by KC Burn
He ran back to the bathroom for one last look. After those gorgeous roses, Raven wanted to make sure he looked his best. No kilt today, although he’d been sorely tempted. They’d become so much a part of his self-identity, he never thought he looked his best unless he wore one, but tonight was special, and the kilt didn’t fit into his plans.
Raven adjusted the collar of his sapphire dress shirt, checked his eyeliner for smudges, ruthlessly quashed the butterflies that erupted whenever he considered where he hoped the night would go, and went to let Caleb in.
More nervous than he’d been in a while, he wiped slightly damp palms on his charcoal pants before flipping the deadbolt and opening the door.
On the other side, though, was Caleb, smiling, and Raven’s nervousness disappeared. His boyfriend was not only sexy as hell, but he was safe. Of all the things in this world Raven should worry about, Caleb wasn’t one of them. Not when he’d spent the past month getting to know Raven as a person in a way no other man had done before, without any pressure to take things faster than Raven could handle.
Without any words, Caleb moved into his arms and kissed him, warm and sweet and so fucking hot. Raven adored Caleb’s kisses. Loved them, loved Caleb, period. Raven met Caleb’s questing tongue with his own, the soft duel sparking a different sort of flutter in his belly. Between the kiss and the spicy scent of Caleb’s cologne, Raven’s cock was primed to fill, and he pressed his hips into Caleb’s groin. Desire and trust superseded Raven’s fears, and he wanted Caleb without reservations. The unsubtle ridge in Caleb’s pants spoke of an answering desire, and he was a little surprised when Caleb pulled away.
Breathless, he stared into eyes darkened with desire.
“You look incredible.” Caleb’s voice had deepened into an aroused growl, one that Raven had become more and more familiar with each time they’d spent the night together. It was especially shiver inducing right when they woke up and Caleb had to fight to control his morning wood.
“Thanks. And thank you for the roses.”
Caleb’s tanned cheeks darkened just a bit, and Raven almost smiled. It wasn’t often Caleb blushed, and it was only fair, since this relationship had revived Raven’s ability to blush, and he’d been doing so with alarming regularity.
“You’re welcome. I wasn’t sure you’d like them.” Caleb looked away as though embarrassed and tucked his knapsack in the corner by the hall closet. Sure, they’d already discussed Caleb staying over tonight, but the sight of the bag and what it represented never failed to give Raven a little thrill.
“I love them.” Raven swallowed the impulse to add just how he felt about Caleb. It wasn’t something he could admit to, not yet.
Biting his lip, he considered just dragging Caleb into the bedroom.
Caleb drew a finger along Raven’s lower lip. “None of that temptation now. We have reservations.”
“We do? Where?”
That tiny hint of color returned to Caleb’s cheeks, and Raven realized how rarely Caleb made an effort to be romantic. It only reinforced his conviction that what they had was something special.
“Same place we had our first date.”
Raven might just die from the sweetness—and he knew Caleb wouldn’t want to admit how sweet he was—but after years of wading through bitter, Raven was ready to develop a sweet tooth.
“Let’s go. We wouldn’t want to be late.” Raven chanced a quick kiss but pulled back before either of them could be sucked back into the magnetic field of their mutual attraction.
RAVEN LED them into his condo, and as had become their habit, Caleb went into the kitchen to grab a couple of bottles of water. Instead of heading over to the couch and prepping a movie to watch while they cuddled and kissed, Raven stood nervously by the hall leading to his bedroom.
Their anniversary had been everything he could have asked for. Romantic like nothing he’d ever imagined, but also comfortable. Sexy. Intimate. Safe. Above all, he felt safe. And horny. Couldn’t forget that, not even for a minute, it seemed.
Caleb had rounded the corner, heading for the couch, when he realized Raven wasn’t in the normal place. “Is everything okay? If you’re tired, I can just go home tonight.”
Most of Raven’s nerves settled. Caleb had never once pressured him for anything, and knowing that he’d leave on their anniversary if Raven needed him to meant more than he had words for. There were still a few nerves twanging, because this would be the first time a sexual partner saw him naked since the accident. But he slowly came to realize that those nerves would be there whether he had sex tonight or waited another ten years. Only way to get past it was to get it done, and his cock had been begging for Caleb’s touch for days. His own right hand had become a piss-poor substitute.
