by Maisey Yates
At this point, she didn’t really blame him.
Wyatt, for his part, was trying to direct things. Because that was what he did. Bennett controlled his own life. He was steady, and responsible, while Wyatt was the wild card out of the brothers. Brash and bold, the oldest Dodge had never done anything according to convention.
But at Get Out of Dodge, he was definitely in charge. It was his place. He was the one with the vision for it. And she could see all of that reflected in the way that he kept things moving at dinner.
He was magnetic. A champion bull rider who had not only completed a record number of rides, but who had easily scored endorsement deals with his good looks. Wyatt was a force to be reckoned with. Always had been.
He was sexy as hell too. There wasn’t a single Dodge brother who wasn’t. But he had never appealed to Kaylee in the same way that Bennett did. Wyatt was much more rugged, scars on his face and body, and he possessed kind of an aggressive swagger and bravado that came with men like him. Cowboys who risked life and limb every day for a belt buckle and some money.
Bennett was rugged, but it was in a more low-key way. He had the kind of looks that almost would have been too pretty if it weren’t for his height, muscular build and the scars on his hands betraying the fact that he never shied away from manual labor.
Grant was handsome too, in that steady sort of way. Square jaw, brown eyes and a mouth that rarely smiled. The strong silent type was an understatement.
But it was Bennett, always had been, who had affected her physically. And she had gone and touched him twice in the space of the past hour. The whole drive over to the ranch had been fraught for her. Her thigh kept brushing up against his, and it...it affected her. She couldn’t pretend it didn’t.
Then in the living room...
She turned her focus back to the present.
“We are going to have a cleanup day over the weekend. I’ve enlisted the girls from Grassroots Winery to come over and share a meal with us, and then we’re going to go over the logistics of this partnership. After that, it’s going to be time to really whip the property into shape.”
“Women,” Jamie said crisply. “You will find that all of the females that work at Grassroots are women, Wyatt.”
“My mistake,” he said. “Though, if we’re going to be pedantic, a few women and a harpy.”
Grant chuckled. “Say that to her face sometime,” he said, meaning Lindy, the owner of the winery.
“No thanks,” Wyatt said. “I like my face as it is.”
“Hmm.” Jamie made a speculative sound. “Really? You do?”
“You’re awfully punchy tonight for someone whose paychecks I sign,” he said to his little sister.
She shrugged. “You need it. You need someone to keep you on your toes.”
“No. What I need is a dictatorship that goes unchallenged.”
“Sadly,” Grant said, “for you, this is a partnership.”
“We all own a piece of this ranch,” Bennett said, for Dallas’s benefit.
“Yes,” Wyatt agreed. “And it’s a pain in my ass sometimes.”
“Except that we all help you,” Grant supplied.
“Help is subjective.”
“Speaking of help,” Bennett said, looking at Wyatt meaningfully.
“Right,” Wyatt said, taking the cue. “I’d like to hire you to work at the ranch, Dallas. I’m going to pay you.”
Dallas looked surprised. “What?”
“Do you want a job?”
“Doing what?”
“Whatever the hell I ask you to do. Like I said, we are going to have a big cleanup day over the weekend. I’d like to start you then. Because we’ll have all hands on deck I can train you to do a few things. But I need a basic ranch hand. I have horses and other animals to take care of. Luke here just started his own ranch, so I don’t have as much help as I used to.”
That drew Kaylee’s attention back to Luke and Olivia. It was strange how being near them wasn’t really all that strange. She was used to being near Olivia and feeling a constant burning sensation. All that jealousy. But there was nothing to be jealous of now. She was with Luke. They were happy, clearly, in a way that Olivia had never been when she’d been with Bennett. She’d always seemed a little stressed and overly serious with Bennett. With Luke, she smiled. And he smiled back. They were in love. That was the difference. And if she felt any kind of jealousy it was...different.
Well, she had that dinner date with Michael coming up. Maybe she could fall in love with him.
The idea of that felt strange. Wrong.
Her place felt secure here at this table. With this family. Making a new one wasn’t even something she was sure she wanted.
But maybe that was the problem. Maybe the problem was that Bennett’s family had always been her surrogate family. And part of her feelings for him were wrapped up in that.
That was pathetic. She didn’t want to be pathetic.
Anyway, it didn’t matter how she felt. The Dodges felt like family sometimes, but it didn’t make her family. Sometimes watching them interact with each other made her feel like a kid with her nose pressed against the window of a toy store. All that wonder and glory and none of it for her.
Pathetic.
“That sounds...not terrible,” Dallas returned.
“We have to work schooling out,” Bennett said.
“The year is almost over.”
“I know,” Bennett said. “But we’re going to do everything we can to get you caught up so that you can move on to your sophomore year. Is that the grade you should be in?”
Dallas laughed. “Yeah.”
“Well, we’re going to do that. If there has to be some summer school, then there has to be summer school.”
