Barefoot & Pregnant: A New Adult Romance
Page 9
*****
Earlier that week-
Annie, I am not lying to you. Honey, your thighs are golden. If God didn't want your thighs to touch he wouldn't have made Chunky Monkey Ice Cream. Mike is a douche-bag, a dirty cock-sucker and you are so much better off without him. But Sugar, I've got to go, you need to let me in there."
The wails from my roommate only escalated. And I knew that I had moments before I exploded. Not in outrage, but that was probably warranted. No, I needed to pee in the worst way. I am talking Niagara Falls here.
I hadn't ruled out weeing in the tub. It was that bad.
"Annie," my voice was starting to shake, oh wait- that was just me, as I bounced trying to hold the urine in. "I have to pee, Annie! Let me in there! You are not fat! We can share the seat. You are that thin!"
"Sam, this is an emergency," she sobbed through the locked door, "I can't leave the toilet for a second. I took that entire box of Ex-lax!"
Was there no one else that saw the irony here?
Grunting I did the only thing that I could. I made a beeline for dorm next door. A place I swore I would never enter, even if my life depended on it. And my life I would have forgone at that moment, but my bladder was another matter.
There is something you need to know about 2A. For starters, all three guys that live there are dick wads. They think with their dicks. They act with their dicks. They essentially are dicks.
I know they have individual names. Hell, I spent my childhood under the delusion that one of them was my best friend. But not to worry, middle school took care of that.
Let's call them, Holt, biggest dick wad on earth, and the other two idiot dick wads. Their goal in life is to hit on chicks, all chicks. Somehow manage to bang said chicks. Then spend most nights banging on our walls while banging said chicks until I've been up half the night. Some mornings I've barely gotten an hour sleep and can hardly make it through class.
If I thought middle school was bad when Holt dropped me faster than a training bra on the first day. All to start hanging out with Shelby Summers whose breasts were clearly reading on a tenth-grade level.
It was nothing compared to when he laughed at me during our senior year when I fell off the hay ride at Christmas-tide. Just- don't ask.
Holt's primary purpose from then on was to torture and otherwise irritate the living hell out of me. But desperate times call for desperate measures.
And I wasn't peeing in the damn tub... yet.
So, I strapped on my big girl thong and raced next door. There was no gentle knocking, I pounded on the door, and there might have been some screaming.
The door was wrenched open.
Apparently having just been awoken, Holt had sleep lines across one cheek. This should have made him look vulnerable. Or given me some advantage, that's how this is supposed to work. That is if fate wasn't such a bitch.
A sexy ass smile crossed his handsome visage, and I felt my panties catch fire.
Frowning I put my hands on my hips, my fingers brushing the edges of my underwear to assure myself they were still there.
He cocked a brow, folding his arms across his very firm, very naked chest.
My eyes followed the motion. A rookie mistake I knew the moment I locked in on his rock-hard abs. You never look at him directly! He's the king of the dick wads! He obviously has magical powers!
"If you frown any harder at me, Hunter, you're gonna have a unibrow."
That voice. I shouldn't have come here. I could pee in the tub. I turned around to leave when his arm caught my elbow. Damn, I think my panties might have melted again. Mistake! Mistake!
"I don't think so," his voice was close to my ear. "Why are you here, Hunter?"
That's another thing. He's the only one in the world that calls me by my last name. I'm Samantha Hunter, but he's always called me Hunter. And even after all this time, it gets to me.
"Ineedtouseyourbathroom."
"Excuse me," he questioned, stepping closer, essentially cutting off my air supply.
He smelled amazing. It was when I realized I had accidentally started leaning towards him I pulled myself together. I was just about to repeat myself when dick wad two or three shouted out from somewhere inside.
"She said she needs to use our bathroom. But it's going to cost her. I want to see her tits."
I was out of there. I didn't need this shit. I tried to shake my arm free, but Hunter tightened his grasp.
Holt frowned, "Rich, what's wrong with you, man? Apologize!"
Rich obviously had a death wish. Holt was built. He had been a starter on the football team in high school and gone to state for wrestling. I don't know positions or crap like that. But I do know they worship him like a God back home, and there is a reason why.
"Never mind," I mumbled rolling my eyes and went to leave.
But the next words caught me the wrong way.
"Probably nothing to look at anyway," Rich mocked.
Most days I would have walked away. Most days I could have flipped him the bird and wished I had the guts to pee on his door. But this was not that day.
I launched myself at him, "You gigantic ass-hole dick wad, I've got awesome tits!"
Rich's eyes grew to double their size, "Shit!"
I beat him squirming away every time Holt got his hands on me. Holt might be bigger and stronger. But I was quicker and a lot angrier. Rich was scared, which I loved.
Holt finally hauled me off his roommate and threw me down before straddling my waist. His sweaty body draped over mine combined with my already melted panties made it easy to trap my hands above my head.
"Shit, Hunter," Holt was not looking at my face. It was then that I realized I had somehow lost my oversized t-shirt in the tussle. His eyes were glued to my tiny black see thru bra. And there were the girls, saying hello - excellent.
Aw shit, this wasn't happening, not now, not ever.
I yanked my hand out of his grasp and punched him as hard as I could.
How could I forget he was a bleeder?
Or that I was the unluckiest person on earth? Who else would punch their ex-best friend while they are both half naked in a non-violence dorm? What were the odds that the RA would be walking by? And that Rich would file a police report?
In better news, Holt did not complain about the broken nose, or that I may have had an accident in the back of the police car with him present.
