“Mikala’s wrong. Leaving is the only answer.”
***
“It’s time I stop relying on public conveyances, or renting horses from inns to get me around Town. I also have a wife that will need to use it on occasion,” Mack had told Gabe that morning. So, they found themselves at Tattersall’s looking at horses. “Do you think Cassie would like that horse?” Mack nodded at a bay.
“Does she ride?”
“I have no idea.”
“Mack, what do you know about your wife?”
“She enjoys writing.”
“That’s what I thought.”
“What?”
“You had better find out what she likes and doesn’t like. Talk to her.”
“We talk.”
“Not about anything that matters, evidently.”
“We talk about the wars and politics.”
“Hell, Mack, you and Liverpool talk about the wars and politics. Do you want to share a bed with him as well?”
“Just say what you mean.”
“If you don’t talk to her, you’re going to lose her.”
“We’re married. She isn’t going anywhere.”
“Have you already forgotten the merry chase Kala led me on, and the consequences that followed? Don’t let that happen to you. Learn from my mistakes, don’t repeat them.”
Mack thought back to last night. Her tears had tumbled the wall he had erected around his heart. The way she had professed herself to be alone had ripped out his soul. Then he had found himself using physical touches to ease her emotional hurts. He had told her to close her eyes, because he could not bear to see the love shining from them. In the end, it hadn’t mattered, because that is exactly what he saw when she opened them upon reaching her climax. And it scared him as nothing ever had before, not even staring down the barrel of a gun.
This woman that he had been forced to marry, loved him. What did that mean? Did he love her? What if he couldn’t love her? After growing up, watching the way Laird McKenzie had used his mother as a rutting beast would use its mate, did he have any tenderness in him, or had the man ruined him for life? Bloody hell, how I hate that man, Mack thought angrily. His thoughts turned back to Cassie. Being in a relationship where she was the only one that felt love would slowly destroy her. She would come to hate him for not being able to feel like she did. Their marriage would implode on itself, destroying them both. They would turn into bitter adversaries that merely tolerated one another, because ending marriages was not done. Dammit, he thought, how did I get myself into this bloody mess?
***
“What do you think?” Mack cautiously asked Cassie as they rolled to a stop in front of a row of townhouses in Golden Square a week later. She had been cold and distant ever since that first night. Each night they would lay in the same bed, but they did not touch. Neither one hardly slept—he stared at the ceiling, and she stared at the wall. Mikala informed him she was not eating either. She had bypassed his command and was wearing those damn black dresses that society dictated people in mourning should wear. She looked like a shell of herself and she kept that gorgeous hair pulled severely up in a knot.
“About what?” she asked blandly.
“The house. The square. Everything.”
“It’s nice,” she shrugged. “Why?”
“This is our new house.”
“Which one?”
“The one on the corner here. It is rather small compared to the fine, large house Gabe and Mikala live in.”
“I suppose,” she managed to get out and make it sound nonchalant. Small? Never in her life had she lived in a house the size of the one looming before her. She was becoming one of those people she wrote articles about. People that forgot there were others suffering in the world. What was she going to do? She couldn’t live here. She could not be mistress to a house this size and the servants. Chang and John were not servants. Well, she did not think of them as such. What am I going to do? she asked, feeling her breath coming in panting gasps. Calm down and stick to your plan. If all goes well, you will not have to even consider living here in a few more days. You can do this.
“Are you all right?”
She could hear the concern in Mack’s voice. She wanted to relish in the heat of his touch on her back, but she stiffened her resolve. He doesn’t love you. Stick to the plan. Everyone will be better off in the end. “I’m fine,” she forced a smile on her face. “Are you going to show me the house?”
“Allow me,” he held his arm out to her. “Grandmother deeded this house and one in the country over to me. I never thought I would want either one or have a use for them. Funny that.”
“Yes.”
It took almost an hour to tour the house. She was introduced to the servants and them to her. Her head spun with the names and all she had seen. Cassie had never lived in a house so fine in her life. She bit her lip and rubbed her hand along her upper arm where goosebumps had popped up.
“Well?”
Remain distant, she coached herself. He doesn’t love you, and you need to protect your heart so that he cannot harm it any more than he already has. “As I said, it’s nice. Quite a step up from your previous residence.”
“Aye.”
“Can we afford all the staff?”
“That’s what you have to say about it?” he asked.
“It’s a normal concern for a wife, isn’t it?”
“Yes, we can afford it. We’re not destitute. The government pays me well for what I do.”
“That is a relief. When do we move in?”
“Right now. Mikala is having your clothes packed up. The rest will be delivered here when the seamstress is done.”
“Thank you.”
“Dammit, Cassie, talk to me.”
“I’m tired. I think I’ll go lay down for a bit.” She felt his firm grasp on her upper arm and turned to look at him. “Yes?”
“Cassie, I—”
“Don’t say anything you don’t mean, Mack. Respect me enough to at least do that. You need to go to work. The country needs you.”
“What about you, Cassie? Who do you need?”
