“As soon as you graduate, you can move in with me and Jace,” I promised, aching for this school year to go by as quickly. She had just started her summer break before her senior year though, and it was going to be almost a year before she could come live with us.
My door opened and Jace reached in, pulling his sister out of my arms without giving me so much as a warning. Pissed that he had taken her from me, I climbed out of the car and thrust my hands into my jeans pockets as she clung to him. Jace kept his arms around her, rocking her back and forth as he murmured something in her ear. Whatever he was saying only made her start sobbing all over again. The only reason I didn’t punch him in the face was because he was fighting his own tears back.
“Don’t cry,” he finally muttered and stepped back enough to look down at her. “I love you, baby sis. I’ll see you soon.”
She didn’t even seem to hear him as she wrapped her arms around her middle and cried even harder.
I pulled her into my arms, holding her as hard as I dared without hurting her. Closing my eyes so my own tears wouldn’t escape, I pressed my lips to her ear. “Love you, little caterpillar.”
Her nails bit into my skin through my shirt. “Love you more.”
“Not possible,” I whispered and then cleared my throat.
It was time to go. We had to get checked in and through security soon if we wanted to make the plane, but I didn’t have the will to let her go. I could have held her for the rest of the day and not gotten my fill.
Alicia seemed to sense that and pried Kassa away from me. She fell against Alicia with a sob that seemed to come from her soul, and I could have gladly gone down on my knees then and there to make that sound stop. Instead, I picked my carry-on up and forced myself to walk away with Jace.
Before we reached the sliding doors to the airport, I paused and looked back, unable to stop myself from having one last glance at my favorite person in the world. She and Alicia were watching us, both of them crying, but at least Kassa wasn’t nearly bent in half from sobbing now. I waved, and she gave me a smile that trembled, but at least I got a smile.
All the hype I had been feeling about going out to SOCAL to start my career was gone for now. It was hard to think about all the things I had always dreamed of doing with my band when my heart was wet and soggy from Kassa’s tears.
Jace and I didn’t talk much as we went through security. Then he went off to get himself some coffee and something to eat for the trip, but I just stood by our gate, looking out the windows at the planes coming and going. I couldn’t get Kassa’s eyes out of my head. The hauntingly beautiful heartbreak I saw shining out of them had lacerated my heart, and now, it was bleeding into my chest cavity, making it impossible to breathe.
My phone rang, so I pulled it out of my pocket. When I saw her smiling face lighting up my screen, I had to swallow the fresh lump that had filled my throat before I could answer.
“I’m sorry,” she said in a voice that shook before I could even say hello. “I don’t want you to go thinking I’m not happy for you guys. Because I am. I’m so excited for you and Jace and the guys. You’re amazing and I know that everyone will see that and that you really will rule the rock world like Alicia said.”
“Kassa,” I said, trying to interrupt her, but she was talking too fast.
“I promise I won’t cry anymore. I swear it. It was just harder to say goodbye than I thought it would be.” She sucked in a deep breath and then kept going while I leaned my head back and closed my eyes. “You’re my best friend, Gray. I love you. Have a safe flight and call me later. Okay?”
Before I could answer, she hung up. After blowing out a breath, I laughed at the little whirlwind she had just caused in my head and called her back.
“Gray—” she started, but I interrupted her.
“Your tears nearly brought me to my knees,” I confessed. “But that’s nothing new, is it? Your tears have always driven me crazy. That won’t ever change. I miss you already and I haven’t even stepped on the fucking plane yet. I won’t be sane again until I see you, Kassa. I love you—more than anything or anyone. I know the band is going to go places, because hey, I’m just that good.”
She snorted out a small laugh, just as I knew she would at my arrogance.
“But I don’t want this without you,” I said. “I don’t want to have to be away from you. And, if I didn’t have the others counting on me, I would have turned Harris Cutter down until I knew you could come with me.”
“No, Gray. You can’t do that,” she said, trying to chide me, but it was still my turn to talk.
“But the guys are depending on me, and I know that a chance like this probably won’t come around again. So I’ll find a way to manage without you until I see you again. But it’s going to be hard, Kas. You are my best friend. Not Kale or Sin or anyone else. Just you. And, without you, all that shit that tries to haunt me at night? It’s going to try to destroy me.”
“No, it won’t. You’re stronger than you know.” Her voice was quiet and soothing, almost like a caress over my brow.
“Not without you, Kassa. You’re my strength.”
My flight number was called, and I clenched my hand around the phone.
“I have to go, little caterpillar. I’ll call you when we land though. Okay?”
“Yeah, okay,” she murmured. “I love you, Gray.”
“Love you more.”
FIVE
Gray
Alicia had already gotten us an apartment: a three-bedroom in the same building as Harris Cutter. As congratulations for having gotten the contract with him and First Bass, she was paying our rent. Not that I needed her to pay for a place for me to stay. My father had died of a heart attack in prison the same year I had graduated high school. With his death, I had inherited everything.
The house, the money, his business. It was all worth over two million dollars.
I hadn’t touched the money or anything else that came with it though. I didn’t want anything from him. Alicia had been investing it for me though, and so far, she had nearly doubled the inheritance I had been left.
