by Alison Mello
“Yes, but you don’t know why she split with him.”
I watch Zoey fiddle with the straw in her glass and wait for her to expand on what she said. The silence lasts a couple of minutes before I finally break it.
“Why would it make a difference why they split, Zo?”
“Because she realised she didn’t love him.”
“And what has that got to do with me?”
I eye her and she looks at me as if I’m stupid for not being able to interpret the meaning behind her words. She brought me here to talk and yet she hasn’t really said very much.
“What do you think it’s got to do with you, Reid? Do I really have to spell it out for you?”
“Well, that would be preferable to me sitting here like a dumbass, not knowing what you’re going on about.”
“Oh Reid…” she sighs before continuing, “She’s not in love with him because she can’t be in love with two people at once.”
“Wow, that really cleared things up for me. Look, I’m not trying to be harsh, Zo, but what Kara does in her life has nothing to do with me.”
I begin to stand and finish the rest of my drink in one gulp.
“Reid! Oh, my god. I know men are blind when it comes to this sort of thing, but seriously, why aren’t you getting what I’m trying to tell you?”
“Because you haven’t actually said very much, Zoey, and I’m about done here.”
“She’s my best friend, and it seems a little high school to be talking about her like this.”
“You’re not talking about her, Zo, you’ve barely said two words. Okay, so Kara finished with Sawyer because she didn’t love him. I feel sorry for her that it didn’t work out for them, but it really has nothing to do with me.”
“Okay, look, I’ll spell it out in words you can understand…” She sighs in irritation before giving me a look that indicates I should sit back down.
I don’t like feeling like a child, but the way Zoey talks to me, I can’t help wanting to throw a tantrum worthy of a toddler. I sit back down anyway and wait for her to enlighten me.
“So, Kara…she’s in love with you.”
I stare at Zoey as if she’s grown two heads. The thought of Kara being in love with me is an alien concept. I laugh derisively and Zoey shoots me a look.
“What on earth makes you say that?” I finally ask.
“A lot of things. The main reason is because it’s the truth. She’s my best friend and I know her inside and out. Girls talk, you know. It’s not such a strange concept that a best friend would know that kind of thing.”
“You’re wrong on this one, Zo, trust me.”
“You keep on believing that and you’ll miss out on the chance of true happiness.”
I scrub both hands over my face and rest my head in my hands on the table. I want to believe her, I really do. But I think pregnancy has done something to her brain. It’s her hormones. She’s happy and she wants her best friend to be too. But trying to set the two of us up would be a disaster. Kara can’t love me because I’m her best friend’s ex-fiancé and I’m not good enough for her.
Zoey and I chatted a bit more before I left The Vineyard. Now I’m sat at home with a bottle of Bud in hand and I’m clueless what to do. My head feels like mush. I don’t know what I was expecting when she said we needed to talk, but this definitely wasn’t on the list of possibilities, not in my mind.
I want so much for what she said to be true, but what can I do about it even if it is?
I set my beer down instead of drinking it and I grab my car keys from the table. I don’t know where I’m going, but anywhere is better than being alone with my crazy thoughts.
Chapter Fifteen
Kara
Work has been my lifeline these last few days. The guilt over hurting Sawyer has been like a noose round my neck. I never meant for things to turn out the way they have, but it would’ve been worse to let things go on when my heart wasn’t in it.
Liam has been keeping me company at work and we’ve been preparing for the book signing with T.H. Moore tonight. When I opened up this morning and saw Liam walk in a few minutes later, I felt lighter than the past few days. He was in a chatty mood, as ever, but more so because he’s fangirling over Trudy.
“She’s just so cool and I can’t wait to meet her. Talking to her assistant, it seems like Trudy’s looking forward to it too.”
“I’m glad. We’ve sold out of tickets to tonight’s event, so it should be a great turnout.”
Liam gives me a knowing smile. He knows just how I’m feeling at the moment. I’m trying to push my feelings to one side and muster as much enthusiasm for tonight as I can.
“I’m just waiting for her to get here. I know I’m going to just totally fangirl all over the place.”
“Going to? You already are!” I tease.
“I can’t help it, she’s just the most awesome author ever. Do you read her tweets? She’s hilarious.”
“Yeah, she’s really friendly and interactive with her fans too.”
“Should I go and make sure the room is set up for her?”
“I was hoping you could re-adjust the Indie shelves for me first, as we’ve got some new stock in.”
A smile lights his face and he turns to go to the stockroom.
“Thanks, Liam, you’re a star. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
I go to the coffee bar and grab us both a drink before we open.
***
Today’s gone by in a flash and now I’m helping Liam put the last of the chairs out for tonight. My phone chimes in my pocket and I stop for a moment to answer it.
“Hello.”
“Hello, is this Kara?”
“Yes.”
“Hi Kara, I’m Debbie, Trudy’s assistant.”
“Oh hi, are you here already?”
They were a few minutes earlier than expected.
“Yes, we’re outside in the car park.”
“I’ll send Liam down to let you in.”
Liam’s only too happy to be the one to greet the ladies. He walks off, whistling as he goes.
