He walked around the sparse hospital room as precious memories of Juliet bombarded him from all directions. Her smile and scent, the touch of her hands and the sweet give of her body haunted his every waking hour. How could he ever forget and move beyond what they’d shared together?
Looking up, Matt realized he’d circled the room and was now back beside his father’s bed. Apparently while he’d been mentally torturing himself, his father had been writing on the pad by his side. Now he motioned for Matt to read.
Liz made me angry. Love all that matters.
Love? Was that what this aching need in Matt’s chest was, he wondered. Is that why he couldn’t forget? Why he couldn’t envision his future without Juliet in it? He’d felt for a long time that he loved Juliet, but not until this moment had he found the courage to really admit it openly to himself.
Matt looked helplessly at his father and Mingo began to slowly scratch out another message.
Just watching his father’s shaky hand struggle to work the pencil intensified the importance Mingo put behind his words.
Precious time.
To emphasize his meaning, Mingo touched his wedding band, his heart, then finally pointed toward heaven.
Matt felt the sting of tears at the back of his eyes. His father knew what it was like to love, really love. He was telling Matt not to waste precious time. And suddenly he realized that Juliet going behind his back, or writing the article was not the real reason he’d broken their relationship. Deep down, he’d been afraid of losing her, just as he’d lost Erica, and his mother, and other dear members of his family. But now his father was telling him to live and love and not waste precious time. Did he have the courage?
Reaching for the cell phone in his pocket, he said, “I’d better call the family and let them know about your surgery.”
Mingo shook his head and quickly made an hourglass shape with his hands to signify Juliet. Apparently he was more concerned about Matt contacting Juliet than he was the rest of the family.
Matt sighed. “I don’t know, Dad. I’ll think about calling her later.”
Mingo gave him a weary smile, then an okay sign with his thumb and forefinger.
Chapter Twelve
More than a week later Juliet was sitting in the Cattle Call ignoring the salad in front of her when Angie popped down in the seat next to her.
“Is something wrong with the food, Juliet? If the salad isn’t any good, I’ll have the cook make you another one.”
Sighing, Juliet shook her head and poked the tines of her fork halfheartedly at the lettuce and tomato. “There’s nothing wrong with the food, Angie. I’m just not hungry today. I really don’t even know why I walked down here. Just to get out of the office, I suppose.”
The young waitress thoughtfully studied her friend’s glum face. “You look horrible. In fact, you’ve looked horrible for the past few days. Has something happened?”
Juliet’s lips twisted wryly. “Angie, you remember when we talked about the wedding I went to at the Sandbur and you were wondering what it must be like to be a part of that family?”
Her face wrinkled with confusion, Angie nodded. “Yes, I remember. What has that got to do with anything?”
Stabbing her fork into the bowl of salad, Juliet said, “I just got reminded a few days ago that I—” She looked at Angie and shrugged “—don’t fit in with people like them, either.”
Sympathy filled Angie’s eyes as she looked at her friend. “Well, that’s nothing to be sad about, Juliet. Sometimes fairy tales aren’t what they’re cracked up to be anyway.”
“That’s certainly the truth,” Juliet muttered, then looked around with surprise as she saw Nicci Saddler approaching her table.
“Hello, you two,” she greeted warmly.
“Dr. Saddler, how nice to see you.” Angie jumped to her feet and shook the woman’s hand.
“How’s that sweet little girl of yours, Angie?”
Angie’s face beamed and Juliet realized that even though her friend had very little monetarily, she was very rich otherwise. At least she had a child and the two of them were a family. Juliet had no one.
“She’s giving the babysitter lots of trouble, so that means she’s doing great. Thanks to you,” Angie said, then quickly excused herself as she spotted a customer motioning for service. “I’ll be back to take your order.”
“Don’t bother,” Nicci said to the waitress. “I’m only here to talk to Juliet.”
Angie hurried away and Nicci gestured to the chair the waitress had vacated.
