by A. R. Crebs
“Have you always been able to speak in tongues?” There was humor in his voice, but there was also a hint of unease.
Aria looked up at him in confusion. “Speak in tongues?”
Troy gave a sideways smirk. “Yeah. Just now…when you healed me, you weren’t speaking English.”
Aria’s forehead wrinkled. “I thought I was.”
Troy let out a slow breath. “What’d he do to you, Aria?”
She shook her head, placing her ear against his chest again. The pacemaker clicked in her ear between random heartbeats. The sound worried her.
“He didn’t do anything,” she muttered.
“He did something. I wasn’t alive, remember? You have to tell me what he did.” Troy’s anger was rising suddenly, and Aria wasn’t sure why.
She moved away. “He….” She was reluctant to tell Troy what happened. She honestly believed deep in her heart that Dovian wasn’t a monster. Truthfully, she was frightened out of her mind while Dovian was on his psychotic rampage. She had never seen him like that, and assumed he'd never behave that way. In fact, she believed he wanted to kill her. All hope had been lost. But now she was alive. She was standing and so was Troy. Dovian had to have been responsible for that as well.
“Damn it, Aria. Did he hurt you? There was blood on you. What happened?” he asked lowly.
Aria looked down at her bare stomach. She shyly ran her hand over her skin. As she replayed the events in her head, tears filled her eyes.
“Troy…” she tried to laugh about it. “He shot me.”
Her words unglued the man. Spinning away, he gripped his hair. “He shot you….” He could barely manage to say the words.
“Yeah. With the same gun he shot you with. He turned around, jammed it under my ribcage, and pulled the trigger.” Her jaw was clenched tight, awaiting Troy’s wrath.
The man slammed his fist down on the stone table in the corner. The booming noise caused the woman to jump. He placed his hands on either side of the surface and didn’t meet Aria’s eyes.
“He actually did it. He really did try to kill you. Despite my pleas…despite everything we’ve been through. He tried to kill you,” Troy snarled in a harsh whisper.
“I don’t think he wanted us dead, Troy. We’re still alive!” Aria spoke up.
“That’s not good enough! That doesn’t make sense, Aria. He didn’t want us alive! If he did, he would’ve come back with us. He would have let Ivory come with us! The man’s a monster, plain and simple!” he yelled.
“How do you explain us then? Why are we standing here?” she asked.
Troy shook his head. “I have no clue, Aria, but it wasn’t his doing. I know it.”
“What other explanation is there?” She stepped forward. “Why are you so set on him being a monster? I thought we were past this. I thought you were over that stupid night in Saray!”
“It’s not about that!” Troy shouted.
“The hell it isn’t!” she quarreled.
Troy gave an exasperated sigh. “What I wouldn’t give for you to lose your voice for once. It’d give me time to sort my thoughts and form some damn words!”
“Those are your thoughts, Troy! You resent Dovian. God! I have one night, one night where I let loose, and you get pissed! What about all the nights I had to babysit you, come to the rescue, or give you advice on all the different women you brought home?” Aria shouted.
“That’s not what I’m upset about.” Troy rolled his eyes.
“Then what in the hell are you upset about, Troy?” Her voice was like ice. “Lately it seems all you want to do it fight with me.”
Giving a frustrated scream, the man tugged on his hair. “It’s because I’m inadequate!” he roared.
Aria was stunned. “You…feel inadequate. So…because you feel inadequate, you fight with me?” She sounded thoroughly confused if not slightly sarcastic, and that only made Troy more perturbed.
He sank back against the table, his palm running over his face. “No, no. I don’t want to fight with you,” he said in a calmer tone. “Aria, can’t you see? I do enough fighting. I go out nearly every day fighting wars that don’t make sense, risking my life for others I don’t even know. People say I have no heart, have no soul. They define me by what they think I am. They ask me why I do this. They think I am lost. But you know what? I’m not lost.”
Aria’s posture loosened as she listened intently.
