"Okay, Julian, I fucked the hell out of her," I said dryly. "I had her in the kitchen, the living room, her jeep, everywhere. We were rutting like rabbits in heat."
"Really?" Julian said, actually studying me to see if I was telling the truth.
"Julian, please. We talked and hung out. That was it."
"What hung out?"
I didn't give him the satisfaction of even answering that retarded question. "You're just jealous because you were reading your palm last night. Get any good fortunes? What does the future hold for you, my friend?"
"Don't be dissin' masturbation, Harlan. If it weren't for that I'd probably be out of my damn mind. It's because of that sacred act that I've been able to have sex with every single girl in our entire school."
I broke down and started giggling.
"Don't laugh," he said. "It's totally true."
"I know. That's exactly why I'm laughing. Just don't be offering to shake my hand, okay?"
"I use my left to beat off, so it doesn't matter."
"Julian. Does the phrase: 'Way too fucking much information' mean anything to you? There are some things that you just don't tell your friends."
The conversation pretty much stayed on the same track as we walked, so I don't need to write any more on it. Besides, Julian would probably kill me if I told anymore.
Vlad was sitting on the curb when we arrived, sipping on a Big Gulp, the largest size that you can get. He looked rather funny holding it, like a small child with a comically oversized cup. He was wearing sunglasses, as if the sun was too painful to bear.
"Can life get any more pathetic than this, man?" Vlad asked. "Sitting on a curb at a 7-11 and drinking a fuckin' Big Gulp."
"I've been more pathetic than that, Vlad," Julian said in a somber voice. He opened the door. "I'm going to get myself something, too. You want something, Harlan?"
I shook my head, sat down on the curb next to Vlad, and yawned. I need some sleep badly. I only get something like three hours a night, which is sad really, when you think about it. Samantha drove me home at three a.m. and I didn't finally fall asleep until at least four.
Vlad yawned as well, as if it was contagious. He offered me a sip of his Big Gulp. "Want some?"
"Why not," I said, taking the bucket in my hand. It had to weigh at least two pounds. Can anybody really drink this much soda? I needed the sugar anyway.
Ross Morrissey pulled his Mustang into the parking lot.
I was so damn startled, I almost left my own body. He got out of the car along with four of his pigskin throwing buddies. They were all wearing their jerseys.
Ross threw his hands out melodramatically before him. "Do my eyes deceive me?" He asked, looking at his friends. "Is that really Harlan Sexton and his faggot friend?" Ross had shaved his entire head, even his eyebrows. His nose was bandaged up from his little bar spat and his voice sounded nasal. He looked downright scary all shaved like that. Almost alien. Ross looked around again in an over-exaggerated way. "Well, I don't see no faggot cavalry to help you guys out now. Harlan, I think I'm going to beat you first. You being such a pretty boy and all."
Now that was scary. How can the sentence, 'Harlan, I think I'm going to beat you first' ever sound anything but scary?
I found myself pulled to my feet, the Big Gulp spilling onto the pavement. Veins were popping out all over Ross's face.
He threw me onto the hood of the Mustang and brought his fist back.
"Let him go, asshole! Unless of course you feel like dying. I guess if you had to die, a nice day like this would be just fine!"
Ross's eyes widened and he let go of my shirt. He turned around just to see who had the balls to talk to him like that. When Ross's big body finally moved to the side and let me get a glimpse of what was going on—my mouth dropped as well.
Vlad stood on the curb, the wind blowing his black jacket and hair wildly. He had a fucking gun in his hand.
Ross and his friends were backing away, their hands in the air. Julian walked out of the door carrying a bag of food. He did a kind of comical double take. He looked over at Ross, then me, then Vlad, then he repeated it all over again.
"You can put that away," Ross said. I noticed that there was a darkening stain on the front of his jeans. "We were only kidding. We weren't going to really do anything."
Vlad laughed as Julian and I looked at him in awe. I got off the hood and went and stood off to the side.
