by Holly Renee
“You all need to leave.” I looked toward the door to make sure Hank wasn’t coming back. I didn’t want them to cause a scene. I couldn’t afford to lose my job.
“We’re not leaving here without you.” It wasn’t the words that surprised me but who they came from.
“You don’t have a say, Parker.” I stared up at him. He was still about six inches taller than me even in my heels and his green eyes were on fire.
“He’s right,” Mason growled. “You are coming home.”
I searched the room full of his friends who were all staring at us but pretending not to. I didn’t recognize any of them, and it hit me how far I had removed myself from my brother. I barely knew anything about him anymore.
Wanting to go home with him wasn’t the problem. I just didn’t want to get hurt again. Parker had practically destroyed me once and being around him made my chest ache. I couldn’t risk losing myself to him again, but I couldn’t tell my brother that. I had been nothing more than Parker’s secret, and my brother would shit himself if he knew what happened. If he knew that Parker was the reason I ran.
So instead of telling him, I put a smile on my face and tried to avoid the topic altogether.
“Who’s getting married anyways?” I looked around the room again. Some of the guys were covered in tattoos like Parker and some looked clean cut like my brother.
It wasn’t until my gaze landed back on the two men that my world used to revolve around that I realized how fucked I really was. All it took was one word from Parker’s lips.
“Me.”
L I V
Four years and six months earlier
Everyone was laughing at a joke Parker was telling. He was animated, using his hands as he spoke, and the group around him was eating it up.
I took a sip of my water since my brother was a party pooper and wouldn’t let me drink like everyone else. Mason was only a year older than me, and we were all too young to drink. But he thought he was my dad and the only way he agreed to let me come to the party was if I swore I wouldn’t drink.
Like I said, party pooper.
I watched Parker as he pushed his brown hair out of his eyes. His girlfriend, Madison, stood attached to his side, and she hadn’t taken her eyes off him. I wanted to tell her to back off because Parker was mine.
Except he wasn’t.
He was hers.
I was just a girl who was in love with him.
She giggled loudly at something he was saying, and I rolled my eyes. Parker was funny, but his joke wasn’t that funny.
With every second that passed, I could feel the oxygen leaving the room. I was suffocating in my jealousy, and there was only so much I could take. Parker looked up at me when I stood, but his girlfriend quickly drew his attention back to her when she touched his arm. Her eyes flicked to me, and I could see the warning there. Parker was hers, and I better back off. It was loud and clear.
But she didn’t need to worry about me. I didn’t stand a chance.
The back deck creaked under my weight, and I filled my lungs with fresh air.
Keeping my feelings for Parker in check had become a full-time job, and it crushed me to watch him with another girl. It killed me.
There had been plenty of girls over the years too. He had been my brother’s best friend for as long as I could remember, and there wasn’t a time when I wasn’t in love with him. It felt like it was the only thing I had ever known.
Everyone liked Parker. He was funny, athletic, and handsome as hell. But there were so many things about Parker that those other girls didn’t see. He was a fiercely loyal friend, and he had my brother’s back more times than I could count. He was also sweet. It wasn’t a side of him that he let many people see, but I saw it. He treated his momma like she was a queen, and although he probably wouldn’t admit it out loud, I knew he went once a week to visit his grandfather.
His art though. That was how I knew the true Parker.
I jumped when I heard the door open behind me, and I held my breath with hope that Parker came after me. But just like the bloom of hope that I always held in my chest, this one was destroyed just as quickly as it formed.
A head of shaggy blond hair poked out the door, and I quickly recognized him as Thomas Alexander, a guy who graduated with my brother and Parker.
“Hey, Olivia.” He walked out onto the porch before closing the door quietly behind him. I wanted to tell him that I hated when people used my full name, but for some reason, I stopped myself.
“Hey, Thomas. How are you?” I took a sip of my water to cover how awkward I felt being out here alone with him.
Thomas was cute. Really cute actually, but he wasn’t Parker. I didn’t get butterflies in my stomach when he walked into the room. I didn’t hold my breath waiting for him to say my name.
“I’m good. I’m just in town visiting from school.” He pushed his hair back out of his face, and I noticed how blue his eyes were for the first time.
Maybe this was what I needed. I couldn’t get over my crush on Parker unless I tried to move on with someone else. Right?
“That’s awesome. How is school going?”
“It’s great. It’s weird being so far away from home, but I love it. I’m in a fraternity and my brothers are cool as shit. We throw parties that are so much better than anything that’s thrown in this town.”
Blah. Blah. Blah.
I looked out over the deck railing and watched the moon’s reflection beam against the ground. The moon was so grand and larger than life, and when I looked up in the sky and saw it surrounded by stars, it reminded me of Parker. He was so far out of my reach. I could admire him from afar just like everyone else except the stars. They were the only ones that were in the same realm as him. I would never be one of the stars. I would never be the girl who got Parker James.
“Did you hear me, Olivia?” Thomas’s voice finally broke through, and I realized that I hadn’t been listening to a word he said.
