“I’m going to go get him,” Brett went on.
“Get him?”
“I’ll bring him down here so he can see that Todd’s going to be fine.”
“Here?” The last thing she wanted to do was face Tyler right now. “Tonight?”
“He’ll never sleep otherwise. LuAnn says he’s beside himself.”
Of course he was. He’d known more death, destruction and disruption than any child should be allowed.
Brett leaned down and kissed Todd’s cheek. “I’ll be right back, buddy.”
Haley turned her gaze away, but Brett drew her up. The expression in his eyes showed grave concern, but not for Todd. For her. Because Brett knew she fell down on the job, mixing priorities. Well, she’d set that all straight once the courts reopened for session Monday. She wasn’t sure how or when, but one way or another she’d fix this before something worse happened to the boys.
“I’ll be right back.”
She didn’t trust herself to speak. She might say too much, or totally break down. Neither one was an option. He pressed a kiss to her forehead, a sympathetic touch of his lips to her brow. For quick seconds, she was tempted to accept his strength, but she couldn’t. Once she revoked her guardianship of those two precious boys, Brett would want nothing more to do with her, and that was to be expected. At this moment, she didn’t want all that much to do with herself.
* * *
“Haley?” Katie peeked into the room a quarter-hour later. “You’re alone?”
Haley nodded. “Brett went to get Tyler. He wants to bring him here and show him that Todd’s all right.”
“Good idea.”
Haley stared at her. “How can it be good for him to see his little brother bruised and broken in a hospital?”
Katie sank into the chair Brett vacated. “Because it’s better to see the truth than imagine the worst. Tyler’s had a lot going on these past two years.”
And Haley had just added to his plate. Sorrow pinched within.
“And my guess is he’s got some trust issues,” Katie added.
Haley knew the truth of that. “He does.”
“So bringing him here to see Todd is the best thing to do. It allays his anxiety and allows him to be the big brother.”
The fact that Katie’s reasoning made sense made Haley angrier at herself. “How do you and Brett know these things?”
“Well, I—”
Nervous energy pushed Haley up and out of the chair. “You don’t have kids. Brett was an absentee father, but you guys all seem to have a handle on this stuff. I’m so totally in over my head, Katie. How can I be trusted to care for these two precious boys if I can’t keep them safe?”
“Oh, honey.” Katie angled her a matter-of-fact look. “That’s the million-dollar question every parent asks themself. And even though I don’t have kids, experience has shown me that there are no easy answers in parenting.” Katie held her gaze, then inched up her pant leg until a gleaming prosthetic showed. “Accidents happen for a lot of reasons, but look at this.” She swept her false leg a good, hard look. “Losing this leg in a car accident was the best thing that happened to me.”
Haley frowned, then shook her head. “That makes no sense.”
Katie shrugged and dropped the pant leg down. “I made stupid mistakes, but they taught me so much. To love God, to live fresh, to grab all the wonders of life I could because only God knows the day and the hour when we’ll be called home.”
“You learned all that when?”
Katie laughed softly. “Let’s just say the accident started the process. It took a while. But you can’t beat yourself up over this. It’s unhealthy.” She rested her gaze on Todd. “Life comes with risk.”
“I don’t do risk.” Haley had thought otherwise, but she realized tonight that outside of business, she was the most immovable person she knew. At age twenty-eight, how sad was that?
Katie stood and pressed a hand to Haley’s shoulder. “Loving comes with risk attached. We risk losing our hearts and our loved ones.”
The truth of her words drove Haley’s fear deeper.
“But I can’t imagine life without loving,” Katie continued. “Without caring. Being a Scrooge who sits on the sidelines, guarding funds, letting life pass me by. Risk equates opportunity.”
Did it?
Right now Haley couldn’t and wouldn’t believe it.
“I’ll have his discharge papers ready for morning. Once he wakes up we’ll send him home. Keep him on the quiet side for a day or two. By the time the cast is put on on Tuesday, he should be ready for normal activity.”
