by Holly Renee
“Not here.” I looked out her door to see Parker coming back inside.
“Tonight.” She pointed at me. “We’re going out when he’s finished with you.”
She didn’t realize how much her words would affect me, but she also didn’t know that Parker had been finished with me long before tonight. If we were all going to work together, I might as well tell her. God knows that Parker had already told Brandon what went down between us.
“Deal.”
She grinned again as I walked out of her room and headed back to Parker.
“You ready to finish up?” I climbed back into his chair. He was sitting on his stool and his head was buried in his phone.
“Yea.”
He put his phone in his pocket. “This might be brutal though. The outline is already trying to heal and when I go over it with fresh ink, it might hurt like a bitch.”
“I can handle it.” But I wasn’t sure that I could because he was right. The first time hurt, but ripping open my wounds with fresh pain was likely to kill me.
“Okay. Let me know if he becomes too much.” He pressed his gun against my ribs again, this time the pain more intense than the last.
L I V Y
Four Years and five months earlier
Parker and I were either being really careful, or my brother didn’t pay very good attention. Actually, the only thing he seemed to pay attention to these days was all the girls he had coming in and out of his rotating door.
It had been two weeks since Parker had taken me to the karaoke bar, and it had been the best two weeks of my life. We had gone to dinner, to the movies, to the mountains, but we hadn’t even come close to getting as physical as we had the night at his grandparents.
I didn’t know why either. It wasn’t from a lack of trying on my part. Every time I thought something was going to happen, he would change the subject, move away from me, or pretend like he didn’t notice.
But tonight wasn’t up to him. I was making the plans, and he didn’t have a choice.
When I pulled up outside his house, one hour before our plans, I sent him a text.
* * *
I hope you don’t have any plans tonight.
* * *
Parker: ??? I have plans with you. Don’t I?
* * *
You do! Get your butt outside.
* * *
A moment later, he poked his head out the door and looked out at me standing with my back against my car. I was wearing a pair of cut-off blue jean shorts that I knew drove him crazy, a tied up white tank top, and a pair of aviator sunglasses. He walked up to me slowly, his gaze running from my head to my toes.
“What’s all this about?” He put his hand on my hip pulling my body close to his.
“Change of plans.” He watched my lips as I spoke. “We’re not going to the movies tonight.”
“Oh yeah? Then what are we doing?”
“It’s a surprise.” I pushed him away from me with my hands on his chest and pointed to the passenger seat. “Now get in.”
He grinned before climbing into my car, and as soon as I took my seat behind the wheel, he pulled my hand to his and kissed my knuckles.
After thirty minutes of holding my hand and trying to guess where we were going, he finally asked, “Are you really not going to tell me where we’re going?”
“Nope. What kind of surprise would that be?”
He huffed and looked out the window.
It was ten minutes later when we pulled up to an old campground that my mom used to bring my brother and me to before she forgot to give a shit anymore.
“What are we doing?” He stepped out of the car and looked around at the nothingness that was before us.
I popped the trunk of my car, which was packed to the brim with camping gear. “We’re going camping.”
He looked into my trunk and then back at me. “And your brother? Where does he think you’re going to be tonight?”
I pulled him closer to me, my finger in his belt loop. “At a friend’s house. Tonight it’s just you and me.”
The tent was set up, sleeping bags laid out, fire going, and Parker seemed to be keeping a wide berth from me.
There was hesitation in his eyes that I had frequently seen over the last couple weeks. He was nervous to be alone with me. I didn’t know his reasoning, but he didn’t have a choice tonight. There was no one else around. Not for miles.
“Do you want to play a game?” I sat down in a chair next to the fire, and he sat down directly across from me.
“What kind of game?” he asked hesitantly, but the smirk that caused me to fall in love with him pulled at his lips.
“Truth or dare?” I shrugged.
“Okay.” He took a sip of his water and I watched his throat as he swallowed.
“I’ll go first.” I leaned forward in my seat and watched him. “Truth or dare, Parker?”
“Truth.” He grinned.
“Did I mention that if you refuse to tell the truth or complete your dare you have to strip?”
“You can’t make up rules as we go.” He moved closer to the fire, matching me.
“I do what I want, Parker James. Now tell the truth. How many girls have you been with?”
He stared me down before pulling his black t-shirt over his head. A small pang of jealousy hit my chest, but I knew he wouldn’t answer the question. And I couldn’t be jealous when I was the one who got to sit across from him without his shirt on.
“So we’re going to play dirty, huh?” He raised his eyebrow. “Truth or dare?”
I tapped on my chin as if it was the hardest decision I had ever made. “Dare.”
He narrowed his eyes. He hadn’t expected me to pick dare, but he should have learned a long time ago that I would never back down from a challenge.
“I dare you to kiss me.”
I stood from my chair and made my way over to him. He angled his face toward me, but instead of kissing him, I took the opportunity to lower myself down, straddling his lap.