“No one,” she gave him a sad, lopsided grin. “I never have.” They stood staring at each other for several tense moments before she felt him release her arm.
“I’ll see you when I get home.”
“Of course.”
***
When Mack arrived home, it was to a dark house. His meetings had run long and things were developing at an insane rate in the war against Bonaparte. He had yet to know how things were going in America. It was difficult to be an ocean away from the battles. Cassie must have gone to bed without him. Cassie. Mack’s body ached for her touch. He had gone five, long, interminable days without her touch.
He walked up the stairs, using the bannister for assistance, exhausted from his day. Mack entered the suite of bedrooms set aside for the master of the house. He tried to remain quiet as he removed his boots and clothes so as not to disturb Cassie. He climbed into the bed and rolled over, to pull her into his arms, determined to start anew, but his arms came up empty.
“What the bloody hell?” he muttered. He looked at the connecting door and crossed the room, yanking it open. There in the bed was a slight lump. “I’m too bloody tired to deal with this tonight,” he muttered and slammed the door shut before returning to his bed. He tried to sleep but found it difficult.
He got up irritable the next morning. John showed up to help him dress and remained silent sensing the mood Mack was in. He went downstairs and walked down the hall, peeking in several rooms until he came to a small breakfast room where Cassie already sat, nibbling at a piece of buttered toast. It would take him some time to get used to this new house and where all the rooms were situated.
“Good morning,” Cassie said.
“Good morn,” he replied.
“Sleep well?”
“Like a bairn. Aren’t you going to eat more than that?” he asked, nodding at t
he toast.
“I don’t have much of an appetite.”
“We’ve been invited to a party. Lord Bathurst and his wife are giving it.”
“I’m sorry, but I can’t attend. I’m in mourning.”
“Of course you’ll attend.”
“No, I won’t,” she said stubbornly.
“Cassie, there are some things that we have to get straight, and the best time seems to be now. Bathurst is my superior, and he expects my wife to accompany me, which you will. He knows about your father. I made sure there was a gown made in a deep blue that you can wear to gatherings such as these. There are certain expectations put upon me because of my position and as my wife, you will also have duties to fulfill. Do we understand one another?”
“Perfectly,” she gritted between her teeth.
“Excellent. The party is in two days. Be ready by seven o’clock.”
“And if I’m not?” She couldn’t help but throw the words in his face, despite what she had promised moments ago.
He leaned down, one hand on the back of her chair and one on the table. “You don’t want to see what I will do,” he growled. He moved towards her, kissing her until her lips parted, letting him in. Mack thoroughly swept the recesses of her her mouth before he pulled away. “I have to go.” He turned and left the room, his boots filling the house with a tattoo sound.
Mack went to the mews and requested his horse be readied. It was odd to have servants, to have a horse, and to live in a house this grand. The house size provided Cassie with every excuse in the world to stay away from him. He could still taste her on his lips. Mack felt his body reacting to her lingering taste and smell. He ached just thinking about her. “Stop this,” he ordered himself.
“Pardon, sir?” the lad leading the gelding out of the stables asked.
“Nothing. Thank you.”
“Yes, sir.”
“If Mrs. McKenzie asks to use the carriage or go for a ride on the bay, you are to tell her that it won’t be possible today. And please tell the butler that he is not to call for any conveyance on her behalf otherwise he will find himself looking elsewhere for employment.”
“Yes, sir.”
“One more thing. Tell John and Chang if my wife leaves the house, they are to follow her.”
“Yes, sir.”
“Good man,” Mack said before using the block to mount the horse.
***
Cassie waited for Mack. She was not just angry, she boiled with rage. Mack as good as imprisoned her in this lonely house. At first she tried to write articles, but she found she could not concentrate. Then she turned to her novel, which just irritated and frustrated her. She found herself plotting ways to maim or kill the hero instead of trying to pair him with the heroine. In a bout of frustration, she stabbed her pen into the desktop, snapping off the end.
When she could not concentrate enough to write, read, or anything else, she left for a walk around the square. Halfway down the first street, she felt as if she were being watched. Prepared for a fight, she turned around to find both Chang and Bartlett following her. Irritated, she returned to the house and went behind it to the mews.
“I want the horse or carriage readied for me immediately.”
“I’m sorry, Mrs. McKenzie, but they are unavailable today.”
“I see. And what of tomorrow?”
“That remains to be seen.”
“You mean you haven’t received your orders from my husband yet, is that correct?”
“I couldn’t say, ma’am.”
She stormed into the house and found Chilton, their butler. “Chilton, I want a hack called for me.”
“I’m sorry, ma’am, but that will be impossible.”
She attempted to return to her writing, but all she could think about was how Mack forced her to live the life of a criminal when she had committed no crime. Twilight came and went when she heard a door open in the back of the house. A lantern lit the luxurious wood paneled study, which had quickly become her favorite place in the entire house. Her husband’s booted footsteps could be heard in the hall. The stairs for the bedrooms lay across from the study, so he could not miss her sitting there, waiting for him.