Tuesday. If she approached the judge Monday, who would be with her little guy Tuesday? She’d wait, then, until Wednesday. Or Thursday.
A tiny glimmer of how it would feel to walk away from these boys needled her. Was she considering this for their own good? Or hers?
Brett slipped in through the curtains just then. He carried a scared and curious Tyler in one arm. The other held Panther, Todd’s well-loved black cat. Without a sound, he plunked the five-year-old into Haley’s lap and settled the pajama-clad stuffed animal beneath Todd’s good arm as Katie slipped away.
Tyler curled into her. Instinctively her arms went around him, holding him. Nurturing him. How could she stay a step removed while holding a living, breathing little boy whose life turned upside-down so many times already?
Exactly why you should. Aren’t you getting this? Are you forgetting the injured child in that bed?
Brett squatted alongside and put a big, broad hand on Tyler’s leg. “Todd’s sleeping right now. His head got bumped when he hit the ground.”
“After the car hit him.”
The frank words made Haley’s eyes water again.
“Exactly.” Brett’s voice stayed even. “Todd darted into the parking lot while Aunt Haley was dropping off a key to the cooperative.”
“He does that all the time.” Tyler squinted up at Brett. “Why doesn’t he listen to people?”
“Because he’s three.”
“Oh.” Brett’s straightforwardness seemed to make sense to Tyler. He worked his little jaw, then nodded. “I monkeyed around when I was three, too. My mom told me that. She said I climbed everything and that I was lucky to be alive.”
Brett’s soft smile swept Haley’s face. “Sounds like a boy to me.”
“So Todd’s gonna be all right?”
“Good as new,” Brett promised. “And you can be the first person to sign his cast.”
“Really?” Concern for his brother disappeared. “I get to be first?”
“Absolutely.”
“Sweet!”
Haley couldn’t help it. She smiled. And when Brett saw her lips curve, something in his face changed. The worry she’d seen etched there softened. Faded. She couldn’t ever remember a time when her smile affected someone like that. It felt... wonderful.
“All right, little man. I’ve got to get you back home.”
“Already?”
“Yes.” Brett stood and reached down for Tyler. “You need to sleep so you can help your brother tomorrow. He’s only going to be able to use his left arm, so he might need you to do things for him. And no wrestling for a while.”
“Okay. I’ll just wrestle with you, then.”
“You’ve got it, partner.” He lifted the boy, then dipped him low again. “Give Aunt Haley a kiss goodbye. You’ll see her in the morning.”
“Bye, Aunt Haley.” Tyler’s soft lips pressed a kiss to her face while he squeezed her neck with five-year-old vigor. “Love you.”
Her heart choked into her throat.
Emotions stirred anew.
Tyler had never said that before. Or even alluded to it. His earnest pledge scared and delighted her.
/> Brett grazed her cheek with the palm of his hand. He met her gaze with a look of such tenderness that she thought she might break apart inside. “I’ll see you tomorrow. I’m going to keep Tyler with me tonight.”
“Okay.”
His move made perfect sense. In times of crisis, parents would divide and conquer. She may not have experienced that firsthand, but it made great battle strategy, and she was beginning to realize that parenting was kind of like a series of ongoing missions.
No wonder Brett came to it naturally.
Could she get better at it? Did she dare try? She fell asleep in the chair, torn between the safety of self-sacrifice and the loss of two little boys’ love.
Chapter Nineteen
Haley stayed home with the boys on Sunday.
On Monday, Tyler went to school. She and Todd sat home and played more games of Memory than should be considered logistically possible.
Tuesday, she took Todd to the orthopedic surgeon for a cast and went home without so much as a stop for fast food.
By Wednesday, she was ready to climb the walls. So was Todd.
Luckily Fiona showed up with baby Reilly Wednesday afternoon. Todd had fallen asleep on the couch, his bruised head and broken arm making him look quite pathetic.
