Commitment

by Healy, Nancy Ann

  “Yeah, I probably have last minute requests,” Alex joked. She waited for the door to close and picked up the phone. “This is Alex,” she said lightly.

  “Better get extra cupcakes,” Krause replied.

  “Yeah. Well, that might be a good idea, actually. Seems we have extra company,” she answered.

  “Who?”

  “Not sure,” she said.

  “Where?”

  “O’Brien sent home a present with Dylan,” she responded.

  “Is he all right?” Krause asked immediately. Alex let out a sigh. “Cassidy?” Alex let out another audible breath. “Alex?”

  “We need to talk.” Now it was Krause’s turn to release his tension in a sigh. “You with Callier?” she asked.

  “Yeah,” he responded. “Can you tell?” he asked. “Can you tell whose it is?”

  “It’s not CIA or NSA issue. If it is, I’ve never seen it. God knows I’ve seen enough of them. It’s subtle. Most people would never have noticed it.”

  “How did you…”

  “Dylan threw it. Toy truck. Broke it in a couple of places. Just in the right place. A tiny shiny piece behind a wire that doesn’t quite match,” she paused. “Listen, I don’t like this. Brackett is on her way to London. Tate said something to Fallon about you and me; something to the effect that people didn’t want us to find each other.” Alex listened to the marked silence filling the line. “Now, O’Brien shows his face all of a sudden, making overtures toward Dylan…”

  “What kind of overtures?” Krause asked.

  “Threats,” Alex answered. “We both know that this is not about Dylan.”

  “Shit…Alex…Callier just told me that Dimitri is headed to London as well.”

  “Great.” Alex pinched the bridge of her nose and released it. Her father’s letter was plaguing her thoughts, and if she was right, it was at the center of Cassidy’s now as well. “There’s something else….my father….Pip, he…”

  “Alex….”

  “He left a letter for Cassidy,” Alex whispered through the line.

  “What?” Krause asked.

  “Yeah, I know…listen we need to talk face to face.”

  “I agree,” he said quietly.

  “You think you can get Mitchell on Brackett; subtly?” Alex wondered.

  “Yeah. They want us to follow her to London,” he observed.

  “So, where don’t they want us?” Alex asked.

  Krause looked over toward Callier, who was leaning against the wall. “Good question. Can you get here this weekend?”

  “France?” Alex asked.

  “Yes.”

  Alex let out a heavy sigh. “I don’t….”

  “Dylan?” he asked. There was no response. Krause was hoping to bring Alex to Callier, but the lack of response from his partner told him everything he needed to know. “I’ll be back Saturday. The train station.”

  “All right,” Alex agreed.

  “Alex, leave it on…don’t let them know you found…”

  “I won’t. I think we should give them something to think about,” she replied.

  “You want to plant false information,” Krause surmised.

  “Yes, I do.”

  “All right. I’ll see what more I can learn here. Alex….”

  “Yeah?”

  “In that letter was there anything about….”

  Alex closed her eyes. “We’ll talk when I see you Saturday,” she said softly.

  “Yeah. Just be careful,” he reminded her.

  “You too,” she said, disconnecting the call with a sudden feeling that there was something more Jonathan Krause wanted to say. Alex mentally stored the conversation away and walked back to the counter. ‘Never too cautious’ was her motto now. “Seems I’ll need another couple of cupcakes,” she explained.

  lex shut off the light and pulled Cassidy into her arms.

  “How are you doing?” she asked.

  “Better now,” Cassidy sighed.

  “I want you to go with Dylan to your mom’s. I’ll pick you up there Saturday night.”

  Cassidy propped herself up on her elbow. “Are you worried he might try something with Dylan?”

  “No, I’m not,” Alex assured as she pulled Cassidy back into her arms. “I’m curious about who he is trying to impress though. And, I have a few things to take care of,” she whispered. “It will be easier if you are there; no curious eyes. I am worried about you and Dylan.” Feeling Cassidy tense Alex quickly clarified her meaning. “I’m not worried about your safety, Cass. I am worried about both of you emotionally. I just think it would be good for you both.”

