by Deja King
"Because you're a sweet person, Nichelle. Instead of putting the blame on others, you'd much rather put it on yourself."
"That's crazy you say that, because that's so true."
"How did you find out?" again, he already knew the answer, but continued the charade.
"His wife showed up after the funeral and told me."
"That must've been hard."
"It was devastating! She shattered damn near every idea I had about the love Carmelo and I shared."
"That man might've fucked up, but trust, he loved you."
Nichelle turned her entire body around in the passenger seat and stared at Renny. "You really think so?" She yearned to believe that.
"I know so. I saw you together a couple of times, and trust, I know when a man loves a woman. And Carmelo definitely loved you."
"Tierra told me the same thing, but hearing that from another man makes it seem more believable." The fact that Renny didn't bash Carmelo like Nichelle thought most men would do, especially one that admitted he liked her, made her find him more attractive. Renny was no fool. He figured that would be the exact affect it would have on her.
"I am sorry you had to get put out your crib like that. His wife didn't have to come so hard at you, but then again, she probably was bitter, which is understandable too."
"Yeah, that's how I felt. Tierra thought I should stay just to fuck wit' her, but that's not my style."
"I can tell, and it's another quality that makes you appealing."
"You gon' stop wit' all the compliments! You gon' make my already swollen face get even bigger."
"I doubt I can do that," he joked.
"Forget you!" Nichelle said, playfully hitting Renny on the arm. Then she hissed and sat back in the seat.
"What's wrong?" It was visible to Renny that something had quickly upset her.
"I don't want to go home yet."
"What, you hungry? You want me to stop and get you something to eat?"
"I mean, I don't want to go back to my mothers' and stay there. She's gon' grill the shit out of me when she sees my face. Then to tell her about the miscarriage and all that other shit, I ain't ready for all that."
"Do you want me to take you to a friend's place?"
"Tierra is the only friend I have, and we live in the same building. A lot of times she acts more like my mother than a friend, so I don't feel like seeing her either."
"So, where do you want me to take you? If you want, I can get you a room at a hotel for however long you like."
"Thanks, but I don't want to be alone."
"Do you want to stay with me for a couple of days? I have a couple extra bedrooms, and I promise not to interfere on your space."
"You really wouldn't mind? I mean, I know you probably have a lot of women that you be entertaining. I wouldn't want to cramp your style."
"I don't entertain women at my crib. I prefer to maintain my privacy."
"So why are you letting me stay?"
"Because I know you're going through a rough time, and I consider us friends. This ain't `bout no entertaining'."
Nichelle sat back in the seat and thought about what Renny said. She wasn't sure if she liked being called just his friend. Then her mind began wondering about the type of women he would entertain, how they looked, and where he did the entertaining, since it wasn't at his crib.
As Renny crossed over the George Washington Bridge, headed to New Jersey, she realized that all the things she shouldn't care about in regards to Renny's personal life, she found herself deliberating on it.
"Hey, Ms. Martin," did Nichelle leave for school yet?"
"No, you haven't spoken to her?"
"Not since early yesterday. Why, where is she?"
"The hospital. I'm surprised she didn't call you."
"The hospital! What happened? Is she alright?" Tierra instantly thought about the baby Nichelle was carrying, and wondered if that had anything to do with it. She didn't want to say too much though, because she wasn't sure if Nichelle had confided in her mother about the pregnancy yet.
"Your guess is as good as mine. When she called last night, she wouldn't tell me nothing."
"What hospital is she at?"
"I don't know. She wouldn't say, and I didn't even bother to call around and ask. She told me she was fine, and begged me not to come and see her, so I let it be. When Nichelle is ready, she'll tell me what happened."
"You ain't worried?"
"Of course I'm worried! But Nichelle is eighteen years old. One thing I've learned over the years, is that when somebody wants to be left alone, give them their space."
"Will she be home today?"
"Supposed to be."
"I hope so, because I really need to speak to her."
