"You've just been meeting the wrong guys," Nate explained. "I'm not like them, even if they do call themselves Christians. You should have hit them with a couple of Scriptures—maybe the whole Bible—and pointed them to the altar."
CeCe relaxed against him. They'd made it through the discussion. "I guess that would be one way to deal with the problem. Too bad I didn't think of it." Then she yawned. "Uh—excuse me."
"I guess that's my cue to hit the road. It's late, and we both have early days tomorrow. Would you like to pray together before I leave?"
CeCe felt her heart race. "Yes, I'd like that."
He took both her hands in his. "Any special requests?"
"Just Shay and Marvin."
Nate held her hands firmly as he petitioned the Father on their behalf. This was a brand-new experience for CeCe. She'd never gone out with anybody who wanted to pray with her. Maybe Nate was right. She'd definitely been meeting the wrong guys.
"Father, we ask that you bless our friendship. Show us how to support each other, care for each other, and build each other up. Direct our relationship in the way that you want it to go. We ask a special prayer for Shay and Marvin. We thank you for the healing work you've done in their hearts, Lord, and we pray that we don't get in the way of your continued work. Show us how we can love them and support them the way you want them to be loved and supported. We love you, Lord, and we thank you for loving us. In Jesus' name. Amen."
CeCe murmured an amen, then found herself being pulled up from the swing. Nate placed a soft kiss on her cheek as he'd done after the Gala and earlier today at the ballpark, and then he was gone. She entered the house wondering how it would feel to kiss him on his lips.
Chapter 9
CeCe was both excited and anxious as Nate drove her and David to Shay and Marvin's for a Saturday afternoon cookout. Today marked six weeks since she and Nate had attended the Gala together. Since then he had become a vital part of her life. She was used to being with him, and his presence gave her a sense of security. She no longer worried about what people would say about them. Nate's friends and fellow church members had been nothing but gracious to her. Like Shay and Anna Mae, they cared about Nate and were happy to see him come out of his shell. Of course, she'd caught a couple of disappointed glares when they'd gone to the gospel concert some weeks back, but she understood how losing out on Nate could negatively impact any woman's disposition.
"What are you smiling about?" Nate asked.
CeCe hadn't realized she was smiling. "Just happy thoughts," she said evasively. "I'm excited about spending this time with Shay and Marvin. It's hard to believe I've known Shay for only a couple of months and already I consider her one of my closest friends. She's been a great help to me and Anna Mae with the workshops, and I really enjoy her company."
"You've been good for her, CeCe. You and Anna Mae both. You two were right there when Shay decided to reach out. I thank God for you both."
Though she should be used to it by now, Nate's praise still caught her off guard. He valued her as a person and as a sister in Christ. She hadn't known how hungry she was for that kind of affirmation. "I think the three of us have helped each other. I thank God for bringing us together, too. I also thank him for allowing David and me to get to know you."
Nate didn't say anything, but CeCe knew him well enough now to know that the quiet smile on his face meant that her words had affected him deeply. "You don't think having David around is going to be too much for them, do you?" That question had been on her mind off and on since Shay had issued the invitation. She'd asked her friend straight-out if she would prefer they left David home, and Shay had assured her that she wanted the child to come. CeCe still wasn't sure.
"I think it'll be fine," Nate said, his eyes on the road. "If they can handle Little League games, they can handle an afternoon with David. I've been thinking that we've made it too easy for Marvin and Shay to shut themselves off. We shouldn't have allowed them to withdraw from us the way they have. I'll always regret that."
She smiled at him. If he could, Nate would take care of everybody he knew and probably quite a few people he didn't know. That's why the work at Genesis House was so good for him. Though he never talked about it, she knew he worked long hours. Not on the official Genesis House business of soliciting funds to carry out their programs, but with the personal caring for the people he served. "You can't control the world, Nate. You and everybody else did what you thought was best. Leave the rest to God."
"Are we there yet?" David called from the backseat.