“Mind if I sit down?”
“Of course not. It’s good to see you.” Juliet’s mind was suddenly spinning, wondering why Matt’s cousin had shown up today. She’d not heard from him or any of the family since her break with Matt, which had only reinforced the fact that her relationship with him was truly over. Even Gracia must have turned against her.
The other woman settled herself in the seat, then smiled across the table at Juliet. “Well, I thought about calling you at the newspaper office. But I decided I’d rather talk to you in person and I took a chance you’d be having lunch here today.”
“I have lunch here every day,” Juliet admitted with a shrug. “It’s better than having bologna at my desk.”
“The food must not be too good today. It doesn’t look like you’ve eaten a thing.”
Juliet’s gaze dropped to the salad bowl. “Oh, you know how it is, doctor, things that are good for you don’t taste good. I should have ordered a cheeseburger.”
Nicci laughed softly and Juliet glanced up at her. The woman seemed unusually chipper, which only made Juliet wonder even more about her sudden appearance here in the café.
“It’s good to see you, Juliet. We’ve all missed seeing you on the ranch.”
Tears were suddenly pouring from Juliet’s heart. “You mean you and your mother, don’t you?”
“Well, there’s Gracia, too. She’s been dying to contact you.”
Surprise widened Juliet’s eyes. “She has? Then why hasn’t she called me? Because Matt forbade her to call me?” she asked bitterly.
Nicci shook her head. “No. Because Mother and I talked her out of it. We didn’t want her to be begging and pleading and putting you in an awkward position. We convinced her to wait until her father has made things right with you before she called.”
Dazed by Nicci’s suggestion, Juliet stared at the woman. “Then she’ll be waiting for the rest of her life. Matt and I are finished. I figured you—everybody on the ranch knew that.”
“Is that the way you want things to be?”
Did the woman have to ask, Juliet wondered. Couldn’t she see the misery on her face? “No. But Matt is—”
“Stubborn. We all know that. But give him time. Things have been very hectic for our family these past couple of weeks. Mingo has had surgery and—”
“Mingo had surgery!” Juliet leaned eagerly toward the other woman. “What happened? How is he?”
Nicci smiled broadly. “Mingo is on the mend. Literally. A neurosurgeon in Houston operated on his brain and repaired the damage. There’s a good chance that he’s going to be well again.”
Joy shot through Juliet and she grabbed Nicci’s hand and squeezed it tightly. “You mean he’ll be able to walk and talk again?” she asked excitedly.
“With lots of rehab. But that will be a small price to pay.”
Juliet stared at her in amazement. “It’s a miracle.”
“We all agree. But the surgery was very tedious and Mingo could have died at any moment. It was all so stressful on the family and Matt refused to leave his father for even a minute. He’s just now gotten home to the ranch.”
So Matt had been gone all this time, she thought. Was that the reason she’d not heard from him? No. No matter what had been going on with Mingo, he could have taken a minute or two to pick up the telephone and speak to her. And the last words he’d said to her were that he never wanted to see her again. She had to believe
he meant it.
“What about Mingo? Where is he now?”
“At a rehab center in Victoria. The nurses are taking great care of him and the place is close enough for all of us to visit while he gets well.”
“I’m so glad. This is such good news. Thank you for coming by to tell me.”
With a wan smile, Nicci patted her hand. “I had selfish reasons. I want you in the family. So does Matt—he just hasn’t realized it yet.”
Swallowing at the lump in her throat, Juliet looked away from the woman and stared unseeingly at the diners scattered across the room. “Matt hates me for writing a story about his grandparents. And maybe he should. But the story isn’t going to be like he thinks. But that—that won’t matter to him.”
“Oh, Juliet,” Nicci said with a groan. “This story about Sara and Nate—it has nothing to do with Matt’s anger, not really. All sorts of yarns and chronicles have been written about our grandparents. Good and bad. Ultimately, none of them have hurt any of us. We’re still the same family we always were. Matt will eventually realize this. But in the meantime, maybe it would help if you tried to talk to him.”
