by Amy Marie
I set Hadley’s drink in front of her. “I fail to see how that’s funny,” I state confused. Girls are insane.
“It’s funny because...nevermind.” Hadley waves it off and takes a sip of her hot chocolate. “Mmm.” She moans. “Caramel.”
I sit beside her. “I told you, Spark. I remember everything.”
If I wasn’t looking dead at her I wouldn’t have seen how she faltered for a moment mid-sip. Wendy stands up and excuses herself to help the guys bring the rest of the drinks.
Valerie rests her elbows on the table. She’s a pretty girl. Blonde hair, pretty eyes and desperately in love with Jace. I don’t know why he doesn’t pull his head out of his ass. “So,” she asks Hadley. “Why does he call you Spark?”
Without hesitation Hadley responds, “Because he always knew how to set my body on fire with just the briefest of touches.”
“Damn,” Valerie says. “That’s kinda hot.”
“Excuse us.” I jump up, grabbing Hadley’s hand and pull her along behind me. I’m close to caveman status because I’m just short of throwing her over my shoulder and carrying her.
“Ryder,” she calls out as we round the corner. “You’re taller than me. My legs don’t move that fast.”
I whip around and lift her up behind her thighs. Her legs immediately wrap around me and I push her up against the wall in the darkened hallway. Our faces are inches apart. “You’re teasing me, Hadley, and I’ve had enough.”
Her breath is hot and comes out erratically. “I’m not doing anything,” she whispers.
I lean in brushing my lips along her jawline making her grip around my neck tighten. “The friendly kisses, the winks, the stares and the fact that I can still feel your hands wrapped around my dick are making me come apart.”
“What happens when you come apart, Ryder?”
“This,” I warn before slamming my lips to hers. The kiss is needy and she opens her lips to allow my tongue to slip in. It feels like heaven, almost better than sex. Her tongue collides with mine and I push my growing erection in between her jean clad thighs. She moans into my mouth pushing me to deepen the kiss. We move in sync, our bodies remembering each other from long ago. I rub myself on her again earning me another heated moan. She breaks the kiss, her head falling back onto the wall, and calls out my name. “Ryder, you have to stop,” she begs.
“Why?” I ask peppering kisses down her neck and continue to hit her sweet spot.
“I’m going to come from you dry humping me like a goddamn high schooler.”
I smile and bite her lip. “Under or above clothes, Spark. I don’t care as long as I can still set your body on fire.”
I nip at her earlobe pushing myself relentlessly against her, and it’s enough to make her come undone. She grabs onto the hair at the nape of my neck and pulls. I cover her moans with my mouth and slip my tongue back in. When her body comes down from her orgasm, I lower her feet to the ground. Bliss is written all over her face.
“Oh my God,” she pants clasping at her chest. “What was that?”
“Oh, you know. Just a friendly orgasm,” I say. Shock flashes across her face and I lean down taking another kiss from her.
When Ryder and I walk back to the table all eyes are on us. My cheeks grow hot as I sit in my seat and pick up my cup, taking a sip. His touch is still burning my skin in a trail of fire. I feel embarrassed that I came by just him rubbing himself against me but it felt amazing. I love me some friendly orgasms.
I choke on my hot chocolate at that last thought.
“I’m sorry,” Ryder whispers so only I can hear him. “I didn’t realize your gag reflex was so sensitive.”
“Oh, it’s not,” I say casually as I bring my cup to my mouth again. “I’ve been known to take in much more than that.”
I don’t look but I can feel his stare still on me. I inwardly high five myself for rendering him speechless. He groans and then looks to the rest of the group.
We all fall into comfortable conversation and the boys decide to play air hockey. Valerie joins them leaving me with Wendy. We’ve been getting along great so far but have yet to be left alone. I guess there is no time like the present.
“Hadley,” she calls my name pulling me away from watching them play across the room.
I turn. “Yes.”
“I’m his friend,” she states.