"Sure are, sport," Nate said as he pulled into Shay and Marvin's driveway. As he opened his door, he said to CeCe, "I'll get David. You can head for the door."
Leaving Nate to unbuckle David's seat belt and assist him out of the car, CeCe headed for the door. Shay opened it before she had a chance to knock.
"It's about time you got here," Shay said, with a bit too much cheer. CeCe immediately suspected all was not well. "We've been looking out for you."
"Is everything all right, Shay?" CeCe asked, concerned about her friend. "If this isn't a good time—"
"Nonsense. Come on in." Shay took her hand and pulled her into the two-story foyer just as Nate and David came up behind her. Shay released CeCe and turned to Nate and David. "Hi, you," she said to Nate. To David she said, "I'm glad you could come, David. Why don't you get Nate to take you out back? There's a surprise out there for you."
"For me?" David asked, his eyes wide with childish wonder. He looked up at Nate.
"You don't even have to ask," Nate said to the boy. "I get the feeling they want to get rid of us anyway. Come on, sport." He picked David up, settled him on his shoulders, and headed toward the rear of the house.
"Tell me what's wrong, Shay," CeCe said as soon as Nate and David were out of hearing distance. She took her friend's hand. "I want to help if you'll let me."
Shay shook her head. "You can't help, CeCe. This is between Marvin and me. Things can't go on as they are. Something has to give."
"What happened? Did you two have a fight?"
Shay squeezed CeCe's fingers and led her to the white, overstuffed sofa that dominated the living room. "I know you want to help and I love you for it, but believe me when I tell you there's nothing you can do. Right now, it's up to Marvin and me. We're either going to make it through this together, or I'm going to make it by myself."
All sorts of thoughts ran through CeCe's mind—none of them good. "Shay, you can't mean—"
Shay nodded her head in the affirmative. "I do so mean. I've loved Marvin since the day I met him. There was never a doubt in my mind that God had picked him especially for me. I still believe that, but right now we're not helping each other. We're bringing each other down. Something has to give." She took a deep breath and looked directly into CeCe's eyes. "Now I'm going to ask you to do something for me."
"Anything," CeCe said with all sincerity.
"OK, I want you to drop this subject and try to enjoy yourself today. I may look a little worse for the wear right now, but I promise you that I'm better than I've been in a long time. And I'm getting better every day. I can see God again, CeCe. There was a time when I didn't think I'd be able to see him." Shay stopped as her eyes filled with tears. "I can see him in you, in Nate, and I can even see him in me. That's the miracle. I can see him in me."
CeCe pulled her friend into her arms and hugged her close. "I've known you such a short time, Shay, but you've become very dear to me. I'm going to do what you want and enjoy myself today, but first you're going to have to give me a couple of minutes of crying time. Can you do that?" CeCe felt her friend's nod against her shoulder. "Good," she said, letting her tears fall.
* * *
Nate had picked up on Shay's discomfort as soon as he'd looked into her eyes. Now he didn't know what to expect when he saw Marvin. He hoped his friend was in good shape because he didn't want David exposed to anything negative. The boy had come to mean a lot to him, just as his mothe
r had. Nate was protective of both of them. A part of him knew that Shay would never have allowed him to bring David out here if Marvin was in bad shape, but that didn't ease his anxiety.
"Hey, buddy," Nate called, grateful to see his friend standing at the grill. "You're looking good in that apron, my man."
"Just part of the job." Marvin waved his metal spatula. "Hiya, David. It's good to see you again. Did you enjoy the ball game last Saturday?" Nate had taken the child and his mother to several games since that first one, and last Saturday he and David had gone alone because CeCe had an appointment to show a house.
Nate set David down from his shoulders, and the tyke ran and stood next to Marvin. He began chattering about the game. "Where's my surprise?" he finally asked. Nate had begun to wonder if he'd forgotten.
"What surprise?" Marvin asked in mock ignorance.
"Miss Shay said you had a surprise for me."