  “Alex…”

  “I know. School. I know. It’s only two days, Cass.” Alex felt Cassidy tighten her hold. “What is it?”

  “I’ve been thinking; about Pip….about your father’s…”

  “Yeah. I know. Me too,” Alex admitted.

  “I know it’s not,” Cassidy sat up slightly to regard Alex in the faint light. “I can’t believe I am about to say this.”

  Alex nodded her head in quiet understanding. “It’s not my first choice either. It does solve the immediate problem. And,” Alex stopped abruptly.

  “And what?” Cassidy urged.

  “Right now, I want Dylan to feel safe. It’s the best alternative. If we can show that O’Brien is not Dylan’s…”

  Cassidy blew out a heavy breath and laid back on Alex. “What do you think he’ll say?”

  “Pip?” Alex asked and felt Cassidy’s affirmative nod. “He loves Dylan as much as he loves you. John was like his brother. On some level I think he feels he is betraying that,” Alex said plainly. “That’s why I hate asking him. Doesn’t really make sense if I think about it, though.”

  “Why is that?” Cassidy asked, tracing light patterns over Alex.

  “John apparently agreed to this,” Alex paused. “And, Pip has proven it more than once. He’d do anything for you.”

  “Mmm,” was the only response.

  “What?” Alex asked.

  “I think you are missing something in that statement,” Cassidy offered.

  “I don’t think so. It was John’s idea. We both know Pip would do anything for…”

  “Yes, I know that,” Cassidy admitted. “It isn’t just me that he would do anything for.”

  “Well, of course not. Dylan is…”

  “No, Alex. You don’t see it,” Cassidy said.

  “See what?” Alex asked.

  “You and Pip. You can’t see it. You’re too close.”

  “What are you talking about?” Alex asked somewhat defensively.

  Cassidy chuckled softly. “Honey, I don’t know how it happened, but I’ve never seen you so comfortable with another person.”

  “You,” Alex answered.

  “Yes. That’s not what I meant, and you know it,” Cassidy scolded playfully. “You care about him.” Alex squirmed slightly beneath Cassidy and Cassidy giggled again. “Like it or not, Agent Toles, you and Pip are friends.” Alex sighed. She had admitted it to herself long ago, but she had never voiced it to anyone else. Cassidy heard another uncomfortable sigh escape her wife. “Why is that so hard for you?” she asked.

  “I don’t know,” Alex confessed. “For years at the NSA Jonathan Krause was on my radar as a player. There’s no logical reason I should trust him. Well, other than the fact that he would die before he let anyone hurt you.”

  “But?” Cassidy encouraged.

  “I don’t know. I just do.”

  “Just do what?” Cassidy asked.

  “Trust him,” Alex answered.

  “And?”

  “Should there be more?” Alex laughed.

  “You care about him,” Cassidy said plainly.

  “I….”

  “Alex, he’s your friend. Just like Brian…like Nick, like everyone you love, you worry about protecting him.”

  “He can take care of himself,” Alex observed.

  “Everyone needs someo
ne to take care of them sometimes, even Pip,” Cassidy said softly.

  “You’ve never told me much about your time in France,” Alex said.

  “No. I guess I haven’t,” Cassidy admitted. She exhaled forcefully and closed her eyes. “It was not exactly the best time in my life.” Alex stroked Cassidy’s hair and waited for her to continue. “I needed to get away. Studying abroad was the perfect solution.”

  Alex could feel the tension rising in Cassidy. “Get away from what?” she asked.

  “From Chris.”

  “Cass?” Alex was certain she could feel the heat of Cassidy’s tears through her T-shirt. “Please tell me he never hurt you.”

  “No. Not physically.”

  “Go on,” Alex encouraged.

  Cassidy shifted nervously and sighed. “It was right at the end of my junior year. Chris had already hinted at an engagement. I was,” Cassidy closed her eyes and struggled to continue.

  “What?” Alex asked softly. “You don’t have to tell me, Cass.”

  “It’s not that. I just…I don’t know, Alex. Looking back now, I just…sometimes I can’t understand why I stayed with him; why I married him at all.”

