by Zoey Ellis
“The Thrones have decided that your sentence is to Fall, however the Dominion League are petitioning for you to be released in order to assist Thea with the assignment of luring her mother out of the Demon Realm.”
Cam’s eyes widened. “They can do that?”
“If they can provide enough evidence, yes. The fact you are still possessive over Thea, even though you’ve lost your rage and are connecting to the Stream, absolves you from some of the behavior you displayed before.”
Cam grunted. “But helping Thea would only be temporary?”
Zak shrugged. “Yes, but by now everyone can see that your Fall will negatively affect Thea. We can make that case while you’re on the assignment—my original petition still stands.”
Cam lowered his head in thought. “Why is Thea’s mother so important to the League? They seem to be fascinated with her. They’re going through a lot of trouble to get access to her.”
“I know,” Zak said, tightly. “I don’t know the reason, and in all honesty, it’s not the most important thing right now.”
Cam nodded, breathing out slowly. He felt oddly relieved. “Thank you, Zak.”
“Don’t thank me yet,” Zak said darkly. “Thea is still suffering. The sooner you’re released the better.”
“Does she know any of this?”
“I’ve told her, but I’m not sure what she hears,” Zak admitted. “She’s so dejected; I don’t feel like she’s listening sometimes.”
Cam’s mood descended as he thought about Thea all alone, upset, and miserable.
“Cam,” Zak said, quietly. “I need you to shift.”
Cam growled and turned away.
“I know you feel more connected to her in your angel-form, Cam,” Zak said. “But you need to stay restrained. Any trouble you cause won’t help us and she can’t feel you anyway.”
Cam exhaled harshly. “She used to be able to,” he muttered.
Zak didn’t bother to answer.
With an annoyed groan, he shifted back into his normal form. The energy in the cell scooped him back up into position and held him firm.
“Be patient, Cam,” Zak said softly, before making his way out.
Chapter Five
THEA
Thea woke up to Dani knocking on her door. She lifted her head and then rolled over. She hadn’t seen Dani for a while but there was nothing urgent they had to talk about. Dani was getting on with her life, undertaking assignments and stalking the many angels she constantly swooned over. Thea didn’t want to drag down her mood. She knew Dani wouldn’t enter, even though the door wasn’t locked. It was considered the height of rudeness to enter an angel’s quarters without permission.
“If you don’t give me permission to come in, I’m gonna get Zak to come instead,” Dani called.
Thea sighed. She didn’t want Dani to hassle Zak. She awkwardly untangled herself from her bedsheets and opened her door.
Dani blinked at her, her arms crossed and her lips pursed.
“What, Dani?” Thea said, her voice thick from sleep and slurred from lack of use. She dropped her hand from the door and headed back to the bedroom.
“Oh no,” Dani said, warningly. She grabbed Thea by the shoulders and steered her towards the couch in her social room. “You’re not going back to bed.”
Thea dropped onto the couch and curled up in a corner. “I didn’t sleep well last night.”
“Is that your excuse for not answering my knock for weeks?” Dani said, sternly.
“I’ve been having bad dreams.”
“Tell me about them.”
Thea curled up tighter on the couch. “I don’t want to talk to anyone.”
Dani grabbed Thea’s hands and pulled her up, leaning forward to look her in the eye. “Tell me. It will help.”
Thea took a breath and told her about the horrible dreams. Since the first one with the shadow, they’d continued to get worse and thinking of Cam no longer helped. Sometimes she was running from the shadow in a field of coarse, dead grass while gray ash fell all around her. Another time she was swimming in the ocean, no land in sight, while the shadow grabbed her ankle and pulled her under. Another time she was in her own neighborhood but everyone was dead—corpses were strewn along the street—and the shadow was everywhere.
After hearing Thea’s dreams in full detail, Dani shuddered. “Is the shadow in every dream?”
“Yes.”
“Does it say anything?”
“No, it just laughs,” Thea said, miserably.
“Do you feel pain in the dream?”
Thea thought for a moment. “I feel like I do, but it can’t be real because it doesn’t hurt as strongly as it should.”
Dani nodded. “Your brain is recognizing you should feel pain, but you don’t.”
Thea’s thoughts suddenly turned to her father and her recent conversations with Amber. “Dad is getting better. Did you visit him?”
Dani leaned back, wincing a little. “Yes,” she said, quietly. “But don’t tell anyone. I kinda forced Simiel to give me authorization to do it. I just wanted to ease his pain a bit.”
Thea smiled. “Thank you, Dani.”
“I think you should get some healing from a Virtue too, though,” Dani said, a slight worry on her face. “I know you might be stressed about everything that’s happening, but those dreams sound worrying.”
Thea sighed. “I’ll speak to Simiel.”
Dani smiled and hugged her, before launching into a lecture about keeping herself presentable for visitors and eating properly. She’d brought some food from the food court, which she left in the kitchen.
After Dani left, Thea went into the bathroom and looked in the mirror. She had no doubt her looks must have concerned Dani; her face was swollen and puffy from sleep, her eyes were bloodshot with dark circles under them. She’d been sobbing in her sleep and was still crying when she woke up, trying to shake off the terror that swamped her.
