“I think I’ll step outside and wait for Cody’s mother to arrive,” he said.
“Knox, you aren’t going to do anything crazy, are you?” Jade asked worriedly.
He smiled grimly as an icy cold shell wrapped around his heart. “Don’t worry. I’m not crazy.” His fellow Rangers and several news agencies had nicknamed him Fort Knox because he was the unbreakable Ranger who had no heart. He was always in control of his emotions.
The sound of a car approaching from the distance tensed all of his muscles. He drew several deep, long breaths and then prepared himself to face the woman who had kept the secret of his son from him for nine long years.
* * *
Allison Rafferty couldn’t help the smile that curved her lips as she saw Cody and Jade standing just outside the stables. The sight of her son always made her heart expand with pride and joy.
It was impossible to hold on to the worries of running the construction company when she was with her son. On Monday she was going to have to fire a man, never a pleasant thing, but in this case necessary. But for this afternoon and evening all she had to think about was making homemade pizza and watching a movie with the little man in her life.
She parked and turned off the car engine, then got out of the car. At the same time a tall, broad-shouldered man wearing a black cowboy hat stepped out of the stables and into her view.
Knox.
Her breath hitched in her throat and she froze in her tracks. For a long moment her brain refused to function as she stared at him, and then a million questions fired off in her head.
Knox Colton... What on earth was he doing there? Oh, God, she didn’t want him there. Why wasn’t he in El Paso doing whatever he did as a Texas Ranger?
“Hello, Allison.” His eyes beneath the rim of his hat were icy blue.
He knows.
The two dreadful words echoed in her head as her heart began to beat an unsteady rhythm. “Knox, what a surprise,” she said and took several slow steps forward.
“It’s been a day full of surprises,” he replied with a pointed glance at Cody.
“Cody, why don’t you come inside with me and let Knox and your mother visit for a few minutes,” Jade said. “I think I’ve got some of those chocolate cookies that you like in the pantry.”
Cody looked at Allison for permission and she nodded her head, still stunned by Knox’s presence. She watched as Jade and Cody headed to the house and a million old memories fluttered through her mind.
Knox, dressed in a navy tuxedo to take her to the high school prom... Knox, naked and beautiful as he made love to her in the pool house at La Bonne Vie, his family home.
He had been her first love, her only love and the man she believed would be her forever love. They’d dated all through high school and after that whenever she could get back to Shadow Creek from the college she’d attended in Massachusetts.
They’d drifted apart during the last of those days, but when she’d had to quit college and return to Shadow Creek to take over her father’s construction company, she and Knox had resumed their love affair. The memories of loving and being loved by him warmed her.
She watched until Jade and Cody disappeared into the house and then she turned her gaze back to Knox. Any warmth her memories had generated instantly cooled beneath the chill of his arctic gaze. She raised her chin and waited for him to speak, her heart beating even more frantically.
“You’ve kept him from me for nine years.”
She wanted to protest. She wanted to reiterate the falsehood she’d told him years ago when she’d been pregnant and he’d called to see if the baby was his. But it was one thing to utter a lie over a phone line, quite another to stare into somebody’s eyes and lie.
“You left town,” she replied. He’d left her utterly brokenhearted and not knowing if she would ever have a future with him. That had been one of the reasons she’d lied to him, because he’d distanced himself from her, indicating that he didn’t want to be with her anymore. There had also been the fact that she hadn’t wanted her newborn son in any way associated with the Coltons, considering that Livia had just gone to jail for her heinous crimes.
“And then you had your new life with the Rangers. I didn’t think you’d care,” she said.
“You thought wrong. I had a right to know that he is my son, and he has a right to know that I’m his father.” His words were short...clipped, and he took a step toward her.
Anger and fear leaped into her chest. “You haven’t told him, have you?” How long had he been there with Cody today? What might he have already said to her son?
“I haven’t told him anything yet.” His tone was cold, dispassionate, and reminded her that his reputation was that of a heartless, emotionless man.
“Please don’t tell him,” she replied hurriedly. “What are you doing here in Shadow Creek? Last I heard, you were in El Paso protecting the border.”
For the first time a flicker of something dark shadowed his eyes. “I decided it was time for a vacation, and don’t try to change the subject. You’ve had nine years with Cody and now it’s my turn to have time with him.”
Everything inside of her stilled. Her heart stopped beating and her lungs quit drawing breath as she stared at him wordlessly. She’d always wondered in the back of her mind if this day would come, but over the years she’d convinced herself it wouldn’t. But here it was and she was so ill-prepared for it.
“How long is your vacation?” she finally asked.
“I don’t know yet.” He shoved his hands in his jean pockets. “I have a right to spend time with him.”
She didn’t care what was right in this situation; all she cared about was the best interest of her son, and she didn’t believe him spending any time with Knox was in Cody’s best interest.
“We’ve done fine without you. I just don’t think it’s a good idea,” she replied. “Especially now that your mother has escaped from jail.”