  “What happened?” Alex asked gently.

  “Oh, well…at first I was excited. He was already working in a large firm in San Francisco; making quite the name for himself. He can be quite charming; you know?” Alex remained silent, and Cassidy giggled. “No, I guess you don’t.” Cassidy patted her wife’s stomach. “You’ve only seen a glimpse of that. It’s the real Christopher O’Brien that you know.”

  Alex shook her head. “Cassidy….”

  “No, it’s true. I should have obeyed my instincts then. I went to visit him, unannounced of course. I thought it would be a surprise; you know? A romantic weekend before the summer break. I was excited. I had just gotten a job for the summer in this great little bohemian café. I had roommates lined up to share a small apartment in Haight-Ashbury.” Cassidy grew whimsical for a moment as her thoughts strayed. “I thought it would be perfect for me. I always had this crazy notion I would write a novel about two couples who met in the sixties and whose lives took different turns.” Alex smiled silently. She loved hearing Cassidy’s stories. She heard a dramatic sigh escape Cassidy’s lips and knew it signaled a change in emotion. “Anyway, I was excited to tell him. I thought that he would be happy for me. I would stay on the west coast for the summer instead of returning home,” she chuckled sarcastically.

  “But?”

  “Well, he flipped out. No wife of his was going to work in a dingy, liberal café. What was I looking to find? Men?” Cassidy took a deep breath. “I pointed out that we were hardly married and that I would do whatever I pleased.” Cassidy felt the slight jiggle beneath her and knew that Alex was chuckling. “Is that funny?”

  “No,” Alex answered. “I just can’t imagine anyone telling you what you could do.”

  “Mm. Well, I never enjoyed that. But, I wasn’t always the person I am now, Alex.” Alex understood that as well. “I was furious. I mean, really angry. He was angry. I don’t even remember everything he said. I do remember,” she stopped as she felt the knot in her stomach begin to make its presence known at the vivid memory. “He said that he would never marry a common whore.” Alex flinched at the words as they rolled off her wife’s tongue, but she remained silent and listened, knowing there was more. “I told him if I had become a whore then it was because he made me that way,” Cassidy’s voice dropped. Alex heard the soft whimper from Cassidy’s tears as they continued to fall. “I went to leave. He grabbed me. Hard. I screamed for him to let me go. He did. Then he swung his hand back. I kicked him in the shin, grabbed the door knob and ran out of his apartment.” Cassidy nestled closer to Alex. Alex held her gently; feeling the trembling in her wife’s body. “He shouted that he would never marry a whore anyway. I just kept going. I decided that next week to go to France. Didn’t take his calls. Didn’t see him until he showed up at my mother’s right before I left for Paris.”

  “I’m sorry, Cass.”

  “Yeah. Me too. I should have known.”

  “He never tried to hit you again?”

  “No. He had some harsh words now and again. But, no. The truth is, Alex, we hardly saw one another. It was…well,” Cassidy stopped briefly. “I guess, in some ways we used each other,” she admitted quietly.

  “I don’t think you are capable of that,” Alex reassured.

  “Knowingly? Maybe not. He was my first Alex. He offered me the world on a silver platter. I just…”

  “You were young,” Alex said.

  “I was selfish and stupid.”

  Alex sat up slightly and brought Cassidy to face her. “Cassidy. You may be many things; opinionated, strong, even temperamental,” Alex said as Cassidy raised her brow. “You are neither selfish nor stupid. There is not a soul who knows you that would describe you that way. Believe me.”

  “You’re bias,” Cassidy said.

  “No, I’m not.”

  Cassidy shook her head. “Well, there is one person that I think would…”

  “That asshole is no judge of anyone’s character. He has none himself,” Alex said bluntly. Cassidy smiled. “So, that’s why you went to France to study?” Cassidy nodded. “But you went back to him.” Cassidy shrugged. Alex let out a heavy sigh and pulled Cassidy into her arms. “No one has the ability of hindsight, sweetheart. If they did they would never learn anything,” Alex said. Cassidy laughed.

  “What?” Alex asked.