“I thought… maybe….” When had it become so hard to talk about sex? Tempting though it was to just start kissing Caleb and hope he intuited what Raven wanted, after that incident with his panic attack in the hotel room, he knew Caleb would never just assume sex was on the menu based on nonverbal cues.
Caleb just waited, a bottle of water in each hand. Raven’s cheeks heated, and he took the coward’s way out—for now.
“I’m not tired.” Getting wired, though. He grabbed Caleb’s wrist and dragged him to the bedroom.
His cock—well trained to associate Caleb and the bedroom with fun, even if they didn’t usually take off their clothes—hardened in his pants.
In the room, Raven took the bottles and set them on the nightstand. He didn’t like the overhead light in his room, so he usually left it off, leaving the room lit by a couple of lamps. The soft, amber light was romantic, and Raven couldn’t help but think maybe his scars wouldn’t look nearly as stark as they’d look on film.
Stepping close enough to Caleb to feel his body heat, Raven started unbuttoning Caleb’s shirt. He slid his fingers inside. Either Caleb had a fever, or nerves had chilled Raven’s hands. He was betting on the latter.
Caleb held himself still while Raven stroked his chest, as though afraid if he even breathed too hard he might spook Raven. But Raven wasn’t going to run. He was nervous, yes. More than that, though, was the sense this was right, and he wanted Caleb more than he could remember ever wanting anyone. He pushed Caleb’s shirt completely off, revealing work-hardened muscles. Caleb wasn’t gym-defined, like many of the models he’d filmed with, but he looked delicious regardless.
Raven set his lips against Caleb’s chest, kissing before licking that salty skin, the light dusting of hair rasping across his tongue. There was something odd and yet utterly freeing about having sex without observers. It gave him license to do whatever he wanted. No direction, no worrying about camera angles, just him and Caleb in the comfort of his condo. When having sex with other models, it was sometimes hard to get potential set direction out of his mind, but here, all alone, he was able to let that all go, let the scent, feel, and taste of Caleb fill up his senses.
By the time Raven’s lips met Caleb’s erect nipple, Caleb had gotten rid of Raven’s shirt too, and they were both hard, rocking their hips into each other, the pressure against his cock oh so good, but not enough. Not nearly enough.
Before he could drop to his knees, Caleb guided his face up and kissed him so thoroughly he wondered if he was going to lose it and come in his pants. Kissing was fucking awesome. Caleb pulled away and knelt, resting his fingers at the waistband of Raven’s pants before he even realized what Caleb was doing.
He tensed. Even when he’d been filming, the scripts rarely called for men to kneel before him to suck his cock. He wasn’t exactly a twink, but he played that role in 99 percent of his movies. He’d been the supplicant kneeling before his sexual partner. This was different. This was Caleb, and a man he loved, a man he desired above anyone, was soon going to be confronted with the terrible evidence of his accident. Of his infirmity.
By luck or sheer stubbornness, his cock remained engorged and eager, even if Raven’s heart was fluttering and his palms were sweating. He
clenched his hands into fists, because he wanted this. He wanted to be normal and wasn’t going to push Caleb away, even if there was part of him that wanted, badly, to do just that.
“This okay?” Caleb’s words vibrated with need, want, and tenderness.
“Yes. Please.” Raven could barely believe he was agreeing, but he wanted this even more than it scared him.
Caleb nudged him with his nose, then mouthed him through his pants. He bit his lip against a moan, because he was still a little worried if he opened his mouth, a refusal would come tumbling out.
All too soon and not soon enough, Caleb undid his pants, and Raven’s erection bulged out of the gap, pushing obscenely at the front of his boxer briefs. His pants slid to the floor, pooling around his ankles.
There had been a time when underwear meant tiny little briefs, thongs, and G-strings, but Raven hadn’t been able to wear them since the accident. Aside from the unattractiveness of the starkly visible scars, the edges of the fabric always seemed to rub in an uncomfortable manner, no matter which pair he wore, so he’d graduated to boxer briefs, when he wore underwear at all.