"Man, it doesn't take much to make a tough guy like you piss his pants, does it?" Vlad asked, holding the gun before him powerfully. "Now, I want you to get back in that car there and go on your merry way."
Ross looked down at the front of his pants and he blushed—apparently he hadn't even realized it. He looked back up at Vlad. "You're fucking dead, faggot! You're not always going to have that gun to protect you."
"BANG!" Vlad shrieked, and everyone dove to the pavement.
Ross fell backwards, as if he had taken a bullet in the gut. It scared the hell out of me and Julian as well. That did it for Ross and his apes. They scurried into the Mustang and sped away.
Vlad tucked the gun into his pants, looked at us, and smiled. "Well, that was easy enough."
Julian and I exchanged looks of amazement.
"Did that really just happen?" Julian asked. "I swear when he shouted bang I thought he pulled the trigger." Julian got down on his knees and began to wave his arms up and down. "Vlad you are an absolute fucking God in my eyes. Can I be your disciple?"
I laughed, but it was a nervous laugh. I was still wondering if perhaps Vlad might be just a tad psychotic. "We better get the hell out of here," I said. "Those assholes are probably on the phone to the police already."
As we left the convenience store, both Julian and I were looking at Vlad with a whole different mentality. When he had stood there holding the gun, there wasn't a trace of fear. The gun didn't even shake. Shit, my hands shake when I try to have a harmless conversation with Sam and he stays perfectly still confronting Satan himself.
"Where the hell did you get that gun?" Julian asked as we headed back towards my house.
Vlad closed his coat so the gun couldn't be seen in his waistband. "I took it from my Dad's closet. He'll never even know it was gone."
Ever the pessimist, I spoke next. "Of course, you guys know we're dead. I mean that in the literal sense too. Not only did this incident get Ross riled up, but this time he got some of the other football players after us as well. We may have the entire football team after us now."
"Now that's a scary thought," Julian said. "The whole entire team. Jesus. What do we do now?"
"I don't think there is anything we can do," I answered. "I guess we just go on with our lives until they come down on us like a goddamn avalanche."
"Damn, Harlan!" Julian exclaimed. "Did you have to put it so well?"
Vlad pushed his hair back. "I don't think you guys have too much to worry about. I'm the one they're after. I'm the one who got Ross with the paint. I'm the one who made him piss his pants."
Julian laughed. "Vlad, my friend. You obviously don't know my brother. I'm willing to bet that he sees us all as one person. He's always hated Harlan anyway. Says he has an attitude."
I smiled grimly. "I wonder how he ever got that idea."
When we got to my house, my Mom was just leaving. She waved as she went but I saw her studying Vlad. She made a face like he was the Boogeyman or something. She would have really died if she knew he was packing a gun.
We entered the house and crashed on the couch. "So, Vlad, why do you have that gun anyway?"
Vlad patted the gun tucked in his waistband. "When you get your ass kicked as many times as I have, you have to draw the line. Last week I just figured it was time to push back."
"Hence, the paint," Julian added.
"Yep," Vlad said. "Your brother ruined a two hundred dollar jacket of mine last month. I've been thinking of ways to make his life miserable ever since."
I suddenly got up from t
he couch. "Oh shit, Julian, I almost forgot! Samantha says that she has a friend that's likes you. Her name's Allison."
Julian's face lit up. "You kidding? Is she hot?"
"I wouldn't know," I said, grabbing bottled water and opening it up. "I never saw her."
"Yeah, she's probably a fat chick with a harelip or something."
"Well she does have a stutter, I know that," I joked—only Julian thought I was serious judging by his expression. "She's trying to get it under control, though."
Julian was about to say something when the phone rang. Hoping it wasn't the police, I picked it up, eyes closed.
"So, did you have a good time?" Sam asked into my ear.
I was floored. I was so afraid that she hadn't seen last night the same way.
"More than you can possibly imagine," I said, mouthing Sam's name to Julian and Vlad as they nodded. It was a cordless phone, so I walked into my bedroom and closed the door.
"Really?" she asked. "You're not just saying that to spare my feelings? I can take it you know."