  “That’s something like what Pip said when I told him the story.”

  “Pip knows?” Alex asked.

  “Chris kept calling and I didn’t want to talk to him. I got drunk one night and unloaded it all on him; in French no less,” Cassidy chuckled.

  “Can’t imagine he was too thrilled by that story.”

  “No. Probably not. I don’t remember much more than that,” Cassidy confessed.

  “Cass?”

  “Hmm?”

  “Chris was your first? I mean, like the first person you…”

  “Yeah.”

  “And, John was just….that’s it; isn’t it? I mean other than me?” Alex asked a bit sheepishly.

  “Does that surprise you?” Cassidy asked. Alex just kissed her head. “Alex? Does that bother you?”

  “No,” Alex answered. “I just know how lucky I am.”

  “What are we going to do about him?” Cassidy’s voice was tinged with apprehension.

  “Whatever we have to,” Alex said definitively.

  “Pip?” Cassidy whispered.

  “If it comes to that, yes.”

  “I wish you were the first,” Cassidy barely whispered. “Sometimes I feel like you were.”

  Alex understood perfectly what Cassidy meant. “As long as I am the last,” she said, lightening the mood.

  “Promise,” Cassidy answered.

  “It will be all right. I promise,” Alex said as she closed her eyes.

  Saturday, December 13th

  Alex walked along the train tracks until she finally reached the cracked cement of the old platform. She was grateful that nature had chosen to hold the frequent New England snow at bay. This walk was no picnic in the best of conditions. It took the agent nearly forty minutes hiking through dense woods to reach the destination. She had to admit that Jonathan Krause had found the perfect meeting place. No one came here. Once in a while this place might see some kids that wanted to party or the occasional addict, neither of which posed any threat to what she and her new partner needed for privacy. Should anyone see them, they would likely surmise that the pair were law enforcement looking for a drug dealer and scurry quickly. She laughed softly as she approached the large room where she was certain to find her unlikely friend. “Waiting long?” she asked.

  Jonathan Krause turned and offered her a wry smile. “No longer than any of the other men in your life I suspect.”

  “Ouch,” Alex answered playfully. She sincerely
doubted that most people would believe Jonathan Krause had a sense of humor at all. It was one of the things that drew her closer to the man, even if his sense of humor was often at her expense. She understood the jabbing. It relieved tension for them both, and she could dish it back just as quickly when the mood struck her. “Well, don’t tell me you invited me to such a lovely place to discuss my track record with men,” she supplied.

  “Hardly,” he laughed. His features seemed to soften slightly as his voice followed suit. “How are you?” he asked with concern.

  Alex squinted with curiosity. It was not that it was unusual for Krause to ask the question, but she was certain she denoted something different in his demeanor and tone; something she could not quite put her finger on. “I’m all right.” Before Krause could ask another question, she continued. “Dylan and Cassidy are fine.”

  “Good. I had an interesting meeting with Edmond,” he said.

  “Anything more on my father? Any clue why he cut off those funds to ASA?”

  Krause forced a smile and shifted a bit. “No. Edmond was unaware that your father had done that. He didn’t seem overly concerned, but I don’t think he knows exactly why.”

  “And my father?”

  Krause nodded. “Some. Seems he was not always just a money broker,” he explained. Alex studied his face closely as he continued. “He was in the field for quite some time when your grandfather was still alive.”

  “My father was a field agent?” she asked in disbelief. Krause nodded. “A spook?”

  Krause could not help but smile and shake his head slightly. “Alex, you are a spook.” She huffed a bit and nodded. “There’s more,” he said.

  “What?”

  “His partner….”

  “Shit….just don’t tell me his partner was related to O’Brien or something. I swear…”

  “Seriously?” Krause mocked the idea. He stopped and then turned stoic. “No. Alex, his partner was my mother.”

  “You’re not kidding,” Alex said seriously. “Are you?” she asked. “Are you kidding?” she repeated. Krause shook his head.

  “Well, that explains them not wanting us to meet,” she surmised. She looked over to notice that the man before her seemed to find his shoes suddenly interesting. “Okay? What? That’s not all; is it?”