His shoulders stiffened. “My mother has nothing to do with this. I have rights, Allison, and if I have to get a lawyer and fight for them, I will.” The resolve in his eyes let her know he wasn’t playing. He was dead serious.
“I don’t want you to hurt him, Knox.”
His jaw tightened. “That’s the last thing I intend to do.”
She sighed. “If you promise that you won’t tell him you’re his father until I think he’s ready to hear it, and if the two of us can remain civil with each other, then I guess we can work something out so that you can spend some time with him.”
Worry fluttered through her. She didn’t want to do this, but Knox did have a right to get to know his son. The last thing she wanted was a custody battle. She had to do this right for Cody’s sake.
“I promise.” He pulled his hands from his pockets and took another step closer to her. “I don’t want to screw up his life, Allison. I don’t want to screw up your life.” His eyes narrowed. “But you should have told me.”
A flush of warmth filled her cheeks. “I did what I thought was best for everyone at the time.”
“You thought wrong.”
His anger was controlled, but she saw it in the tense set of his broad shoulders, in the thin line of his lips and in the depths of his beautiful blue eyes. “When?”
Next year...the year after, or maybe when he turns eighteen, she wanted to reply. “Next week?”
“Not good enough,” he replied.
She forced herself to breathe. “You can see him tomorrow after church. We’re usually home around noon.”
“Then I’ll pick him up at twelve thirty.”
A new panic leaped into her throat. “Pick him up? Where are you going to take him?”
“I thought I’d take him to Mac’s ranch. I haven’t had a chance to stop in there and say hello since I’ve bee
n back in town.” He crooked an eyebrow up. “If you’re worried that I’ll steal him away from you, then you need to relax. I wouldn’t do that to him.”
Relax? How could she when his very presence there had shaken her to her very soul? How could she relax when he apparently wanted to step into a parent role, even though he’d walked away from her...from their love so easily almost ten years before?
“Then we’ll see you tomorrow.” She was ready for this conversation to end. She needed to go home and process just how much he’d turned her world upside down.
“I’ll send Cody out.” He headed for the house.
Allison got back into the car and finally drew in a deep breath. She’d always felt half-breathless when around Knox. He was ten years older than he’d been the last time she’d seen him, but those years had only made him more attractive.
He was deeply tanned, which made the blue of his eyes more intense. His light brown hair was clipped short, emphasizing his chiseled, handsome features.
Despite the shock of seeing him, in spite of the simmering anger that had marked their conversation, she had to admit that he still held some sort of sensual power over her.
She’d wanted to brush her fingers through his hair, feel the strength of his arms around her and taste his lips once again.
Foolish, foolish thoughts. She’d been devastated when he’d left her ten years ago. Ten years was a long time. She had no idea what kind of a man he’d really become, and the last thing she wanted was to allow Fort Knox back into her life in any capacity.
Jade’s front door opened and Cody came running out. Allison drew another deep breath to steady her emotions. Whether she liked it or not, Knox was back in her life for now. She just prayed he wouldn’t do anything to hurt Cody.
Chapter 2
Anger still ripped through Knox as he headed back to Thorne’s ranch. The only thing that tempered it was the remaining shock of discovering he was a father.
Knox had never known his father. Livia had divorced Tad Whitman when Knox was only two and then she’d changed his last name to Colton and moved to Austin. He wasn’t even sure if Tad Whitman was really his father. There had been rumors that Tad’s father had gotten Livia pregnant.
After that there had been a succession of stepdaddies and new siblings, but never a real father figure in his life on a permanent basis other than Mac. Knox wanted better for Cody.
Maybe Cody already had a father figure in his life. The thought gave him pause. He hadn’t asked if Allison was married and another man was raising Cody as his own.
She was certainly attractive enough to have caught some man’s eyes. He hadn’t been so consumed by his anger that he hadn’t noticed she was even prettier now than she’d been when they’d been an item.
Her dark blond hair had been pulled back into a messy knot at the nape of her neck, emphasizing her high cheekbones and sensual mouth. The green blouse she’d had on had toyed with her hazel eyes, turning them more green than gold.
And nobody wore a pair of jeans like Allison. The denim hugged her long, slender legs and reminded him of how much he had loved those sleek legs tangled with his.
He tightened his hands on the steering wheel and embraced his anger. It was far easier to sustain that emotion than drift into ridiculous thoughts of his past relationship with Allison.
He’d spent far too many nights in the past thinking about her, missing her and wondering what might have been if they’d made different decisions so long ago. He’d also spent many of those nights hating her.
Almost ten years ago he’d called her to see if the baby she’d had was his. She’d told him it belonged to an old boyfriend and she’d gotten pregnant during the time after she and Knox had renewed their relationship. He’d hated her then for betraying his love.
He’d already been reeling because of his mother’s arrest. He’d told Allison in the midst of that drama that he just needed some time and distance from her. He’d needed a couple of weeks to pull himself together and to make sure his siblings were doing okay. But with his younger sisters taken care of and the rest of the clan self-sufficient, Knox had left for Texas and gotten a job as a Ranger.