“Thank you, Kara.”
“No problem, Debbie. See you in a minute.”
I end the call and straighten up the last two chairs.
Laughter rings out in the lobby and I walk down to join them.
The gorgeous woman with long black hair looks in my direction and I see the purple streaks she’s recently had added. She did post a picture on social media, but it looks so much nicer in the flesh.
“Trudy, so good to meet you,” I say as I stretch out a hand in her direction.
She brushes my hand away and pulls me in for a hug instead.
“Good to meet you, Kara. This is my PA, Debbie.”
I shake hands with Debbie, then smile at Liam, as he looks as though he’s about to burst with excitement.
We lead the ladies to the room set up for the event. Trudy smiles as she sees the way everything looks.
As the ladies get themselves sorted, Liam goes to the lobby to wait for the customers to arrive. I make sure the microphone is in working order, as I have a list of questions to ask Trudy and we need to be heard at the back of the room.
Looking at Trudy, I love her quirky style which is kind of rock chick, but nothing too outrageous. I love the dress she’s wearing—it’s black and the print looks almost like an x-ray of the upper body—I have the same one in my wardrobe at home because Zoey bought it for me, but I’ve never actually worn it. She’s paired it with silver knee-length boots adorned in skulls. I wish I had the confidence to pull off such a look. I’m too scared of looking silly, and although I’d love a tattoo on my leg, I couldn’t rock the ivy that I can see creeping up underneath the fishnet leggings she’s wearing. Nor could I pull off the watercolour style sleeve of tattoos like she has on her right arm. I love the ink I have on my own arms, but it’s not a proper sleeve, and isn’t as daring and beautiful as Trudy’s. I realise I must be staring and look aw
ay as I feel my cheeks colour. Thankfully I hear voices in the lobby and can turn my attention to the customers instead of looking like I have a girl-crush on this gorgeous woman.
As the last customer is seated, I turn on the microphone and welcome everybody. I take my seat next to Trudy and thank her for coming.
The question and answer session goes on for about forty-five minutes, and she has some really interesting answers. She has everybody hanging on her every word. Some people just have that kind of presence about them that captures your attention, and Trudy is amongst them.
After the last question, we move over to the table set up for Trudy to sign everyone’s books. There are about fifty people here, so it may take a while. Liam is busy taking photographs for the store’s website and I can see he’s having fun with it.
Once the last customer leaves, Liam and I manage to sit and have a chat with Trudy and Debbie. We get our own books signed and take selfies with Trudy. Her effervescent personality leaves little room for thinking about any of my own crap. It’s actually really nice to just sit and talk about something I am passionate about…books.
“It’s a great place you have here, Kara. I’ve had a lovely time. All the readers were so lovely, some brought me gifts, and they all seemed eager to get the swag bags Debbie put together for them.”
“I’m hoping Liam got some really good pictures of this evening for our website.”
“Oh, I did!” he announces proudly, flashing me his mega-watt grin.
“Has anyone ever told you that you’d look good on a cover, Liam?” Trudy asks.
I look over to see him looking shy, a look I haven’t seen often on his face.
“I’ve told him, more than once,” I say as I smile in his direction.
“I’m far too shy,” he admits.
I giggle to myself as I try to imagine a more introverted version of my friend.
“Well, if you ever change your mind, I could totally set up a photoshoot with some of my other gorgeous cover models.”
“That would be…” his voice breaks a little, “that would be amazing.”
I can just see Liam posing with some sexy guy for a cover shoot. He would have so much fun. He might be shy about exposing his body, but I’ve seen him without his t-shirt on and he really keeps in shape. He has that V women go absolutely gaga over. If he wasn’t gay, he’d be my ideal man. He’s easy-going, makes me laugh, and has a serious side, which makes confiding in him easy.
“See, what have I told you?”
I wink at him and blow him a kiss. He pretends to catch it, which is so cheesy, but he’s adorable.
We talk a little longer and Trudy hugs us both tightly before leaving. She tells Liam to think about her offer and to get in contact with Debbie if he decides to go ahead.
***
Liam and I open up and we’re still chatting about last night. It was incredible how many people turned up and we’d both had so much fun. What more can you ask for when your job gives you so much satisfaction? It gives me a sense of pride too. If I hadn’t opened the store, then I wouldn’t feel like this.
I’m still buzzing when a customer comes in and asks if she can check out the ‘mom and baby’ room. I ask Liam to show her round while I get the cash register sorted.
A little while later, the lady comes to the till with a copy of ‘The Very Hungry Caterpillar.’
“I loved this as a kid,” she says.
“Me too. It’s one of the most popular books in the children’s section.”
“I remember my mom reading it to me and I wanted my baby to experience the same with me.”
“How far gone are you?”
I look at her and she isn’t showing, so I assume she can’t be too far along.
“I have my twelve week scan in a couple of weeks.”
Her smile lights her whole face.
“Congratulations. I hope you liked the ‘mom and baby’ room.”
“I did. I’m sure I’ll be bringing my son or daughter here.”
“I’m Kara, by the way, it’s a pleasure to meet you.”
“Hi Kara, I’m Molly.”