“I’m sorry. What?” He had moved much closer to me when I wasn’t paying attention, and he was only about a foot away now. I could easily reach out and touch him.
“Have you decided where you’re going to go to school yet? You graduate in just a few months.”
“Oh, school. Umm…” I tucked my hair behind my ear. I would be lying if I said that Parker wasn’t the biggest factor in me deciding where I wanted to go. “I’ve been accepted to a few schools that I’m interested in, but I’ll probably stay home and go the University of Tennessee.”
“Really?” He snarled his lip and my back straightened.
“Yeah. I’ve been interested in the University of Tennessee for as long as I can remember. What’s wrong with that?”
“There’s nothing wrong with it. You are just so incredibly smart. I don’t want to see you stuck in this town like a bunch of those losers in there.” He hiked his thumb over his shoulder in the direction of the party that was still in full swing.
“Those guys aren’t losers. Just because you go to an ivy league school doesn’t mean you are any better than them.” I crossed my arms and bit my lip between my teeth to stop myself from losing my temper.
“Actually, it does. It’s practically the definition of being better than them.” He smirked, and I wanted to smack him in his face that no longer looked the least bit attractive.
Before I got the chance, the back door burst open with a loud crash against the wall and Parker stepped out onto the porch.
“What the hell, Livy?” His voice was stern. “Mason and I have been looking for you everywhere.”
“Obviously not everywhere. We’ve been out here for about fifteen minutes.”
Parker snapped his gaze toward Thomas, and Thomas shrank back minutely. Maybe he was smarter than I gave him credit for.
“Come on, Livy.” Parker held his hand out to me, and I instantly placed my hand in his. The warmth of his skin ran through me, and I could feel that small, innocent touch throughout my whole body.
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Thomas stepped toward me, his body crowding mine, and blocked my path to get to Parker.
“What’s your problem, Parker? We’re just talking.” There was a small part of me that was impressed Thomas had the balls to stand up to Parker. Not many guys did. His eyes were burning into Thomas and his muscles that clearly had about thirty pounds on Thomas were tense under his t-shirt.
“My problem is that you have no business being out here with Livy. She is too young for you and too good for you.”
I peeked over Thomas’s shoulder to look at Parker.
“That’s rich coming from you, Parker. You think you’re good enough for her? I’m in college. What are you doing? Doodling all your hopes and dreams?”
Parker’s art wasn’t doodles. It was phenomenal. He probably had more talent in his pinky finger than Thomas fully possessed. I opened my mouth to defend him, but he spoke before I could manage a sound.
“I’m not good enough for her either.” His eyes glanced at me for a moment. “She deserves far more than anyone at this party can give her.” My heart swelled and broke at the same time. “But I’m damn sure that you are going nowhere near her. So, I suggest you move out of the way or I’ll put you on your ass.”
“I’ll think I’ll leave it up to Olivia.” Thomas looked over his shoulder at me, and he looked smug. “Do you want to stay with me or go with him?”
My answer was easy. It had been my answer for as long as I could remember, and I didn’t feel like it would change anytime soon.
“Him.”
Parker’s pupils flared, but I wouldn’t let myself believe it was anything more than what it was. He was planning for a fight, and a fight was coming.
Thomas moved away from me and the disgust on his face was clear. I barely even knew the guy so I wasn’t really sure what his problem was.
“Are you serious, Olivia?”
I looked at him then back to Parker then back at him again.
“Yes?” I said it like a question. How did he think I would actually pick him over Parker?
“That’s fine.” He took a step closer to me and Parker mirrored his movement. “I always knew you were just a piece of trash like the rest of them.”
“Fuck you.” I took a step closer to him, but Parker was already there.
His arm reached out against me and pressed into my stomach. He pushed me behind him, somewhat forcefully, and I realized that his control was unraveling. Although I couldn’t see Parker’s face, I could clearly read the fear in Thomas’s eyes. He tried to mask it with his venom, but it was too real to hide.
Before Thomas got a chance to say another word, Parker’s fist landed across his jaw and knocked Thomas to the ground. Everything happened so quickly, but I felt like it happened in slow motion. I memorized the bunch of Parker’s muscles as he struck and the trail of blood that ran from Thomas’s lip as he fell.
Parker was on Thomas before his head even connected with the ground. He gripped his perfectly pressed collared shirt in his hands and pulled Thomas’s face close to his. “Don’t ever talk to Livy like that again.” Thomas started to open his mouth, but Parker shook him by his shirt. “Better yet, don’t ever talk to her at all. Don’t look at her. Don’t even breathe her name.”
Parker shoved Thomas away from him, and I cringed at the loud echo from his head hitting the wood of the porch.
The green of Parker’s eyes looked lethal as he stepped away from Thomas and made his way to me. There was a smattering of blood running down his knuckles, but I wasn’t sure who it belonged to.
Parker grabbed my hand in his and pulled me behind him without saying a word. His anger was scary. He was uncontrollable, unpredictable, and so damn hot.
My breathing was hard, but it wasn’t out of fear. I wanted Parker James. Every day it seemed to get worse and worse, and there was nothing I could do to stop it.