"Sam, why would I lie? Actually I was afraid you were the one who didn't have a good time."
"Harlan, are you insane? I'm still floating. I'm actually dizzy." She had taken the words right out of my mouth. "I hope I'm not out of line here, but do you want to do it again tonight?"
"I have to work until ten, but I'd definitely like a rerun."
"Oh, I can assure you it won't be a rerun," she said, her voice lowering to a sexy whisper. "Tonight's going to be a whole new show."
"Sam, if you want you can stop down at the video store tonight—or better yet come like a half hour before we close and then you can pick me up."
"Okay, Harlan, I'll be there at nine-thirty. It's a date."
Oh yeah—before I forget, can you give me the phone number of your friend Allison? Julian is definitely interested."
"Is he a gentleman like you?"
"Not really, but I can assure you he's a nice guy."
I wrote down the number and we hung up, promising to see each other later. I wasn't used to dealing with the happy thing. Actually I can't ever remember being this happy. The really odd thing is that I believe that I love Sam already. Is that possible? I just met her for the first time yesterday and already I'm in love.
Everything I think of leads to her. Every song, every sentence, every reference. I'm, like, completely obsessed. If she suddenly called me this second and told me everything was off I'd actually be crushed. Two days and she already has the power to wound me so badly. Why does the love thing have to make you so vulnerable? It seems like you have to put everything on the line just to have it.
I left my room and discovered Julian was already sleeping. Vlad smiled at me and I waved my hand indicating he should follow me into the kitchen. Before I went, I tucked the phone number into Julian's shirt pocket.
Vlad and I sat in the kitchen for the next three hours just talking about everything. I found out he really wasn't much different than me. We had the same fears about the world. We both suffered bouts of depression. We both found humor in the darkest of circumstances.
Before I left for work, I realized that I really liked Vlad. I was proud to call him my friend, and I don't make friends very easily.
Chapter 7:
The Promise
The clock is glaring at me with its six a.m. wake up call. I'm fighting the urge to throw it into the wall, smashing it to little shards of plastic. Sam didn't take me home until three in the morning, and I didn't fall asleep until five. Julian is sleeping on the floor, mouth wide open, making faint snoring noises.
Right now I would definitely kill someone for a cup of coffee. I think I'd even kill myself, only that's not very funny considering my circumstances.
Do I still plan to kill myself, Dear Reader?
I don't know. I certainly have my moments. Sam and I talked all night, but of course that wasn't all we did. We touched each other quite a lot. I realized last night that I definitely love her. For some odd reason, that's what's making me so depressed right now. I'm desperately afraid of falling and this is one pretty big cliff edge I find myself on. If she pushes me I'm going to fall hard. For some reason God hasn't put a safety net down for me. The fucking bastard.
The alarm blares and Julian instantly sits up, coughing and sputtering. "Jesus, Harlan!" he sputters, after I manage to turn the alarm off. "That thing is loud enough! Suzanne's probably even awake now! Good God, man!"
I sit up and sigh, and I notice my rib cage protruding. "Nothing like a good hard blast of adrenaline at sunrise, eh Julian?"
"I called Allison," Julian yawned. "We talked for like three hours. She seems pretty cool. I'm supposed to meet her on the concourse today."
"What a coincidence," I answered sarcastically as I swung out of bed. "I'm supposed to meet Sam at the same place."
We managed to get ourselves presentable and I made the strongest pot of coffee that I've ever had in my life. One sip and my heart was racing.
"Man," Julian said, watching my face as I took my first sip. "If that coffee makes you grimace like that it's gotta be some good shit." He grabbed it out of my hand. "Give me some." His eyes widened comically as he took a drink. "Is there smoke coming out of my ears? If you drink all of this you're going to be able to fly."
We walked out the front door and into the cool fall air. Alisa's wake was tonight. I was pretty sure that it was going to be a closed coffin. The coroner found that she had been killed, then raped. I shuddered just to think about it.
