by Dee, Maria
Just as I thought I had ditched Orion, he appeared before me around the south exit of the building.
“Why are you running?” he asked, composure intact.
“Why are you following?”
“Because you dropped your phone—here,” he devilishly grinned, handing it back. “I swiped it from that human—it was too easy. I didn’t expect for you to react that way.”
“What were you thinking? I’d raise a hand and ask you to stop undressing me with your mind? I’d look like a total basket case!”
“As long as you withhold the goods,” he grazed my cheek with his finger, “from Endeca that is, I’ll have to bombard your mind with images alike. With an open portal anything goes. We can even hear each other’s unconscious desires if permitted.”
“They’re unconscious desires for a reason. Forbidden, and somewhere in my twisted psyche, you’ve wheeled your way in, but that’s all it is, and ever will be.”
Orion was visibly infuriated by my response. His darkened eyes looked deeper into mine, searching for an in. I shut them, and pushed him away.
“The immorta of Endeca are pissed and you better think of something fast or they’ll be after you, one by one; you’ll wish for my version of torture after you’ve met them all,” he warned, discolored by my shut down. “You’re not the only one inconvenienced here, you know. Do you have any idea how many fragments are displaced and how much overtime we’ve been putting through these days?”
“I’m aware but while I’m on campus, I’m your average girl who’s all about her academia and less about shuttling fragments. Nyxta let me go, why can’t you?”
“I’ve known Nyxta for centuries and she isn’t in your favor, Xenia. She is up to something and where your safety is concerned, I’d highly reconsider uniting Endeca.”
Calliope and Marla were in eyesight.
“I-I should go. My friends are waiting.”
“If you cared about your friends, you’d—”
Rage boiled from within me and this unknown power allowed me to shove him against the wall, breaking his train of thought. “Don’t…ever…mention my friends again, Orion,” I violently said.
“Did you just rough me up? I think I quite enjoyed that,” his wry smile grew with every second my hand remained on his chest. He furrowed his brow in wonderment. “Do it.”
I shook my wayward head. Get out of my head!
“Go. Now,” I whispered, as the girls approached from around the corner.
Orion smirked, fixing his jacket before leaving.
“Geez, why’d you bounce?” Marla asked, quizzically.
“I-I had a…panic attack. About the paper that I have yet to write.”
“Speaking of which, let’s get to it, sister,” said an endearing Calliope.
“I can help too, Xeni. Lessen the research load for ya.”
“That’d be fantastic! I’d never ask you to spend your free time helping me with my paper that’s due before five, but if you insist,” I feigned innocence, pouting.
It was nice living in the present. The thought of yesterday and tomorrow were virtually nonexistent, while we worked under pressure to pump out a two thousand-word paper on any topic relating to mental health and the socioeconomical impact. I researched generalized anxiety and workdays lost. Marla helped with the annotated bibliography and I sighed in utter relief.
“Finally. I’d finished and with twenty minutes to spare. You done, Cal?”
“I’ve been done for the past half hour,” she scoffed, flashing her pearly whites. “I was filling my cart with shoes.”
“How nice. Then you wouldn’t mind handing in the hard copies?”
“Yes, I’d mind—very much so. I have someplace to be. Marla can hand them in.”
“Nuh-uh. Sorry, I’m meeting with Landon,” she stood up, sliding on her jacket and motioning to Landon waiting by the entrance. “You’re officially done. Bibliography attached and the document is delivered. Just drop off the hard copy in the psych office.”
The thought of dropping it off was making my stomach churn. The prospects of running into Orion were against my favor.
“Lates,” Marla chirped, with an extra kick in her step.
“Ciao bitches,” Calliope followed suit, sauntering off.
I cringed, and reminded myself to take slow, even breaths. The worst had past…I hoped. Would Orion really keep mentally harassing me?
