“Not true,” he corrected. “I just have one.”
Before I realised that I was doing it I made a growling noise in the back of my throat. I tore my eyes away from him, fury pounding in my veins, and stomped off into the apartment. Inside was still just as manic, rammed with drunken people. I analysed the room carefully, hoping to discover Jayson, but instead my heart dropped as I noticed Silva walking my way with a purposeful glide. I didn’t know what to do so I stood my ground and tried to look fierce as she sized me up.
“I heard the news.” She said coldly, “Not bad, Swartette.”
“Thanks,” I muttered cautiously.
“I just thought I’d pop by to remind you about our deal,” she said.
As if I could forget, I thought miserably, but said aloud: “What about it?”
“I just thought I’d mention that you have about a week to remove my father and nominate me. Any later than that and I won’t have enough time to win my own Garatourii.” She winked cruelly and went; leaving me to dwell on that bombshell.
Her words gradually sunk in. One week. One week to kill someone.
The music seem to stop playing around me, the dancing seemed to slow and I could feel a cold sweat spread across my skin as the realisation of that sunk in. I wandered absently from where I was stood, coincidentally ending up sat on one of the sofa’s in the centre of the room. I sunk down into the warn material and closed my eyes; trying to block out my surroundings. I rubbed my aching forehead and tried to seriously think over if I could bring myself to kill an Elder.
I knew the answer already. No. No I couldn’t.
“Drink?” Someone asked, and I glanced over to see I’d sat beside Jayson. He offered me something fluorescent green from a sparkling glass.
I took it gingerly, and brought it closer to examine. It looked absolutely vile, like something you’d use to disinfect the toilet, but I brought it to my lips anyway. It burned my throat as I swallowed but after a moment I felt warm and tingly. It was seriously strong stuff.
Across from me Kieran had plonked back down between Sofia and the other two nameless beauties. He had this look on his face that I despised, this look that said he’d won the competition; despite the fact that I hadn’t realised I’d entered. As me and Jayson chattered quietly, about nothing in particular, we both drank what seemed like an awful lot of toilet cleaner. After a while I felt much better about life.
Until I realised what Kieran was doing opposite me.
He flirted outrageously with all three girls and as I watched, feeling a little nauseated from the sight, I realised that they were all desperately rallying for his attention. They appeared mesmerised into stupidity by his looks, melting into putty if he brushed their hair back or whispered something naughty in their ears. He treated them all equally, which blatantly both infuriated and empowered them; as no one knew who had his favour. I doubted Kieran had even decided yet. They giggled constantly, touching his chest and hair, practically thrusting themselves at him.
I glared at the scene. My anger built rapidly; despite me knowing that this was Kieran’s intention. He was trying to make me jealous.
Well two can play at that game. I looked over at Jayson, who was currently speaking but I wasn’t paying any attention, and leaned in closer. I pressed my body against him so close I could smell the sweetness of his skin, clean and warm, and the faint taint of alcohol on his breath. He stopped talking instantly, guessing my body language, and randomly glanced away.
I tried to follow his line of vision but he’d already returned his gaze to me. His expression was fierce suddenly, alight with a peculiar kind of determination. In that moment he looked like a scorned angel.
His kiss was surprising. Whenever we’d kissed before it had always been warm and gentle and affectionate -kind of an extension of our friendship- but now his lips were hard against mine. He grabbed the back of my head roughly, pulling at my hair in his crushing passion. I ignored the fact that he’d messed up my braid and kissed him back enthusiastically. I pulled away after a moment and grinned at him; trying to catch a sneaky glance at Kieran; hoping he’d seen. My head whirled a little with intoxication.
Kieran’s black glare was unmistakable. I smirked childishly.
“What was that for?” Jayson wondered, smiling softly.
I shrugged, “You kissed me.” I smiled back, feeling slightly guilty.
However as I spoke I caught a glimpse of Kieran in front of me and a jolt of jealousy shot painfully into my system. He was now kissing Sofia, but kissing her in a way I had never experienced before in my entire life.