“Oh.” Fiona made a face of concern as she saw the little guy’s face, his arm. “Oh, Haley, however did you do it?”
Guilt speared. “I didn’t mean to, Fee.”
Fiona turned, perplexed, then she sputtered, exasperated. “That’s not what I meant. I mean, how did you deal with it? I think I’d faint dead away and just add to the problem. I’m a wuss when it comes to this baby.”
“That about sums it up.”
“Really?” Fiona’s face turned hopeful. “You really didn’t handle this like you do everything else?”
“Everything else?” Haley frowned, sat down and motioned Fiona to do likewise. “What do you mean?”
“I researched you before I came here,” Fee admitted. She set down the baby with an ease she hadn’t shown a week before. “And you’re amazing. An editor and columnist for the college paper, running an entrepreneurial society, working at the Street of Shops in Lewisburg. And excellent grades.”
“And not one of those things prepared me for this.” Haley let her gaze rest on the sleeping child. “I don’t have a clue what I’m doing and as you can see, I mucked things up already.”
Fiona lifted the baby from her seat, crossed the room and deposited her into Haley’s arms, ignoring Haley’s sputter of protest. “You need to get to know her. She needs to get to know you. Avoiding her won’t do you any good.”
“You’ve decided to keep her.” Joy nudged some of Haley’s guilt aside. “Oh, Fiona, I’m so glad.”
“But I’ll need help,” Fiona told her, flat out. “I’m young and I’ve made mistakes, but I don’t want to make more. Charlie and LuAnn said I can stay there for a while more, but I need to be able to support myself and this baby.”
Haley couldn’t argue that. “Kids are expensive.”
Fee acknowledged that with a pressed-lip nod. “You can say that again. And my mom raised me on public assistance. You know how good our father was at avoiding payments.”
Haley’s stepfather had made that point repeatedly, that he’d stepped in and paid for what Haley’s father created. She’d grown up guilty of her father’s malfeasance, the shadows of his misdeeds that helped shut Grandpa’s factory down. That pervasive attitude pushed her to fund her own college education. She hit age eighteen determined to go it alone, and she’d done so. But she’d realized these past weeks that being alone wasn’t nearly as much fun as she’d pretended.
“Anyway, I’ve called some of the local shops and put in applications. I can’t really start until February, but one way or another, I’m going to take charge of my life. Here. In Jamison. I just wanted to make sure you don’t mind if I stay.”
“Mind?” Haley frowned at her. “Why would I mind, Fee?”
“Because you didn’t expect to have your little sister show up out of the blue, perched on your doorstep, ready to give birth.”
True on all counts, but... “I’m glad you’re here.” She brought Reilly up for a tiny kiss against velvet-soft skin. “And I’m so glad to meet this baby.”
“Good.” Fee’s smile said more than the single word. “Right now I just want to feel like I belong somewhere. Like I’m part of something.”
“Like you’re wanted.”
Fee shrugged. “Yes.”
Haley understood perfectly. Reilly started fussing in her arms, and Fee crossed the room, picked her up from Haley, and resettled herself with the nursing cape. “Feeding time.”
“You’re getting more comfortable.” The tiny hint of envy in her tone dismayed Haley.
“Day by day,” Fee answered. Once she and the baby were comfortable, she pushed back her brown curls and lifted the opposite shoulder. “But I’m counting on your good example to lead the way. I’m making you my mentor-mother.”
Haley snorted. As if. “I can make you a list of mothers who would gladly fit the bill. And not one of them would be me.”
“Then we’ll learn together,” Fee decided. “That’s what sisters are for, right?”
It was, Haley realized. But how could she willingly agree to keep the boys long-term if she couldn’t manage to keep them safe?
Brett called just then.
She let the call go to voice mail. He’d stopped by with food, with DVDs and coloring books, with gentle words of wisdom.
She’d avoided all of it, afraid he’d hate her if she let the boys go and that she’d hate herself if anything else happened to them.
