“Maybe I’ll go back now and fetch you a nice big pillow,” Kieran responded arrogantly. “I have a pretty good idea what I could do with it.”
“I was just trying to help,” Jayson huffed. “There’s no need to threaten me with suffocation.”
“You both aren’t being very helpful,” I complained, trying desperately to wriggle my way into the shirt despite the pain. My jaw was clenched in acute restraint as my throat longing to shriek; the pain was unmanageable. I stopped for a moment, doubled over and gasping; I could barely breathe.
“What do you want us to do?” Jayson asked seriously.
But it didn’t matter now because, with a cry, I’d forced my arm into the t-shirt. I leaned against the wall for a moment; catching my breath and hoping that the throbbing, dizzying pain would subside. The supposedly ‘short’ sleeves of Kieran’s massive shirt were excessively long on me; the material dangling over my elbows. Still, at least there weren’t any buttons; I doubted I could’ve handled buttons right now. With effort, I finally opened the door.
Kieran, Adrian and Jayson all stared at me.
I muttered angrily under my breath, pushing past them and walking barefooted towards the infirmary. The pain was getting worse; I was sure of it. They soon caught up, Jayson walking on my left, Kieran swaggering on my right and Adrian stalking moodily beside him.
“We can’t go in with you,” Adrian said when we’d stepped under the looming infirmary gates.
Directly in front of me was a small garden orbiting around a stone Phoenix which was wrapped in the wings of a larger, protective Phoenix. Further behind the statue was the first of four buildings. I imagined each building was an infirmary for a specific Tribe; all segregated from each other.
“Are you going to leave?” I asked; worried.
“Well we can’t go in with you,” Adrian repeated. “So it’s a bit pointless us waiting around outside.”
“I’ll come with you,” Jayson volunteered, reaching out to take my good hand. I smiled gratefully, squeezing his hand before letting it go.
“Are you going too?” I turned to Kieran; looking up into those big beautiful eyes hopefully. I was still well aware of the fact that I needed to tell him about my real agreement with Silva. But I was terrified of telling him.
Everything just seemed to be going wrong.
“I’d stay to hold your hand,” Kieran said, abruptly agitated. “But it looks like you’ve already assigned somebody to do that.”
With that he turned and swept off childishly.
I stared after him, shaking my head at his immaturity, but then the pain in my shoulder flared and I rushed towards the entrance of the Fire Infirmary; uncaring whether he was annoyed or not. Once through the main door I reached a reception area –Jayson tagging along behind me- and the woman sat behind the desk got up immediately.
“Her arm was dislocated,” Jayson informed her. She was short with a rounded body and a burst of ginger hair. “And she had a few complications which resulted in her Changing. She returned to human form a few minutes ago and we think some of the bones in her shoulder have shattered.”
The lady rushed over with sympathetic eyes and ushered me into a room on my right without hesitation. “You sit right here, love,” she gestured to a chair. “I’ll fetch a healer straight away. You must be in a lot of pain.” I wasn’t sure if it was a question or not but I nodded anyway.
The room was small and square. There were two chairs inside, both beside a hospital bed, and the walls were bare except for a few shelves which contained various bottles; filled with pale substances. Opposite the bed was a set of wooden drawers which I assumed held medical equipment like bandages, surgical knives, and needles. I sat down slowly, wincing.
“You’re very good with pain, you know,” Jayson observed. “If it was me I’d be kicking and screaming right now.”
I smiled, but the action was forced and unconvincing. “I guess I’m used to it,” I muttered, feeling my arm starting to go numb and tingly –which I knew from experience wasn’t a good sign.
“That sucks,” Jayson said. I nodded in agreement.
The door creaked open and in stepped a timid-looking man. He was fairly small with messy hair, an unshaven face and a sweeping grey coat. His orange eyes focused on me, seemed to assess the damage, then he quickly shuffled over to the shelves on the far side of the room. Standing on his tiptoes the healer reached up, stretching a short hairy arm, to grab hold of a tiny yellow bottle on the very top shelf. He brought it close to his face, reading a label plastered onto the glass, then he carefully carried it over.