It was slow, deliberate and ridiculously hot. He bit her lip and played with her tongue, he lay his hand on her bare thigh and moved it deliberately across her skin. Then, right before my horrified eyes, he turned to one of the other girls and did the same with her. And they just let him. They wanted him so bad they didn’t even care that he favoured none of them. That he didn’t even like any of them; he just wanted to use them. How stupid can you get?
I was outraged. I couldn’t believe it. If he thought that would make me crack and dissolve into tears then he was wrong. So I turned to Jayson and stepped it up a gear. I kissed Jayson with everything I had, including my passionate fury. I grabbed his shoulders and hauled him over to me, letting us both slide back into the sofa with him on top of me. He seemed shocked by this reaction, but he didn’t stop.
As he kissed me I opened my eyes and glanced at Kieran, but he was pretty preoccupied with the girl on his lap and the one kissing his neck. I was so angry. I couldn’t believe him. What a slut. He knew exactly what he was doing. He played each girl against each other, taunting them, teasing them.
Underneath all my anger, it was breaking my heart to watch.
Jayson leant back so his weight no longer trapped me and he grinned cheekily. He sat up onto his knees and then swung his legs over the sofa to stand up. I stared up at him confusedly, but that grin was still there as he reached out for me; hauling me into his arms, proclaiming loudly that we should head to his bedroom. Suddenly panic seized my chest. What?
I obviously didn’t have much of a choice. He carried me towards his room and just before we reached the threshold I had the satisfaction of seeing Kieran’s mortified, infuriated expression. I half expected him to follow us in.
But he didn’t. Jayson shut the door behind us before lowering me onto the bed. A fear hit me, a worry that I might have to do something with Jayson that I was no way near ready for. Kissing was one thing; but getting into bed with Jayson, with unknown possibilities, was terrifying to contemplate.
However, as soon as he let me go he shuffled back a couple of paces; looking down at me expectantly; his entire demeanour changing dramatically. His expression had transformed, his eyebrows knitted together and his forehead creased; as if he were a parent and I was a wronged child.
“What was all that about?” he asked. A mixture of emotions too complex to be deciphered were scattered across his features. “Ruby,” he said calmly. “That wasn’t you then.”
I sat up in the bed and looked down uncomfortably. A flash flood of guilt drowned me spontaneously, pulling me deep into unfathomable depths. I’d obviously hurt Jayson. He must have known what I was doing.
“You’ve never been like that with me,” he continued, his frown deepening. “It was like you were putting on a show. Both you and Kieran. Don’t think I didn’t notice.”
I bit my bottom lip, feeling like I was being verbally assaulted by a school teacher for doodling in my workbook. “I’m sorry,” I said, unable to think of anything else.
“What’s going on Ruby?” he asked, staring into my eyes, so fiercely and intensely I couldn’t look away. “There’s something you’re not telling me. “
I shook my head, tearing my eyes away and examining my nails.
There was a moment of silence, then finally Jayson uttered. “It’s him, isn’t it?”
I glanced up at him innocently, my eyes deceitful
ly wide.
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“Don’t bullshit me,” he snapped at my tone. “You know what I mean.”
“There’s nothing going on with me and Kieran.” I protested, my lie falling flat as Jayson’s amber eyes seemingly burrowed into my brain, attacking my feeble defences. Eventually I sighed, my shoulders sagging like the rafters in an old barn. “Anymore,” I breathed shakily, amending my previous comment.
Jayson exhaled sharply and turned away from me so I couldn’t see his face. After a moment he muttered, “Well that was a harsh confirmation.”
I stood up and edged closer to him quietly, careful not to make any sudden movements; as if he were a skittish horse or an unpredictable lion. I touched his shoulder tenderly, trying to coax him out of his rigid position.
“I’m sorry,” I uttered, trying desperately to make him understand. “I never meant to hurt you.” And I didn’t. I just wasn’t thinking about him.