“Fighting in these wars, in these endless battles, they are what keep me living. I get up every day and fight. Not for glory, not for honor, but to be by your side. I do this to protect you, to watch your back, to make sure nothing happens to you. Because once you’re gone, I have nothing. I am nothing.” Troy palmed his chest. “I’ll lose my heart; I’ll lose my soul. I’m not lost because I fight. I’m found because I am doing it with you, for you. If anything were ever to happen to you, I would be lost, Aria. It’s not what I do that defines me; it’s who I do it with that defines me. And I can’t think of any better definition for myself than you. So no, I’m not here to fight with you. I’m here because I love you.”
Once again, Aria was speechless. Troy lowered his stare to his boots.
He continued, “And I feel inadequate because I have consistently allowed you to get hurt. I have allowed you to remain unhappy. And I’m tired of running away with you. I’m following in the shadow of your fears from the past. I don’t want to do that anymore. I want to be here with you, in the present. I want to keep you secure for the future. So, I’m not angry because you’re happy. I’m not angry because Dovian had made you laugh at one time. I’m mad because I wasn’t the man who did it. I’m mad at myself for not being able to bring those smiles to your face, for not being able to comfort you in the death of our friend…Gavin. I’m mad because I allowed harm to come to you, from Dovian no less. And I’m mad that I wasn’t a better friend to him, to maybe prevent him from doing what he’s doing now. You know, my mind spins in circles, too. And yeah, I shut it off. I ignore my problems. Because if I dwelled on everything like you did, we’d probably not be standing here today.” He rubbed his eyes, feeling awkward under her scrutiny. “So, um…yeah. That’s what I was thinking.”
In two large strides, Aria was against him, her arms snaking around his torso in a tight embrace. Squeezing her eyes shut, she fought back her tears. Troy didn’t hate her. He never had. He loved her, and he showed his love every day since the first day they met by always fighting by her side. No matter what other options arose for him, he always stayed with her. After everything they had been through, after all the years, Troy’s love never faltered but only grew stronger. And now everything in their world threatened to tear it apart. She had nearly lost him, just like she had lost Gavin. Every day they were in danger, and every day of the future their lives were going to be at risk. It scared the hell out of her.
“But…what if?” her voice wavered as she sniffled.
“What if what?” Troy asked. He gently held her away from him, trying to look at her face. “What is it you’re so afraid of?”
Aria’s green eyes fled to his. “What if things go wrong?”
Troy smirked. “You’re always pessimistic. For once, why can’t you just ask yourself, what if things go right?”
Running a hand along the side of her face, he brushed her hair behind her ear. Moonlight shimmered against the tears in her eyes, creating silver orbs. Leaning down, Troy met her lips. Aria sank against him, pulling him tightly toward her. He returned the gesture and wrapped his muscular arms around her small frame. For once, he felt whole. Aria was the missing puzzle piece. She made sense; she felt right. She was his everything, his home.
Aria parted, giving a quiet gasp for air as she fought with herself to maintain self-control. “Don’t ever leave my side,” she said in a shuddering whisper.
Troy held her, planting a firm kiss on her forehead. “Never,” he spoke softly against her.
Aria directed him back to her lips. They had nearly di
ed, and now they were stranded on Ives. They had no way off the island, and it was only a matter of time before they were found. It frightened her. It could be the last night of their lives together.
After another kiss, she finally reciprocated. “I love you. I love you so much, Troy.”
He gave a quiet sigh. “I’ve waited years for you to say that,” he replied with a chuckle.
Troy deepened the kiss, and soon the two could barely keep their balance as Aria pulled him with her.
“Bed,” she moaned, her teeth grazing his lower lip.
He hummed a laugh against her flesh, kissing and exploring her neck. “Is that an order?”
“Yes!” she hissed.
He gave another rumbling laugh. “Waited years for you to say that, too.”