He’d never really intended to leave Allison forever, but it had taken him months to get his head back on straight after his mother’s trial and all that dust had settled. Life with the Rangers had been all-consuming and just about the time he felt it was right to reach out to Allison again, he’d heard she’d had a baby.
The timing was right for the child to be his, but then she’d told him it wasn’t and he’d been devastated. Her betrayal had been just another blow by a woman...one he couldn’t get past.
But this betrayal cut even deeper. Dammit, she should have told him about Cody. He’d already missed so much of his life. Not only had he missed out on the wonder of his birth, but he’d also missed Cody’s first step, his first word...so many firsts.
He took the turn into Thorne’s ranch a little too fast and dust kicked up as the back tires of his sports car spun out. He quickly righted the car and pulled to a stop in front of the attractive ranch house.
“Hey, are you looking for a second job as a race-car driver?” Thorne shouted from the door of the barn as Knox got out of the car.
Knox waited as his half brother approached him. Thorne’s dark skin gleamed in the sunshine and his smile eased some of the tension in Knox’s gut, some...but not all.
Thorne’s smile fell and he obviously felt the tension radiating from Knox. “What’s up?”
“Have you ever seen Allison Rafferty’s boy?”
“Sure, I’ve seen him around town with Allison. Why?”
“Have you ever noticed that he looks a lot like me?”
Thorne’s light brown eyes narrowed slightly. “Why don’t we go inside? This definitely feels like a sit-down talk.”
Knox nodded. The two men didn’t speak again until they were seated across from each other at the kitchen table. “I just found out that Allison’s son is mine,” Knox finally said.
Thorne’s eyes widened in surprise. “I had no idea,” he replied. “I remember there was some speculation and a little scandal when everyone realized she was pregnant, but I figured if the baby was yours you would be here with her.”
Knox fisted his hands on top of the table. “She lied to me, Thorne. Almost ten years ago she told me her baby’s father was an old boyfriend. She’s kept him from me for all these years.”
Thorne leaned back in his chair, his expression thoughtful. “Can you really blame her?”
Knox stared at Thorne in surprise. The last thing he’d expected was for his brother to defend Allison.
“Think about it,” Thorne continued. “You had pulled away from her when Mother was arrested.”
“I had to make sure all of you were going to be okay. I thought I was going to take physical custody of Jade and Claudia. I was more than a little out of my mind when I left, but I always figured I’d eventually wind up with Allison.”
“Did you tell Allison that at the time?” Thorne asked.
Knox frowned. “No, I just told her I needed a little break from her.” He hadn’t wanted her to know how crazy he was at the time; he hadn’t wanted her to see him as weak. And then he’d heard about the baby and it had been the light in a sea of darkness...until she’d told him the baby belonged to an ex.
“Knox, you were gone and the Colton name was being dragged through the mud because of Mother’s arrest. The whole town had turned against us. Is it any wonder she didn’t want to burden her child with anything Colton?”
Myriad emotions flooded Knox’s head and he rubbed a hand in the center of his forehead where a headache had begun to pound. No, it wasn’t any wonder Allison hadn’t wanted that. At that time, Knox hadn’t wanted to be a Colton, but she still shouldn’t have lied to h
im when he’d asked her point-blank about the baby.
“Allison is well respected in Shadow Creek.” Thorne leaned forward. “Now her reputation is stellar. She’s known as a great single mother, a savvy businesswoman, and is generous in charity work. She gained a lot of respect for nursing her sick father until he passed two years ago.”
“She isn’t married?”
Thorne shook his head. “From everything I hear she’s totally devoted to raising her boy.”
“Why are you telling me all this?” Knox asked.
“Because she has a good life here and I don’t want you to blow into town and screw things up for her before you leave once again and she has to pick up all the pieces.”
“I have no intention of screwing anything up for her. I just want a relationship with my son,” Knox replied firmly. “Thorne, you have a great relationship with your father. You don’t know what it’s like not to have one in your life, but I do and I want better for Cody.”
“Don’t be a father to him for as long as you’re back in town and then forget about him when you return to Ranger life,” Thorne advised.
“I don’t want to be just a vacation father. I want to be in his life in a meaningful way until the day I die.” Knox’s heart swelled with love for the boy he had yet to really know.
Thorne grinned. “Then congratulations, it’s a boy.”
Knox laughed. “Thanks. I’m picking him up tomorrow and I thought I’d take him over to your father’s place. I figured maybe we could throw a couple of lines into the pond and do a little fishing.”
“You know Dad would love to see you,” Thorne replied and stood. “I’m surprised Allison agreed to letting you take him.”
“I threatened her with lawyers,” Knox admitted.
“Whew, you must have been mad. And now I need to get back out to the barn. I’ve been cleaning tack all morning.” Knox stood as well and on impulse gave his half brother a quick man hug.
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