It was foggy out and the damp air made me feel even colder. I shivered and pulled my dark trenchcoat closer to my wiry body. Julian was uncharacteristically quiet as we walked. He was probably thinking of Alisa's murder as well.
Sam and Allison were waiting on the concourse just as promised. As we got nearer, I noticed that something was wrong. Sam was looking at me oddly, her eyes troubled. Their body language was weird. My heart literally stopped beating. She was probably going to tell me that she didn't want to see me anymore. She was going to cut me just like I had promised to do to myself. I was almost afraid to see her. I held my breath and kept walking.
She surprised me when she took me in an embrace. "Harlan, I just heard. I'm sorry."
I looked at her with an obviously puzzled expression. "Heard what?"
"You mean you don't know?" She asked, her eyes moistening. "Gary was badly hurt. He's in critical condition. Somebody beat him up. It's all over the school."
"Somebody hurt Vlad?" Julian asked, his face pale.
I felt the Screamer threatening to burst out, fucking explode all over the school.
"Ross is dead," I whispered through my teeth. "I'm going to kill him."
I saw the way Samantha looked at me and I didn't like it. The words cold, without emotion. She saw a side of me that she hadn't guessed existed. I noticed that I was squeezing her arm and I instantly stopped.
Critical condition.
Ross Morrissey had gone way over the line. Critical condition to me means with intent to kill. Vlad didn't deserve to be killed. It could have been Julian.
Or me.
That morning in homeroom the principal had a little speech to give. "I'm sure by now that all of you have heard about Gary Decker. Witnesses said that he was attacked by a group of men and the police are looking into it right now. Hopefully, they will have some arrests by the end of the day. There is some good news, though—the hospital says there is a decent chance that his condition will be upgraded to serious. Our prayers are definitely with him and I would like to have a brief moment of silence on his behalf. Thank you."
I could feel myself burning. Was that a joke? It was good news to be in serious condition?
I knew with complete certainty that Ross had been responsible. Ross and his football throwing Neanderthals. Payback is going to be such a fucking bitch, Ross. You wait and see.
The bell rang and I entered the hall of teeming teenagers, all of them rushing to first period class. I kne
w exactly where Ross would be.
Mr. King of the senior bench was exactly where I thought. When I saw his fingers were bandaged, I just totally lost it. It meant to me that he had definitely been the one who hurt Vlad. He was sitting there on the bench, his mouth open in laughter. My hands were almost on his throat when I felt myself being dragged backwards.
"Harlan, no," Julian hissed in my ear. "This is not the place. You'll only get expelled."
Everybody parted around us like a biblical Red Sea. It was just Julian holding me back and Ross only five feet in front of me. Ross was smiling like a shark, his eyes burning from under his hairless brow. I pushed Julian back and Ross and I stood there staring at each other. The hallway seemed silent, although I know there must have been noise.
"I'm going to make you sorry, Ross," I hissed. "I'm going to make you wish you were a fucking corpse. I promise you."
"What's the matter, Sexton," Ross said, his sickening smile still frozen under his face. I thought he looked nervous, with the crowd watching us. "Your faggot friend fall down and get hurt? That's such a shame. I'm so sorry to hear that. You know how delicate those faggots are. They break easy. They need to be careful."
"I promise you," I said once again and then I turned and walked away.
I spent the rest of the day in a daze. Many students walked up to me and asked if I had really threatened Ross, but I just ignored them. The one bright spot was lunch with Samantha. She was very supportive at a time when I really needed her. She didn't ask me to talk about it.
Me and Julian went directly to the hospital from school. It was only a fifteen-minute walk. Vlad had suffered a fractured skull and a two broken ribs. Some police officers questioned me and Julian before they let us see him, but we said nothing about Ross. I wanted to pay him back on my own. If Vlad died then we would have definitely told them everything I knew. Vlad also said nothing to the police.
When they finally let us into Vlad's room I was shocked by his appearance. His face was little more than a swollen lump with a bandage over his head. One eye was completely glued shut, while the other one was filled with blood. He blinked when we walked in indicating he was awake.
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