Jayson turned around and his features were blank, as free from expression as a white board wiped clean. “It would never work,” he told me gently. “Not just because of his Tribe but because of him. The Ashaiks are a rare breed of heartless thugs. They’ll use you and leave you. You won’t change him. You should stay away and forget him.”
“I know.” I agreed miserably.
“But you love him?” Jayson guessed apathetically, his typically bright eyes sombre, like a grey overcast had blew across his vision.
I paused momentarily, then blurted out the truth before my head had chance to protest. “I wish I didn’t.” I answered. I avoided his wintery eyes, continuing honestly, “I love him and I hate him. I can’t stand to be near him. Or away from him. I need him, but it kills me. Do you know what I mean? Have you ever felt like this?”
He laughed half-heartedly, and I gazed quizzically at the sound. It was a laugh, but it was as hollow as a dead branch. “Yes,” he smiled sadly.
“What happened with her?” I wondered gently.
He raised his hand and reached out for me, lightly trailing his fingertip over my cheek. He stared into my eyes and that sadness was there again. “They were stolen away by Kieran.” He uttered; his voice cracking slightly.
I swallowed uncomfortably, and a memory of a conversation between Kieran and Jayson waded into my mind, of a particular snowy night during our return from Lynk’s caves. “The brother I once had would have forgiven me. There’s something else. It’s to do with me isn’t it?” Jayson had asked Kieran quietly. “Me and the person I love.” Another memory came, and it was Kieran’s voice which I remembered. “Don’t act so blind. Everyone can see the way he looks at you, like he wants to rip off your clothes right then and there.”
I guess maybe I should have been more careful with Jayson. He was my best friend and I had totally messed him about; used him even. I felt so guilty.
Jayson held my gaze for a moment before looking away. There was a brief, slightly awkward silence before he said, “Look we’re going to have to be up really early tomorrow.” He deliberated momentarily, then amended himself with: “Today. So I’m going to go to bed. Hopefully Flint will kick everyone out before I wake up.”
I nodded, but stood there for a moment before asking sheepishly. “I know this is going to sound crazy, and I totally understand if you want me to leave, but would you mind too much if I sleep in here tonight? I really don’t want to see anyone.”
He looked at me. I knew he understood that I meant I didn’t want to see Kieran. He sighed finally, then shrugged. “Fine, but I want the left side.”
In the end it wasn’t that bad being alone in a bed with Jayson. I slept the entire night, well what was left of it, deeply and dreamlessly. I was so exhausted that the continuing party outside didn’t even bother me. When Jayson woke me up in the morning, a whole three hours later, for our first Council meeting, it was only slightly uncomfortable, and I soon left his room to take a shower in my own bathroom.
In the living room the place was quiet, despite the sleeping bodies occasionally scattered across the floor. Those still awake murmured to each other drunkenly. It was an absolute mess though, and I guaranteed that I was not cleaning it up. It stunk too, of booze and smoke and sweat.
As I made my way to my bedroom I noticed the doorknob of my room rotating and a horrible feeling overwhelmed me. Someone was stepping out of my door. My heart froze as I recognised her, and then the woman behind her. Sofia was obviously fastening up her shirt and glanced at me before continuing on. The girl behind her, one of the nameless creatures from last night, was tugging down her skirt. Their hair and makeup was messy and their expressions were embarrassed and slightly ashamed. They avoided eye contact with anyone. A dawning realisation grew in me.
I stepped over to my room, my heart thudding as I opened the door.
And discovered Kieran lying half-naked on my own bed.
Chapter Twenty Two
I stared at Kieran, my mouth dropping open in astonishment, my eyes widening with devastation. I didn’t know what to do, but he was there, lying on my bed with his shirt hanging off of his shoulders, the material gaping open at the front, and his belt buckle only just being put back into place by his own clumsy fingertips.
His face was open with honest surprise, an expression that was slowly dissolving into something hard and stern; the face of a severe drill sergeant. Cutting. Indifferent. Sharp. But all I could take in was the messiness of his normally perfect hair, the rip on his left collar, and the lipstick on his neck.
