“They did,” she stated. They’d reached the bottom of the steps now, and were starting down the long hallway. “But that’s not why I defected. I thought for certain I was going to die there, out in the middle of Morray. Then the Zane showed up. His ship had gone down as well. We were enemies, and I was afraid. I’d long since lost feeling in my limbs, so all I could do was lie there in the snow, shaking as he and his men approached.
“He gutted the only part of my craft that was still intact, propping it up so that it buffered us from the harsh winds. Then he and his men helped me into a sitting position, and we all huddled together in a desperate attempt to conserve heat. He didn’t ask me if I’d been the one to shoot him down; he didn’t care. He’d seen my ship fall, and they’d had come seeking shelter and help. If they hadn’t, I would have died less than ten minutes later. If he’d done what he’d been trained to do, kill the enemy, I would have died a lot sooner than that. But he didn’t.”
The doorway leading to the last cellblock was before them now, and the Teller paused, turning toward her. “He saved my life. Kept us alive long enough for Kint forces to find us.”
“Delaney?” Ruckus’s call cut off anything she might have said to the Teller about that. He couldn’t see them, but he must have heard them talking.
“When you’re ready, Lissa.” Sanzie bowed her head and turned so her back was to the room, guarding the door.
Delaney opened her mouth but then snapped it shut again. What was there to say?
Pettus and Gibus were curled up on the uncomfortable-looking benches in their cell, but she could see the subtle rise and fall of their chests, so she knew they were sleeping.
Ruckus, on the other hand, was pressed so closely to the barrier between them, it was a wonder he didn’t get electrocuted. His bruises were healing, albeit slowly, but he could open both eyes all the way now, which was something.
“Delaney,” he repeated on a sigh the moment she came into view, a well of tension seeming to drop from his shoulders. His gaze narrowed around her, his spine tensing again as he searched for Trystan.
“He isn’t here,” she told him. “I came with Sanzie.”
“Be careful with her,” he warned. “She’s loyal to the Zane.”
From what Delaney had just gathered, the girl had more than enough reason to be.
“Wait, you mean he actually let you down here to see me without him hovering?” Ruckus tried to make the statement light, but he was only partly successful. He was weary, and there was no way for him to hide that fact, not with the proof written all over his face. “What an idiot.”
“Let’s not talk about him.” She brought herself up as close as she could. “I miss you.”
“Is this the part where we both reach for the glass, pretending our palms can touch?” he asked. “Mariana would get a real kick out of that. I can see her face now, once we’re home and we tell her.”
“She’d yell about how cliché it is,” Delaney agreed, smiling. “And she’d be right.”
He lifted a single shoulder. “I guess it’s a good thing my side of this barrier is electric then, huh? Stops us from being predictable.”
“You don’t have to do that. Be brave. It’s okay if you’re not. I want you to be real, Ruckus.”
He exhaled slowly. “This is difficult. Being—”
“Trapped?” she interrupted teasingly.
“Being away from you,” he corrected her, though he smiled softly. “Now who isn’t being serious? We’re both trying to get through this by using humor, but we can’t keep it up forever, Delaney. With Fawna being the only one on the outside I can trust, I don’t know how we’re going to get out of this.”
“Trystan and I made a deal,” she confessed, forcing herself to hold his gaze while she explained. When the yellow of his iris turned a golden shade, the rim of green widening, she knew he was angry.
“Absolutely not,” he hissed.
“We don’t really have a choice, do we?” she said, trying to calm him down. “At least this way you and the others get to go free”—she swallowed the lump in her throat—“and I’ll follow.”
“You really believe that?” It was clear he did not.
She sighed, suddenly exhausted. “I have to. You’re not here to help me through it this time. This, trusting Trystan will keep his word, that’s what I need to keep me stable. It’s the only thing that’s doing it, in fact.”
“It’s naive, Delaney.”
“I know that.” And she did. “But that doesn’t change anything. He gave me his word, and so long as you’re safe, the rest can be worked out.”
“Delaney—”
“You’ll be out,” she stopped him. “You and Pettus and Gibus and Fawna. That makes four. Between you all, I’m sure you can come up with a better plan, one that doesn’t depend on Trystan keeping his promise.”
Realization dawned on him, and he straightened slightly, searching her expression. She didn’t know what he was hoping to find, but she made sure to keep the determination visible in her eyes.
She wanted to believe Trystan had told her the truth, that he was going to uphold his end of their bargain and let her go once he was guaranteed the crowns, like he wanted. But their conversation last night had really gotten to her, had made her revisit their agreement and the things they’d said.
There was something she was missing, she was sure of it, but until she figured out what that was, keeping Ruckus and herself from both going insane was the best course of action.
“Hoping that once we’re out, we’ll be able to come up with a plan to rescue you,” Ruckus said, “isn’t really a plan at all.”
“I trust you.”
“You trust Trystan as well, apparently.”
“I’m trying here.” She rubbed at her temples, feeling the beginnings of a headache coming on. This wasn’t going the way she’d wanted. “You’re the most important person in my life, Ruckus, and you’re more capable of navigating this world than I am. But you’re in there and I’m out here. I need you to trust me this time. Trust me to save us. Both of us.”