Feeling on edge, I transitioned to the middle world, Styx, for a much-needed retreat. While there, I was painfully disturbed. My safe escape quickly turned into a nightmare. Images of Corlissa’s eerie doll resurfaced as I rested in a meadow of beautiful flowers. Green leaves slowly fell from the sky grazing my body before thundering flashes of Daisy consumed me. These images came from within me. I gasped unable to sit up as vines wrapped around my wrists, pinning me to the earth. The next image panned in so close, leading me into the darkness of Daisy’s glass eye. I held my breath, petrified with what I saw next. It was a little girl shrieking for help before the glass eye shattered leaving a hollow black space.
I sat up in trepidation, gasping for air, quickly transitioning back online to the only world I had known to be true. The transition was very quick and painful—something I had never endured the likes of. My insides felt a gravitational pull to what I would’ve imagined being a trip to the moon and back. As I re-inhabited my body online, I shuttered and immediately felt my stomach rise into my mouth. The churned contents of my stomach came up in a painful eruption. My hair was tied back, fortunately. I rested on my trembling hands and knees, steadying my rampant mind and stomach. Shortly after my breath steadied, my fragile fragment attained solace in every cell in my body once more.
‘Find the window to her fragment and you’ll see what I mean.’ Yes. It was all becoming clear to me. However, if Corlissa’s fragment was trapped in the doll, who was residing in Corlissa’s body? A succession of shivers travelled down my spine rendering my legs wobbly. I feared for the repercussion of it all.
It was definitely an omen of some sort and the only person with whom I could share this with was Kiran. Only meters away from the drop off office, Orion was nowhere to be seen, thankfully. In an instant, I dropped off the hard copy in the designated slot and quickly rushed out of the room, while others poured in behind me. The looks I received were those of concern and alarm. What? Try looking presentable after vomiting your guts out and succumbing to panic. Frantic and disheveled, I pressed on, averting the eyes of the few around me.
The cold air caressed my face and the bright sunlight quickly faded. I looked at my Cyclopod and dialed his number. It was time to settle things. Shit. Stupid voicemail. I left a discrete message, while I strolled through a busy campus.
“Kiran, where have you been? Call me when you get this. It’s about…Corlissa.”
Just as I approached my car, I got in and Kiran appeared in a snap. His face was somber as he swiftly slid into the passenger side. “I just got your message, but not through here,” he smirked, staring down at his phone. “Through here,” he said, signaling to his temple.
“Oh. Yes, Orion demonstrated that earlier today.”
“An open portal is pretty freaking fantastic, huh?” he said in his usual upbeat way.
“Listen, Kiran. I saw something…someone actually….in Corlissa’s doll.”
“This is about a doll?” he snorted, perplexed.
“Trust me. This isn’t just any old doll. It’s special. There’s some kind of energy force inside it that is undeniably important to her.” Whoever she…he…it was.
Kiran stood observing my divided, frantic self. I was immensely shaken up by it. Yeah, it seemed fitted.
“Don’t you see? Corlissa returned but not as herself. Whatever is in that doll could be the reason why.”
“A doll? That’
s…”
“Crazy, I know, but why else would your own sister snub you at the summoning of Endeca? It’s not really her and you know it.”
Kiran sighed, equally confounded. It was evident, even at the summoning that his sister was irretrievable. He quietly welcomed the denial and isolation that set in, and it appeared he had progressed to the next stage of loss and grief. Anger.
“Don’t mention this to anyone,” he cautioned. He quickly exited my car and I followed.
“Kiran, wait. I can show you what I saw and then you’ll see that I’m not lying.” I forced the images through his thick skull to only have them propelled back. We stood in an impasse, while flocks of students passed us by.
No access permitted?
Back. Off. Xenia.
You need to see this, Kiran!
