She pulled her SUV under a canopy of trees and killed the engine. Before he could pull on his door handle, Megan reached over the console and gripped his hand.
“No pressure, Cam.” Her eyes held his; her unpainted lips called to him. “I just wanted to get away and relax. You’ve been tense the whole way here.”
“I wouldn’t say tense,” he defended himself.
Megan laughed, smacked a brief kiss on his lips and patted his arm. “You’re right. Not tense. Terrified. Now help me get the stuff out of the back.”
Cameron had no choice but to follow her around to the back and pull out the basket she’d hidden beneath a large red blanket. Allowing her to lead the way, Cameron had a hard time keeping his eyes off the sway of the hem of her skirt as the lace edge shifted against her skin. He knew firsthand how silky she felt, how perfectly his fingertips slid over her.
Those damn cowgirl boots were only adding to his arousal. She was so modest, so small-town girl, yet everything about her called to him on a level so primal and carnal she’d probably be terrified if she discovered just how much he craved her.
Beyond the physical pull he had toward her, Megan was the only woman who made him want more for his personal life. She was the only woman who inspired him to want to make the impossible actually work.
“I can practically hear you thinking,” she called without looking back. “You’re not relaxing.”
Megan stopped near the edge of the pond. After giving the folded blanket a jerk, she sent it floating down over the grass. Cameron set the basket down and took a seat. She was right. The weather was rather warm for this time of year and he doubted they’d have many days like this left. Taking advantage of the time was a great idea. Now he just had to figure out how to remain in control here.
“For your information, I’m more relaxed now than I have been in weeks,” he told her as he flipped the lid on the basket.
Easing down onto the blanket, Megan shifted her legs to her side and smoothed her skirt around her knees. “Liar. You’ve barely said a word. That tells me you’re analyzing something.” She pulled out two bottles of water. “Most likely you’re overthinking us.”
Us. They were an us at this point whether he wanted to admit it or not.
Megan continued to pull out items from the basket, as if discussing their confusing relationship with the surmounting tension was an everyday occurrence. Grapes, slices of bread, peanut butter, chips and cookies were all scattered around the blanket before he felt confident enough to speak.
Damn it. He was police chief, for pity’s sake. He’d put up with quite a bit in his years on the force, dealt with even more before that when he’d been in the army. Yet here he was, trying to find the right words, the courage to talk to Megan as if nothing had changed.
Everything mattered where she was concerned. That’s why he was so nervous about hurting her.
“Can I be honest?” he asked.
Her hand froze in the middle of smearing a generous amount of peanut butter onto a slice of bread. Her eyes lifted to his as a slow smile spread across her face.
“You must really be torn up about something. You’ve never asked permission to do anything and I’ve never known you to lie to me.” She quirked an arched brow. “Have you lied to me?”
That smile held in place, and he knew she was joking. Little did she know how close she was to the truth. He had lied to her—by omission. He’d kept a secret that would most definitely crush her. And that was just the one about her brother, never mind the truth behind his feelings toward her.
“Okay,” she muttered as she went back to making a sandwich. “Apparently your lack of smile or response tells me all I need to know. I never thought you’d actually lie to my face.”
Cameron reached out, wrapping his hand around her slender wrist until she looked at him again. “There are things I can’t tell you, Megan. You know that. Right now I wanted to talk about what’s going on with us. I know you wanted me to relax, but I can’t when there’s so much between us that we’re both trying to ignore.”
“Oh, I’m not ignoring anything,” she countered. “I’m giving you space to come to grips with the fact we slept together.”
A soft breeze filtered through, picking up the curled ends of her hair and sending them dancing. Those silky strands had slid all over his body, he’d threaded his fingers through them, and right now he itched to touch her intimately once again.
“I handled that entire situation wrong,” he told her, releasing her wrist.
She reached for another slice of bread and put it on top of the peanut butter. When she offered him the sandwich, he shook his head and started making his own.
“You were so vulnerable,” he started, still recalling exactly how she’d trembled. “I was, too, for that matter. I’d hit a breaking point, though. I couldn’t hold back anymore.”
Megan swallowed a bite of her sandwich, reached for a bottle of water and took a drink before responding. “I don’t understand why you denied either of us for so long when we wanted the same thing.”
“Because in the end we don’t want the same thing,” he corrected her. “You know my stance on serious relationships, and I know you want a family. We’re better off as friends, and I never meant to cross the line because now we’re having a damn hard time finding our way back.”
Megan plucked off a grape and popped it into her mouth. “There’s no reason to turn back. Unless you think sleeping with me was a mistake.”
The way her green eyes held his, the way so many questions stared back at him, Cameron found himself shaking his head. “No. That wasn’t a mistake. I didn’t plan on it, but no way could I call what happened a mistake.”
“But you don’t want it to happen again.”
She couldn’t be more wrong. “It can’t happen again. Big difference.”