"Did you try her cell?"
"Yeah, but it keeps going straight to voice mail."
"Again, she don't want to be bothered, so let her be. When Nichelle's ready, she'll be back. Until then, all I can do is keep her in my prayers."
"I hear you. If you talk to her before me, please tell her to give me a call."
"I will, Tierra. You take care now," Ms. Martin said, closing the door.
Tierra wished her mother could be more like Nichelle's mom-laid back and not preachy. She felt her mother would never respect her wishes and give her space if she needed it. Instead, she would give her a sermon about all the things she was doing wrong, and what to do to make it right. But Tierra hoped that she would be escaping the constant lectures from her mother in the near future. She had done her part on the proposition that was offered to her, and soon planned on cashing in.
w6ff~r3&e,x
Loyalty in the streets can be a dicey call. When it's all lovely for everybody in the crew, the allegiance seems intact. But the second one of its members comes under attack, that's when the cracks begin to show.
"Damn, yo', your face is fucked up! Nichelle did a number on you!" Kyla commented to Lerrick as they sat in White Castle.
"It looks better than it did when you first got the stitches," Cinthia said, trying to make Lerrick feel a little bit better.
"That's a'ight, Nichelle may have fucked my face up, but when I get done wit' her, her own mother won't even be able to recognize her."
"Lerrick, I know you ain't still gon' fuck wit' her. I think it's best you let it go, especially since you were the one who started it anyway. If you would've left when Cinthia and I broke out, we wouldn't even be having this conversation."
"Fuck that!" Lerrick flung her arm, knocking her hamburger off the table. "I have to walk around for the rest of my life wit' this scar on my face! Ain't no way I'ma let that snobby bitch get away wit' this!"
"Lerrick, you know you my girl, but I might have to agree wit' Kyla on this one. Maybe you should let it go. She looked real bad when we left her on that bathroom floor, then homegirl said she was pregnant too. Maybe that's why ain't nobody seen her, `cause she damn sure ain't been in school. What if she lost the baby?" Cinthia's voice went low, and she glanced around the table, shaking her head nervously.
"That bitch was lying. She wasn't pregnant, and I don't give a fuck if she was! Nichelle can't hide forever. Soon she gon' have to show her face, and when she do, I'll be waiting to attack that ass!"
What was supposed to have been a couple days of Nichelle hiding out at Renny's house quickly turned into a few weeks. But it was understandable why Nichelle was finding it so difficult to leave. From the moment the private elevator took them from the garage to the top floor, she started tripping. She thought she was living beyond good at the condo she shared with Carmelo, but in comparison to the townhouse Renny called home, they had been slumming it.
Nichelle had never even known cribs like this existed. The four bedrooms, three and a half bathroom domain was spectacular, to say the least. It had direct southeast views of the Hudson River and the Manhattan skyline. Even though she didn't know how to cook, when she walked into the kitchen, it made her want to learn how. It had custom cherr
y cabinetry with opaque glass fronts, a granite countertop island and flooring, onyx mosaic back splash, and of course, top-of-the-line stainless steel appliances.
The three-level staircases were granite and marble, with marble floors in the great room, dining room and family room. The upper level had bamboo flooring, and the lower level had a home theater. The hotness of the crib was almost too much for Nichelle to take in.
"I know you're ready for me to leave," Nichelle said, as she sat at the kitchen table eating a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, Crunch Berries cereal.
Renny sat across from her at the table reading the Wall Street, journal like he did every morning, and ignored her for a few minutes. For the past week, she would make the same statement, only for Renny to pacify her. This time it would be different.
"You're right. I am ready for you to go. Hurry up and get your things together so I can take you home," he answered, not moving his eyes away from the newspaper.
Nichelle dropped her spoon, and the milk and cereal splashed on the glass top.
"I'm so sorry!" Nichelle jumped up and retrieved some paper towels and wet them to clean up the mess she made. The shock of hearing Renny's reply to what she said made her whole body jump. "After I finish cleaning up this mess, I'll get dressed so you can take me back to Queens."
