They were on the drive where she’d gone out to greet him when she’d seen the car pull up outside and he said, ‘Maybe we should go inside to talk rather than discussing our affairs out here. I’ll get my stuff in later.’
Once they had closed the door behind them she said sombrely, ‘It is awful that you have to justify yourself to these people who can decide your future with just a few words.’
‘They won’t be doing that, Laura, it’s sorted,’ Gabriel said, wishing he didn’t have to tell her in one way, yet in another he needed to see her reaction when he told her that he was giving up oncology and anything else medical.
He wanted her to know how much he regretted his past fixation with his career and wanted to put things right between them, but before he could explain she was saying joyfully, ‘You mean it’s all right? You don’t have to face any meeting of the board? Your job is safe?’
‘Not exactly,’ he said slowly, with a sinking feeling inside. ‘At this moment I have joined the ranks of the unemployed. I’ve just told James that I’m quitting.’
‘What?’ she asked in a strangled whisper. ‘It was your life, Gabriel! You can’t just walk away from it.’
‘Yes, I can,’ he told her. ‘Before I became a workaholic you and the children were my life, we had a good marriage, were a happy family, but always there was in my mind the longing to try to save others from the same fate as my parents and I let it govern me.
‘But not any more. I intend to make up for my neglect of you by being here when you need me, and also when you don’t. This place you have moved us to is paradise and I intend to make every moment count.’
‘What about your staff?’ she asked urgently. ‘Your team worship you. What will they say?’
‘They know. After I’d told James I went to see them.’
‘And how did they react?’ she croaked.
‘They weren’t happy, but I explained that I wouldn’t have been able to take up where I’d left off with them for some weeks or even months if I’d intended staying, as it would have depended on the powers that be whether I would still be able to practise, so there you are.’
Yes, there I am, she thought. Obviously the days are gone when we made life-
changing decisions together.
The nightmare she’d created that day at the hospital was still there, assuming larger proportions all the time, and now there was this awful news that Gabriel was ready to cast his life’s work aside because of it.
All it had needed had been a little adjustment in their lives, a little more time spent with her and the children, but it had turned into a monster that was eating up their happiness, what was left of it.
‘And what are we going to do about the town house?’ she asked, as if she cared after what she’d just been told.
‘Nothing for the moment,’ was the reply. ‘It is too early to start making any decisions about that.’
‘Yes, whatever,’ she agreed wearily, and moving towards the kitchen turned her attention to something less shattering, the preparation of the evening meal.
Dismayed at her reaction to his news, he followed her and framed in the doorway said softly, ‘Laura, please don’t be like this. Life can only get better without the weight of my job in our lives.’ But she carried on peeling and slicing vegetables with her head turned away from him as her hopes for their lives getting back to normal were disappearing with the news of the extreme measures he’d gone to for her sake.
She’d never wanted anything from him except a little more of his time, but Gabriel had given her all of it in one magnificent gesture, and instead of being overjoyed she was horrified.
The atmosphere during the evening was not lively. The meal had been mediocre due to the state of mind of the cook, and Sophie was developing some sort of a virus infection, was hot and fretful, and was for once happy to go to bed.
With nothing they wanted to say to each other after the painful moments in the kitchen earlier, they went up to bed themselves not long after the children, and once again Gabriel headed for the spare room after he’d checked that Sophie was no worse and was sleeping peacefully. Tonight Laura was relieved that she wasn’t going to be sharing a bed with her husband.
The next morning when she went downstairs after a night that had been a mixture of dozing and sleeplessness and checking on Sophie, Laura heard voices and found Gabriel giving the children their breakfast amidst lots of laughter, with his daughter looking better after a good night’s sleep.
‘What can I get you?’ he asked, taking note that she was pale and puffy-eyed. He felt like kicking himself for unloading the news that he was jobless of his own choice the moment they had been together again.
‘Just a cup of tea,’ she said, and perched down beside the children, who had almost finished eating. She could feel Gabriel’s dark gaze on her and turned away. She was in no mood for any further discussion at such an hour and when she’d finished the drink went upstairs to get ready for whatever was waiting for her at the practice.
How he was going to spend his day she didn’t know and wasn’t going to ask. If he intended staying here with them at Swallows Barn, as he had said he would, their roles were going to be reversed, and it wasn’t an unhappy thought to know that she was going to be the one who came and went jobwise, while he took over the role that had been hers in the form of seeing the children to school, shopping, cooking and keeping the house in order.
It hadn’t been like that when they had first been married, they’d shared the chores because they’d both had jobs. But when the children had come along and Gabriel’s workload had assumed huge proportions, she had fallen into the role of the domestic ‘goddess’, and although accepting that it was a necessary procedure she had sometimes been reminded of how her mother had been kept tied to household chores by her domineering father, and how she, Laura, had vowed that she was never going to be the same.