I followed him through the house as he pulled me along behind him. He was walking so fast that I was having a hard time keeping up with him. His tight grip on my hand was leaving a bite of pain, but I liked it. I would take his skin on mine any way I could get it.
He took us to a large sitting room that was completely unoccupied before he dropped my hand and started pacing the room. It was shocking how quickly I was affected by the loss of his touch.
He ran his hands through his hair, and I watched as the blood from his knuckles trailed down his fingers.
“Parker, you’re hurt.”
I reached out for his hand, and he let me take it. All four knuckles of his fist were busted open and the blood was definitely his.
“We need to clean this up.”
“I’ll be fine.”
“But Parker…”
“I’ll be fine.” His tone was final. “Are you okay?”
“Me?” I pointed to my chest. “I’m not the one who just got into a fight.”
“I know.” He gripped both of my hands in his and butterflies took off in my stomach. We were standing so close to each other that I could feel the warmth of him. I could see the specks of gold that hid in the green of his eyes. His busted hand rose from mine and tucked a piece of my brown hair behind my ear. “But you are the one who Thomas just talked to like that.”
“Like what?” The voice boomed through the room, and I gritted my teeth.
I loved my brother. I really did. I just had to keep repeating that over and over in my head. He was probably the best brother I could wish for, but he had the absolute worst timing. Whenever I thought something was about to happen between Parker and I, Mason would burst into the room and ruin any chance of what was about to happen. I didn’t know if it was on purpose or not, but either way, his timing was impeccable.
“It’s fine, Mason.” I pulled my eyes away from Parker to look at my brother. Parker had widened the space between us as soon as my brother walked in, and he looked like he wanted to be anywhere but here.
“What happened?” Mason stepped closer to me, and as he stepped out of the doorway, I noticed a small blonde lingering by the door.
“Thomas Alexander ran his mouth, but I took care of it.” Parker spit out the words as if he was disgusted to even say his name.
Mason looked at Parker, and I could see them speaking to each other without ever saying a word. It drove me crazy because I wanted to know what the hell they had to say. It was something they did often, and it pissed me off. When Mason seemed satisfied with his silent conversation with Parker, he patted his shoulder once.
“Are you okay?” Mason gripped my chin in his hand and his eyes ran over my face.
“I told you I’m fine.”
“Then where were you? We were looking everywhere for you.”
“Mason…” I sighed.
“Don’t ‘Mason’ me. Where were you?”
I crossed my arms, and he matched my stance. He was stubborn, but I had been following in his footsteps my whole life. I could be stubborn too. I learned it from the best.
“Dude, back off of her.” Mason’s eyes snapped from mine to his best friend’s. “Just give her some space. I think she’s dealt with enough tonight.”
Parker was standing up for me to my brother, and I couldn’t hide the small smile on my face.
Mason took a deep breath and looked me over again. “Let’s get out of here.”
“But…” the small, forgotten blonde at the door piped up.
I had never seen her before, but I wasn’t surprised. Mason didn’t stay with one girl for long.
“We’re going to have to have a rain check, doll.” Mason smiled down at her, and I wanted to puke when I saw her melt before my eyes.
“I can take Livy home.”
Parker’s words shocked me, and they seemed to shock my brother as well.
“You sure, man?” Mason looked from the blonde back to me.
“Yeah. I’ve got nothing better to do.”
Pain bloomed in my chest at his words, but I smiled the same fake smile that I wore often when I was around
him. Did he not see how bad his words affected me?
“Cool.” Mason and Parker slapped hands and then Mason took off with the small blonde in tow.
“You ready?”
“Yeah.” My voice was clipped, and Parker could tell. He gave me a strange look, and I internally flipped him off for saying he had nothing better to do.
“Okay…” he hesitated before he led the way out to his truck.
He opened the door for me, and I rolled my eyes at the part of me that was swooning at his chivalry. I was just as easy as the blonde with my brother.
The truck roared to life and he thumbed his phone for a few seconds before one of my favorite songs started playing through the speakers.
I watched the houses pass by us out the window so he couldn’t see the smile on my face.
“Are you really not going to talk the whole way home?” He looked over at me quickly before returning his attention to the road.
“I’m just tired.”
“Really, Livy? I know you’re mad. I’m just not sure why.” He chuckled softly, and even though it was my favorite sound in the world, it grated on my nerves in that moment.
“Don’t worry about it. I’m sure you’ve got better things to do anyways.” I knew I was being catty, but he hurt my feelings.
Asshole.
“Ahh. That’s what this is about. You’re really mad about that?” His hand ran over the steering wheel, and I watched the way his fingers softly bounced against the leather to the low beat of the music that was playing.
“I’m not mad. I’m hurt.” I looked back out the window and watched as we pulled into my driveway. The only light on in the house was the living room light that I had left on earlier, and when I looked up at my mom’s dark bedroom window, I knew she still wasn’t home.
“Fuck, Livy. I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.” He put the truck in park and turned to face me.
“Like I said, don’t worry about it, Parker.” My hand gripped the door handle, but he put his hand over mine before I could open it.
“What did you want me to say?”