With a cocky smile, she went back to her sandwich. He had no clue what that smile meant; more than likely he’d find out because he had no doubt she was plotting something. Cameron finished his sandwich and dived right into the BBQ chips, his favorite. She always kept them on hand for him at her house.
And it was all those little things that added up to make a giant impact on his life.
“So how did you know this property is for sale?” Cameron stretched his legs out in front of him, resting his hands behind his back.
Megan started putting the leftover food back into the basket. “I have a coworker whose sister is the Realtor. She told me I could come anytime and fish or swim until the property sold. I guess the land was their parents’ and now the sisters don’t want it, so they’re selling it and splitting the profit.”
Cameron looked around at all the old oak trees, the perfectly shaped pond, complete with a small dock for fishing or jumping off. He could practically picture a large, two-story cabin-like home off in the distance on the flat stretch of land.
“Beautiful, isn’t it?” she asked.
Cameron glanced back to her. “It is.”
He watched as her eyes surveyed the land, saw a soft smile settle on her face. Such a look of happiness and contentment.
“You want this land, don’t you?”
Blinking, she met his gaze and shrugged. “Who wouldn’t? It’s just another daydream, though.”
He wanted her to have this, wanted her to achieve all those dreams because her entire life she’d put everyone ahead of her own needs. He knew she’d already fantasized about having a family here, kids running through the field and jumping off a dock into the pond. “Buy it,” he told her. “Nothing is holding you back. Buy this land and it will be here when you’re ready to build.”
Megan lay on her back, her head on his thigh and her booted ankles crossed. She laced her fingers over her abdomen and stared up at the sky.
“There’s so much holding me back.” Her reply came on a soft sigh as she smiled. “I just want to lie here and pretend for a bit longer. I love the sound of absolute nothing. There’s something so peac
eful, so perfect about it. Like the world is one big happy place.”
Her eyes drifted closed, and Cameron’s heart broke for her. All she’d ever wanted was for everyone around her to be happy and have a peaceful life. She wasn’t naive by any means, but Cameron wondered if she truly believed she could make that happen. The woman was relentless; she’d try to help everyone she knew or she’d go down swinging.
Unable to keep his hands from her another moment, he smoothed her hair away from her face, trailing his fingertip down along her shoulder. “What’s holding you back from buying?” he asked.
He knew she was extremely frugal with her finances and she rarely bought anything for herself. Her house and SUV were both paid off. She wasn’t a shopper like some women he knew.
Those bright green eyes focused on his. Sometimes looking at her physically hurt him, because he knew one day she’d find the one. She’d settle down and marry, probably have children. And all that happiness was exactly what he wanted for her. He just couldn’t be the one to supply her needs.
“I may be moving.”
Cameron’s hand stilled, and the fine strands of her hair slid right out of his fingers. “You’re moving?”
“I haven’t decided yet.”
All Cameron could do was stare. The air seemed a bit thicker as the severity of her words hit him like a punch to the stomach. He hadn’t seen this coming, and it took a lot to send his shock factor gauge soaring.
“Where would you be moving?” he asked.
“Memphis.”
Almost two hours away. Not terribly far, but not down the street, either, as he’d grown used to. He’d already told himself he couldn’t have his job and her. Something had to give. He just hadn’t been prepared to let her go so far. Damn it, he didn’t want this, but she had to make her own choices.
“I was offered a position at a new facility,” she told him, her tone soft as if she was afraid to go into details. “That’s where I was when I went out of town.”
Nodding, Cameron rested his hand at his side. “Did you like the place?”
Why did the selfish part of him want her to say she hated it? Why did he hope she would turn this opportunity down? Hadn’t he just told himself he wanted to see her happy, to see all her wishes and dreams come true for once?
Yet here he was, craving her, knowing he wouldn’t give in to his own desires all because he wanted her to live the life she deserved and not be tied to the stress and obligations of being with a cop.
“I did.” Megan focused back on the sky as the sun took cover behind a large white cloud. “There’s just so many pros and cons no matter what decision I make.”
“You need to do what’s best for you, not what’s best for everyone else.”
There, that was the right thing to say. Still, the thought of her leaving was like a vise on his heart. He didn’t want her to go, but he wouldn’t sway her decision unless she asked his opinion. Even then, he wouldn’t tell her to stay because he selfishly couldn’t stand the thought of going days or even weeks without seeing her.
She was obviously just as torn or she would’ve told him her decision sooner. “Have you talked to Evan about the move?”
Megan sighed. “No. On one hand, I think leaving and having him come with me would be the fresh start he needs. On the other hand, I don’t know that he would come.”
Cameron really wished he could tell her that most likely Evan would be in jail before long.
“Don’t let Evan factor into this,” he commanded, a little harsher than he’d meant to.
Megan’s eyes snapped to his. “How can I not?” she asked, jerking up into a sitting position. The way she twisted to confront him had their faces within inches of each other. “He’s my only family, and he needs me.”
“He needs to help himself for once.”
Anger flashed through her eyes. “I won’t fight with you about this again. You love Eli and Drake no matter what they do, and I love Evan no matter how much he screws up. He’s still my brother.”