But with a husband who was never there the mantle of it had fallen onto her shoulders and now maybe there was going to be a change of plan regarding who did what, and if she read Gabriel’s mind right, he wouldn’t bat an eyelid.
She was still in a state of shock from his news of the night before, but was adjusting to it, and foremost was the thought that if anyone was due for a fallow period in their lives, he was.
‘I’m taking Sophie and Josh to school again and will pick them up this afternoon,’ he informed her. ‘I have so much lost time to make up with them.’
‘Yes, I do know that,’ she replied. ‘Why not take them for a sail after school? They love being on the lake.’
‘What about you?’
She shook her head. ‘I have a practice meeting about the refurbishment of the premises this afternoon and can’t get away. I won’t be home until half past five at the earliest.’
‘And what would you have done with the children if I hadn’t been here?’ he wanted to know.
‘There is an arrangement at the school for those children whose parents can’t be there to collect them at the normal home time. Games and refreshments are available to keep them occupied until they arrive.’
‘I see.’
He was groaning inwardly, feeling even more surplus than he did already. But Laura had been in a position where she’d had to cope without him while he had been serving his sentence. She’d had to be on the top of things with regard to Sophie and Josh, moving house and going back to administration after being out of it ever since the children had been born.
No doubt her capabilities came from already having been thrust into the role of single parent while he’d been working almost round the clock. Maybe that was the reason why she’d mentioned divorce, the knowledge that she’d already done all the things that it would ask of her.
Sophie and Josh came downstairs at that moment ready to go and their stilted conversation drifted
into silence.
They could have all gone for a sail in the evening if Laura couldn’t be with them in the afternoon, he thought as the three of them walked to the school. But he’d been able to tell that she was relieved to be otherwise occupied and would no doubt have had a reason why she couldn’t go with them later in the day if he’d suggested it.
The barriers were up. He’d done the wrong thing as far as she was concerned in deciding to give up medicine, even if he was given the possible opportunity to take up where he’d left off. He was trying to atone for his neglect but she hadn’t seen it that way. She’d obviously thought him reckless and uncaring to unburden himself of his career in such a manner. Never in her darkest moments would she have asked him to do that.
* * *
He’d taken the children for a sail on the lake, as Laura had suggested, and as on the other occasions when he’d been with them on his own since arriving in Swallowbrook had enjoyed every moment of the time spent with them.
Was getting to know Sophie and Josh better going to be the silver lining of the dark cloud that had hung over him during past months? he wondered. He’d always been a loving father but because of the job it had been on a limited scale and now there was all the time in the world.
It was half past five and the three of them were walking towards the surgery, eating ice cream cornets. It seemed as if the meeting might be over as the only staff to be seen were Laura and a tall guy chatting on the forecourt.
She was laughing at something he’d said and he realised it was a long time since he had made her laugh. Cry, yes, he could do that all right.
When she saw them approaching he watched the colour rise in her cheeks, yet she was in control of the situation and on the point of introducing him to the stranger but she was forestalled by Sophie and Josh crying ‘Dr Hugo!’ and running up to him as if they knew him well.
‘Hello, you two,’ he said ruffling Josh’s fair mop, while casting a curious glance at the man standing silently just a few feet away.
‘Hugo may I introduce my husband, Gabriel Armitage?’ Laura said at that moment, and her companion observed him in astonishment.
‘Not the Gabriel Armitage, the oncologist!’ Hugo said, and when he received a nod of acknowledgement went on, ‘I am delighted to meet you.’
‘My daddy is famous,’ Sophie chipped in at that moment, and as the two men shook hands Gabriel thought that ‘infamous’ would be a better description, but maybe this nice guy hadn’t heard about his criminal activities.
‘I must go,’ Hugo said at that point, as if he felt he had to explain his presence to the silent stranger. ‘My wife has gone on ahead to get our evening meal under way. Laura and I were just comparing notes about the meeting that has just taken place.’
Turning to her, he said, ‘Do bring Gabriel round for dinner one evening, Laura. We’d love to have you both if you can find a childminder, or otherwise bring the children with you.’ And off he went to Lakes Rise, his house not far away, where his new wife, who he adored, would be waiting for him.
‘He seems a decent sort,’ Gabriel said as the four of them made their way home.
‘Yes, he is,’ Laura agreed. ‘Hugo made me welcome from the word go when I came here, and helped me to get settled in Swallows Barn. He was married just a short time ago to Ruby, our junior doctor who came from Tyneside to join the practice. She’d lived in Swallowbrook when she was young and had always wanted to be part of the medical team here. With regard to the two of them I think it was love at first sight.’
So Hugo Lawrence was a decent sort, as he’d imagined him to be, Gabriel thought, but he was the one who should have been there to look after Laura’s needs at such a time. Would he ever be free of the feeling of having let her down over and over again?
When the four of them had eaten, the children went into the garden to play until it was their bedtime, and noting that her listlessness at breakfast time was still there he said, ‘I’ll clear away, Laura, while you relax, and maybe when Sophie and Josh are asleep you might feel like continuing our discussion about the future from last night.’