Marvin rubbed his chin. "A surprise for you. Let me think. I wonder what she was talking about." He looked over at Nate. "Do you know what she was talking about, Nate?"
Nate shook his head. "Not me. I want to see this surprise myself."
David looked from Marvin to Nate and back to Marvin again, his eyes showing his concern about the misplaced surprise. "Don't you know about the surprise, Mr. Marvin? Miss Shay said you did."
Marvin lowered his hand from his chin and snapped his fingers. "Oh, I think I know what she was talking about." He handed his spatula to Nate and winked. "Don't let the burgers burn. I've got to go show a surprise."
Nate chuckled as he took the spatula. "What if I want to see this surprise, too?" he called after the two of them, but neither turned around. Nate wondered what the surprise was as he watched Marvin lead David into the portable storage house he and Marvin had positioned in the backyard about three years ago. His mouth dropped open and tears welled up in his eyes when David zoomed out on a black-and-gold tricycle/go-cart. Marvin had done it. He'd finished the go-cart that he and Marvin Jr. had started building together. Thank you, Lord, Nate murmured to himself. He's turning the corner.
Nate continued watching as Marvin instructed David on the use of the go-cart. Once the little boy got a handle on it, he shot off again. "Look at me, Mr. Nate," he yelled across the yard. "I'm driving."
"I see you," Nate yelled back. Then he turned back to the grill and tried to get his emotions back in check.
"Hey," Marvin said, snatching the spatula back from him.
"I thought I told you not to let the burgers burn. You've been off your job. Look at that one there. I guess you'll have to eat it."
Nate looked down at the well-done burger and shook his head, almost back in control. "I'm sure I won't." He glanced back to make sure all was well with David, then turned to his friend. "Thank you for letting David play with the cart. I know how much it means to you."
"It's just a cart," Marvin said, his eyes focused on the meat on the grill.
Nate knew it was much more. That cart was a symbol of the relationship Marvin had shared with his son. His friend had been an excellent father. He'd had so much love for his boy, and that love had spilled over to every other boy he'd come across. That's the kind of man Marvin had been. The kind of man Nate hoped he'd become again.
"You're thinking too much, Richardson," Marvin said. "It's a bad trait."
Nate eased down into one of the patio chairs near the grill. "I know, but I can't help it."
"How are things with you and CeCe?" his friend asked.
That question caused Nate's face to split into a wide smile. "Good. Very good, in fact. How are things with you and Shay?"
Marvin took the burgers off the grill and added more. "They could be better. Then again, they've been worse. You know, sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night and just lie there looking at her. I love her so much that it scares me. How can I let myself love her that much? What if I lose her, too? I don't think I could live through it, Nate. I don't."
"Have you talked to Shay about this?"
He shook his head. "I can't. I can't talk to her about anything. I don't want to hurt her, but everything I do these days seems to hurt her. Sometimes I think she'd be better off without me."
"You don't mean that," Nate said. He didn't like the way his friend was talking.
Marvin gave Nate a look that let him know he did mean it. "Don't you think I can see that she's getting better? I see the life in her. The life that drew me to her initially. But now it repels me. I can hardly stand it. I love her more than I love my own life, but I can't be in her presence for more than fifteen minutes before I start feeling as though I'm suffocating. What do you have to say to that?"
Fear snaked up Nate's spine as he considered the implications of his friend's words. "I say that you have a choice. You can tell Shay how you feel and share your pain, or you can continue to let thoughts like the ones you're having now rule your mind. But I'm telling you, Marvin, if you choose the latter, you're going to lose everything that's important to you."
David chose that moment to zoom by in the go-cart. "Look at me, Mama," he said as he breezed by.
Nate turned and saw CeCe and Shay coming their way. Shay looked a lot better now than she had when they'd arrived. CeCe, on the other hand, looked worse. Talk about a woman who wore her heart on her sleeve. That was his CeCe. And she thought she was tough. He laughed aloud.
"What's so funny, Nate?" Shay asked, taking the seat across from him. To his delight, CeCe took the patio chair next to him.
