by Natasha West
Jess felt like she’d spent all morning just trying to reset to zero with people she cared about it. But it had been worth it.
She felt a happiness that came with a near miss, like a person who’d had a call from the governor minutes before the switch was to be thrown on her electric chair. Everything might just be alright. She still had Claire. And she had Chloe back.
Chloe sat down next to Jess in the hall, as usual. Then they went to get lunch together, as usual. Chloe’s nearness was a comfort to poor Jess, who still had a head like a bowling bowl full of cotton wool. Not that she was complaining. She was too smart to complain today. She was too grateful.
And Chloe was grateful too. She’d been angry with Jess all year, but now she knew it had simply been easier than accepting that she missed her. Now they were friends again, it was alright to admit that.
Later in the day, as they sat in a debate, Jess covertly checked her emails when she saw that she had something from the Head. It was a message with the heading ‘Robert Naylor.’ Greg was also CC’d in.
Jess opened the email, scanning it quickly. It was the email she’d been waiting for. It had taken more than a year, but Naylor had finally given in. He’d agreed to take early retirement, rather than be sacked. It was a saving face result but Jess didn’t care. She’d done it. She’d won. She’d made a difference for Greg.
She sent Greg a short email, congratulating him on the result and he replied immediately. It was a glowing letter of deep and heartfelt thanks.
Jess was flying. She didn’t care about the hangover anymore. She wanted to celebrate.
She considered calling Claire to share the victory. But things were still weird. She didn’t want to spoil this moment for herself by getting a lukewarm response from her wife.
But there was someone else she could share this moment with.
She leaned over to Chloe and whispered in her ear, explaining briefly what had just happened. Chloe listened, her smile growing. And when Jess was done, Chloe put her hand up for a high five. Jess slapped it hard without hesitation and the entire room turned around at the sharp smack sound.
Jess and Chloe waited till all the heads had turned back and grinned at each other, suppressing their gleeful sniggers.
After the day’s sessions were over, Jess and Chloe decided they needed to get out of the fleapit hotel at the first opportunity to celebrate. They were like kids waiting for the school bell to ring, releasing them from all the mundane horror of lessons.
As they walked briskly down the street, they passed the pub from the night before.
‘Howsabout this place?’ Chloe asked cheekily. ‘They’ve probably had a chance to throw some bleach down the loos by now.’
Jess rolled her eyes and grabbed Chloe’s arm, dragging her past the pub.
Finally, after a brief walk around Birmingham city centre, they ended up choosing a Mexican restaurant called ‘Francisco’s’. It was a little more upscale than the place they’d visited in Brighton and a lot more expensive. But it felt like a nice way to celebrate their reconnection. They both knew it without having to discuss it. Jess had simply pointed at the place and Chloe had immediately nodded in agreement.
Ten minutes later, they were scooping thick guacamole into their mouths via tortilla chips.
They ate in silence for several seconds before verdicts were delivered.
‘It’s not as good as the Burrito Hut, but not bad’ Jess said after washing down her food with some cola.
‘You can’t possibly remember the taste of some guacamole you ate three years ago’ Chloe declared, exasperated.
‘Oh, can’t I?’ Jess asked smugly.
Chloe shook her head.
Sometime later, Chloe and Jess rolled out of Francisco’s, fit to burst.
‘Where now?’
‘Bar?’ Chloe asked.
‘I cannot touch even a millimetre of alcohol ever, ever again.’
Chloe gave Jess’s declaration the cynical look it deserved.
‘I’ll remember that you said that.’
‘I’m serious’ Jess moaned. ‘I feel like a pig shat in my head.’
Chloe grimaced.
‘You’re a poet, Jess. A true wordsmith.’
Jess smiled with only one side of her mouth. She had a thought.
‘Hey, do you think any of the parks are still open? I’d kind of like to sit out in the open…’ Jess started.
‘That sounds nice’ Chloe began to say.
‘…So I can puke at a moment’s notice if necessary’ finished Jess.
‘Less nice. But let’s do it anyway.’
Jess took out her phone and began to look for the nearest park.
‘OK, knit your fingers together and hold them just there’ Jess said.
‘I’m not sure about this. Isn’t it breaking and entering?’
‘It’s not the bloody Louvre, it’s some grass and a pond. They just close it at night so people can’t sit in there taking heroin. And I’m fresh out. So what’s the big deal?’
Chloe sighed and put her hands together as Jess had shown her. She stood next to the park fence and braced herself. But Jess was an athlete, light and quick. Chloe barely felt the impact as she stepped onto her hand and leapt over the fence. She landed gracefully on the other side with a satisfied grunt.