Renny looked over his newspaper on the sly, and could see the sadness on Nichelle's face as she steadily kept wiping the same spot that was already clean. "I was fuckin' wit' you! You know I don't want you to leave."
"Yes, you do. You're only saying that now because you feel sorry for me."
"Nichelle, I'm serious. It was a joke. Every day it's the same routine, you make that statement, and I always tell you, you're good. But it's like you don't believe me, so I wanted to cure you from that shit. So, do we have a deal? Will you stop asking me that same bullshit question? If I wanted you gone, I would've helped you get your shit together and took you home. . .believe me!"
During the time Nichelle had been around Renny, it was true that he wasn't one to hold back his thoughts. If he didn't approve of something, he was quick to let you know. Nichelle got a small dose of it on the second day she was there. While touring the three-level townhouse, she came across a room on the top floor with the door closed. Thinking nothing of it, she opened the door and was about to turn on the light when Renny walked up on her. He didn't ask her any questions, he simply told her to close the door. And in a very calm, cool, collective manner, he said that she was welcome to make herself comfortable in any room in the house, except for that one, and to never go in there again. His direct, no-nonsense approach would make even the boldest person back down and follow his directions.
"I do believe you. I guess what it is, is that I'm not ready to leave. But then who would want to leave a place like this?" she smiled, admiring her surroundings.
"So what, you want to move in permanently?"
The question caught Nichelle so completely off guard that she didn't know how to respond. "Is this a trick question?" she finally asked.
"The only trick is what your answer is gonna be," Renny laughed. "Living in Edgewater, New Jersey is a big difference than Queens. You have to think about being away from your family and friends."
"Besides my mom and Tierra, there ain't nothing left for me in Queens. My mother's always working, so I hardly saw her anyway and Tierra, we can still hangout sometimes. And it's not like I would stay here forever, just until I got my mind right."
"Is that a `yes'?"
"Of course it's a `yes', as long as you're cool with it."
"Good, but I only have one stipulation."
"I knew it. So what do you want from me?" Nichelle wouldn't admit it to Renny, but she hoped the stipulation would be that she had to stop sleeping in one of his guest bedrooms and give him some pussy. Since she'd been there, Renny hadn't so much as tried to kiss her, and it had made her want him even more. When Ne-Yo had said it was the year of the gentleman, Renny was it. He had provided her with clothes, food, and shelter, not asking her for shit in return. Now he had a stipulation, and Nichelle wanted it to be one where she could show him how grateful she was for all his generosity.
"I want you to finish high school. You're a senior with only a few months until you graduate. If you want to stay here, you have to finish school."
Nichelle put her head down and sighed. "I don't want to go back there."
"Why not?"
"For one, do you know how early I would have to get up to get to school everyday?"
"Anything worth having, you have to make sacrifices. It's only a few more months, Nichelle."
"Plus, I'm so far behind on my schoolwork I'll never be able to catch up."
"Enough with the excuses. You see this newspaper I'm reading?" Renny asked, holding up the 1Vall Street, journal. "I read this every day so I can know what the fuck is going on in corporate America, because believe it or not, this shit dictates a lot of what's poppin' off in the streets. Knowledge really is fuckin' power, and being a dumbass will never get you any fuckin' where in life. If I didn't think you had potential to make something out of your life, I would tell you to drop out and work for me doing some street dirt. But, you're better than that."
"How do you know?"
"Because I read some of the poems and short stories you've written since you've been here."
"You went in my room?"
"No, the other night when you fell asleep in the theater room, your notebook was open on the chair next to you, and I read it. There were some powerful words in there. But you need your education."
"I don't know, Renny. I have so many bad memories at that school. I don't know if I can go back."
"Yes, you can, and you will."
She looked up at him, and it was difficult to tell a man like him `no'.