Sighing, Juliet looked at her. “I’ve been asking myself if it would help, or if he would even agree to see me. If he turned me away, I’m not sure I could stand it.”
“At least you’d know you tried.” Nicci rose from her seat and patted Juliet’s shoulder. “I’ve got to run. We’ll talk again soon.”
Juliet watched the other woman leave the café, then glanced at her watch. Her lunch hour was nearly over and it was essential that she get back to her office on time.
She’d handed the Ketchum piece in to Gilbert and now, good or bad, she had to deal with the editor’s reaction.
Back at the newspaper office, Juliet entered the building through the back door and walked quickly to her private workspace. She was putting her handbag away and glancing to see if anyone had left a note on her desk, when she heard a footfall.
Glancing around she saw Gilbert striding toward her. The typed papers she’d given him were in his hand and he was staring at her over the glasses perched on the end of his nose.
“Mr. Gilbert, you should have called me over the intercom and I would have walked down to your office,” she suggested.
He waved a dismissive hand at her. “No need. I’m on my way to a meeting with the Chamber of Commerce.” He tossed the papers down on her desk, then folded his arms across his chest as he continued to study her. “That piece is not what I expected out of you, Madsen. I guess you know that, don’t you?”
She drew in a bracing breath. “Honestly, I knew exactly the sort of story you wanted me to write. But I took a chance that you would view this thing with an open mind.” She scooped up the papers and held them with the respect she felt the story deserved. “While I was researching the family, I realized that so many pieces had been written about them, but none had really focused on their lives in relation to our community or what they contributed to this whole area as ranchers and philanthropists. No one had delved into their personal relationship, other than to throw around the words adultery and murder.”
Gilbert grimaced. “You’ve portrayed them as a loving couple.”
Not about to let him intimidate her, Juliet straightened her shoulders. “That’s right. From what I can gather, they were wildly in love with each other. Their four children reinforce that notion. I’ll admit their marriage appeared to be stormy at times and I’ve expressed that in my story, but I also say that their devotion to each other kept them together.”
“Hmph. Well, you also insinuate that someone else killed Nate Ketchum. Not his wife. Can you substantiate any of that theory?”
“Maybe. Right now it’s more of an intuition than anything. But if I had a chance to dig more, I actually think I could find something to corroborate the assumption. Why?” she couldn’t help asking.
Juliet was suddenly stunned to see something like a smile cross the man’s face.
“Because I like your piece, Madsen. And I think readers will be intrigued by it. I’d like you to do more on the murder mystery. Play up the fact that you’re searching for the truth and not what people around here have always assumed happened to the rancher.”
She couldn’t have been more surprised. “You mean that?”
He snorted out something close to a chuckle. “I’m not necessarily a great newspaper editor, Madsen. When I walked into this job I was walking backward. But I’m smart enough to know that you’re good. Good enough to open my eyes.” He gestured to the papers in her hands. “We’ll run that in next week’s edition. In the meantime, use all the time you need for research.”
Dazed, she watched the editor turn to leave. “Thank you, Mr. Gilbert,” she called after him. “Thank you very much.”
Later that evening, on her way home, Juliet realized she should be singing and shouting with happy relief. Her long labored story had not only pleased Gilbert, but had seemed to make him do an about-face. The man was human after all and hopefully would be easier to work with in the future.
Yet none of this gave her joy. She was relieved the issue with Gilbert had been resolved, but she was feeling nothing remotely close to happy. What good was her writing, her job, if she didn’t have someone to share it with, someone to be proud of her accomplishments? What good was anything in life without someone to love?
Matt. Oh, Matt. Her heart cried his name as tears blurred her vision. She loved him so. Missed him so. If she could only make him understand how deeply she felt about him, she thought. If only she could make him see that he could trust her completely. But how? And would he even care enough to listen?