“She works over at Madison Avenue,” Liam says as he walks towards us.
“Yeah, I’m a part-time waitress there. It helps with the bills.”
She looks almost embarrassed, as though being a waitress is something to be self-conscious about.
“I haven’t actually eaten there,” I admit.
“Oh well, you should come by some time, I’ll use my family and friends discount for you.”
“That’s so kind, thank you.”
“The food is gorgeous. Jason and I eat there sometimes. Reid even joins us on occasion,” Liam interjects.
At the sound of his name, I wince. I know that Liam is dating Reid’s brother Jason, but we don’t tend to mention him.
I ring up Molly’s purchase and put it in a bag for her.
“Thanks, Kara, I’ll see you around.”
“You’re welcome, Molly, see you soon.”
Watching Molly walk out of the shop, I daydream that I’m in her position. I guess I’ve always wanted the white picket fence dream; a gorgeous house, a husband, children, and maybe a dog or two.
“Earth to Kara,” Liam says as he waves a hand in front of my face.
“Sorry, did you say something?” I ask as I snap myself out of my wistful thoughts.
“I just asked if you wanted a coffee.”
“Oh, yes please.”
Liam wanders off to the coffee bar and I go back to my daydreaming.
***
The rest of my week went by uneventfully. Work was great, but I wasn’t really socialising outside of work, so I rang Zoey and asked if she wanted to go baby shopping. As the weekend is my own for the first time in a while—because Liam convinced me to hire weekend staff for the store—I intend to make the most of it. We’re going to the local mall to do a spot of shopping and then getting a bite to eat somewhere.
***
I enjoyed shopping with Zoey and we ended up grabbing something to eat at Madison Avenue. Molly was working and gave us a discount on the incredible food. Liam had been right about how good a restaurant it was and I wondered why I hadn’t eaten there sooner. Zoey took me back to the house she now lives in with Brock and I got to see for the first time what a gorgeous place they have. I was a little envious that she had exactly the life I wanted, but I was happy for her. Gone is the bitchy Zoey from years gone by. She’s now mellowed out and excited to be a mom and wife. We spent some time discussing the wedding and she asked me to be her maid of honour. Of course I accepted and we toasted with mock-tails, considering her inability to drink alcohol for the next few months.
Chapter Sixteen
Reid
The last few days I’ve been doing anything I can to keep my mind busy, but as hard as I try, Kara is still at the back of my mind. Liam has been trying to get me to go on a blind date, but that is the very last thing I want to do. He says I should get out of the house more because I’m in danger of becoming a hermit, my reply to which was that a few days of not going out other than to work does not constitute a recluse. Jason has been right alongside him, poking fun at me for staying home all the time, and trying to get me to agree to the blind date. I haven’t said yes yet, but I have a feeling they won’t shut up until I do. I might agree to do just about anything to take my mind off my feelings for Kara. I can’t keep moping about the place all the time, it’s not fair on the boys. I know they told me I could stay here until I found a house, but it feels like I’m getting under their feet, so I’ve made a decision to start flat hunting, it’s about time I got out of their hair.
I’m searching on the internet for flats to rent when my phone rings. I see Liam’s name on the caller ID.
“Hi Liam.”
“Reid, what are you up to this evening?”
“Flat hunting and a couple of bottles of Bud in front of the TV. Why?”
“How about meeting me and Jase
at Madison Avenue for a drink and maybe a bite to eat instead?”
So much for watching mindless TV with a takeaway.
“What time? I need to grab a shower first.”
“About an hour?”
“Without you guys preening in the mirror, yeah, I can make it there that soon.”
“Cheeky fucker!” he exclaims and proceeds to laugh at me.
“See you at seven, dude.”
I hang up and turn the laptop off. Hitting the shower, I’m washed and changed by 6:15, so I text Liam to let him know I’m going to grab a taxi and be there in about half an hour.
I’m sat in the bar area of Madison Avenue waiting for the boys to turn up. I wish they hadn’t picked this place because of how things went between Molly and me, but there’s no animosity between us and the food here is great, so I suck it up and drink my beer.
I’m onto my second bottle of Bud when I look out of the window and see a familiar face, a face that haunts my dreams most nights. She doesn’t look my way, but even from a side view, I can see how beautiful she looks. Long blonde hair blowing gently in the breeze, a blue dress that ends at her knees. She’s drop dead gorgeous, there’s no denying it. My heart beats erratically as I watch her enter the restaurant. I haven’t seen her in a while, and I’d be a damn liar if I didn’t say the sight of her now has my cock beginning to twitch. I have to keep it under control, so I look away and concentrate on peeling the label from my bottle.
I pull my phone from my pocket and tap out a text to Liam to see when they’ll be here.
Me: Hey, it’s past 7, what’s the hold up?
It takes a couple of minutes before I get a reply.
Liam: Sorry, held up in traffic. Don’t worry, I reserved a table, just ask them to seat you. Grab yourself a beer and we’ll be there soon.
Me: Okay, want me to get you guys a drink?
Liam: Nah, the colder the better, dude, we’ll sort ourselves when we get there.