“What are you doing?” His hands gripped my hips as if I was about to attack him.
“Kissing you. That was my dare wasn’t it.” I leaned my body into his and ran my tongue over his neck where I could see his pulse.
“Livy,” he growled.
“Yes?” The word was a whisper on my lips as I sucked his earlobe into my mouth.
“You’re not playing fair.” He gripped my hips harder.
I leaned back to look at him. “You weren’t specific about the kiss, and you can’t make up rules as we go.” I winked at him, and he rolled his eyes. “Truth or dare?”
“Dare.”
“I dare you to close your eyes for ten seconds and during those ten seconds you can’t stop whatever it is I’m doing?”
He swallowed, hard. “If I refuse?”
“Then these bad boys are coming off.” I pulled on the leg of his jeans before he bit out a curse.
He leaned his head against the back of the chair and his eyes slowly slid closed. The muscles of his abs were tightened in anticipation, and they jumped under my touch as I ran my hand over the ridges of muscle.
I pressed my lips to the corner of his and his hands bit into my hips as I ground down against him. I ran my mouth down his neck, peppering kisses against his skin, and causing goosebumps with a trail of my teeth.
“Truth or dare?” His voice was rough and my thighs involuntary tightened against him.
“Truth.” I ran my tongue against his collarbone.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?”
I leaned back away from him then I slowly lifted my shirt from my body.
“What are you doing?” he whispered as if we were about to be caught.
“That’s more than one question, but I didn’t feel like answering the first so I’m paying the consequences.”
He ran his hand through his hair, but his gaze stayed glued to my breasts. “We can’t do this, Livy.”
He didn’t lo
ok like he believed what he was saying. He looked like this was exactly what he wanted to do.
“Truth or dare?”
He looked up at my face, then. Lust staring back at me.
“Truth.”
“Why don’t you want me?”
“What?” He stood from the chair, me in his arms.
“You heard me.”
He was walking, and I had no idea where he was taking us. I couldn’t take my eyes away from him. We crashed into the tent, his body falling on top of me, his weight supported by his arms.
“Don’t say that shit again, Livy.” His voice was stern, and I didn’t push him. “I have never wanted something so bad in my life.” He ran his nose along my chest, his skin brushing against the skin of my breast. “But you are worth more.”
He started to pull away from me, but I wrapped my legs around his waist and held him against me.
“Don’t say that again.” He watched me. His eyes searching my face. “I want you to be my first, Parker. I want you to be my last. Please don’t make me beg you.”
I barely finished my sentence before his mouth slammed against mine. It wasn’t a kiss like you see in the movies where our mouths moved perfectly against each other as we tasted each other. Instead, our kiss was desperate. He drug my bottom lip through his teeth and my hips rose to meet his, begging for more. His hands were wrapped in my hair and our chests heaved against one another.
He pulled his mouth away from mine and I groaned at the loss. But then his tongue tasted my neck and I had never wanted it anywhere more.
I gripped his hair in my hands as he moved his way down my body. The air hit my breasts as he pulled the cups of my bra down. He looked down at me, admiring my body, and I squirmed under his stare.
“You are so fucking beautiful.” He laid his hand at the base of my neck before running it down my chest and cupping my breast in his hand.
His eyes held mine as he lowered his mouth, watching me, teasing me, and when his tongue met my nipple, I almost came out of my skin. He took his time with me, my stomach clenched tight and my panties soaked by the time he popped the button of my jean shorts.
“Are you sure?” He stared into my eyes, and I knew in that moment that regardless where we went from here, this moment would always be one of the most real moments I would ever know. We were raw and sure and completely in love.
“I’ve never been surer of anything in my life.”
He pressed his forehead against mine, his breath harsh against my lips.
He slowly pulled my shorts down my legs followed by my panties. He was taking his time and touching every inch of my skin.
He kissed his way up my legs, and my stomach tightened as he pushed my thighs apart. My legs shook under his touch. My heart raced under his stare.
He watched me, never moving his gaze from mine, as he lowered his mouth between my thighs. My back arched as he pressed his lips against me, and I gripped his shoulders when his tongue tasted me for the first time.
I had never experienced anything like it in my life. I had never felt so exposed, so worshiped, or so needy.
He took his time until I was a writhing mess underneath him, and by the time he moved up my body, I felt like I was going to come out of my skin. He lined himself up against me, and I arched my body begging him for more.
But he didn’t move.
He just stared down at me, watching me, and driving me crazy.
“Please, Parker,” I begged, desperate for him.
He ran his hand against my forehead moving my hair out of my face before pushing into me slowly. The pain was instant and overwhelming, but I didn’t have time to think about it because his mouth was next to my ear and he was whispering words that I never thought I’d hear.
“I love you, Olivia.”
“Parker.” His name was a cry on my lips.
“I do. I fucking love you.” He began moving inside me slowly, careful not to hurt me.
“I love you too.”
He pressed his mouth to mine then he took his time worshipping my body. We clung to each other like it was the only moment we had, and we whispered each other’s names as he brought me to the brink.