Chloe looked at her over the fence.
‘And now how do I get in?’ she asked.
Jess look baffled.
‘You know, I really hadn’t thought that far ahead.’
Chloe gave her a look of exasperation and then scanned the perimeter of the park.
‘Wait there’ she said and ran off.
Jess waited for twenty seconds before she felt a hand on her shoulder. She screamed and turned, ready to fight off her attacker.
It was Chloe.
‘Fuck sakes! I nearly had a heart attack. How did you get in?’
Chloe grinned.
‘Gap in the fence. Which is good, because I’m not much of an acrobat. I’d probably break my ankle if I’d tried what you did.’
‘It’s just physics. Angle of ascent. Calculate it properly and you can get all kinds of surprising places.’
Chloe raised an eyebrow and said ‘I’ll bet you had an interesting childhood.’
‘So many stories, Price. Anyway, let’s get a look at that duck pond.’
They walked over to the pond, where two ducks were swimming quietly. They sat on a bench to watch them float peacefully.
But suddenly, one of the ducks got a little amorous. Chloe and Jess found themselves watching the ducks having raucous, flappy sex.
‘Well, this just got awkward’ Chloe said.
‘I know’ agreed Jess. ‘I feel like I should cough or something.’
Chloe laughed.
‘OY!’ a voice cried loudly. Jess and Chloe turned sharply to the sound. A chubby middle aged park attendant was running at them. Well, maybe running was too grand a word for it, but he was coming towards them at a reasonable pace.
Chloe turned to Jess and shouted ‘Leg it!’
They both stood and began to run the other way, while the old, puffing man tried to follow, jogging lightly. He was no speed match for two young-ish women, but he had determination.
Jess followed Chloe. She seemed to have a route planned. She pushed herself into a bush and Jess followed in time to see her slip through a gap in the fence. But Chloe was small, smaller than Jess. Looking at the gap, Jess knew she couldn’t get through.
Chloe’s face popped up over the fence.
‘You coming?’ she urged in a stage whisper.
‘I won’t fit!’ Jess explained desperately.
Chloe sighed and slipped back through the gap and back into the park, lacing her hands together and assuming the position. Jess didn’t hesitate, catapulting herself over the fence as the park attendant suddenly burst into the bush and cried in a thick Brummie accent ‘Where do you think you’re going?!’
Chloe turned and thru
st herself back through the fence, the man almost upon her. Before she knew it, they were on the other side together while the frustrated man yelled at them to come back and face the music. Luckily, he could neither vault the fence nor fit through the gap.
The looked at each other, giggling breathlessly. Then they heard the gate further down the fence creaking open. The attendant, who clearly took his job a little too seriously, did not intend to let them go just yet.
Chloe and Jess ran off down the road, as fast as their legs would take them.
They got back to the hotel as the sun began to set. Chloe’s legs were still jelly from the incident at the park.
‘How many times’ she was asking Jess.
‘Mmm, maybe three?’
‘That’s happened to you three times before?’
‘Not exactly that, but similar things. Security guards, angry workmen, stuff like that’ Jess explained. ‘When I was young, I just liked being places I wasn’t supposed to be, I can’t explain it. But that’s the first time since I’ve been an adult. I have to set an example for the kids. They can’t have Spiderman teaching them, they wouldn’t respect me. Actually, I take that back. They’d probably give me a lot more respect if I was Spiderman.’
They arrived at the hotel and looked up at it’s depressing façade.
Out of nowhere, Jess started laughing.
‘What?’ Chloe asked.
‘I can’t believe you shouted ‘Leg it.’
‘Yeah. That was weird. I don’t think I’ve ever used that expression in my life.’
‘You should try more breaking and entering. You could perfect your delivery.’
Chloe was still staring at the hotel, at something high up the building.
‘Speaking of which… Are you done for the night or have you got one more crime left in you?’
Jess’s surprised grin was a wonderful sight for Chloe to behold.
Several tense minutes later, they were at the top of the hotel’s stairwell, having crept past the reception and the night porter to get up to the rooftop.
‘It says ‘FIRE EXIT’ Jess was saying. ‘If we open that door, an alarm is gonna go off. We’ll be busted.’
‘Half the time, those doors aren’t even hooked up to anything. I say we give it a go.’
‘Good god, one taste of the criminal life and you’re a thrill seeking risk taker. What have kind of monster have I created?’
Chloe and Jess regarded the door to the roof, unsure. Chloe threw her hands up.
‘If we do this, we’ve got to be in it together. If I go down, you go down with me. That’s the deal.’