Caleb rubbed a finger over the tip of his cock, the tip damp and sticky with precome that seeped right through the black cotton. Then he moved both hands to the elastic waistband. Raven squeezed his eyes shut as Caleb pulled his underwear down, letting it slide away to join his pants. Raven had never felt more exposed, and he couldn’t bring himself to open his eyes, afraid he’d see disgust in Caleb’s expression.
Something bumped against the head of his cock. Rough and flat and definitely not a tongue or hand. Then a whisper of sensation on his hip while Caleb grabbed his butt cheeks and massaged. Keeping one eye shut, Raven cracked the other open. Caleb kissed and licked at his scars, and Raven had to open both eyes to make sure the visual matched the sensation.
As though he could sense the scrutiny, Caleb glanced up and smiled, lips still touching Raven’s damaged flesh. Nothing in his expression but desire, and the sight of Caleb’s lips so damn close to his cock was a beautiful thing.
“Suck it. Please.” Raven couldn’t keep the desperation completely out of his voice, because he might truly die if he didn’t feel those lips around his dick.
Caleb’s smile grew wicked, and he sank down over Raven’s cock, somehow able to engulf it entirely. Raven’s cock wasn’t very thick, but it was a little longer than average.
“Oh, God, Caleb.” The words came out breathy and broken, and suddenly Raven was on the brink. “Stop, please.”
The speed with which Caleb obeyed eased something deep inside Raven.
“Did I hurt you?”
Raven smiled down at this man who’d filled up the empty spaces in his life with warmth and happiness. “No, but I didn’t want to shoot too soon.” This from a man whose livelihood once depended on not doing so, undone by Caleb’s genuine enjoyment of his body.
Caleb pressed another quick kiss to Raven’s injured left hip and stroked his ass. “I don’t mind.”
“I know, but it’s been so long. I want to savor it.” And he wanted to get fucked, but he was oddly shy about asking. It had been over a year, and he missed it, although he wasn’t quite sure how the mechanics would work without his previous flexibility. “And you’re not even naked yet.”
With another wicked smile, Caleb licked his lips and stood. He took a step back and gave Raven a mini strip show as he stripped out of pants and underwear.
Raven had caught glimpses of Caleb naked as he’d changed on one of their many sleepovers, and he usually slept in his briefs—plain and simple, yes, but never boring basic white. But the sight of Caleb’s strong, brown body, cock full and pointing at him, the tip glistening with precome, made him breathless. In a 110-percent good way.
He lay down on the bed and crooked a finger at Caleb, who joined him there with ego-boosting speed. The feel of being naked in bed with Caleb, skin against skin, cock against cock, made him wonder just how long he was going to be able to savor things before he shot off like fireworks. He reached a hand down and stroked Caleb’s cock, making them both moan. It felt like forever since he’d wrapped his hand around a dick that wasn’t his own, and this one belonged to a man he loved. The fact that it mattered surprised Raven, but in the very best way.
They played with skin and hair, cock and balls, fingers and lips, until Raven was panting and desperate. Caleb slid a finger in his crack and pressed on his hole.
“That?” Caleb asked, voice husky with want.
“Oh, God, yes. That.” Somehow, he’d read Raven’s mind, and however they managed this, Caleb had already proved that slow and gentle could be every bit as sexy as hard and fast.
“Do you have stuff?”
A reasonable question, since Raven had been rocking the celibacy bandwagon for so long. But this decision had been a long time coming, and he’d prepared. “In the drawer.”
Caleb reached over and grabbed the lube and a brand-new box of condoms. Then he maneuvered them so Raven’s back was to Caleb’s chest as they lay on their right sides, similar to the way they spooned when they slept—the position kept pressure off Raven’s hip. With his legs, Caleb nudged Raven’s left knee up, and then he moved slippery fingers in to play with his hole, stretching and sliding.
A lick at the base of his neck, along the spine, split Raven’s focus. Another lick, longer and stronger, had him moaning and shivering. For all the things he’d done, no one had ever licked his back, and he hadn’t known. For fuck’s sake, he hadn’t known how good it felt. Caleb sucked on the skin, hard enough to leave a mark, at the same time sliding three fingers deep into his body, and Raven moaned.