Aria’s passionate gasps only urged Troy to continue as he gently bit her earlobe. The woman pulled him, and he fell onto the bed. She climbed atop, straddling him. A broad grin crossed her face as she tugged off what remained of her shirt. The feel of his body beneath her was tantalizing. Troy looked thoroughly amused, his face holding a dumb smirk. He tried grabbing her chest, and she smacked his hands away, giggling. He persisted until Aria gave up and allowed him to continue his exploration. Sitting up, pulling her hips against him, he trailed kisses along her collarbone and shoulder. It wasn’t long before Aria’s control over him was slack, and he took the opportunity to flip her over onto the bed, a loud squeal erupting from her. She twisted her mouth in feign dissatisfaction.
“You’ve had plenty of years to dominate over me, Miss Ivanov.” Troy pulled off his shirt. His dog tags clinked against his bare chest. “You have your areas of expertise…let me show you mine.”
Aria gave a gasping laugh as the man effortlessly pulled off her pants with one tug. Troy beamed with joy, grinding his hips against her in a way that made her cover her eyes in embarrassment. The sound of her laughter was like music to his ears. Seeing her beneath him in nothing more than her underwear with a pink tinge to her face, Troy finally felt like he had won the war.
‘Oh, yeah. I’ve waited years for this,’ he thought.
Covering the woman with his body, he planted a soft kiss on her lips. He finally had her, and he was never letting go.
"Tired Of Waiting"
Chapter 16
As Ivory walked down the dilapidated halls, she trailed a thin hand along the walls. Etched markings covered the surfaces, her fingertips reading the language, translating tales into her mind of the world beyond hers that once belonged to the Sorcēarians. A shattered marble statue blocked her path, and she stepped over it with ease. She didn’t know who exactly it commemorated but could guess its resemblance belonged to someone in Dovian’s lineage. Exhaling an exhaustive breath, she neared one of the rooms that possibly housed the man she was looking for. Padding quietly around the corner, she halted at a doorframe. Though the room was not his, something drew her there, and to find Dovian seated on the floor was no surprise.
The room was feminine in nature. Purple and green banners and curtains decorated the room, all marred with soot and dust, some of the colors now undistinguishable. A long silver and gold bed with twisted metal posts framed the large window along one wall. A few stuffed animals crowded the pillows of the bed; some were now stained and worn beyond recognition. There were dry petals scattered across the floor, leading to an armoire that had dead flowers atop it. Ivory’s eyes fell to the man seated on an ornate rug.
“I figured you’d want to be far from me,” he murmured.
Ivory took that as permission to enter the room. She kept a safe distance from the man, watching his back.
“It’s terribly lonely in this city. It’s hard to receive comfort when there is none,” she spoke quietly.
Dovian didn’t budge. Keeping a seated position, he placed his hands on his knees.
“What are you doing?” she asked.
Dovian slowly opened his eyes, looking at the rumbling clouds in the far-off distance. Lightning darted from one cloud to another, the beams spreading like fire across the bubbling forms.
“Meditating,” he replied.
Ivory approached the bed. It looked clean enough, so she took a seat. Dovian continued to stare out the window, his expression tense.
“Isn’t meditating supposed to relax you?” she asked.
Dovian’s frown deepened. “It usually helps, but I’m not necessarily trying to relax as much as I am trying to think.”
“Am I interrupting?” She tugged on her fingers.
Dovian finally met her gaze. “No. You’re fine.”
They didn’t say anything for a while, and Dovian fidgeted a few times, taking in the sights of the bedroom.
“Lita’s,” he stated, barely audible.
Ivory looked around.
Dovian continued, “I used to meditate out in the grass. She interrupted me when she was having troubles, which wasn’t too often. Sometimes she would simply join my side.”
“You two were very close,” Ivory said.
Dovian closed his eyes, his face wrinkling. “Losing I’Lanthe was one thing, but losing Lita was a whole other pain. There was a bond we shared, and to have it severed in the way it had…it left me broken. I lost two parts of my soul that day.”
“You didn’t kill her.”
He looked out the window, resuming his attention on the storm clouds in the distance. “No,” he finally admitted. “I did not kill her or I’Lanthe.”
Ivory straightened her posture. “You make it out to be like you’re a murderer who destroyed everyone and everything.”