She is beautiful. Her body is svelte and her blonde hair lies perfectly straight. Even underneath all of the winter gear you can still see the nice natural breasts she has. Her perfectly white smile hits her cute dimples and her eyes are a deep puppy dog brown and crystal clear.
I know Ryder says I’m beautiful but I still feel jealous. “Did you sleep together?”
“Yes,” she answers immediately. “Twice. But that was all before you saw him again in November at the other sledding hill. When you stood up and I saw his eyes I knew you were the Hadley. The way he talked about you to me was the same way he was looking at you. Still does.”
“He talked about me?” My heart soars. I didn’t know I was a topic of their conversations.
“All the time.” She leans in to emphasis her answer. “I probably know more about you then you know about yourself.”
“Then why would he sleep with you?”
She lifts her shoulders in a shrug. “Did you think about Ryder while you were with your boyfriend?”
I reflect on that. There were quite a few times where Ryder ran through my mind while I was dating Braden. “That’s different.”
“How? Would it be better if we had been dating?”
I look away. Maybe she is right.
“We were just two people in love with other people, and those two others were sleeping with who they wanted to. We were just vulnerable and needed someone.”
“Do you still need him?” I question, turning my attention back to her to gauge her answer. “In that way I mean?”
“No. I see the way he looks at you and talks about you now and I want for him to be happy. My needs are met elsewhere while I wait.” She looks over at AJ.
“I’m sorry.”
“I’m not. One day he will wake up and realize I’ve been in front of him all along. Maybe you need to realize that too but when you do I swear if you hurt him again I will personally hunt you down.”
“He hurt me first,” I spit out like a two year old.
“Does he know how?”
I shake my head no.
“Lack of communication is the culprit in the majority of misunderstandings. Maybe if you talk to him then he can explain or can ease your mind.”
I nod. “Maybe. I’m just not ready to dig into the past just yet. Things still hurt and I know once I tell him everything there is a chance he might not want me anyways.”
She quirks an eyebrow at me. “Why would he...”
“Ladies, are you ready to go?” AJ asks and I watch as Wendy’s body comes alive with his proximity. I understand how she feels because as soon as Ryder is in front of me mine does too.
I stand up and loop my arm around his. “Ready?” he asks.
“I am.” I smile.
~~
We make it back to Jace’s in record time and we immediately climb back into Ryder’s car. We stopped and had dinner so it’s late and I’m still trying to recuperate from my bout with the flu.
Snow falls as he pulls into my parking lot. Putting the car in park he opens the door motioning for me to wait and runs around the car to open mine. “Thank you, sir.” I curtsy making him chuckle.
He kisses the top of my head. “You’re too cute.”
I place my hand over my heart acting heartbroken. “Just cute? I’d rather be sexy.”
His large hands grip my hips and he pushes me up against his car. “Hadley.” He growls, dipping his head into the curve of my shoulder and nipping at the flesh. “You are nothing short of sexy.”
I whimper as he nips get harder and his hand snakes up my body gripping my hair at the nape of my neck. �
�Oh, God,” I call out into the darkened parking lot.
His grasp tightens, and he pulls my head back giving him unhindered access to my mouth. His lips hover over mine, his stare intense. “I want to come upstairs, Hadley, but I don’t think that is the best idea.”
I frown and he kisses the side of my mouth gently though not making it easier to let him go home right now. “Why not?” I breathe out.
“Because,” he says pulling away slightly. “I see Braden’s car over there and the light in your living room is on.”
I tense up waiting for him to yell, throw a tantrum or demand that he go upstairs and deal with him but all he does is pull me in tight for a hug. “I had a good time today.”
Thinking about all the fun we had I smile up at him. “Me too.”
He releases me and asks that I call once Braden leaves.
As soon as I turn the knob to my apartment door, I hear Ryder’s car pull away and I walk into the dimly lit room. Only the lamps on the end tables are on. Braden is hunched over on the couch, his elbows resting on his knees and his head in his hand. He looks unshowered. I don’t know why he is here but I don’t dare to move or even speak first.
