill. In front the villagers screamed with their fear and pain and ran in mad circles round their huts of fire. Their eyes were big and wide and many held their ears and heads from the big noise. My heart beat with excitement. They were filled with fear of me. I had the power over them.
I pushed my AK back into my shoulder and held it steady. I took aim at the running villagers and fired too many bullets at them. I watched and smiled as one by one, they fell under my aim. It was like magic. I killed people and no enemy bullets could stick to me.
Bloodneverdry ran up behind me and shouted, “Follow me, Hotshot.”
He went like the mad rhino through the fires and I put my AK onto my shoulder and followed him over to the far side of the village. We saw an enemy running to the thick bush behind the village.
Bloodneverdry shot forward and grabbed the man by the neck, pulling him back onto the ground. The man kicked and screamed. He made funny noises in his throat and I saw a big wet patch appear on his pants.
“Dirty enemy pig,” I screamed in my mind as I clenched my dagger between my teeth. The man’s face was a blur to me. All I could see was the enemy face from the movie and I pulled back my lips and screamed. Bloodneverdry held the enemy with one hand and took my dagger out of my mouth.
“Now, Hotshot, cut!” he screamed. “Let’s see if you are as good as you think.”
He pulled the man’s neck back like a chicken. I had to hold my hand tight to stop it shaking. I could not let Bloodneverdry see my fear. This was the enemy who would rape my Thandi. He was the evil one who would kill my brothers and my people. I had to kill him and drink more of the enemy blood.
I drew the sharp teeth of my knife deep into his chicken throat. I heard him babble and saw the dark red blood jump from his throat like a waterspout. His eyes went white and his throat gurgled goodbye to his soul. I could feel his hot enemy blood on my hands and it gave me power. I was a killer. I had killed an enemy pig.
“Aiee,” I screamed, and held the dagger high into the air. I rubbed the blood onto my face and laughed with Bloodneverdry. I had proved myself and he rewarded me with a high five.
“Good work, Hotshot. Let’s find another one.”
I ran with Bloodneverdry and we caught another enemy who was hiding in the hut. I stabbed and stabbed into his shivering body. He would never touch my Thandi. He would never hurt my family. Now I was a true killing machine. I drank deep from the evil inside me and grinned. Now I was a real L.R.A. The General and Mobuto would be proud.
Chapter 23
“Wake up, Modetse.” It was David calling to me but his voice was far away.
“Wake up you are screaming. You’ll make Mobuto come in.”
I turned my head and stared at David. His face looked like it was underwater. My head still buzzed with pictures of blood and killing. I was killing everyone and the blood was flowing from my hands until a warthog rammed me hard in the stomach and my insides tumbled out. I shook my head to take away the horror.
“Are you okay, my brother?”
“I mustn’t sleep again,” I mumbled.
“The dreams; they�
�re worrying you?” David looked sad at me.
I nodded and turned my eyes away. “I think it’s the brown- brown,” I whispered in a small voice. Why did I have this fear inside me? Why had the dark spirits not chased it away? I tensed my face and stomach. I must not let myself be weak. I had the magic inside me. The bullets could not kill me anymore.
David came over to sit on the edge of my bed. “I think the brown-brown makes the mind see bad pictures,” he whispered. He stared at me and then asked, “Who’s Thandi?”
I froze. “What you mean?”
“You were saying the name in your sleep.”
“Oh?” I said and looked away. I had never talked of Thandi before because it was too hard to think about her and it made me feel weak, but she still she came to visit in my dreams.
David looked at me, wanting me to speak.
“She is my sister,” I said after a while.
David nodded like he understood. He smiled sadly and said, “When I sleep I also see the blood. I’ve had enough!”
“Shh,” I said quickly. I looked around the room but the humps of boys were quiet. “You must be careful. You can’t trust anyone. If they hear you they’ll kill you. We’re L.R.A. You must be tough.”
David nodded and then stared far in front. “Yes, Modetse, I know,” he said with sad eyes. He shuffled his feet and looked at the floor then whispered, “I’ll try and be a good L.R.A. boy.”
I looked at David with worried eyes. He was my friend and my blood brother and I had to protect him, but he mustn’t be a traitor. Traitors they burned on the fire and I did not want that to happen to him. If it was any other boy I would kill him or tell on him to Mobuto but not David. He was lucky we were blood brothers.
“I can’t sleep anymore. Let’s go outside?” I whispered.
“Okay,” said David.
We crept out of the hut into the dark night. There were stars scattered high in the sky and the quarter moon hid behind thin clouds. The night air felt cool and fresh. I took a deep breath, which calmed me, and I heard David do the same.
“We’ve been here many moons. You should be stronger, David,” I said. “You must listen to Mobuto and hate the enemy pig.”
“I’m trying. But sometimes when there’s so much blood it makes me want to break.” David’s face was pained. He frowned and his eyes began to water.
I glared at him. “The enemy must bleed. They made us bleed, David; why don’t you hate them?”
David stared and said nothing.
“If you break, they’ll kill you. You know that!” I whispered fiercely. “I also pain inside David. I pain for my sister. I want to become the officer so I can find her on the dump. I must stay strong so I can do this.”
David looked at me in surprise. “You seem so tough, Modetse. I didn’t know you were paining for your sister.”
“Why do you think I have the bad dreams? But we must fight for the L.R.A. If we don’t fight then the enemy will come and kill us and then no one will help Thandi. The General’s our father. We’ve have sworn to him and you cannot break it. The spirits will eat your brain, David. You must listen to Mobuto, David. He’s shown us what the enemy do. We’ve seen their rebel camps.”