“Why are you leaving?” I shouted after him. Maybe denial better suited Kiran but not for me—I had to uncover the darkness to find the light again or at least do it for my friend. Maybe what I saw was an illusion of the middle world, toying with my senses and getting back at me for not bringing unity to Endeca. Too many maybes filled my head, and I hoped that Kiran would one day soon, ask me to share my recollections, however frayed they were. Just in the event…
Nicholas was right about Kiran’s devastation. He appeared stark but the look in his eyes revealed he had lost his sister for good. On the surface, denial was proving to be more powerful than I had ever imagined. While Kiran refused to acknowledge his denial, I was well aware of my own; however, it seemed easier to help someone else deal with his or her demons than to address my own.
It was a beautiful day and I decided to immerse myself in the present, letting go of everything on my mind and the weight on my shoulders. I started to walk home and I knew Calliope and Marla would pick me up along the way, however far I got. I VT’d Marla and walked through campus exiting by a very busy street.
Resurrection 101
My wireless buds secured comfortably to the contour of my ears, drowning out the city sounds of loud cars and trucks. I felt my phone vibrate in my sweater pocket—it was Marla, just as I suspected.
“Hey Z. Where you be?”
“Cute. I’m approaching-” was all I said before Marla jumped in.
“Never mind. I GPS’ed your ass—found ya,” she snickered. “Why’d you leave? Are you okay?” She sensed there was something wrong and indeed, there was. I attempted to walk away the darkness that kept to my skin like day light. I was slowly coming to terms with it and because of that, it lurked by my shadow instead. The distance was gratifying, although I would’ve given anything for it to disappear. Well, not anything.
“It’s such a beautiful day, I thought I’d clear my head,” I said, not a full stretch from the truth.
“I seeeeeeee youuuu,” Marla bellowed playfully as a car slowed down beside me.
“Hey sexy! Get your fine ass in the car before some stranger tries to lure you in with candy,” Calliope hollered.
I grinned at the thought. How unfortunate it’d be for him. Was it so wrong that I liked feeling powerful, liberated, and otherworldly? After all, I had the toolkit, I just needed to learn how to play with the tools.
“Come on, Z. Hop in already,” an impatient Calliope wined.
“We have twizzler’s.” Marla waved two twizzler’s in the air before biting into one.
“Ou, twizzler’s!” I ran up to the slowly moving convertible and hopped into the back.
I embraced the wind against my skin and hair as Calliope revved the engine taking off.
“Patiently waiting for twizzler’s, please,” I reminded, and she handed the bag over. I chewed away, biting the hard ends off one piece—they were very addictive.
The sun was setting beautifully—my favorite part of the day. We said our goodbyes as Calliope drove off and Marla and I parted in opposite ways down the street, turning back to wave to one another. I liked these routines because familiarity was comfort. This unknown miracle, if that’s what it was, had become my life ever since meeting Nicholas; it was both exhilarating and overwhelming at times. Marla and Calliope served as my crutch—they kept me grounded, kept me, me.
My parents were home by the sounds stemming from the kitchen. I felt famished and the smell of home cooked food quickly stirred my stomach into a whirlwind of hunger. I jovially greeted, “Howdy parents.”
“Xeni, you just missed dinner,” said Marlon, my father.
“I’ll heat you up a plate,” offered Chrysanthe, my mother, slowly rising from her chair. Her wine glass left with a hint of red.
“Thanks!” I grabbed both parents and hugged them tightly.
“How nice. To what do we owe this show of affection?” My mother was befuddled.
“It just feels good to be here,” I heaved of sigh of relief. Alive.
“College life can be hectic at times so just know that you can talk to us any time you feel overwhelmed—we’re here for you.”
“Thanks, Dad.” For a split second, I acquiesced to the offer before a vision of a white room with padded walls stopped me; Kiran’s cautionary whispers lingered in my ear. He was right. “Me, overwhelmed? Not a chance,” I said, feigning a smile.
I quickly ate leaving no open window for discussion. Once I cleared my plate, I rinsed it off and slipped it into the dishwasher with the others. By that time, my parents were entwined in one another, sitting on the sofa watching television.