“I’m not failing or anything. I should just be able to do the last few weeks at home.”
“Okay. Well, you made it sound like you were failing.”
Everyone at the table was watching the exchange with rapt interest. And Kaylee couldn’t deny that she found it pretty interesting herself. To watch Bennett assume this position. The way that he was dealing with Dallas was... Well, it wasn’t doing anything to calm her feelings down.
She had always thought he was the best man in the entire world. And this was only confirming it. If only he could be decent and have feet of clay. But no.
“Not failing.”
“Well, I’ll call the school and see what we need to do.”
The meal moved on, Wyatt gleefully listing the various tasks that Dallas would probably be made to do. She could see that at a certain point Dallas was a little bit overwhelmed. Not because his uncle was promising to make him dig holes for a fence, but because he had an uncle at all. He got quiet, no longer making mouthy asides to fill the silences.
“I’m getting tired,” she said softly.
“Oh, right,” Bennett said. “We rode together.”
Whether or not he realized that she was making the excuse for Dallas, she had a feeling that he was grateful for it.
“We have to go,” Bennett said, standing. “We all rode over together.”
“I have an early appointment,” she lied. “But thanks for dinner, Wyatt.”
“Yeah,” Wyatt said. “Thanks for...well, coming.”
She felt like he was actually thanking her for being here at all. For being there for Bennett.
Dallas’s shoulders sagged with relief once they told everyone goodbye and were outside on their way to the pickup truck.
“Are you okay?” she asked underneath the sound of their feet crunching on the gravel.
“Me?” Dallas asked.
“Yes,” she confirmed.
“Fine. Tired.”
Bennett didn’t say anything, he just got into the truck and started the engine. She and Dallas followed suit.
She had forgotten that she would end up sitting next to Bennett again. That her leg would be smashed up against his. The heat of his body seeping into hers. Suddenly, she was exhausted. It was all just...a lot. And she knew that Dallas wasn’t her responsibility, but it still felt weighty. Like something she was carrying, an extra burden, on behalf of her friend.
Bennett’s house was between Get Out of Dodge and the clinic. After making sure he was completely all right, Bennett dropped Dallas off at the house, telling him he wouldn’t be long, before heading back onto the highway to take Kaylee to her car.
“So I guess he has a job now,” Bennett said.
“Yeah,” Kaylee said, scooting all the way to the door, as far away from Bennett as she possibly could. Her leg still burned.
“I’m glad. I’m glad that he has something to keep him busy.”
“And something to give the two of you some distance?”
“It’s definitely a uniquely exhausting situation. And he’s not a toddler or anything. He doesn’t need constant care. But I feel like...I don’t know him. He’s a stranger. But I care about him. What’s going to happen to him. If he’s happy. And I don’t know how to gauge any of that. I don’t know how to control it. I hate not being in control, Kaylee. I really do.”
“Well, if it’s at all comforting, I don’t think you’ve ever been in control. I just think sometimes it’s easier to pretend that you are.”
“That’s not particularly comforting.”
“Sorry. But it’s the truth.”
“Can he come by the clinic again tomorrow?”
“Sure. He was fine today.”
“Are you going to come over for cleanup day?”
Spending the day watching Bennett do manual labor sounded like a recipe in sweet sexual torture. She wasn’t sure she was up for it. But she didn’t feel like she could leave him alone either. Not that he would be alone.
“Sure. Oh. Is that Saturday?”
“Yes.”
“I have a dinner date. So, I’m going to have to leave early to shower all the...you know.”
“Right. With the dachshund guy.”
“Michael,” she said.
“Right. Not like I really have to remember his name.”
Kaylee frowned into the darkness of the truck. “I’m sorry, what?”
“It’s not like I have to remember the guy’s name, Kay. Let’s be honest. Your boyfriends don’t last very long.”
“What the hell, Bennett?” she asked, rage breaking out over her skin like hives. She could feel it. Just beneath the surface of her skin. Itchy. Hot.
“How long has your longest relationship lasted, Kaylee?”
“I don’t know. But that’s completely...asinine. I know the names of all of your girlfriends.”
That just made her sound sad.
“Sorry. I didn’t know that would be an offensive observation. I’m just saying, it’s not like you’re going to go on more than a couple of dates with him.”
“I dated Kyle for three months.”
Surely he wasn’t her longest relationship. “Ryan.” She snapped her finger in triumph. “I dated Ryan for six months.”
“When? Five years ago?”
Probably.
“Just stop,” she said. “Stop while you’re only a couple steps behind and you have a hope in hell of catching up at some point.”
“Sorry,” he said.
She stewed. The only sound the tires on the rough road. She looked out the window, the darkness concealing any view she might have been able to use to distract herself with. She looked up, the dark, ragged silhouettes of the trees and inky blur bordering the clear night sky.
She took a deep breath. “I can’t believe that you think it’s not worth remembering the name of my date.” Apparently, she couldn’t let it go. Even if he did drop the subject.