She had stayed in her room since the Dominion League meeting, existing in a fog of uncertainty, only counting the days between when she went to call Amber, who was aware of her mood but unaware of the true reason. Now that she had talked about her dreams, the fog seemed to lift a little.
It almost hurt every time she thought about her mother. Of all the things she could have thought up about where her mother was, living in the Demon Realm would’ve never been one of them. Had she been a demon the whole time Thea was growing up? How could she have even become a demon? She hadn’t thought to ask the Dominion League, but then she never wanted to speak to them again. The more she thought about it the more she wondered why she hadn’t left the Angel Realm and gone home.
Her thoughts quietened as the reason came into focus. Camael. She couldn’t leave the Angel Realm for good without knowing his fate. If she wasn’t ever going to see him again, she needed to know before she left. Zak visited numerous times and she hadn’t been able to understand what he was saying to her with the fog pressing in on her from all sides. Now things were a bit clearer, she needed to know what was happening.
Her determination bolstering her, Thea got up and prepared for Zak’s visit, brushing her teeth and combing her hair back into a ponytail. She wasn’t sure if he visited every day, but when he did it was always in the afternoon.
She slipped into a casual shift dress and sat on her couch slowly eating some of the fruit Dani brought her. She soon felt more like herself, although it seemed nothing could erase the despair in the pit of her stomach.
Sure enough, in the middle of the afternoon, a knock fell on the door.
“Come in,” Thea called.
Zak entered cautiously, stepping into her social room with a frown. “You’re up.”
“I am,” Thea said, more confident than she felt. “How are you, Zak?”
Zak almost smiled. “It’s good to see you looking better, Thea. How are you feeling?”
When she couldn’t think of how to truthfully answer his question, Thea shrugged.
“About Cam?”
“Yes.”
A flutter of nervousness entered her stomach. “Go on.”
“I have been part of a petition with the Dominion League to get Cam released so he can help you with your assignment.”
“I’m not doing that assignment,” Thea said, immediately. “I’m leaving this place.”
“Thea,” Zak said, firmly. “I know you haven’t been treated well but the Dominion League recognize that now.”
“And they still expect me to do this assignment?”
“Don’t you want answers?” Zak held her eyes. “I argued with them that you should still do the assignment because I thought you’d prefer to be the one to speak with your mother; even if it’s only for a short time. Her slaying will happen with or without you; I thought you’d want to be involved so you could at least get the peace you need.”
Thea hesitated. She was desperate for answers, but could she really stay in the Angel Realm and deal with the Dominion League in order to get them?
“You don’t have to deal with the League,” Zak said, as though he’d read her mind. “I’m still your commander, and I will be your point of contact.”
Thea nodded slowly. “How long before you know if the petition will be successful.”
“It was successful,” Zak said, watching her slowly. “He will be released tomorrow morning.”
Thea stiffened in surprise, her mouth dropping open.
The silence between them hung for a moment.
“I need to know how you feel about working with Cam again.”
Thea swallowed. How could she explain? She felt elated and terrified, excited and horrified. So many conflicting emotions rose intensely at the mere thought of him.
When she didn’t answer, Zak leaned forward, his elbows on knees. “How about you just try and talk with him. And take it from there?”
Thea fidgeted. “On my own?”
A flash of shock hit Zak’s face before he quickly schooled his expression. “Yes. Cam has been connecting to the Stream, Thea. He doesn’t suffer from the darkness anymore.”
A weight Thea didn’t even know was there lifted off her. “Really?”
“Yes. He’s been connecting to the Stream since the moment he got arrested.”
Thea chewed her lip as she thought. Cam finally connected to the Stream. Although a giddy gladness brightened her mood, she couldn’t help but also feel apprehensive. “Are you hoping I’ll also want to be with him? Is that why you came to see me? Is that what he wants to know?”
Zak shook his head. “Cam has no expectations. But I do hope you two will be together. I’m just worried that your relationship will be destroyed if you can’t get past some of the things that have happened.”
Thea didn’t know what to say to that.
“Cam will help you find your mother, and he will support you like he did before,” Zak said. “Just tell me if you’re ready to see him tomorrow.”
Thea took a breath. “I’m ready.”
Chapter Six
CAM
Cam flew through the air relishing the feeling of using his wings again after so long.
The Angel Realm looked exactly the same as before he was detained; calm and beautiful with a relaxed atmosphere. He found it both comforting and disturbing. The Angel Realm didn’t develop and evolve like the human world, no matter how long a time had passed. It must have been well over a year, possibly nearly two, since he was detained, and yet nothing much had changed.
He followed Zak, his nerves strung tightly as they ascended higher into the air. He was so eager to see Thea but wasn’t sure how she would respond to him.
There was a point in the past when he realized that his mate was all he needed. Somehow he had forgotten that. He wasn’t sure when—maybe it was when he took the assignment, maybe it was when he felt the darkness again. But none of that was important compared to losing his mate. Losing her to death had been an unbearable thought, but losing her trust was almost as bad. He had lost it before, but it was never like this. If he had to give up his Power duties for Thea, he would do it instantly. He couldn’t take her for granted again. And yet, that wasn’t even an option now.