A text alert appeared. Brett never texted her. But when she opened the text, she saw why he hadn’t resorted to voice mail. Voice mail she could ignore. His text?
No way.
Taking Todd tomorrow while Tyler’s in school. Sit home or go to work. Your choice.
Haley’s mouth dropped open.
“Trouble?” Fee asked. She shifted her left brow up in question.
“Trouble for Brett Stanton if he thinks he can boss me around,” Haley sputtered.
Fee dipped her chin, smiling.
“It’s not funny.”
Fee shook her head, eyes down, but Haley was pretty sure her lips still quirked up. “Of course not. How awful to have a marvelous, gorgeous man willing to help you out. Take care of you. Help with the kids. I don’t know a woman on Earth who’d like that.”
“Very funny.”
Fee slanted the smile Haley’s way as she finished nursing the baby. “Look me in the eye and tell me you’re not over-
the-moon in love with the guy and just too afraid of following our parents’ foolish footprints.”
In love with the guy.
In love with Brett.
His warmth. His solidity. His breadth of spirit and broad-chested vigor. The strength of a soldier in a spiritual man. A man whose very presence made her long to draw closer. Seek more time. Not once had he blamed her for Todd’s accident, but a battle-ready, decorated army veteran like Brett must recoil from the weakness within her. Wouldn’t he?
“I think you might be overthinking things,” Fee observed as she stood to pack up a now-sleeping Reilly. “And I might be young and foolish, and I might be guilty of loving the wrong guy—” her gaze shifted to the peaceful baby in her arms
“—but I still believe in the fairy tale. The happily ever afters. But from now on, I’m going to let faith and common sense guide me. Because now I have so much more riding on it.”
The look she settled on the sleeping newborn made Haley realize they weren’t all that different. Both searching, both needing, despite their age difference.
She cooked fried b
ologna for dinner and felt like a Food Network diva for making the boys so happy. By the time she got them into bed, she was exhausted mentally and psyched physically.
She sank onto the couch and surveyed the festive room. Her gaze rested on the Nativity scene. Two wooly sheep had been uprooted from their rightful spots. She picked them up off the carpet and gently set them in place. Her hand lingered as she studied the pieces.
Joseph, big and strong, a carpenter. Older than Mary, maybe wiser? Mary, heartfelt and trusting, but she had to be afraid, hadn’t she? And wasn’t her fear tested numerous times when those in power threatened her child?
Fee’s expression came back to her, the look of a mother determined to make her way for her baby.
Mary had been young. So young. But she’d taken charge despite her qualms, facing possible scorn and punishment for being an unwed mother, letting her faith uplift her. “My soul glorifies the Lord, and my spirit rejoices in God, my savior...” Her sweet, simple prayer, the magnificat, a song of acceptance.
And Joseph stood by her, taking stand on a quiet promise in the night, an angel’s word. How could she do less for these boys?
Man up.
Anthony had used that expression the few times she met him. She regretted not getting to know him better, but maybe God had given her a chance to do that now, by raising her brother’s sons.
And Fee was here, her sister, a pretty young woman in search of family, just like Haley. She stood, stretched and peeked in at the boys, tumbled in sleep. Tyler, just beginning to move beyond the shadows and fears that dogged him. Todd, a bit broken but healing from his impetuous act. She and he had both learned a hard lesson that day.
She glanced back at the manger scene, a tiny depiction of a most holy night. Could she do this?
Yes. She was silly and scared to think otherwise.
Should she do it? Care for two little boys who needed so much love, so much time that she might end up frazzled at the end of the day?
Of course she should. What mother wasn’t frazzled by the busyness of life? She’d just have to find a balance between busy and crazy, but she thought of the women around her. Maude, an active grandmother running a business. LuAnn, a woman who’d raised her kids and others’ children, giving, laughing, sharing every day of her life. Tina, a stalwart soul, tough and in charge, always willing to make things better.
His Mistletoe Family Page 19