‘You realise it would have been so easy to make a smutty joke there, don’t you?’
Chloe nodded faux seriously.
‘I do. And I appreciate the restraint you showed.’
And with that, she twisted the door handle and threw the door open, walking through.
Jess, still in the stairwell, threw her hands over her ears and waited. But there was no blaring alarm.
She walked out onto the hotel’s forgotten rooftop to see an unexpectedly gorgeous view, the entire city spread out before them. The light of the setting sun bathed it in a golden glow.
For once, Jess couldn’t think of a thing to say.
‘I think this was worth the risk’ Chloe said.
Jess nodded and they walked over to the edge of the roof. Jess peeked over quickly.
‘We’re pretty high.’
‘That’s OK. I’ve got Spiderman with me.’
They’d been on the roof of the Imperial for about forty minutes, sitting carefully on the ledge, and so far, they’d yet to get past trading jokes with each other. The year of silence, of resentment, it was over. Neither one of them wanted to say something real and risk ruining it.
Eventually, and predictably, Jess got tired of skimming the surface.
‘So, let me get a look at that rock of yours’ she said and grabbed Chloe’s hand. ‘Nice’ she said, inspecting the engagement ring.
‘Thanks.’
‘So when and where did she ask?’
‘Actually, I popped the question.’
‘Really?’ Jess said, taken aback.
‘Why is that so shocking?’ Chloe asked with a defiant look.
Jess wasn’t sure why she’d been so surprised. She thought about it, trying to figure out what was wrong with the picture.
‘I don’t know. I guess I always thought you were the type to get swept up, not really the type to do the sweeping. I hope that doesn’t offend you’ she added quickly.
‘It doesn’t’ Chloe said evenly.
‘What made you decide to do it?’ Jess asked carefully.
Chloe considered the question.
‘I love her. What more can I say?’
Jess went quiet for a full minute. Chloe, who’d been expecting Jess to say something, anything, found the silence disquieting.
‘What are you thinking?’ Chloe asked softly, surprising Jess out of her thoughts.
‘Oh, I don’t know. Nothing really.’
Chloe didn’t like that answer at all. Jess always had an opinion. It was something Chloe simultaneously liked and found very annoying about her.
‘I don’t buy it. Come on. Whatever it is, say it.’
A pause.
‘Eh, I don’t really know if I should’ Jess said reticently.
‘Why not?’
‘It’s dangerous territory.’
Chloe understood.
‘Ahh. Right. Yeah.’
Another silence.
‘Fuck it’ Chloe said. ‘Say it anyway.’
Jess’s eyebrows went up. That was the great thing about not being a swearer, Chloe knew. When you do swear, it gets a reaction.
‘Hey, potty mouth’ Jess said with a nervous grin. ‘If you’re gonna start breaking out the foul language, I’m taking my ball and going home right now.’
Chloe knew that Jess was trying to joke her way out of the delicate situation they’d found themselves in. But she had an idea that if she just waited, Jess would say what was on her mind.
It was a good call. Jess had decided to try and wriggle out of the question, but she was reconsidering the logic of that. If being friends again meant they couldn’t talk about anything real in their lives, she realised, then what was the point?
‘OK, it’s just that… I don’t know. I kind of thought that Freya was more of a… short term prospect. I didn’t think she was your one true love or anything.’
Chloe felt a twinge of annoyance. And then she realised why it had niggled her. Because Jess knew her better than she thought.
‘Yeah, I suppose maybe that was true in the beginning. But, I don’t know, she’s great in a lot of ways. And I’m turning thirty soon. It just seemed time to stop messing about. Time to just choose something and commit to it.’
Chloe’s own words reverberated in her ears.
‘Does that sound bad?’ she asked sadly.
Jess was about to tell her that it didn’t sound great. But then she thought better of it. She realised that maybe she wasn’t in a position to start making judgements on anyone else’s relationship, as things stood at the moment. The phrase ‘Black and white’ suddenly popped into her head.
She shrugged.
‘Nah. It’s as good a reason as any when you get down to it.’
Chloe gave her a grateful smile.
They looked out over the city, darker now. The lights from the buildings and traffic sparkled like man-made stars.
‘Wait, did I just hear you say ‘one true love’?’ Chloe asked abruptly.
Jess gave a small laugh.
‘It’s just an expression.’
‘But is that what you think? That you only get one?’
‘I don’t know…’
‘I’m not going to laugh if you say yes.’
Jess chewed her lip for a second.
‘I used to think maybe that was true. But I think that’s just a youthful fantasy.�
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‘But you married your ‘one’? Didn’t you?’