“Drink this please,” he said quietly, offering me the bottle. He had a soft, compassionate voice; soothing in a sedative way. “It will help with the pain.”
I nodded gratefully, grasping the bottle and raising it to my lips obediently. The medicine tasted disgusting; like a mixture of bark and acid fizzing reactively between my teeth; which wasn’t pleasant despite it reminding me of popping candy. I swallowed the bizarre concoction, pulling a face, feeling it working almost instantly. The pain in my shoulder dulled from an excruciating implosion to a feeble throb.
“That’s better,” the healer said, almost to himself, but then I realised that there was another person behind him. His apprentice, I guessed, was waiting in the corner of the room; watching his teacher with studious, analysing eyes. “Can you feel the difference in tension in her body?” It took me a moment to understand that the healer was addressing the apprentice.
I had initially forgotten that healers can feel pain in other bodies, but when the apprentice answered, “Yes sir; she has certainly relaxed more,” I remembered instantly. I wondered dazedly why Kieran never mentioned it –especially as he must be able to feel my pain a lot more than these strangers.
“My name is Healer Mathew,” introduced the healer. “This is my assistant Julian. Do you mind if I take a look at your arm?” he asked politely.
“Knock yourself out,” I said, gesturing with my good hand. I quickly amended my words when I saw the healer’s confused frown. “I mean; yes, that’s fine.”
Healer Mathew came closer, bending down so he was at eye level. Closing his eyes in concentration, he raised his hands to my shoulder and slowly traced over the inflamed area; his skin never actually touching mine through Kieran’s shirt. I watched the healers face, identifying by the slightest variation in his expression where the more damaged areas were located. When he finished his inspection, he opened his eyes with a tight grimace.
“I’m afraid there isn’t any way this can be fixed without traditional methods,” Healer Mathew explained softly. “Your bone has completely shattered and unless I work on it straight away you will have difficulty Changing and flying. There is no way this can be healed naturally.”
I nodded reluctantly; what he meant was he was going to have to heal me the way Kieran does. I didn’t know why, but I felt very opposed to the idea. I didn’t want Healer Mathew to heal me in that way -it was something intimate and special- something I wanted to share only with Kieran.
I knew it sounded silly; but I felt like I would be cheating on Kieran.
But on the other hand, I did want to be able to fly again.
“Do what you must,” I allowed solemnly, glancing over at Jayson.
He smiled encouragingly, “It’ll be fine, Ruby.”
I wasn’t quite so convinced. The healer whispered something under his breath, his palms gradually coating in dark red marks. He pressed his hands against my shoulder, but as soon as he did something went wrong.
An almighty zap of electrical energy seemed to shoot from the top of my spine; running directly into Healer Mathew’s arm. He screamed as the energy collided with his flesh and he was immediately flung from me; knocked powerfully against the wall. Suddenly the pain in my arm ignited. Rippling, flaming hot agony absorbed every cell in my body. I doubled over, gasping; my eyes stinging with tears that rolled rapidly down my cheeks.
“What wa
s that?” I exclaimed. This was too much; I could feel myself blacking out. I sat up straight to keep myself from falling into unconsciousness. Jayson was yelling at the healer, but I couldn’t quite comprehend his words.
The healer’s face was in a state of blank shock. He had collapsed onto the floor, but was now sluggishly sitting up, his mouth gaping open like a fish. The apprentice rushed from the room, returning a moment later with an older healer, this one with a long white beard and a calm professional air.
“What happened?” asked the older man, reaching down to help Healer Mathew.
Healer Mathew struggled upright, his face still astonished as he shook his head, “I think she rejected me.”
The older healer snapped his fingers at the apprentice. “You, take Mathew outside to get some fresh air. He’s in shock.” He turned to Jayson with a composed authority and said, “Young man, will you please go and wait in the waiting room.”