“That was rough,” he finally says and looks up at me. His facial hair is grown out a little bit, the dark color in contrast to his shaggy blond hair.
I cross the room and sit on the chair opposite of the couch feeling at ease enough to do so. “What was?”
He points to the window and yells, “That! Seeing his mother fucking hands on you, Hadley!”
I quickly stand, suddenly feeling very uncomfortable and grab my phone out of my jacket pocket for safety. “Settle down, Braden. Why the hell are you even here?”
He bolts from the couch and stalks towards me, backing me up against the door. My defense training kicks in and I’m ready to knee him in the balls, but his shoulders slump and slams his hand against the wall.
My body settles once he turns around and walks to the couch to pick up a bag I hadn’t seen. “I came to pick my stuff up and talk to you but after what I just saw I have no desire to be in the same room with you anymore. You barely waited a week before you dropped your panties for him, you slut!”
“Get out!” I scream. His words, though caused by pain, truly hurt. I’ve never been called that name before. “Get the fuck out and never come back here again!”
He starts for the door, knocking my lamp over in his wake, but before he leaves he slams what looks to be my key on the table. “Don’t call me when this blows up in your face, Hadley. I could have given you a great life. I was the one who taught you how to trust again after he obliterated you. ME! Good luck with your life.” And with his exit the door slams rattling the paintings on the walls.
I fall to the floor and bring my knees into my chest and start to sob.
He’s right. When he found me I was lost and still broken. He brought me out of the depths of my hurt and anguish. I struggled for five years after I left Ryder under those bleachers to get my life in order. Braden did help me heal, but that doesn’t give him the right to own me or to hurt me. I deserve better than that.
I need a fresh start, a clean cut, and even though Ryder is from my past, I believe he might be a key to my future. I can feel it anytime he is in the room. That pull to him. The one that used to bring out the real Hadley. I want to be her again and Ryder is succeeding in that. But I have secrets. Whether this works out or we just remain friends, he needs to know everything. He deserves to and if I’m ever going to get over the heartbreak he caused me then I have to find out why he disrespected me and our relationship the way he did. His words from that night ring through my head. ‘Been there, done that.’
It’s still tough for me to believe that he said what he did. Even years later, I still remember it like it was yesterday.
Ryder places gentle kisses on my neck as he fumbles with the clasp on my bra. We’re in the trainer room just before his football game. I volunteered to be a student trainer so I can be on the sidelines and help out with the team. It gives me more time to ogle Ryder while he plays. They needed the first-aid kits restocked and so we offered. We definitely didn’t pass up the opportunity for secret alone time. Just as he gives up his bra unclasping mission and decides to pull my right cup down the door slowly starts to open. I push off of him and pretend to look for the Band-Aids while Ryder flips on the lights.
“What are you two doing in here?” A too perfect voice asks.
I turn around finding Bridgette Tate, Ryder’s ex-girlfriend and queen of the cheerleader bitches.
“Just looking for supplies, Bridg. What the hell do you want?” Ryder asks annoyed.
Ever since they broke up last year, she’s always finding a way to be close to him. I wish I could tell her to stay away, and that he is mine, but right now we can’t expose our four month long relationship. But soon enough the world will know that Ryder and I are in love.
“Nothing. I saw you walk in here but I didn’t know she was with you. I just wanted to remind you to call me later, not that you need to be reminded.” She winks at him as she puts her hip out, placing a hand on it.
Bitch.
“I won’t.” He sighs, turning to me and blows an inconspicuous kiss my way before grabbing some supplies and leaving.
I reach up on the shelf grabbing a few more things so it doesn’t look suspicious, dropping all of them on the floor when I find Bridgette still standing there.
“You know it won’t last.” She sneers.
I bend down to pick up the dropped items. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
She kicks a roll of gauze just out of my reach. “He’s just using you.”