She didn’t know the answers, but it was obvious she had to try. Moving to Goliad and falling in love with Matt had taught her that she was finished with running. She’d run from Dallas to forget her disastrous relationship with Michael and she had forgotten him. She’d even come to realize that what she’d felt for her ex-fiancé was shallow compared to the deep feelings she had for Matt. Running to the ends of the earth would never make her forget him or erase the love in her heart. The only choice she had now was to stand and fight for what she wanted the most, a family with Matt and Gracia.
Coming to that decision, Juliet wiped the moisture from her eyes and stepped down harder on the accelerator. As soon as she arrived home she was going to change clothes and head straight to the Sandbur. Whether he liked it or not, Matt was going to see her again.
She was so intent on her plans that when she rounded the last curve to her house, she didn’t notice the truck parked beneath the tree in her front yard until she’d stopped her car and climbed out.
The sight of Matt’s vehicle froze her in her tracks and she looked dazedly from it to the front door of the house. He wasn’t in the truck or on the porch, and since she’d not bothered to lock her house this morning, that could only mean he was inside, waiting for her.
Her heart beating wildly in her chest, Juliet put one foot in front of the other until she was through the front door.
The living room was empty so she walked purposely toward the kitchen and the faint scent of coffee. By the time she reached the small room, her legs were shaking and her face had gone pale.
Matt was sitting at the small dinette, his hands wrapped around a coffee mug. Over by the cabinet counter, her Persian cat was licking at a saucer filled with cream. The idea that he’d bothered to care for her pet nearly made her burst into tears.
“He seemed to be hungry so I gave him a little half-and-half,” he said of the cat.
“He’s always hungry.”
She moved toward the table and he said, “I found the door unlocked. I hope you don’t mind me making myself at home.”
Still dazed, Juliet stared at him. He was dressed in a blue chambray work shirt with dusty jeans and boots. An equally dusty straw hat covered his black hair and shaded his eyes. He looked as though he’d just stepped out of the feedlot. But most of all, he looked downright wo
nderful to her aching heart.
“Of course not. Uh—have you been here long?”
With a brief shake of his head, he said, “No. Just long enough to make the coffee. I—er—I took it for granted that you wouldn’t be working late this evening and came here instead of dropping by the newspaper office.”
Her mind spinning, she eased the leather duffel bag off her shoulder and let it drop to the tabletop. Then running her hands nervously down her hips, she said, “I finished up at regular quitting time this evening and I—”
So many questions suddenly bottled up in her throat that she couldn’t say anything else and she quickly drew in a deep breath and turned toward the cabinets. Why was he here? To put the final end to their relationship?
Her hands were shaking as she reached for a cup and filled it with some of the coffee that he’d made. She was reaching blindly for the refrigerator door with intentions of getting cream, when he suddenly rose from his seat and caught her by the arm.
Her blue eyes lifted uncertainly to his face and her heart jerked with fear at the solemn gravity she saw in his eyes.
“That can wait,” he said hoarsely. “Right now I have some things I want to say to you.”
Twisting around, she faced him while her heart pounded like a wild thing in her chest. “I have things I want to say to you, too. In fact, I was planning to drive out to the ranch this evening. But now—you’ve saved me the trip. I guess you wanted to tell me about Mingo?”
His hand slipped up her bare arm until his fingers were curled around her shoulder. The contact filled her with yearning.
“You’ve heard about my father?”
Nodding, she smiled in spite of her trembling nerves. “I ran into Nicci at the Cattle Call today. She says Mingo is going to be well again. I can’t tell you how happy that news has made me.”
A wry smile twisted his lips. “Yeah, it’s made us all happy. Lucita and Marti have come home to spend time with him. And Gracia is on top of the world. She’s dancing on her toes, begging to go see him. I told her to be patient and maybe you’d be willing to make the trip over to Victoria with us.”
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