But we didn’t worry about my brother.
We didn’t worry about what anyone else would think.
We didn’t worry about his past or mine or what tomorrow would bring.
The only thing I could see in my future was him.
Parker and Mason were in my living room when I walked in the door from school. I tried not to get giddy when I saw Parker sitting there, but he winked at me when Mason wasn’t looking and I couldn’t stop.
“How was school?” Mason asked.
“Boring. I’m so ready for it to be over.” I threw my backpack on the ground, and Parker nodded toward the kitchen.
I made my way to the kitchen and grabbed a soda from the refrigerator. When I closed the refrigerator door, Parker pinned me against it and pressed his lips against mine.
“What are you doing?” I whispered while I looked over his shoulder for my brother.
“I couldn’t stand not touching you for another second,” he murmured against my skin as he ran his nose up my neck.
“You’re going to get us caught.” I leaned my head back against the refrigerator and gave him better access.
He nipped on my earlobe, causing me to moan softly before he started kissing my neck. “Tell me to stop,” he whispered in my ear.
I couldn’t tell him to stop, and he knew it. I had absolutely no will power when it came to him.
I clutched his t-shirt in my hands and pressed my hips against his. He wrapped one arm around my back and his other trailed over my stomach.
I didn’t tell him to stop when his hand cupped my breast over my shirt, and I didn’t tell him to stop when his hand slid under my jeans.
I pressed my face into his shoulder when his finger ran over my clit. He was gentle and soft and slow, and it was driving me crazy.
My hands dug into him as I felt my orgasm building. There was something so risky and thrilling about sneaking around behind my brother’s back. I knew I should have at least felt somewhat guilty, but instead I felt a rush over the possibility of being caught.
My legs shook as Parker moved his finger faster and faster against me, and when he entered a finger inside me, I completely fell apart.
He slammed his mouth over mine to catch my moans, and I bit down on his lip as my orgasm racked through me.
“Hey, Parker,” my brother called from the other room, and I tensed as the last waves of pleasure ran through me.
“Yeah?” Parker called back to him while staring into my eyes.
“Grab me a soda. Will you?”
Parker smirked before pressing another kiss to my lips. He stared at me as he put his finger into his mouth and before slowly pulling it back out.
I watched him, my legs still trembling from his touch, and my heart still racing from the rush.
He grabbed my soda off the counter, kissed me one more time, then walked out into the living room to my brother.
P A R K E R
Present
Her chest was rising and falling quickly as she tried to breathe through the pain. Normally, I didn’t really care if it was hurting while I was tattooing, but with her, I cared about everything.
I wiped over my work, gathering the excess ink, and ran my finger over her skin. I watched as her stomach shuddered under my touch. Her shirt was tucked underneath her bra, pulling it tight against her breast, and her stomach was completely exposed. The curve of her hip vastly different from all the hard edges that surrounded her.
That was the thing about Livy, she always stood out from everything else. When everyone else was being serious, she would have a spark of mischief in her eyes. When everyone else was quiet, she always had something to say.
That was the reason I did this tattoo for her, the reason I drew it for her. She had been born wild. She was fierce, she was crazy, she was
funny, but most of all, she was unpredictable. She never took the road that most traveled upon, and she surprised me at every turn.
She was chaos and madness, her heart never sitting still for long, and when I was with her, everything else crumbled away and I felt like I was home.
“Why was she here?” I looked up at her, but she had her eyes covered with her arm.
“Who?” I rubbed some salve over her fresh ink.
“Come on, Parker.” She huffed causing her full pink lips to pout. “Madison.”
“She shows up here about once every six months or so.”
She moved her arm, finally giving me her eyes.
“What does she want?”
“What does Madison always want? To stir up shit. She thinks if she keeps coming here that I’ll eventually tattoo her and that it will spark something between us, but it won’t. I always refuse anyway.”
She looked away from me slightly, and I knew she was thinking about the other day when she sent her away.
“She seemed pissed that you were here though.”
“You caught that?” She winced.
“Yup. I watched the whole thing.” I chuckled softly.
“Well thanks a lot. You could have come out there and helped me, you know.”
“That’s true, but then I wouldn’t have been able to watch you go all territorial over me.” I grinned.
No matter what she said and no matter how different our lives had become, she still cared.
“Please.” She rolled her eyes. “I just didn’t want to look at her for any longer than I had to.”
“Uh huh.” I stripped my gloves off my hands and reached my hand out to her. She looked at it suspiciously and regret filled my chest. There was a time when Livy would take my hand without question. She had trusted me fully, and I ruined that.
“We’re all done.” I motioned to her new ink, and she smiled. It was a smile that made me question everything. Emily was safe. She was the exact opposite from Livy, but in that moment, being safe terrified me more. I needed to know that I would taste the chaos again, and even though Livy’s fire scared the shit out of me, I had more fear of never again feeling her burn.