“Caleb, oh Caleb, you have to fuck me now.” His shyness dissolved into needy desperation as he shivered again, clenching his fists into the bedding, trying to stave off orgasm until Caleb slid his fat cock inside.
For an interminable moment, Caleb’s warmth and magic fingers disappeared, but the sound of crinkly foil and the snap of latex meant it wouldn’t be for long.
Then he was back, pushing his cock against his entrance. Caleb slid home as though Raven had been made to fit this one particular cock—romantic whimsy, perhaps, but Raven had never felt so damned good. This position was new to him, and Caleb thrust slowly as his mouth went back to work on Raven’s back. This time, Caleb was free to pinch at his nipples, and Raven’s entire body twitched as he tried to hold on. He was so fucking close the slightest touch to his cock would send him over.
Then Caleb thrust deep, pegging his prostate as he bit down on Raven’s shoulder. He grabbed Raven’s cock, slick with precome, and stroked down. Raven stiffened, and his orgasm exploded out of him, sending stripes of semen across the bed.
Eventually, their breathing slowed, and Caleb pulled out. Raven slumped face forward on the bed, heedless of the wet streaks, while Caleb got rid of the condom.
The bed shifted as Caleb got back in. “Hey. You okay? I didn’t hurt you, did I?”
Raven shifted his hip, his entire body limp and loose, and feeling fucking fine. “Not at all.” He rolled over to face Caleb, and kissed him. “It was perfect.”
“Shower?”
“Yeah, in a minute. I don’t know if I can walk yet.”
Caleb’s answering smile was both smug and bashful. Besides, if they waited a bit to shower, maybe Raven could demonstrate his skill at deep-throating. A hard cock in his mouth was almost as good as one in his ass. Somehow he didn’t think he’d mind letting Caleb see him in the brighter light of the bathroom, although maybe for this first time he’d see about showering by candlelight.
Caleb held him close as they just lay there, breathing each other’s air, and contentment filled Raven. This was what his life had been missing, even if he hadn’t realized it until Caleb had burst into his life.
Chapter SIXTEEN
“DO I look okay?” Despite the fact Raven didn’t know any of Caleb’s family except for Jaime, he still wanted to make a good impression. His black dress sh
irt fit him perfectly, and his kilt was the more understated black and red plaid, rather than his favored Royal Stewart tartan, but still matched the red streaks in his hair. He’d waffled a couple of times since his anniversary date with Caleb, debating the merits of dying his streaks to match his natural black, but in the end it was the memory of Caleb twining the bright red locks around his fingers with a heated expression that was enough to convince him he needed to keep it. Not like he needed to impress Caleb’s family, at least, not as a boyfriend. As Jaime’s “friend,” he had a little more leeway, or so he hoped.
“Dude, I’m almost ready to challenge Caleb to a duel, you’re so hot,” Jaime said with a smile.
Raven couldn’t stop the blush, even though he knew Jaime wasn’t serious about making a play for him. The loyalty and love between the two cousins was unshakeable and glaringly obvious.
“Thanks.” Nerves twisted his stomach, and he prayed he didn’t humiliate himself by throwing up in front of everyone.
“Don’t worry so much. You’ll give yourself wrinkles.”
Raven stared at Jaime. “What?”
“Something my mama used to say. Bullshit, I know, but you really need to relax. The family—they’re good people, not rabid sharks.”
A tiny unexpected laugh escaped at the mental picture. “I’ve never met anyone’s family before.” Even if they didn’t know he’d be there covertly as Caleb’s boyfriend.
“Just remember to breathe. And if you’re truly freaking out, you brought your antianxiety meds, right?”
Those tiny, innocuous pills. Both Jaime and Caleb knew he had them, but he hated having to take them. Not because of the side effects or anything, but because of what they represented: a vulnerability that was out of his control. He hadn’t had to use them since that first day he’d kissed Caleb in the hotel room, but Jaime’s reminder that the prescription bottle, along with his serious painkillers, resided safe in his sporran was almost as comforting as wrapping himself in Caleb’s arms. The knowledge Caleb was here already, as evidenced by his work truck—washed and buffed for the occasion—didn’t hurt, either.