The apartment was huge, with three bedrooms—enough for when Alicia and Kassa came to visit. But I couldn’t wait for Kassa to be living in it full time. It came fully furnished, and the fridge was even stocked when we got there, thanks to Harris Cutter’s stepmother, Natalie.
After some food and a shower, Jace and I got ready to head to the club. Harris was going to show us around, let us get a feel for the place. Sin, Cash, and Kale would be arriving that weekend, but we wouldn’t start until the following Thursday.
First Bass was just starting to take off, but it was the hottest club in Los Angeles, something that was blatantly clear when we arrived just after nine that night. There was a line at least two blocks long to get in. Our taxi pulled up right at the entrance, where two men in suits stood at the front of the roped-off line.
The outside of the club was basically nondescript other than the sign proclaiming that it was First Bass in an edgy kind of script. It had white lighting and a bass guitar underneath the words. I stepped out behind Jace, who was already speaking to one of the bouncers. The man said something into his headset, and after a few seconds, he nodded for us to go on in.
Inside, the music was kick ass, not that fucking techno shit that gave me a headache and sounded like the same damn song over and over again. It was rock at its finest, old school and loud as fuck. I was in heaven and I hadn’t even walked two feet into the club yet.
There was a long corridor that led to the bottom floor, but in an alcove practically hidden in the dim lighting stood perhaps the biggest man I had ever set eyes on. I enjoyed my time at the gym, so I figured that this guy with the dark skin and massive shoulders could bench-press me and all four of my bandmates without breaking a sweat. He stepped into our path as we neared the alcove, a professional look on his face.
“Mr. Knight? Mr. St. Charles?”
We both nodded.
“Uh, thanks…” Jace trailed off, waiting for the guy to give us his name.
“Tiny,” he provided without so much as a flicker of his lashes or a smile.
I had to clench my jaw to keep from laughing. That name was perfect for this man. I couldn’t wait to tell the guys about this dude.
Jace cleared his throat. “Thanks, Tiny.”
I followed Jace up the stairs, where the music wasn’t as loud and the lighting gave the place a kind of anonymity. We stopped not far from the top of the stairs and took the VIP floor in. Despite the lighting, I recognized at least a half-dozen celebrities on the first glance: a list actors and athletes who were worth millions in just endorsements alone. When I noticed a hot brunette watching me, it took a minute to realize where I knew her from.
“That’s a fucking Victoria’s Secret angel,” Jace muttered as the chick walked by. “How the fuck are we in the same club with that chick?”
“Dude, I don’t know, but I’m gonna go talk to her.” I moved to walk around him because she was still giving me that come-fuck-me look, but he grabbed the back of my shirt, stopping me.
“We’re here to talk to Harris, not hook up.” He popped his neck, his face tight, and I wondered if he was missing Kin.
Maybe I should have felt bad for having told him to break it off with her, but we both knew that it was the best thing for him to do. Long-distance relationships didn’t last long. Breaking it off with her would let the chick get over him and move on. Plus, I knew that, if he had to make the decision later down the road rather than before we left, he wouldn’t have picked the band. He would have gone home, tried to make it work with her, and fucked up his music career. I might not have liked him half the time, but I wasn’t about to let him fuck his future up. Jace had a voice that was going to go places. And I selfishly wanted him to go places with Tainted Knights.
I blew out a long sigh and straightened my shirt. “Fine. Whatever. We’ll talk to Harris, and then, when that’s finished, I’m going in search of the VSA.”
He muttered something under his breath, but I chose not to hear it as we took in the rest of the upper floor of the club. There was a bar off to the left that was overflowing with people getting drinks and a single bartender to fill the orders, but even from where I was standing, I could tell he didn’t need any help. He was moving from one end to the other, getting beers and mixing drinks like it was second nature to him.
I was dying for a beer, and so was Jace. Ten minutes later, we had our second beers in hand and I was itching to get this meeting over with so I could find something a hell of a lot more fun than standing around with Jace’s ass. Long leather couches were spread out around the top floor as well as ottomans. Most of them were taken, but there was a group in the back-right corner of the room that caught my eye.
I nudged Jace with my beer. “There’s the new boss.”
He followed my gaze. “That’s fucking Zander Brockman and Liam Bryant with him.”
“Dude, they play with his dad. Did you think they wouldn’t come to his club from time to time?”
He grimaced. “Hell. I’m just nervous. If Axton Cage is back there, I might piss myself.”
I wasn’t about to admit that I was just as nervous. On the inside, I was quaking in my shoes, but on the outside, I was completely calm. Having spent the first twelve years of my life having to pretend like my home life wasn’t a fucked-up, scary nightmare had come in handy for something at least.
Back in Bristol, we were local celebrities, playing at a few of the popular bars in both Virginia and Tennessee. Here, we were nobodies. Yet. I had promised myself that the world would know who Tainted Knights was one day, and this was just the first step to making that promise a reality.
“Let’s go,” Jace muttered, taking a long swallow from his beer to give himself courage.