The question was rhetorical but Jayson protested stubbornly, “I’m not leaving her.”
“If you want her to be healed, you will,” the healer said firmly and eventually, grudgingly, Jayson left the room.
All this seemed to be happening as if I were watching it from somewhere else. The pain took control of my senses, but it was only when the other healer placed his tattooed palms on me that I screamed. Another rush of electrical energy blasted through me, bombarding straight into the healer. This healer was stronger and he continued trying to heal me, but another wave of pain hit him. Then another. Every time it got worse.
“Stop!” I yelled, hopeless sobs threatening to tear me apart. “Stop it!”
But the healer wasn’t surrendering yet. My entire body was shaking. The pain was everywhere I couldn’t escape it. I struggled to get away from him, but I was too weak to fight him off. The electric currents were getting worse; my body was rejecting him. It was too much. I couldn’t take it.
I heard a loud bang as the door swung open and crashed into the wall. I couldn’t stop wailing hysterically, but I managed to look up. Stood in the threshold like a Knight in shining armour, was Kieran. He hurtled into the room, standing over the old man with a fierce confidence in his stance and a menacing glint in his suddenly-black eyes.
“Let her go now,” Kieran warned.
“You shouldn’t be here!” cried the old man, his grasp on me loosening, his eyes fearful but resilient. “Get out before I alert the authorities!”
Kieran rolled his eyes, ignoring him and sweeping me up into his arms. The old healer shouted his protests, tugging at Kieran’s arm. Kieran looked vaguely irritated, shrugged, and then punched him in the face; still managing to hold me up with one arm. The healer toppled over, landing roughly on the floor; his mouth open in astonishment but his words silenced.
The next few minutes weren’t clear in my head. All I remembered the next day was being carried down endless corridors. When I came around a little I realised I was in a rectangular room with a set of open glass windows that streamed in light and bitter winter wind. It was empty of anything else.
My eyes focused on the figure holding me; it was Kieran. So I hadn’t imagined him bursting into the infirmary after all. He carefully placed me down on the wooden floor. He quietly asked me to sit upright. I did and the pain was astonishing; I think I cried out but I was too far gone to notice.
Kieran took a deep breath and carefully laid his hands over my shoulder. His hands were warm and my body didn’t reject him. If anything, my body pulled him in tighter; encouraging him to heal me. The pain was fading rapidly, but Kieran’s muscles bunched and tightened as he altruistically stole my pain. His hands remained steady but his breathing quickened.
And then slowly, very slowly, I began to feel my bones reforming from the incredible heat that seeped from Kieran’s hands.
When it was all over we were both gasping; waiting for the pain to dull into nothingness. We were as still as statues carved from everlasting marble.
Kieran stood up and the momentary peace was broken.
And everything caught up with me.
He made an infuriated, exasperated noise in the back of his throat. The skin on his clenched fists was stained white over flexed knuckles. He turned to the wall and -rising his arm in angry frustration- he slammed his fist into the concrete. A blast of dust flew off the wall from impact and when Kieran pulled back his bleeding hand the wall had a large indentation in it.
He ran his bloody hand through his hair and then placed it on the wall, leaning on it with his face downcast. “That’s it,” he whispered. The blood from his knuckles ran down the wall like gruesome red paint.
I knelt on the floor; my chest heaving in shock.
Then I finally admitted, in a voice barely audible, “Silva, the psychic… she knows about us.” I said the words like they were a death sentence.
“I guessed as much,” he answered, not looking up.
“She said we have to end it or the deals off,” I breathed shakily, a different kind of tears filling my eyes.
Time was slowing. A lump blocked my throat like a drainpipe clogged with autumn leaves. I could feel wisps of my hair streaking across my face, each individual strand pattering against my skin. Perspiration formulated across my sticky forehead and at last my eyes brimmed with tears. The drops rolled freely down my cheeks. All this passed in seconds, though the clock ticking in my heart cried of labouring hours.