He didn’t have a lot of time to earn her forgiveness. He had to make sure he remembered his conversation with the Thrones when they released him.
“Camael, you are sentenced to Fall,” Sal had said. “Your wings will be clipped and you will be sent to the human world.”
Cam stood emotionless, facing the group of Thrones in a small hall in their Sanctum. He didn’t look at any of them in particular.
“However, a petition from the Dominion League has been granted by the Seraphim.”
Cam glanced at Adonai, who looked absolutely pissed off. He held in a grin.
“This petition releases you from your detention and grants you with the freedom to take on a particular assignment that will be explained to you by Commander Zakiel. You will be under my supervision, while on this assignment, although you will still report to your commander. Do you understand this?”
“Yes.”
“Once the assignment comes to an end, you will be escorted back to your cell and your sentencing will take place. Do you understand?”
Cam pulled his mind from the Thrones and glided in a slow curve as his building came into view, drifting above the tallest buildings in the Realm, not far from the Stream. This assignment was the only chance he had to spend time with Thea as an angel. Even though Zak was petitioning to get his sentence revoked, he couldn’t rely on that, and he didn’t want Thea to rely on it either.
They landed on the public entrance and used the flightway. It made sense that Thea wouldn’t want them entering through the balcony, but the formality of it felt unnatural to Cam.
Zak stopped outside a door a couple of doors down from Cam’s own. “I’ll wait out here until you’re ready to start the assignment. We have to start it today.”
Cam frowned at the door. “This is Thea’s quarters?”
“Yes.”
“She’s not staying in mine?”
Zak’s expression sobered. “You have a long way to go with her, Cam. Take your time.”
Cam held in the grumble in his throat. She was his mate; even if they were distanced, she should be in his apartment.
He knocked on the door and after a short moment, she opened it.
Thea had always been a beautiful woman. It was as though the Creator had had a direct hand in her creation. Her snowy coloring, her rich brown hair, and sapphire blue eyes always shone with something ethereal and indescribable that Cam had always been drawn to, but seeing her again after such a long time took all thoughts from his head. Intense emotion flooded him—his heart raced, his mouth went dry, and his stomach fluttered. She was stunning. Her eyes met his, her gaze powerful but hesitant. He couldn’t speak. She looked gorgeous, standing there looking up at him. And then her scent crept up on him, that delicious, fragrant aroma he had missed so much. He wasn’t sure how long they stood staring at each other but the urge came over him to be closer to her.
“Thea,” he said, his voice gravelly. Just looking at her made his body react, made him want to touch her, to feel her skin against his. He was overwhelmed with the urge to take her into his arms. He stepped forward but an uneasiness jumped into her eyes and she darted back a tiny amount. He froze, dismay slamming into him. “May I come in, Thea?”
She nodded, her eyes on the floor, before retreating into her quarters.
Zak grabbed his arm before he could follow. “Call me in if she starts to get… restless.”
Cam frowned at him but didn’t say anything. He nodded and closed the door behind him.
Thea sat on the couch in her social room. Her quarters were the same layout and size as his own, but she hadn’t done any decorating. The smooth beige walls were bare and it hardly had any tables, no flowers and no look of being lived in. T
he only sign of life was the food crowding the kitchen counter. He approached her slowly, noticing she was avoiding looking at him.
He knelt on the floor in front of her but she shrunk back in the chair, clearly uncomfortable.
“I’ve asked you to forgive me before, Thea,” Cam said softly.
She stilled as soon as he spoke, looking down at her hands clasped in her lap.
“And I’m asking you one more time to consider forgiving me. I never meant to hurt you—it was never my intention—and I’m sorry for all the pain I’ve caused you.” He watched her closely, but she didn’t relax. She was truly fucking scared of him. A desperation rose within him so fiercely he had to swallow the growl he wanted to release. He had been wrong—it wasn’t just about trust, it was about something much more than that. “I know you’re scared of me,” he said, trying to keep his voice clear of frustration. “I can feel it. I don’t know if you’ll ever be comfortable around me again, but I will be here for you whenever you need me during this assignment, okay?”
Thea nodded, her eyes still downcast.
“I’ve missed you so much, Thea,” he said, his voice hoarse with gloom. Her behavior toward him was like a knife in his chest and there wasn’t anything he could do about it. “I’m so sorry you had to be alone all these months.”
He raised a hand and slowly placed it on her knee. She lifted her gaze to his hand, and then to his face. Gazing up at her, he could see the lines of stress and fatigue etched on her face. Tiredness and worry were clear in her eyes, and something else… something he couldn’t place… possibly something he had put there.
He scooted closer. She stiffened, but he kept going until he was leaning against her legs. He placed his head in her lap and stroked the back of her calf.
“I love you, Thea,” he whispered. “I will always love you, even if you don’t love me. Remember? I am yours.”
They stayed in that position for a long moment, and then he felt her relax underneath him. Soon the faint brush of her palm stroked his forehead and her fingers gently played with his hair. “I’m yours too,” she whispered.