“I’ve always trusted you,” he whispered. “You know that.”
When he’d realized on his ship that he’d had the wrong person, he’d trusted Delaney could convince the Zane anyway. He’d stuck by her when the Basileus and Basilissa had ordered her to continue the ruse, comforted her when she needed it, and backed off when she hadn’t.
Yes, of course he’d always trusted her, even when it made no sense for him to do so, given their stranger status.
Which was why when the guilt came this time, she didn’t shove it down. She let herself feel it. If Ruckus knew about the movie she’d watched with Trystan, about the snowball fight they’d only just had the other day, about all the times she’d let the Zane be sweet to her, soft … What would he say? Would he still trust her?
“I love you,” she told him. Like she’d explained to Trystan, she loved Ruckus in a way she hadn’t known existed before they’d met. That was what mattered, not what she had to do with Trystan to get through this. Anything that took place between the Zane and her did so because she was trying to protect Ruckus and the others.
The way Trystan had looked when he’d spoken of his mother flashed unbidden in her mind, and her heart clenched. In that moment he’d seemed so fragile, like he was back to being that eleven-year-old boy. No one should ever have an experience like that, let alone a child.
He’d opened up to her about it, about what had to be the most painful memory of his life. He’d let her in, and she’d reacted without thinking, holding him, needing to physically be there for him. Convincing herself she’d do it for anyone, and therefore it was okay.
Looking at Ruckus now, she thought maybe she’d been wrong. She never should have touched the Zane, let alone comforted him. Yet she couldn’t be certain that if it all happened again she’d do it differently. A strong part of her feared she wouldn’t, and the other part of her was relieved by the fact tha
t she couldn’t turn back time to find out.
“I love you, too,” Ruckus said, and it was good to hear.
Because at least that was one thing she was certain about.
CHAPTER 20
“You’re going to have to take these three with you.”
Delaney glanced over to the older man standing across the table from her.
True to his word, Trystan had hired her a tutor, a middle-aged Kint named Lockan. He had silver hair and pale pink eyes rimmed in gold, and had spent twenty-some years on Earth, living among humans. After only one lesson, it wasn’t hard to believe he was the Kints’ top expert on all things Earth and, as a bonus, highly skilled with Vakar politics.
“Don’t worry,” Lockan said, noting her slightly panicked expression. “They’re written in English.” He glanced over his shoulder in the direction of the Zane.
Trystan had introduced them about two hours ago, and then had chosen a window seat across the room. There was an open book in his lap he’d seemed engrossed with, but as soon as the tutor looked his way, he gave them his attention.
“You should consider teaching her our written language as well, Zane,” Lockan suggested. Then, before he could get a response, he added, “We’re ready for you now.”
Delaney frowned. She’d thought it odd when Trystan stuck around even though he clearly wasn’t planning on participating. Was there more to this lesson than she’d originally been told? She watched as he set his book aside and rose, making his way toward the table she was seated at.
“Earth politics,” he explained, easily picking up on her silent question. “I’ll be studying that with you.”
“It’s wise for both of you to be well versed in it,” Lockan agreed with a nod, shuffling through a pile of stacked pages in front of him.
Trystan took the chair closest to her, smiling softly. Then a sheet of paper slid across the table to him, and he turned away to read it. His copy was written with strange letters and symbols Delaney couldn’t recognize, which was why she was relieved when she received her own and it was in familiar writing.
“This is the basic syllabus,” Lockan told them. “Feel free to jump ahead in your free time if you’re able.”
Why did Delaney suddenly feel like she was back in high school?
Lockan ran through it with them once and then began that day’s lesson.
Within five minutes it became painfully obvious Trystan actually knew more about how her government worked than she did. She’d hated Civics and Law back at Cymbeline, and had passed with a slightly tarnished C plus, after which she’d promptly forgotten everything she’d learned.
The next few hours passed in a blur, and due to information overload, Delaney barely registered it when their first lesson was over. She said good-bye to Lockan before he exited the room, and began collecting her things, making sure not to forget anything.
“I’m determined to become smarter than you,” she said to Trystan while he waited for her.
Instead of replying, he took the pile of books from her arms and walked to the door, dropping them into the arms of the Teller standing guard there. He gave the man an order about bringing them to Delaney’s room, and then turned back to her with a grin.
“Now that that’s taken care of”—he motioned toward the hall—“shall we?”
They had another meeting with Co Gailie next, and apparently he was eager to get on with it. “When’s your birthday?” she asked as they headed away from the library.
Her first lesson had been about the different and similar holidays between Kint and Vakar. The one that had most stuck out to her was the way they each chose to celebrate birthdays differently.
Back home, birthdays for her had been a big deal to her mom and dad. They’d throw a huge bash and invite the entire town. Of course, the parties had been more for them to impress the neighbors and reestablish themselves in the community, but she’d always had fun anyway.
The Vakar did not throw huge parties. Instead they returned to their childhood homes and spent the day alone with their parents. Apparently it was a way of honoring them, thanking them for their sacrifices and for helping turn the birthday person into who they were. It was sweet, but low-key.