To be honest, I’d expected this.
I’d told myself that the time I’d shared with happiness was fragile, like a precariously weighted scale, and that I could not continue this way forever. But I’d concluded that, as time changed, maybe the consequences would too.
But there was no going back now.
You see that’s the annoying thing about time; it cannot be rewound.
And our choice, our fatal flaws, cannot be erased.
We were already sentenced.
“We’ve gone too far, Ruby,” Kieran whispered, watching his blood as it dribbled down the wall.
He finally looked at me and his beautiful features seemed shattered with torment. “I can’t see you anymore,” he said brokenly. “I don’t even think I can be around you anymore. I can’t help myself when you’re near, and now I’ve done this,” he glanced down at his hands. “The stakes are way too high. It’s different now. It’s worse.”
I shook my head, my heart sinking. “You can’t do this to me, Kieran.”
Kieran closed his eyes, “It’s for you that I’m doing this.”
“No!” I yelled suddenly. “You’re lying. This can’t be over. You’ve never let anyone stop you before.” I don’t know why it was hitting me so hard now; I knew this was going to happen the moment I saw Silva.
His eyes flashed open and he suddenly came forwards.
He sunk to his knees before me, reaching out and practically throwing his arms around my shoulders, gripping onto me the way the dying grip onto life. Our lips came together like magnets and he kissed me with so much passion and longing that I thought it might kill me.
My lips brushed his desperately. I wrapped my arms around him, my fingers digging into the muscles of his back. The world seemed to take a deep hesitant breath around me, watching in mournful silence; like it knew this was the last time. It was the last time. He tasted like blood and I tasted like tears, but I didn’t care. Nothing could have made me want to stop. Nothing could have made me let him go.
Except Kieran himself.
Too quickly it was over, and he was walking away.
Before he left he leaned his forehead against the doorway and uttered; “I’ve never been given a reason to stop. But now, you’re my reason.” His voice dropped even deeper as his eyes flashed to me with a deep anguish. “It’s always been for you, Ruby. From the moment I met you.”
I sat there on my knees, feeling the cold like an arctic blizzard; suddenly an even worse pain was pinning me down. A pain I feared would last forever.
Eventually I heard the door open.
A gentle voice broke the silence. “He said you’d be in here.”
I looked up at Jayson and realised that he knew as well. They all knew.
He didn’t say anything, but he was holding his hand out towards me.
It wasn’t a difficult decision really; to take his hand or to stay down on the floor. But he was there, appearing to me like an archangel with his golden curls and soft amber eyes. He was acting out of kindness and friendship; just what I needed as my surrounding world crashed and burned; consequences taking control. He was offering to help me; to be there for me. But did I want him to be? The answer to that question would start a brand new beginning.
His hand was still there.
So I took a deep breath and reached for it.
Chapter Fourteen
“That is your house?” I asked in shock.
At four stories high and a hundred metres long it was almost passable as a palace; though the modern layout contradicted that notion. It was constructed from a brown rock carved into massive square bricks and wooden beams which were charred black. Arched windows faced north on every floor; glittering in the rapidly fading sunlight.
A scary thought flashed through my head; how many people did Jayson have to kill to afford such an impressive estate?
Jayson laughed at my question. “No,” he grinned and pointed. “You see those two windows on the fourth floor to the right?” I nodded comprehendingly. “They’re mine. The rest of it belongs to other people.”
“What is it?” I wondered. “Like flats or something?”
“It’s called a Tribe House,” he enlightened me. “Each floor is for a different Tribe and you buy separate rooms on your floor. There are four common rooms on each floor; each with a kitchen and lounge and so on. I share a common room with Anya, Flint and Elena.”
“Where am I going to sleep then?” I asked.
“We pulled together and brought the spare room in our apartment a few months ago, just to store our things in, so you can stay there for a while. It’s not amazing or anything, but it has a bathroom and a bed.”
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