‘I won’t have time,’ she said immediately. ‘I need to write up the minutes from today’s meeting before I begin getting in touch with contractors and others that we are going to employ to carry out the refurbishment of the practice.’
‘Fair enough,’ he said evenly. ‘In that case, I might go down to the pub when the children are asleep. I can’t remember when last I sat behind a glass of beer.’
‘Yes, whatever,’ she agreed.
He paused in the kitchen doorway on his way to join Sophie and Josh at their play and when she looked up he was frowning. ‘I hope that bringing work home from the practice isn’t a regular thing. It is a bit much for them to expect that of you.’
‘It is my own choice,’ she told him. ‘Something I do before starting on any chores that need to be done once the children are in bed.’
‘I see. In other words, you’ve got it all sorted and don’t need me around. Is that why you want a divorce?’
She didn’t reply. Had something happened to Gabriel’s keen perception while he had been shut away from them? She needed him with every beat of her heart, with every breath she took.
What had happened to them had taken the last of the glow from a marriage that had already been fading and she ached for it to be as it used to be, but not at the cost of him giving up medicine, never that!
* * *
Gabriel had done what he’d said he might do and had gone to The Mallard where the conversation would be light amongst the visitors and residents who packed the place on summer evenings. There would be noise, laughter and good temper, all a far cry from the home he had just left and the wife who had nothing to say to him.
* * *
The children were asleep and it was so quiet Laura felt she would be able to hear a pin drop. The notes she’d made that afternoon were in front of her and with little enthusiasm she began to arrange them into a semblance of order, but not for long. The phone rang and it was James at the other end of the line.
‘Laura!’ he said at the sound of her voice. ‘How are you?’
‘Surviving, James… Just about,’ she told him wearily. ‘If you want Gabriel, he has gone to the pub to find some light relief from my company.’
‘I did want to talk to him,’ was the reply, ‘but it can wait. You and I haven’t spoken since he was released, have we, and I’ve been anxious to know how things are between you. Has Gabriel told you that he’s giving up medicine? Leaving the hospital whether they want him to stay or not?’
‘Yes, he told me last night and I was devastated for two reasons amongst many, James. First of all because fighting cancer is his life, he will shrivel and die without it, and secondly because he has made a
decision of such importance without consulting me!’
‘That may be so, Laura,’ he told her soberly, ‘but it was you that he was thinking of when he did that, not himself. I’m just as upset as you are.
‘I feel for both of you, but I also have the cancer unit to concern myself about. The patients and staff here need him, or someone like him.’
‘What were his chances of being able to carry on if he had wanted to?’ she asked.
‘I’m hopeful. I will be pointing out that it wasn’t the force of the blow that was struck that nearly killed the other guy. It was the misfortune that the marble fireplace was behind him as he fell backwards, and I will also be reminding the board that Gabriel immediately cast off the mantle of the betrayed husband and stepped back into the role of the lifesaver that he has always been.’
She had to ask. ‘Does he still think he was the “betrayed husband”?’
‘He has never mentioned it since. I would very much doubt it, but he hasn’t said anything to me either, I’m afraid, except th
at he is filled with remorse about everything that has happened.’
‘I have never, ever looked at another man since the moment I met him,’ she told him.
‘That I can well believe.’ And she could tell that James was smiling at the other end of the line. ‘He has it all—the looks, the charisma, the beautiful wife and the high-flying career.’
‘That is in the past,’ she reminded him. ‘He hasn’t got a career now!’
She heard the front door click open and with a rapid change of subject said, ‘Gabriel is here now, James.’ Passing her husband the phone, she picked up the paperwork that she’d been sorting and went to spend another miserable night alone under the covers.
* * *
When Laura went down to breakfast the following morning it was the same as the day before, with Gabriel in charge again. Though he had only been back with her and the children a couple of days, already the four of them were slipping into a routine, with him as the house husband and her with the position of practice manager to go to each day. It was ironic that she was now the one involved in health care instead of him.
But she daren’t dwell too long on that. Just the thought of him idling the days away when he could be treating the sick made her want to weep, but of course there was the small matter of whether he would be given the chance to do that even if he wanted to.
Yet James had been reassuring and she couldn’t resist asking Gabriel if he’d said the same to him as he’d said to her…that he was hopeful for a clean slate for Gabriel as far as the hospital was concerned, because the blow that he’d given their neighbour wouldn’t have been enough to cause serious injury on its own, and that the fireplace had been a contributory factor.
He was engaged in pouring milk onto the children’s cereal and didn’t look up until he’d finished what he was doing. When he did and their glances locked he said, ‘Yes, he told me all of that, and a few more things as well, such as I was crazy wanting to leave medicine. But as I pointed out, he hasn’t got a wife who wants a divorce.’
Marriage Miracle in Swallowbrook Page 4