Cameron wasn’t about to state the obvious, that Evan wasn’t near the men Eli and Drake were. Megan knew exactly how those three men lived their lives.
Tamping down his worry and frustration, Cameron lifted his hand to her cheek. Stroking his thumb along her soft skin, he held her gaze.
“I want you to make a decision that is strictly selfish,” he told her. “I want you to do whatever you want without thinking of the consequences, without thinking of who will be hurt or angry. What does Megan want?”
Without a word, she shifted away and came to her feet. Toeing off her cowgirl boots, she kept her eyes locked on to his. In a move he hadn’t seen coming, she lifted the hem of her skirt and pulled the dress over her head, tossing the garment to the side. Seeing her standing before him in a simple white cotton bra and panties shouldn’t have turned him on as much as it did, but every single thing about Megan had his body responding.
“What are you doing?” he asked, cursing his raspy voice.
Reaching around to unfasten her bra, Megan let the straps slide down her arms. “I’m making a selfish decision. Right now, I want to go lay at the edge of the pond and get lost in a fantasy.” She met his gaze as she hooked her thumbs in her panties and pulled them down. “With you.”
He’d never been one to turn away from a challenge. No matter how many warnings blared through his head, there wasn’t a man alive who would turn Megan Richards away.
Even with the high, full trees, sunlight filtered through and seemed to land right on the perfect body she’d placed on display for him.
“What if someone sees us?” he asked.
Megan laughed. “Well, we’re pretty secluded and nobody is around. We’ll hear a car if it comes up the road. Plus I’m the only one naked, so I guess I’m the only one who should worry about being seen. Am I right?”
She quirked a brow and turned away, heading toward the deck. Cameron came to his feet and began to strip, all the while watching that soft sway of those rounded hips.
There would be no good outcome to this story. Not one. He figured he might as well enjoy every moment with her that he could, because once those warrants came through, Megan would not be throwing those sassy, sultry smiles his way any longer. She’d look at him with disdain, and the thought crushed him.
Right now, he wanted to feel her in his arms, wanted to show her he truly did love her...even if he could never say the words aloud and mean them the way she needed him to.
Chapter Sixteen
Out of all the spontaneous things she’d done in her life, not that there had been many, making love with Cameron out in the open without a care in the world had to top the list.
Come to think of it, making love with Cameron had topped any and all lists she’d ever made or ever would make.
As Megan pulled into her drive after dropping Cameron off, she realized they’d been out much later than she’d meant and she hadn’t left a porch light on. The street lamp was enough for her to see, but she still hated coming home to a dark, empty house.
She didn’t regret one moment of today, though. Spending the day with Cameron, not worrying about Evan or how this change in her and Cam’s dynamic would affect their friendship was quite refreshing.
Speaking of refreshing, her body still tingled as she recalled how Cameron had lifted her naked body against his and walked into the water. The water had been surprisingly warm. When Cameron had knelt down, with her wrapped all around him, and made love to her as the water lapped at their waistlines, she’d fallen completely in love with him. The moment had been perfect, the man even more perfect. And she knew she’d loved him all along, but that moment, that beautiful, special moment, had opened her eyes to what was truly happening between them.
Megan pulled into the garage, grabbed the basket from the trunk and headed to the back door. Holding up her keys toward the glow from streetlights, Megan squealed when a shadow of a man stood on her back steps.
“It’s just
me.”
Heart pounding nearly through her chest, Megan gripped her keys and the basket. “Evan, you scared me to death. Why are you out here in the dark?”
“Can I stay here? At least for tonight?”
Megan stepped forward, still unable to see him very well. “Of course you can. You’re my brother.”
He shrugged. “I just...I didn’t know after the other night.”
“Let’s get inside and then we’ll talk.”
She opened the back door and ushered him in ahead of her. After flicking on the kitchen light and setting the basket on the dinette table, she turned to Evan.
“What happened?” she asked, examining his swollen eye and cut lip. This looked far worse than the injury from the other day. And this was the other eye because the other one still sported a fading purple bruise.
Evan sank into a wooden chair at the table. “Wrong place, wrong time. Story of my life.”
She wanted to tell him he’d written his own story and it was never too late to start a new chapter, but she figured all that psychoanalyzing would only irritate him even more. It would be the equivalent of teaching a drowning person to swim. Not the time.
So, for now, she’d tend to his wounds and listen. He was here because he felt safe, and she wasn’t about to run him off with all the questions swirling around in her mind or by scolding him like a warden.
“Let me get my first-aid kit.”
By the time she came back, Evan had flipped the lid off the basket and was making a sandwich.
“I can make you real food if you’re hungry.” She sat in the chair at the head of the table and checked the supplies in the kit. “I know I have some spaghetti and a quesadilla I could heat up.”
Evan shook his head. “This will be fine.”
After pulling out the things she needed to fix Evan up, she turned toward him. “I only have one question.”
From Best Friend to Bride Page 13