“I’m just saying that unless he puts a ring on your finger or something, it’s very likely I’m not going to need to know his name.”
“I was right in the middle of all of your Olivia drama.”
“I was with her for a year. Plus, she was somebody that you knew before I started dating her.”
“No. That’s not it. I care more about what happens in your life than you care about what happens in mine.”
“The hell I don’t care.”
“Sure. You just let me never tell you about my home life.”
“Come on, Kaylee. Because I didn’t drag the story out of you by force? You never talked about it, I had no reason to assume that what you’d told me wasn’t the whole truth of it.”
She was being petulant. She was being driven into petulance by the fact that he didn’t care she was going on a date. That was the real issue. She knew the name of every woman he had ever gone out with because those women had each hooked a manicured nail into one of her insecurities. Olivia was so petite, and Kaylee, with her Amazonian stature, couldn’t compete. Then there had been Brandy. Who had looked exactly like her name suggested. Big breasts. Small waist. The kind of butt you had to do squats to get, because nobody got it on accident.
Yes. There had been many, and they had all been different than her in some way. He had never gone out with a lean, athletic-looking redhead who was pushing six feet.
She had made a choice. A choice to keep her friendship with Bennett as it was, but it didn’t stop her from resenting every woman who was brave enough to take what she didn’t feel like she could.
She remembered all the women because it bothered her. And he couldn’t remember the men, because they didn’t matter to him.
That hurt. No matter how much she wished it didn’t, no matter that it didn’t make sense because she’d decided their friendship should never change.
The certain knowledge that no part of him harbored secret fantasies about her...
It sucked, basically.
About a second before she crawled out of her skin, and then maybe crawled out of the moving vehicle, they arrived at the clinic. As soon he put the truck in Park she basically scrambled out of the passenger seat.
She heard the driver-side door slam a second after she slammed her own door. She ignored it.
“Kaylee,” he said. “I’m sorry.”
She stopped, closing her eyes. “Don’t, Bennett. I’m just tired.”
And there she was, pushing it all off like it was nothing. It wasn’t fair to get angry at him about her parents. To get angry about this. When push came to shove, when rubber met the very pothole-laden road, she always did this. She didn’t want to talk about it. She didn’t want to make a big deal out of it. Because she didn’t think she deserved...
She didn’t even know what.
“You’re not just tired. Something’s bothering you.”
“And you just became a father. Your life is...hell, Bennett, I don’t even know what your life is right now. My stuff doesn’t matter. It really doesn’t.”
“Kaylee, if you don’t tell me, then I can’t know. This is why I don’t know all your stuff. And then it isn’t fair that you’re angry at me.”
“Bennett...”
“I hope your date goes well.”
Dammit. Now she felt like she had been stuck through the chest with an ice pick. That didn’t help. It didn’t help at all.
“Thanks,” she said.
“If you want to talk about your parents...”
“If I did I would have by now. I just wanted to give you a context for the way that I was talking to Dallas. That’s all. We’re fine. The way that we are. We don’t need to change anything.”
She turned and stomped to her car, ignoring the fact that he was still standing there watching her. They were fine the way they were. Except that they weren’t. Except that as she had realized earlier, nothing was going to change. Touching him was always go
ing to light her on fire. Unless... She didn’t even know what.
All the deciding in the world that she wanted to be his friend wouldn’t take it away. Not forever. And when she was consumed with him it was...so awful. So hard.
She swallowed, miserable, her throat aching.
The date with Michael had to go well. He had to last long enough that Bennett would have to learn his name.
She had to do something to get a hold of herself.
She really did.
CHAPTER EIGHT
WHEN CLEANUP DAY rolled around, all hands were on deck. Though, some looked a little bit more enthusiastic than others.
Dallas, specifically, did not look overly enthusiastic. He was wearing a T-shirt, jeans and a pair of borrowed boots that actually fit him, even though he was a few inches shorter than Bennett. He would probably be just as tall in the end, if not taller.
He was like a puppy that hadn’t grown into his feet.
And didn’t own work boots, apparently. Bennett would have to fix that. He probably needed to get the kid all new clothes.
Over the past few days they had managed to sort out the school situation. Dallas really wasn’t behind, and if he was willing to do some testing, he could start at the beginning of the year along with the other kids.
Dallas was quick to agree to that, since summer school hadn’t been something he was especially dying to put on his to-do list.
Although, as Dallas pointed out after they left Gold Valley High School, he didn’t exactly have a social life to cripple. And until he started school, he wouldn’t.
Dallas having a social life would be a whole other thing. Other worries.
Teenagers wanting to be in his house. In potentially large groups.
He wasn’t going to think about that now. How had his dad done this? How had he handled four kids by himself?
One was making Bennett insane and Dallas hadn’t even done anything wrong.
He was feeling more grateful than he could have imagined for a day of hard labor. He needed something to punish his body badly enough that he wouldn’t be able to think of anything but his own physical pain.