On the second floor, I drew a hot bath. My body felt battered from my earlier unwelcomed trip to Styx. While the water ran, I went back into my room, scanning missed messages on my Cyclopod. Just as I opened an email, I felt a cold draft against my lower back giving me shivers.
A cold, large hand covered my mouth and a broad arm wrapped around my torso.
“Shh! Don’t be alarmed,” he whispered, while holding me securely before slowly releasing his grip.
“It’s you! What’re you doing here?” I gasped, while he moved to the edge of my desk.
“Please forgive me. I didn’t mean to frighten you.”
“You could’ve called, Edric,” I snapped, waving my phone in the air. My quickened heartbeat slowed, allowing the panic to dissipate. “I almost didn’t recognize you with clothes on.”
“I don’t have one of those,” he said, looking at my Cyclopod as though he had never seen one before. “Can we talk? I could wait until after you’ve had your bath.” He sat in the desk chair, crossing his leg awkwardly and then straightening it, trying to acclimate.
“Let’s chat now. The bath can wait.”
“Very well. I’ve come here to explain myself. I’m not some abomination even though that’s what Orion believes.” His brazen smile was oddly familiar.
Edric looked a lot like his brother—exceptionally rugged, tall and handsome. I wasn’t sure if it was Edric’s smile or the mention of his name, but I involuntarily blushed.
“When I was a boy in Sweden, our family was accosted by three gypsies, or so we thought. One in particular read my fortune, which was rather alarming. She had said I would live to an old age, however my youth would never fade. For a time, there’d be darkness but not to worry. I would be lifted by the one who is known to the Gods, inviting to the universe, and the key to all humankind,” he paused, looking at me. “That’s you.”
“Err. Me? Why do you think that?” My eyes were wide with astonishment.
“I know that. Once I resurrected, I was immediately drawn to you. You possess this aura that everyone else must have grown accustom to. After spending a century in the darkness, I returned to this world, in an alley filled with people, some familiar like my brother who betrayed me, and unfamiliar like yourself. Xenia, it took all my strength to not ravage everyone insight and then when I laid eyes on you, the urge subsided—for a short while, anyhow.”
“Yeah, Orion gets on everyone’s nerves,” I said, lightening the mood.
“Orion is Orion,” he muttered, furrowing his brow. “I came here tonight because I wanted to repay you for bringing me back.”
“I’m not so sure that it was me. Corlissa said it was our union.”
“You were the missing link, Xenia. Without you…” he said, suddenly withdrawn.
“Were you in hell?” I squeaked surprising myself.
“I’m not sure,” he mused. “There was no fire and no devil. It was my own private obscure cell.”
“Sounds like a first class ticket to hell, having the privacy and all,” I uttered. “Or maybe heaven is bleak?” I asked although I had never really contemplated the existence of an afterlife let alone its depictions.
“As long as the portal remains open, the rest of them will not surrender. They’ll find you and try to persuade you.”
“I can’t surrender, Edric,” I said, near to tears.
“Trust me, I get it. However, I also understand where the others are coming from. We’re immorta and to us the notion of living with an expiry date isn’t very appealing. I’m not here to try and convince you otherwise, Xenia. It would do no good. I wanted you to hear my side,” he said, continuing reluctantly, “Back then I had an opportunity to save Orion. He was a spy for the E-SOM and Nyxta uncovered it. She gave him the death sentence. As you know, I intervened in his place.”
“How…noble of you,” I commented, uncertain of a more suitable response.
“Prophesy revealed that I would return from the darkness and so I thought this was it. I’d consume Orion’s darkness knowing that I’d return one day.”
“Did it ever occur to you they could’ve been bat crazy women who made it all up?”
“That was the risk I was willing to take. We all know what good that did. Alas, he’s my brother. I had to look after him. But after I had learned upon rising that he continued associating with the E-SOM, I knew our blood bond meant very little to him.”