“It’s to protect others. I do not need attachment from others. I cannot have humanity depending on me. And yes, I am to blame in certain aspects, but I cannot lie anymore. I will not say I killed I’Lanthe or Lita, but I can say that I wasn’t much help in the matter.” He tugged on a loose strand on the rug.
“Was that something you could control?” Ivory diverted her attention out the window as well.
“Do you want the illogical or logical answer?” he questioned, halfway amused.
Ivory gave a small smile. “You blame yourself, yet you had no control over the way events played out.”
Dovian lowered his head, giving a tired scoff.
“I would love to have met you in the past, Dovian. Were you always so hard or had you been entirely different?” Ivory leaned forward, resting her chin in her hands.
The man remained lost in thought, memories flooding through him that he had often forgotten about. He had pushed them into the back of his mind so not to feel the pain.
“I was always a bit of a downer, as Lita would say, but I was a different man.” He tiredly rubbed his eyes. “I had some semblance of genuine happiness.”
She smiled sadly. “I wish I could have known you then.”
“I wish I could say that someday I will return to that naive persona. Honestly, after everything, there’s no chance of that. Life will never be what it once was.” He leaned back on his hands. “I wish I could give that to you, Ivory. You belong in that time, not here and now.”
“I may speak of wanting to know you in the past, but there’s nowhere else I’d rather be than here with you right now.” She ran her hand through her curls. The humidity had made her hair unruly.
Dovian gave her an inquisitive look. “Ivory, in all right, you should loathe me and desperately want to be anywhere but here with me right now. I should have let you leave with Aria and Troy. If I had…perhaps, I wouldn’t have had to do what I had done.”
Ivory looked out at the storm and then back to Dovian. “I’m glad I wasn’t there. Sapphire would have made you do it either way, and I would not have wanted to see that.”
“I tried,” Dovian whispered. “I tried everything in my power to keep them from meeting their demise. Damn it, Ivory. There were so many possibilities. Every minute of every day there is an opportunity to change the entire outcome of this nightmare, and my decisions seem to make no difference.”
“What would you have done differently? And would it have worked?” she asked.
Dovian reached out as if grasping the clouds in his sight.
“At that moment, everything had become exponentially limited. The way things played out, I was left with very few options. So…I took the best route, only to have things hindered significantly by Aria’s response.” He ran his fingertips along his forehead.
“She fought you, didn’t she?” Ivory asked, giving a fleeting grin. The thought threatened to bring tears to her eyes. Aria was so strong and determined despite her painful past.
Dovian nodded. “I could have fatally wounded them and still allowed them some chance of survival. My goal was to make it look real, give the impression that I had killed them, and then turn Sapphire’s attention away from them. I found a gun…something that I could use that would play off the coldness of my act. They’d have more of a chance of survival from that than my powers. However, upon trying to injure Troy, Aria hit me. There was a little chance; few different outcomes could have arisen, and I attempted to compensate for the possibility. Troy was hit in a lethal way.” He gave an aggravated groan. “She’s so frustrating! It significantly reduced his rate of survival. In fact, if he had not received medical attention promptly, he would die. And seeing as there are no hospitals around….” Dovian grasped his hair. He remained silent.
Ivory frowned.
“I’m sure he’s not survived. There would be no way. All because of a split-second decision on Aria’s part,” he said, covering his forehead. “Something I did not see at that time.”
Ivory gave a smile. “It makes me happy to know that you tried, Dovian. You did what you could.”
Dovian disagreed. “It wasn’t enough! It’s never enough! Ivory! I….” He struggled to form words, and quickly pushed everything back to maintain control of his emotions. “I had to kill him. He was suffering. I had to end him. I sent a pulse of energy to his head and stopped his brain functions. Aria went ballistic, and I gave her what I could to break her. I jammed that pistol beneath her ribcage, and I hoped for the best as I pulled the trigger. Maybe, somehow, she could survive. Maybe, by some miracle, she could live and get the hell out of here. My only regret is that I couldn’t save Troy.” Dovian hid his face in his hands. “I’ve failed,” he harshly whispered.