The Kint did the exact opposite. On their birthdays they visited a new destination. That was the only traditional part. Once they got to this place they’d never been before—whether it be a city, a town, or even just part of the town they’d grown up in—they could do whatever they liked.
The whole thing had gotten her curious about Trystan, and how he might choose to spend his birthday. The types of places he’d gone to in the past, and why he’d picked them.
“It’s coming up actually,” he said, as if just recalling. “About a month from now.”
Used to his non-answers, she let it slide. “What are you planning on doing?”
He shrugged his broad shoulders. “I hadn’t thought of it. Something with you, I imagine.”
Delaney looked away, keeping her gaze straight ahead as they turned down another corridor.
They hadn’t spoken about the other night when he’d come to her rooms, and she was grateful.
She didn’t know why she’d felt the need to comfort him. The reason didn’t matter anyway; she’d done it, it was over, and there was no way for her to take it back even if she wanted to.
“Did you understand law 6B12 when Lockan was explaining it to you?” Trystan asked, thankfully pulling her mind back to her studies. A safe topic.
She nodded and began explaining it to him in her own words. When she got a part wrong, he politely corrected her, then allowed her to continue. They passed the rest of the walk this way, so when they came to the doors leading into the conference room, it felt like no time at all had gone by.
Gailie was already standing across the long table, waiting, and she bowed her head when they entered. They took their seats first and she quickly followed, a wide smile stretching across her friendly face.
“We’ve reached the halfway point,” she began excitedly. “How are you both feeling?”
“Confident,” Trystan said, placing his arms on the sides of his chair. The move caused his elbow to brush against Delaney.
“And you, Lissa?”
“Things are going well, thank you.” She tried not to focus on how hot Trystan’s skin was on her own.
“That’s good to hear. Today, to mark the midway point, we’re going to have the Giving.” Gailie folded her hands on the table top before her. “Have you thought of what you want to ask of Delaney, Zane?”
“I have.” His expression gave nothing away.
Delaney glanced between the two of them. “Apologies, but I’m not sure what the Giving is.”
“Of course.” Gailie waved at her. “I’ve purposefully tried not to bombard you with all the steps up front, but obviously you need to know this one now. The Giving is meant to further ensure that you and your partner are at a good place. A place where understanding, trust, and compromise exist.”
Right … No. She schooled her features.
“You will each ask one thing from the other that has to be given. No matter what it is,” Gailie finished.
“Anything?” That seemed too easy. Delaney risked glancing at Trystan out of the corner of her eye.
His were narrowed.
“Anything at all,” she repeated.
If Delaney could ask for anything, that meant she could ask for this whole business to be over with. Was that the real purpose of this exercise? If someone had changed their mind, they got this easy, and discreet, out?
Of course, she’d also have to ask for her friends’ release, which would make two things instead of one. Unless she only asked for them to be released … She nibbled at the inside of her cheek, returning her gaze to Gailie. If she did that, she’d be letting on that Trystan was holding hostages and blackmailing her into all this.
“Whenever you’re ready,” Gailie said to her, indicating she was to go first.
<
br /> “We never selected a Sworn.” A plan was formulating, and Delaney decided to go with it.
Caught off guard, Trystan stiffened in his chair. “I went over the files you selected. I just haven’t found the time to make a permanent choice. I believe Sanzie was at the top of your list?”
By list, he meant the piece of blank paper she’d scrawled Sanzie’s name across and stuck in the top file.
“She was.” She took a breath to calm her nerves, prepared for rejection no matter the rules. “I have another person in mind now.”
“Do tell?” Trystan’s words were forced, and he rested his chin on the palm of one hand. In his eyes, the warning was clear.
“Sanzie should still be made Sworn,” she said, “but as your main guard, not mine.”
“A Sworn is more than a guard,” he corrected. “It’s a commander. They have far more responsibility than just trailing you around.”
He was making a jab at Ruckus, and before she could help it, her expression darkened. It took her a moment to get ahold of herself, to brush the anger off and get them back on track. When she spoke again, there was a heavier note to her tone that was impossible to miss.
“I’m the Lissa of Vakar,” she reminded him. “Therefore, it’s only right that I also have a Vakar guarding me.” She held up a hand when he opened his mouth to argue, seeing the fire in his eyes. “I want Pettus.”
His mouth dropped open and he slammed it shut, blinking at her.
“Sanzie and Pettus can work together, and Pettus is already someone I trust. He’ll do everything he can to keep me safe, and we both know it. Having him visibly with me will also be another indicator to both the Vakar and Kint people that we’ve agreed on this bonding together.”
Trystan thought it over, but with the intense way Gailie was watching the two of them, he couldn’t decline.
“All right,” he finally conceded, though he wasn’t happy about it. “I’ll contact Teller Pettus and have him brought on immediately.”
“Very good.” Gailie clapped her hands, and asked Trystan to take his turn.
Delaney braced herself. She couldn’t even begin to guess what it was he’d ask for, but she couldn’t react.
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