“I’ll try, Modetse,” said David. He patted me on the shoulder. “Come, we must go back. There are guards over there.”
I looked across the dark fields. Tall figures were patrolling the boundary. I nodded at David and we crept quietly back inside. I lay on my bed with my eyes open. My jaw was clenched after talking with David. I tensed my fists. David must be careful. He must not betray the L.R.A.
I lay for a long time staring up at the dark ceiling. Thandi was alive again in my mind. She was hungry and crying on the dump. I tried to push the pictures away until the morning sun began to eat away the night, then I closed my eyes for a bit until it was time to rise.
“Hotshot, you and Cleverboy go see Mobuto now!”
I scraped the last of my porridge from the bowl and saluted. David did the same and we ran across to his hut and saluted him from the doorway. He was lying on his big double bed with his head on a pile of white pillows. He looked at us for a long time. I kept my eyes firm to the front. My stomach fluttered. Had we done something wrong? Had he heard about David’s heart?
“So, soldier boys. You’re doing well with the kills, yes?”
“Yes, sah,” we said as we clicked our heels together and saluted again.
He puffed out his chest and looked us up and down.
“Good. Yes good. Now, there’ll be a few changes. Cleverboy, we’ve decided to send you to Intelligence. You can help Lieutenant Bandi there. Hotshot, you’ll stay with the squadron. He got up and hoisted up his trousers over his fat stomach and looked at us with narrow eyes.
“Now move!” he shouted suddenly, and I jerked backwards with wide eyes but inside my stomach was warm.
We ran off and I turned to David and smiled. I could see the gladness in his eyes and deep inside I felt the same. He would be safer over there where he did not have to kill. We reached our hut panting and David took my hand and gave me the strong double handshake.
“Go well, Hotshot,” he said with a big smile. “Take care in the battle.”
“Stay well, Cleverboy,” I said. “I’ll be okay.”
He shook his head and laughed. “It’s my prayer that you will be my brother.”
Then he turned and walked away towards Intelligence HQ. I watched his straight back grow smaller. I would miss him but I was proud that Mobuto had chosen me to be the fighter.
Bilole came from the side of the hut and I turned quickly and saluted him. He nodded at me and smiled.
“So, Hotshot, we’ve another assignment. This’ll be a special one. Commander Mobuto says we leave in one hour. Be ready.”
“Yes, sah.” I saluted with a fast hand. I wondered why it was a special mission and my body buzzed with excitement.
Chapter 24
I followed Commander Mobuto onto the yellow grass field. Richard and Jabu were lined up with Bloodneverdry, Trigger, Shithead and Badboy. There was also a fat one with a bad skin called Uglyboy.
“Stand here in front,” called Bilole.
I moved to where he had shown me in the front with my head held high. I felt their jealous eyes on my back but I clutched my AK by my side and was glad I’d made sure that my uniform looked smart.
Mobuto strutted past our lines like Mr. Chief Lion. He looked us up and down and we all stood stiff and tall knowing we mustn’t make him anger. He lifted his fat stomach up from under his belt and put his hands on his hips. Then he suddenly shouted at us, “We’re going to find a village that are helping the enemy pigs. We’re going to make them pay.”
“Yes and you soldier boys are going to help us. Today you will be true men of the L.R.A.”
I turned to see who had spoken. It was Capt. Nkunda. He glared at me and I kept my eyes fixed to the front. I did not want to upset him. Mobuto looked fierce at him.
“These village hyenas will pay for their treason with their hands and their feet,” continued Mobuto with a sneer.
“Yes.” Nkunda laughed. “The hands they do the work and the feet they do the walking. We’re going to take away the hands of the enemy pigs so that they cannot work.”
“What will we do, soldier boys?” barked Mobuto.
“We will cut off the hands and feet, sah,” we all shouted.
“Why will we do that?” he shouted.
“The hands they do the work and the feet they do the walking. They help the enemy pigs!” we shouted back. Mobuto grinned at us and I went warm inside with prouding.
Mobuto showed for us to fall into line behind him. We were going on foot and not in the trucks so that we could take the villagers by surprise. We followed him, clutching our AKs and packs, across the field and through the gate into the thick green forest behind that smells of wee from the monkey vines.
The cool damp of the forest felt good on my skin because the uniform was
hot. The forest was full with the sound of the rainbirds, honeyguides, hornbills and ground crickets who were all singing hello to us. I looked up high in the trees. The baboons, they were sitting watching with careful eyes and long yellow teeth but I was not afraid of them. I had my AK and my silver machete in my hands. I could cut out their blue balls and eat them if I wanted. They were scared of me that’s why they hid and watched, just like the enemy pig.
“Hotshot, cut off the bush that way. Uglyboy, you follow him. You must cut quick and quiet.”
“Yes, sah.” We saluted.
I sliced like number one solider through the bush with my machete. I wore a red bandana on my head, which looked good with my uniform, and strong brown polished boots instead of the old rubber sandals. My muscles were hard now like the lion’s and my heart was strong from the brown-brown. I was a true killer machine for the L.R.A. and my AK did not feel heavy now. I had the magic juju in me and the dark spirits. I could do anything. I told myself this again and again in my head so that the fear deep inside would go. The more brown-brown I took the better it got. It took all the feelings away so that I could be empty inside and just want to kill. Mobuto’s words buzzed in my ears. We were going to get these tsetse fly villagers. They would not help our enemy again.