I take full responsibility for the whole damn thing. I just forgot, for a tiny moment, we have a 'no violence' policy in the dorms. But it was the stupid cock suckers fault - you see that, right?
CHAPTER 2 - SAM
“How long has she been on the sauce? Aww, it’s gonna come back to haunt her someday. You just can’t mess with that shit.” Dick-wad number one said.
“Dude, you said she didn’t have a problem anymore. Where did she get the money anyway?” responded dick-wad number two.
"You know she probably stole it. She doesn't have two dimes to rub together." dick-wad number one knew a lot about me surprisingly which was weird since I didn't even think I remembered his name.
“You sound like my damn grandma.” Dick-wad number two had a point.
“You would have loved the sounds she was making last night when I went down on her.” Dick-wad number one made me smile. He had promise.
Dick-wad number two was not impressed, “You are such an asswipe!”
“Whatever nut-licker!” you could hear the smile in dick-wad number one’s voice.
“Shut-up you two!” I’d know Holt’s voice anywhere.
Why Lord, why did he have to be here too? Couldn’t you have sent a tropical storm or malaria?
"I think she is living in there, man. What kind of a chick lives in her car?" And that was Rich. I would kill him if given a chance, and the non-violence policy, not applicable where I was currently residing.
I was depressed and broke as hell, but not deaf. Were they that stupid? Could there be any bigger dick wads? I ask you.
What could be more perfect than my already shitty life? Maybe someone could come along and rip out a lung, and I could see about removing all my skin?
"Open up, Hunt," I heard Holt knock on my window, but I just ignored him.
I reached around finding my stash and popped another hit. The sweetness hitting my bloodstream and immediately things started feeling better. There was an explosion behind my eyes, I could feel it in the veins. I needed this. I didn't care if they thought I was addicted.
The could bite my lily-white ass for all I cared. This was all I had left.
"Hunter put the peanut butter M&M's away. You are better than this."
My eyes flashed open. He had no idea what I was better than. And sometimes when life went to the crapper you just had to go along with it.
I flipped him the bird sending him the meanest look I possibly could. Then I took a huge handful and dumped them down my throat.
I’d show him.
Holt Coulter could rot in rich playboy hell for all I care. What did he know about being the poor drug addict’s daughter? What did Holt Coulter know about having absolutely nothing? How dare he judge me for having a slight - and I mean a slight - issue with eating too many peanut butter M&M's?
So, what if they were not a balanced diet. It was protein. Obviously, I am on a protein diet, doesn't it appear that way? So, what if I might have swiped a $20 from him when we were moving out of the dorms. Most of it was spent on gas - at least $10.
The size of my ass is my problem, not his unless I choose to sit on him - which I am considering. And probably not even then.
The only concern was that in my attempt to show him, I had managed to lodge one in my throat.
“She’s choking! No! Hunter, open the car!” Holt started pounding on the windows. “Unlock the door, Hunter, now!”
I knew that what he was saying made sense, but I couldn’t breathe.
Dick-wad one and two were running around all crazy pants, somehow that I remember quite clearly.
Annie, of course, was in tears.
Rich took one look at me, “They are going to think I killed her. I am out of here.”
As things started going dark around the edges, I remember being sad that I wasn't going to be able to kick his ass again today.
The next thing I knew I was laying on the concrete of the parking lot.
My stash was not anywhere in reaching distance. I know because it was the first thing I reached for when I was finished speaking with the idiots.
Dick-wad one noticed, he leaned over me with a concerned stare. "You need to stop eating so many processed sugars. They are going to kill you one day."
My eyes narrowed. My throat hurt like a bitch, but I was breathing. I didn’t respond to Malibu Barbie because I figured that anything I had to say would be highly toxic.
Swinging my eyes around I caught sight of my car and what was left of the passenger window.
“No!” I screamed out, the sound tortured and far sadder than anything I’ve let go in quite some time.
Annie was by my side in seconds, tears still running down her perfect face. "Sammy, we couldn't get you out. You were unconscious. I thought you were going to die. I was scared. It was terrible."
You see Annie truly is gorgeous. The girl is Latino through and through, rocking body, all heart, and full of personality. Mike the cock-sucker was an idiot ever to call her fat. Even after crying her eyes out she looked like runway material. I could tell Dick-wad two, and the newly christened Malibu Barbie agreed with me 100%.
I breathed a sigh and determined to let it go. I knew that it would only further upset Annie and it had been a bad week for all of us.
“Don’t worry about it, Sugar. Just where is my fix?”
Annie looked away biting her lip.
Aw hell no.
"What did he do?" the words left my mouth relatively calmly.
The boys took a step back - maybe there weren't as stupid as they looked.
“He said that there would be glass in the M&M’s, from the window. He went to see about getting it fixed.” Annie stumbled over the words.
I could feel the muscles in my body solidifying, “He, as in, the King of Dick-wads? As in I can’t mind my own business?”
The boys looked at each other before busting up.
Annie gave them a death glare, “He was only trying to keep you safe, Sammy.”
Rolling my eyes, I went over to my car, "I'm so glad you all stopped by."
“You can’t live in your car, Sam,” Annie called out.
“Can, have and will,” I replied.
“She’s feisty, I like her,” Malibu Barbie offered. “If I had the money I would get a place for her.”
“Sam, just sneak back to my dorm with me,” Annie begged.
“I refuse to have both of us kicked out. That’s not what your parents are paying for. Now, you have overstayed your welcome. Be gone.”
I heard them go grumbling, but I had a sneaking suspicion they would be back. But the joke was on them. I wouldn't be there.