The door slams shut behind her. I finally collect everything and walk back through the hallway and towards the field thinking about her words.
After Ryder started pursuing me I wondered if he had ulterior motives. This summer he proved me wrong by constantly going out of his way to show his affection, but the nagging feeling is always there. We spent the summer together experiencing things that we never had before and we fell in love. The night before school started, I finally gave myself to him for the first time. My first time. It was sweet and gentle and he made sure to take good care of me.
I shake her harsh thoughts out of my head and walk up on Ryder and Todd underneath the bleachers before game time, stopping just far away enough so I can listen.
“I’m sure, man,” Ryder says to Todd.
My heart tightens at how sexy his voice is. I want to finish what we started a few minutes ago.
“I just saw both of you go into the training room. Nothing is going on?” Todd’s eyebrows raise in question.
“She’s nothing but trash. Been there, done that. You can have her,” he comments as they walk away out of earshot.
“Told ya,” Bridgette whispers, shouldering past me.
My phone rings in my hand but I ignore it and pull myself up off the floor shaking the memory out of my head. I flip all the locks on the door before stripping myself of my jacket, hat, gloves and boots, dumping them beside the doormat.
My text pings as I walk into my bedroom and I drop it on my nightstand. Once I rid myself of my clothes I climb into the hot shower. When I’ve scrubbed my body and shampooed my hair, I finally allow tears to fall. They fall for the loss of my two year relationship. They fall for the harsh words Braden said to me. They fall in confusion over my feelings for a man who caused me to put a brick wall around my heart. They fall because I know I have to tell Ryder what happened and he might hate me for it and they fall because the memory still stings like a mother fucker.
Cold air fills the shower and I’m startled when the curtain opens slightly. Ryder’s voice instantly calms me down. “Hadley?”
I wipe away the tears though the water cascading down on me hides them but there is no mistaking the bloodshot of my eyes.
Covering my breasts with my hands I turn around. “I’m done. I’m coming out.”
&nbs
p; “Okay.”
When I’m out and dried off, I wrap a towel around me and find Ryder sitting on my bed. He pats the spot next to him. “Come here.”
I comply and allow him to wrap his arms around my body and draw me into him. My wet hair falls onto his shoulder. If it bothers him he doesn’t tell me.
“I’d ask you how you got in here but I figure that you still have Noe’s key,” I say while I pick at my nail beds.
His shoulders bounce with laughter. “I do but I only did it because I was worried. I saw him leave and you didn’t answer your phone.”
I tell him about the confrontation and have to practically hold him down so he wouldn’t go find Braden. Ryder calms down but I’m sure he is probably plotting something for Monday morning.
I get dressed in some shorts and a tank top and crawl into bed. “Do you want me to stay or go?” he asks giving me the option.
My flashback tells me he needs to leave but my ever growing feelings for him tell me I want him to stay.
“Stay please, but I just want to be held,” I tell him.
Standing up he tugs his pants down and pulls his shirt off. It’s the first time I’ve been able to look at him unashamed in a very long time. His six pack ripples down to a patch of happy trail that disappears underneath his boxers. My mouth starts to salivate knowing just how amazing he can make me feel.
Ryder slides into the bed behind me. “Spark. You have to stop staring at me like that. I’m trying to be a gentleman.”
I wiggle back into him to get comfortable. “What if I don’t like it gentle?” I ask trying to sound innocent and inwardly giggling.
I can feel him grow hard against my back. “Go to bed, Had.”
My mind is still reeling and I’m having a hard time falling asleep. I’m not sure if right now is a good time but I decided to try anyways. “Ryder, we need to talk.”
“I know.” He kisses the back of my head. “Tomorrow.”
He starts humming and tension immediately releases from my body. It’s soothing and calm and just what I need right now. Ryder’s humming stops after a few minutes and his breathing deepens. Just as I’m about to fall asleep he utters four words that will keep me awake for the rest of the night. “I love you, Spark.”