Like I had been so far that night, I followed after him, letting him take point. Jace was the face of our band. He was the voice and, at times, the sanity. I knew how I was, always running my mouth and getting in trouble. I also knew that if I wanted this career to go anywhere, then I needed to let others do the talking.
Although, if I had to pick between him and Cash getting us out of trouble, I would have picked Cash. The guy could have easily have become a lawyer, followed into the family business, and gone into politics. That wasn’t where his heart was though. But he was back in Virginia, and I was on the other side of the country, so I followed behind Jace.
Harris Cutter spotted us before we’d even reached them. A grin made his dimples pop out, and he stood, ready to shake our hands as we grew closer. The guy was just as tall as I imagined his father was, right at six and a half feet tall, which put him a few inches taller than either me or Jace. He was lean though, just like his dad. Fuck, the dude could have passed for Devlin Cutter’s clone except for his short hair.
“Glad to see you two made it. Everything okay at your apartment?”
“It will do,” Jace said with a grin of his own. “Thank your stepmother for us for the stocked fridge. Pretty sure we would have been living out of cardboard boxes if she hadn’t.”
Harris’s eyes brightened. “I’ll make sure Nat knows her work was appreciated.” He turned to the two rock gods still on the couch in front of him. “Liam, Z, meet Jace St. Charles and Grayson Knight. They are two of the guys from Tainted Knights, the band I hired to play live every Thursday night for the next year.”
“Good to meet you, boys. It takes a lot to impress Harris, so I figure you guys must have some real magic,” Liam Bryant said as he stood, his hand already extended, ink all the way up his arm. His handshake was firm, his eyes clear and focused.
I had heard the stories of how he had once been, before a car wreck had nearly taken his life and he had married Gabriella Moretti. The tabloids still liked to keep an eye on him, but as far as I had seen, he hadn’t slipped back into bad habits.
Jace shrugged, able to hide his nervousness since he was able to talk about the one thing that had saved both of our sanities over the years. “You’ll have to come in one night and check us out.”
“Oh, plan on it,” Zander Brockman said with a chuckle as he shook both of our hands next.
The ink on his hands grabbed my attention, but it was the Anna written across his throat that had always caught my eye whenever I had seen him in OtherWorld’s music videos.
“My wife is always looking for more talent to represent,” he said. “I’m sure she will be dragging me down here sooner or later.”
We sat and then talked for over an hour. Hanging out with two of my idols, talking music and life, laughing and drinking beers with them, was a high I didn’t think any drug could replicate. When Liam got a text from his wife saying his kids were still awake and their daughter wanted him to tuck her in, his entire face changed. He had been laughing and joking around with us, but when he read the text, his face lit up and he got to his feet.
“I hate to bail, but Piper wants her daddy.” Harris stood and hugged the other man. “I’ll see you soon, boy.”
Zander climbed to his feet as well. “I better get back too. My daughter is arriving tomorrow and I need to be up early to meet her at the airport.” He shook our hands again. “Good meeting you, guys. Anna and I will be in soon to check the band out.”
Once they were gone, Harris showed us around the club. The place was huge so it took a while, but I wasn’t as bored as I’d thought I was going to be. I could tell that this was where his passion was, that First Bass meant everything to him. That he was entrusting Tainted Knights to make his successful club even more popular was a compliment all of its own.
When it was over, however, I didn’t sit around and chitchat with him and Jace, who seemed to have become friends in the short time we had all known each other. No, I was more int
erested in what kind of fun the model could offer if she was still around.
I found the brunette at the bar, surrounded by guys trying to talk to her. She looked bored as she forced a smile up at some guy who looked vaguely familiar. I pushed my way up to the bar, a few feet from where she and her pack of horny pricks where.
The bartender stopped in front of me. “Another beer?” he asked, surprising me by remembering what I had ordered earlier. There was no way I could have remembered what anyone had been drinking two hours ago when the place was this packed.
I nodded and he set an uncapped bottle in front of me. Then I tossed him a few bills and turned to watch the model. I was about a third of the way into the beer when she turned her head. Her smile turned from bored to sultry when she saw me standing there with my eyes on her.
Brushing by the guy who had been talking to her like she didn’t hear him, she walked up to me. “I’m Camilla,” she murmured in a thick Brazilian accent.
“Gray.” I nodded toward the exit. “Ready to get out of here?”
“I was hoping you would ask that.” She lifted a hand to touch my chest, but I caught it before she could make contact. “My place or yours?”
I didn’t care whose bed we ended up in. All I wanted was to blow off some steam and have a little fun doing it. “Whichever is closer, love.”
SIX
Kassa
I lifted my phone but paused before I hit connect. It was one o’clock on the West Coast, but I figured that neither Gray nor my brother was awake yet. For the last week, they had been going out and not getting home until nearly dawn, or so Jace had told me. Gray hadn’t been nearly as forthcoming with what he had been doing during the last week, but I could guess.
I hated that I could guess. Hated that I spent so many hours thinking about what he was probably doing, but I kept reminding myself that I wasn’t supposed to hurt over the things he did with girls I would never meet. Girls he most likely would never see a second time and forgot their names the minute they walked out the door.
Tainted Butterfly (Tainted Knights Book 2) Page 4