I could feel my face crumble in on itself in despair. My heartbeat persevered, but it was slowing, as if giving up the battle to beat as it broke into a million pieces. Tears welled up in my eyes, but they frustrated me as I didn’t want Kieran see my pain, and coincidently this unleashed my anger.
“How could you?” I snarled, my voice struggling to get past my locked teeth; my jaw was clenched so tight it ached from the action. I glared at him, my eyes narrowing into slits. “In my own bed. How could you?” I demanded.
“This is your bed?” Kieran wondered lightly, glancing around as he rubbed his head, apparently oblivious to my barely contained fury. “I thought you normally slept in a coffin.”
That made me snap. A storm of animosity overwhelmed my senses and instinctively my legs moved towards him; my arm rising automatically. Red clouded my vision as I stormed closer and before I could stop myself I slapped him as hard as I could across that gorgeous face of his. His astonishment was obvious, as in any other situation his reflexes would have taken over and he would have caught my wrist. Instead he just stared at me with blank shock.
“How could you?!” I screamed, tears running down my face. “You disgusting excuse of a man. Did I really mean so little to you?”
“What exactly do you think I’ve done?” Kieran said sharply, the shock diminishing from his expression and his own anger dominating his features.
“Don’t give me that,” I snapped furiously. “I just saw Sofia and another girl leave this room. Both of them were adjusting their clothes. And look at the state of you! There’s makeup on your neck. Your shirt and jeans are undone. Do you really think I’m innocent enough, or dumb enough, not to put two and two together? Or shall I say one and two together?”
Kieran opened his mouth to say something but I interrupted him, my rant raising a few octaves. “And what happened to the other girl from last night? You did have three doting on your every word. What was up with her? Not quite beautiful enough to join in with your sick little fantasy?”
“I came in here to get away from them.” He growled viciously, “It’s not my fault they followed me.”
“Oh and let me guess, it wasn’t your fault that you had sex with them either?” I pried sarcastically. “I bet they just fell right onto you didn’t they?”
“You have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“You utter scumbag.” I said. He rose to his feet before me, and with me being so close to the bed, when he stood I
could feel his body just inches from me. I straightened my spine; trying to appear tall and not intimidated. “Chara and Jayson were right about you.” I told him. “I should have listened to them.”
“You told Jayson about us?!” Kieran enquired; his voice as cutting as a sharpened blade. “When was that? Before or after you screwed him just to spite me?”
“I did nothing of the sort,” I spat. “Do you really think I would?”
“Then please, enlighten me as to why you never left his room for the past three hours?” Kieran wondered icily.
“I went to sleep.”
“You went to sleep.” He repeated sardonically, his tired emerald eyes flaring with a sudden energy. “Do you really expect me to believe that?”
“Believe what you want,” I snapped, my emotions flying. “Just get out.”
“What?” he said, a slight surprise in his tone.
“I mean it,” I said sternly, looking directly into his eyes. I couldn’t believe this was happening. “I don’t want to see you. You’ve now poisoned any good memory I’ve ever had of you.”
“Ruby I-“ he began, his expression changing but I deliberately looked away.
“Get out.” I said slowly. My anger and pain had built so much I could barely contain it. When he didn’t move or speak I raised my voice and shouted, “Get out!” I was crying quite openly now; there was no opportunity to disguise the anguish I felt. How could he do this to me? “Get out!” I cried, moving to the door and yanking it open, unaware that people in the main room were stirring. “Get out of my room and get out of my life! I meant it Kieran. Go.”
He stared at me, but eventually walked towards me. Before he left he leaned in close and whispered with a voice like acid, “I’ll go. But don’t expect me to come back.” And with that he left me, with no shoes on his feet and his shirt still undone.
And somehow, after breaking down into hysterical tears only twice, clinging to Jayson’s comforting warmth, I managed to get dressed for the Council.
Risen (The Firebird Trilogy Book 2) Page 26