“Decide to wait up for me tonight?”
“Yes.”
“I knew you’d come around. You just needed a little time.”
“Oh?”
“Aye. Come, let’s go to bed.”
“Tell me, do most jailers sleep with their prisoners?”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“That’s what I am, aren’t I? I can’t have the coach or horse readied. I can’t have a hack called for. If I step foot outside the house I have not one, but two shadows. What did you do, Mack, threaten their jobs?”
“Aye.”
“Damn you.”
“It’s for your own bloody protection.”
“My protection? I’m not the one being threatened! Don’t you understand? You can strategize for an entire war, but you can’t seem to understand the nuances of this insane person who has interfered in my life. They don’t care about me, they are after you. You, Chang, Bartlett, Gabe, Mikala, and Diana are the ones in danger. You all are the ones that need the bloody protection!”
“I can take care of myself.”
“Great. And what of everyone else? I’ve already watched one person that I lo…that I care about die at the hands of this mad man. I’ll be damned if I stay around to watch the same thing happen to you or any of the others.”
“You owe me that party. Besides, every member of this staff has their eyes on you. You’re not going anywhere, and if you do get past them, I will fire every last one of them, including Chang and Bartlett. Then, Cassie darlin’, I will find you, and you will rue the day you ever met me.”
“You’re just ruthless enough, I believe you would.”
“Test me.”
“And to think I thought I—”
“Save it,” he ordered.
“I hate you, Stuart McKenzie,” she seethed. “You are a heartless arse,” tears of anger filled her eyes, threatening to spill.
“Good, let’s keep it that way, and I believe the term you are looking for is bastard.” The word rolled off his tongue like a gentle caress, reminding both of them of who he was and where he came from, and that he believed he would never be good enough for the likes of the woman standing across from him.
“Go to Hell!” Cassie rushed past him and raced up the stairs to the room she had occupied last night.
She missed his tortured response to her edict, “I am already there.”
Chapter 26
Cassie remained in her room all night and all the next day. Before he left for work, Mack knocked on the connecting door, but found it locked.
“Cassie.” Silence. “Be ready when I get home, or I swear right now that I will dress you myself. Do you ken?” More silence. “I’ll break down this bloody door right now—”
“Fine,” she bit out, angrily. She found she could hardly eat, her nerves were so rattled and her stomach churned. Late in the afternoon she called for a maid to help her dress her hair and put on her gown.
“The master left these for you to wear this evening.”
Cassie opened the box to find a pair of sapphire and diamond earrings as well as a necklace that matched her wedding ring.
“Oh, my, they’re gorgeous, ma’am.”
“I can’t wear them.” She snapped the lid closed.
“Oh, but you must. You’ll be the envy of all the women there. Here, let me help you.”
Cassie found she lacked the strength of will to fight the bubbly maid. When she looked in the mirror, she felt awed. Despite the somber color of the dress, she still felt beautiful. Damn him, she thought as she tugged on her white gloves. Only a bit of the puckered skin from her bullet wound showed.
A knock sounded on the hall door of her bedroom and when the maid answered, Mack stood on the other side dressed in his finery. She felt his gaze
taking in every aspect of her, from the slippers that peeked out from beneath the dress, to the jewels, and finally to her hair.
“Sweet Cassie, you’re truly breathtaking.”
“Let’s just get this over with, shall we?” she asked caustically.
“Of course,” he replied stiltedly.
She led the way downstairs and waited while the butler retrieved her light cloak. Fall teased them, allowing some warm days still, but heralding in chilly nights. Mack placed the cloak on her shoulders, and she stiffened at his touch. They stepped outside and entered their new carriage. If they were not fighting, Cassie would have told Mack how well he had done choosing the coach and horseflesh. She had ridden quite often along the sandy beaches of her home before moving to London and missed that feeling of being free. The equipage was also very well sprung, not rough like rented hacks tended to be, but she refused to tell him any of this because they were warden and inmate at the moment. Admitting that he had done anything well at this point would be a monumental mistake. Instead, she played with the gloves on her hands, fiddling with buttons, smoothing invisible wrinkles, anything to not meet the eyes that she could feel perusing her body.
“Are we going to spend the rest of our lives avoiding one another?”
“I believe that is a question you need to answer,” she said before the carriage jarred to a halt. “It looks as if we have arrived.”
“So it does. Shall we?” Mack emerged from the carriage and held out his arm to Cassie. It looked as if this would be a large gathering from the flow of carriages and the throng of people waiting to be admitted. Mack could feel Cassie’s tenseness through her grip on his arm.
“Relax, Cassie darlin’.”
“I’m fine,” she gritted between her teeth, keeping a smile pasted on her face.
They entered the large, brightly lit house and joined the line of people. It seemed forever before they reached the head of the line in order to greet their hosts. Cassie curtsied respectfully in the presence of Lord and Lady Bathurst, while Mack bowed.
Seducing the Ruthless Rogue Page 29