"Just thinking about my good fortune," he said, with a pointed look at CeCe. If her complexion had been lighter, he was sure he would have seen her blush.
"Will wonders never cease," Shay said in an exaggerated drawl. "A man who knows the value of what he has. I can't remember the last time I ran across one of you."
Nate's glance shot to Shay, who had directed her attention to Marvin. Was she deliberately baiting her husband? Nate wondered. If she was, the look on Marvin's face said he didn't appreciate it.
"David's enjoying his surprise," Nate said, hoping to lower the tension between his friends. It worked; Shay turned her attention back to him.
"Marvin did a great job with it, didn't he?" Shay watched her husband, her eyes full of love. "I'm always telling my husband that he can do anything he wants to do. He just has to want to do it."
Nate shot a second glance at Marvin, then one at CeCe. She took his hand and stood up. "Come on. I want to see this surprise up close," she said.
Nate didn't move immediately. He knew that CeCe was trying to give Marvin and Shay some time alone, but he wasn't sure that was a good idea. Shay seemed to be baiting Marvin, and given his friend's current state of mind, Nate thought she couldn't have picked a worse time.
"Come on," CeCe coaxed, tugging on his hand. "I have a feeling my son is going to be wanting a go-cart of his own. And guess who's going to have to build it?"
"You?" Nate asked, getting up. He'd decided to follow CeCe's lead and leave his friends alone.
"You've got it. And I'm sure I'm going to need some help."
"From me?"
"Give that man a cigar."
Nate chuckled as she led him away from the tempest brewing between his friends. They'd gone from silence to verbal banter. He prayed it signaled progress.
* * *
Later that night CeCe and Nate completed the ritual that had become theirs. They settled David into bed, spent some time with Miss Brinson, and then sat on the porch swing and enjoyed each other's company. "What's on your mind tonight?" Nate asked.'
"Shay and Marvin. What's on your mind?"
"The same thing. They're not out of the woods yet, but they're getting there, I think. I pray."
CeCe remembered the way Nate had tried to referee the couple's budding argument, evidence of his concern for them. "Shay seems to think things may get worse before they get better. She's determined to move forward, preferably with Marvin."
"Preferably?" Nate repeated.
&
nbsp; "Her words. Not mine."
"Do you think she's considering leaving him?"
CeCe sensed the change in Nate; she knew he was thinking about himself and Naomi. In a perfect world—in a world where God's creation was perfectly obedient to him—Nate and Naomi would be together. Sometimes she wondered about the hold the past had on him. He didn't carry any banners to indicate his hurt, but CeCe felt it in his interaction with her. She knew his cautiousness and his care with her were a result of his past pain. "I don't think she's thinking about leaving him, but I do think she realizes that she has to be willing to give him up if they are to have any chance of coming out of this whole—and together."
Nate didn't say anything, and she wondered if he'd even heard her. As she looked at his profile, her heart hurt. Lord, I said I wanted to be his friend, but I'm coming to care for him as more than a friend. How will I handle it if he can never feel more for me?
"Did I ever tell you that I used to pray for a marriage as solid as Shay and Marvin's? I wanted a woman who'd suit me as well as Shay suits Marvin."
CeCe heard the fear and the pain in his voice, and wanted to comfort him. "They're going to be all right, Nate. We have to believe that."
"Sometimes things don't end up all right, CeCe. It takes two people to make a relationship work. Two people who want the same thing and who are pulling in the same direction. Sometimes one person has to carry the load for both of them, and the Lord will give that one the strength he or she needs to do it for as long as necessary. But when people leave and start lives separate from each other, the situation becomes more difficult. Not impossible, but much more difficult."
CeCe knew he was speaking from experience, and a part of her wanted to strangle the woman who'd caused him such pain. "Maybe it won't come to that."
He turned to her and took both her hands in his. "I want you to promise me something, CeCe. Promise me that you won't run away if things between us get difficult. Promise me that you'll talk to me, that you won't just leave."
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