"Okay, I'll go back, but since it's Thursday, and the week is about over, can I start on Monday?"
"Yes."
"Can you take me to Queens over the weekend so I can stop home and get some clothes and my car?"
"I tell you what. We can go to the mall here in Jersey and get you some clothes for school, and I'll drive you to school Monday. After I pick you up, we can stop by your crib to get whatever you need, and your car."
"Whatever you say."
"Good. I have to head out, but I'll be back later on tonight. Call me if you need anything."
Nichelle did need something, and his name was Renny O'Neal. It blew her mind how she went from crying over Carmelo, to dreaming about falling asleep in Renny's arms. But she felt like the tables had turned, and Renny was no longer sexually attracted to her, and only thought of her as a pet project he needed to salvage. Now that she found herself falling for him, she no longer wanted to be just friends. She craved so much more.
Knock... Knock ... Knock
"Who is it?"
"It's me, Ms. Martin," Tierra said, starting to feel like a stalker.
"Just a minute." Tierra could hear Ms. Martin, unbolting the lock and chain so she could open the door. "Good morning, Tierra, and no, Nichelle ain't come home yet."
"Have you spoken to her again?"
"Yes, she called a few days ago."
"Did you tell her I said to call me?"
"Yes, I did, but I assume she still hasn't called you. I'm sorry, but I think she's going through a rough time and wants to be left alone. She won't even tell me where or who she's staying with. The only reason she's probably calling me is so I know she's safe, and I don't file a missing person report."
"I don't understand why she hasn't called me. Next time you speak to her, tell her to please call. Tell her I won't ask her a whole bunch of questions, I just want to know how she's doing."
"I will, Tierra. I don't mean to rush you off, but I have to get ready for work. You take care now."
No more than five minutes after Ms. Martin closed the door and started to get dressed, she heard the phone ringing. "Hello."
"Hey, Ma, it's me."
"Baby, how a
re you?"
"Okay. I'm coming home Monday."
"For good, I hope."
"No. I'm coming to get some clothes and my car. I'm gonna stay where I've been for a little while longer, but I am going back to school."
"It's good to hear you're going back to school, but why ain't you coming home, and who are you staying with?"
"Where I am, it's better for me... no drama. But, if you're home on Monday after I get out of school, maybe you can meet the person I'm staying with, and you'll feel more at ease."
"I haven't seen you in weeks Nichelle. I'll be here Monday."
"Okay. I love you, and I'll see you then."
"Love you too...oh wait, Nichelle!" Ms. Martin yelled out, trying to catch Nichelle before she hung up the phone.
"Yes?"
"Tierra left here a few minutes ago, looking for you again. Please call her, she's worried about you and I'm tired of her knocking on my door every other day to see if I spoke to you."
"Okay, I'll call her today."
"You promise?"
"Yes, I promise."
"Good. See you on Monday."
As Tierra walked to the beauty salon, she was still pissed about her conversation with Ms. Martin. It angered her that Nichelle had gone missing, and hadn't bothered to call her. They were supposed to be best friends. And not only that, Tierra was concerned about her pregnancy. She wanted to make sure that she and the baby were alright. With each passing day, Tierra was becoming more worried, but she decided she would figure out what to do later, because right now, she had to get her hair done.
"Hey, Charlene," Tierra waved to her hairdresser when she walked in. For a Thursday morning, it was already packed, but Tierra remembered it was the first of the month, and everybody was spending their checks.
"Hey, girl, have a seat. I'll be done in a few minutes."
Tierra sat down while Charlene put the finishing touches on a weave. She noticed the Vibe Magazine with Kanye West on the cover in the seat next to her, and decided to pick it up. It was then that she saw Kay Kay getting up from under the dryer. Tierra decided to act like she didn't see her and continue reading her magazine, because she wasn't in the mood for drama. If Kay Kay didn't say anything to her, then she would remain on mute. But of course, when Tierra heard Lerrick's name brought up, she had to listen.